After becoming a teacher, I was consumed by self-doubt every day. How do I get over over-rumination?

Hello! I'm a heart exploration coach, Fly.

You're new to teaching and eager to gain experience managing a class. You're eager to receive feedback from your students and use it to improve. Your daily work is a challenge, but you're up for it!

Take your time, my dear! Give yourself and your students some time. From your writing, I can feel your deep sense of responsibility, which is wonderful! Just like in exams, the better the student, the more pressure they feel because they value it so much. They will blame themselves for losing even one point, but that's okay! On the contrary, children who don't like to study don't care about their grades at all, so naturally they don't feel any pressure.

1. It's time to rethink the relationship between you and your students!

You say that the students here are not easy to "manage," and you pretend to be "very fierce" so that they are "afraid" of you. But there are always people who "disobey" management, and that's okay!

You have placed yourself in opposition to your students, and are treating them as enemies. But there's no need for that! The relationship between teacher and students should be one of alliance, with you and your students sharing a common goal: to complete your studies.

They are the "main characters" and you are the "supporting actors." Let's provide some excellent class services to help them complete their studies within the prescribed time!

Your goals are the same, but the paths to achieve them are different. This is an amazing opportunity for you to see the consistency in your shared goals and aspirations. It's also a chance for you to recognize that people with different paths are not necessarily enemies.

When it comes to dealing with people in society, we all know the saying, "People are respected out of respect, and no one is afraid of anyone." And that's a great thing! It means that although you are the teacher and they are the students, you are equal at the level of "people."

So, let your students see how sincere you are and gain their respect through your strength!

A teacher's authority is not something that can be "put on"; it is revealed in their exemplary role in teaching and in their actions. Try to "crouch down" and look them in the eye, not down at them. Treat them sincerely and as equals from the heart, and trust them. This trust also comes from confidence in yourself, because "confidence brings trust."

?2. Learn more and ask for advice to gain more experience!

We can't change other people, but we can change ourselves! And when we do, the other person will naturally have to make changes to adapt to our changes.

Dear one, don't be disheartened! I'm sure you can talk to people who have been in your shoes and they'll tell you they've had the same experiences as you. You can communicate and consult with experienced people, especially good teachers. "Three people walking together will surely have a teacher among them." But remember, you must have your own summary and thinking, and innovate your own way of getting along with students!

You should definitely check out some great movies about teachers! "The Chorus," "Freedom Writers," and "Good Will Hunting" are all excellent films that really capture the bond between teachers and students.

I really hope the above is helpful to you, and I love you so much! ?

If you want to keep the conversation going, just click "Find a coach" in the top right corner or at the bottom. I'd love to keep chatting with you one-on-one and see how we can grow together!

Hello!

I can sense the emotions bubbling up inside the questioner—a mix of self-reproach, shame, frustration, and sadness.

You were bullied at school, and now you've chosen to become a teacher.

This is a link you've kept with your past self.

It's like you can now say to your past self, "Don't be afraid, kiddo, I'm here. Don't be afraid."

You can give courage to that old self. It's a kind of self-empowerment.

And when you started this job, you faced a lot of unexpected challenges. It also brought back some unpleasant memories from childhood.

It takes time to settle into a new job, so when you find yourself in a situation that you can't adapt to, it just means that you've made an effort. So please be kind to yourself and accept this part of your efforts.

The students are acting out, and you're not sure what to do, so you just put on a stern face. When you do that, you don't appreciate how well you get along with them.

In the Indian movie "Hichki," she took over a class with the lowest grades in the whole grade. The students in the class were all children from poor Indian families.

The students teased the teacher about her hiccups by singing a rap, and the teacher, who was also hiccupping, broke with convention and made music with them and sang the rap.

She can look at her hiccups with self-appreciation, so she isn't afraid of being teased by her students. Then she can interact with her students in a way that they can accept.

She teaches math and physics to kids and mixes textbook knowledge with common sense by incorporating physical activities like basketball.

Every child has dreams in their heart, and she gives them a chance to talk about them.

We see ourselves as a reflection for our children. When they smile, we smile back and respond to the best part of ourselves. Show your confidence.

In the movie "The Sound of Music," the governess Maria is faced with seven boys and girls of widely varying ages. She decides to help the kids keep their secrets and understand their fears.

When you share your story on a psychological platform, you're already trying to help yourself overcome your fears.

Sometimes you can meet your child's need for security, and sometimes you have to say no.

This is a form of loving, humanistic care. It's something children need, and it's something we all need as human beings.

Treat yourself with kindness and respect.