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After failing the junior high school entrance exam, I lost hope in myself. How do I move on?

depression Internet addiction mobile phone relapse art exam
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After failing the junior high school entrance exam, I lost hope in myself. How do I move on? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

I was diagnosed with depression in the first year of junior high school. In order to stabilize my emotions, I started to use my mobile phone, which led to a serious Internet addiction. I tried every method: turning in my phone, changing my phone, deleting all apps, but I couldn't kick the habit.

Sometimes I can manage not to go online for a while, but soon I relapse, and it's always been a vicious cycle. Every time I look at my phone, I'm disappointed in myself, but I keep encouraging myself, because I know I can't just give up.

In the third year of junior high school, depression and Internet addiction reached their peak. I wanted to drop out of school many times, but I didn't want to give up. My parents spent a lot of money on letting me study art. I don't have many ambitions, but I don't want to lose to others in art.

I finally made it to the art exam, but I did badly and felt sorry for everyone that I couldn't give them an explanation. I was desperate about myself and didn't know what to do next.

Arthur Arthur A total of 3169 people have been helped

It is important to understand the underlying causes of depression. This mental health issue can be addressed in the same way as other physical health problems.

To overcome your nightmares in a scientific way, you will require professional treatment. However, regardless of the method employed, it is important to remember that you are the one who can save yourself, and only you can save your life.

To the extent that others can provide guidance, you remain ultimately responsible for your own actions.

The online world is a virtual and seductive environment. It offers the opportunity to forget one's identity, avoid difficulties, and overcome inner fears.

By immersing oneself in the online world, individuals can temporarily escape from the realities of their lives and the depression that often accompanies them. Many people regard falsehood as a form of escapism, seeking to immerse themselves in it while attempting to find their authentic selves.

You are striving to overcome challenges in life with determination, yet you also seek the transient allure of beauty. This duality has led to a quandary.

You have numerous interests, but because you have previously avoided challenges, you have focused your efforts on the areas where you excel.

It is not acceptable to say that you do not want to be outperformed by others in the field of art. Art is derived from the pursuit of one's inner self and the interpretation of the world.

All art strives to encapsulate the artist's inner self, convey their thoughts in a creative manner, and imbue their work with authenticity.

There is a possibility that our lives will be adversely affected. Is our life already over? Is this really the end?

Ultimately, you are accountable only to yourself, to the authentic self that you often attempt to avoid.

The sacrifices and love your parents have given you are designed to equip you with the tools to better face the future and live your life to the fullest. Art is often a solitary pursuit, and artists frequently face a lack of understanding.

Is art truly your primary objective? What type of artistic output do you seek to achieve?

It is inevitable that we will miss certain opportunities, feel uncertain about our choices, and experience conflicting priorities. However, at the end of the day, we will all pursue the path that we have chosen.

One must adapt, change, or quit. Ultimately, however, it is the path one chooses, and regardless of the obstacles encountered, one must live out one's own style.

In the fast-paced world of business, it is easy to lose sight of one's identity and aspirations. The constant pressure to keep up with peers can lead to a lack of self-reflection.

Having identified their respective aspirations, they proceed along their individual trajectories or maintain their collective affiliation. They remain in a state of introspection regarding their approach to the future and the present, yet they neglect to acknowledge their relentless efforts.

We tend to prioritize outcomes over processes, but this approach overlooks the value of the journey itself. The experiences gained along the way can offer invaluable insights and guidance in future endeavors.

Life can present challenges and difficulties, but with the right mindset and approach, you can overcome these obstacles and succeed. Having confidence in yourself, aligning your actions with your values, and embracing your strengths and weaknesses are key to navigating life's hurdles. However, if you allow yourself to give in to these challenges, you may face setbacks and difficulties in achieving your goals.

It is essential to maintain an optimistic and authentic approach when dealing with uncontrollable circumstances. Conversely, when faced with controllable situations, it is vital to remain empathetic and disciplined.

It is unproductive to dwell on things you cannot control. Your anxiety will not change tomorrow, but it will affect your mood right now. Similarly, your fear will not change tomorrow, because the only thing in life that should be feared is fear itself.

After all this time, have you achieved the level of happiness and wellbeing that you previously enjoyed, free from the challenges you are currently facing? If not, I hope you are able to do so.

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Roxanne Roxanne A total of 9409 people have been helped

Hello!

Hug me! We all want to succeed, be recognized by others, and realize our dreams to the applause of everyone. This brings an invisible and tremendous pressure as we try to get closer to our dreams. This pressure makes us unable to catch our breath sometimes, afraid to relax, afraid of failure, and afraid of being abandoned. But who knows what tomorrow will really bring?

It's important to remember that what we're really afraid of isn't failure itself, but the emotional pressure that comes with being afraid to try and the strange looks we might get from others after failure.

After being diagnosed with depression in the first year of junior high school, she started using her mobile phone to stabilize her emotions. This led to her developing a serious Internet addiction. She tried every method to kick the habit: turning in her phone, getting a new phone, deleting all the apps.

Sometimes she can manage not to go online for a while, but soon she will relapse and the vicious cycle continues. Every time she looks at her phone, she is disappointed in herself, but she keeps encouraging herself because she understands that she cannot just give up. She knows that she can do it!

In the third year of high school, her depression and Internet addiction reached a peak. She repeatedly considered dropping out of school, but she was determined not to give up. My parents spent a lot of money on me to study art. I don't have many ambitions, but I'm really excited to see what I can do in art.

I finally made it to the art exam! I didn't do as well as I'd hoped, but I'm excited to keep trying. I felt sorry for everyone and couldn't give an explanation, but I'm looking forward to learning from this experience. I'm eager to see what I can do next!

Junior high school is an amazing time for kids! It's when they start to develop their own identities and become more independent. It's also when they need the most support and encouragement to be able to truly exercise self-restraint, use the smartphone correctly, and manage time reasonably. This is because they don't yet know in their minds what serious consequences unchecked use of the phone will have. It's not that they don't want to, but rather a limitation of cognitive ability. However, with the company of parents, her feelings will change, becoming stable and confident! The sense of security that parents bring to their children can allow them to let go of anxiety or temporary temptations and focus their full attention on the important things of the moment.

And this is also the reason why parents spend a lot of money unconditionally to pave the way for their children's studies, so that their children can feel motivated and loved and dare to try. However, sometimes this can also cause psychological pressure on the children. If they don't do well in exams, they will feel that they can't repay their parents for their hard work, and they will feel guilty and ashamed. What's more, a child with depressive emotions will be more inclined to attribute it to herself, rather than learning to express herself and her emotions to unblock herself.

This is why it is so important for families to be strong. It gives children the best chance to adjust quickly, learn to express themselves correctly, and grow up relying on their own abilities in the midst of suffering.

All the emotions that the original poster feels are real, and they're totally valid! But here's the thing: what amplifies our painful feelings is not the external constraints we see with our own eyes. It's our current inability to learn how to properly release our emotions and express ourselves. But here's the good news: if we can recreate the love that our parents gave us, we will no longer feel burdened, pressured, or ashamed. We'll be able to naturally express our emotions! Such true expression is the only way to truly make things simple and allow both parties to understand each other and work together to create a better future.

Frustrated? Don't let it get you down! There are plenty of ways to move on.

1. Embrace the opportunity to fully experience and start again!

Behind every success story is another one just waiting to be told! The truth is often full of holes, with countless attempts, failures, and attempts to define oneself. That is why they all seem so profound. This is not an innate temperament bestowed by one's character, but a layer of sediment brought about by experience. Therefore, strictly speaking, there is no such thing as a real failure, only experiences that have not yet been tried and experienced!

Perhaps it is the encouragement of parents and people around them that has helped the questioner realize that every challenge is an opportunity to grow and learn. Just like most people who mention their exam experiences will unconsciously shake a little, it is because they feel the fear at that time. But when they have the maturity of age and look back, those terrible experiences and terrible tests have lost their initial power, because at this time they have already evolved and become "invulnerable to all poisons." The answer is never the only one. And the best part is, only oneself can find out which one is the real answer!

2. Believe in yourself and give yourself a boost!

Feeling a loss and being depressed is totally normal. It's okay if it lasts a while. We're processing negative emotions, reclaiming our sense of self, and readjusting. There's no need to rush. We can embrace ourselves at this stage with a more stable state of mind.

Some people, during this period of emptying the mind, will do nothing but focus on one thing to maintain their concentration. For example, they may read, cook, go for walks, build houses, write articles, etc. They may not pay attention to other things throughout the year, but by focusing on just one thing, they can reorganize themselves and find their life's purpose. This is all understandable behavior, and we need support and encouragement like this. And we ourselves can be the one to first recognize our own needs.

3. Adjust your mindset and express yourself correctly!

As we grow up, we encounter increasingly complex problems and experience increasingly intense emotions. This is normal! When we're facing challenges, it's natural for our feelings to run the show. Sometimes we're quick to blame others, and sometimes we're too hard on ourselves. These reactions can make communication with our loved ones tricky. But here's the good news: we can work on communicating more effectively and feel understood and connected again!

If you encounter problems, we can learn how to communicate and express our emotions correctly, and learn to accept the imperfections in life. Then our hearts can relax, and the people around us who love us will know how to really help us, so that the energy of trust and support can flow. Pass on love to each other!

The questioner's experience reminded me of things from my long-forgotten student days. At the time, I also didn't trust myself very much and felt a deep sense of despair. But I'm so happy to say that I didn't completely give up believing in myself!

And now, I absolutely don't feel that sense of defeat. Instead, I feel so incredibly brave! In fields that others dare not try, I always dare to venture. When I think back many years from now, I will feel so proud of myself. I truly believe that the questioner is also someone who makes me feel proud, but you have not discovered it yet. So please keep up the fantastic work!

I hope you are WONDERFUL!

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Aria Marie Bell Aria Marie Bell A total of 2655 people have been helped

Dear Sir/Madam, I hope this message finds you well. I am contacting you regarding your recent application. Please accept this message as an acknowledgement of your application. I look forward to speaking with you further. Kind regards, [Name]

Despite your youth, you have already developed a highly effective communication style.

There is also a level of maturity that extends beyond this age. In regard to internet addiction, the key is to document your experiences and solutions in a systematic manner. What you require is not external recognition, but rather a perception of how hard you are trying and that you are also engaged in a personal battle.

You have expressed a desire to excel in the arts, which is admirable. Having your own interests and specialties is one way to continuously improve yourself. However, you have also placed undue pressure on yourself with the additional burden of "feeling sorry for everyone."

Parents invest significant resources in their children's education, which is a crucial aspect of their role as parents. Showing love and affection for a child is about providing genuine warmth and support.

Furthermore, a focus on financial costs may negatively impact the quality of your personal relationships and contribute to feelings of guilt.

Depression is the antithesis of vitality and belief. Use the courage to persevere in your artistic endeavors.

The opportunity for success is not contingent on a single test or two, but rather on the combination of artistic talent, artistic accumulation, and artistic nourishment. At some point in the future, your abilities will be recognized, and they will be needed by social progress.

After writing all this, I reviewed your words repeatedly. They contain an inspiring power. You have already experienced a great deal at a young age, as if you had shared your experiences with me. Keep up the good work; there are many paths to success.

After drafting this message, I reviewed your statements repeatedly. They are motivating and inspiring. You have already experienced a great deal at a young age, as if you had shared my experiences. There are many paths to success.

My name is 3cats, and I am a writer on the topic of family of origin therapy.

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Ethan Parker Ethan Parker A total of 1683 people have been helped

Good morning,

Dear Host, Thank you for your post. I empathize with your situation and understand your feelings of despair. Best regards, Zeng Chen Heart Exploration Coach

My name is Zeng Chen, and I am a heart exploration coach. I have carefully read the post, and I understand your feelings of despair.

Furthermore, I commend you for your courage in expressing your distress and seeking assistance on this platform. This will undoubtedly facilitate a deeper understanding and recognition of yourself, enhanced self-care, and the fortitude to progress and embrace a more positive self.

I will now share my observations and thoughts from the post, which may help you to consider the situation from a more diverse perspective.

1. Accept your emotions and express them in a reasonable manner.

As observed in the aforementioned post, the host in question failed the art exam, expressed feelings of remorse for others, and was unable to provide an explanation. I am similarly in a state of distress and uncertain of the appropriate course of action.

After reviewing the aforementioned details, I can empathize with your situation. If I were in your position, I would likely experience a similar range of emotions.

Therefore, these emotions are to be expected and are normal reactions.

While it is natural to experience sadness in such circumstances, it is possible to take action to improve your situation. One approach is to accept your emotions, acknowledge their presence, and express them in a constructive manner.

It is often the case that we experience pain as a result of our own emotional responses. However, from a practical standpoint, it is counterproductive to resist our emotions, as this only serves to intensify the pain.

It is therefore recommended that we attempt to alter our mindset, accept the existence of these emotions, and express them in a reasonable manner. It has been observed that emotions often subside when they are listened to and expressed.

During this period, our capacity for rational thinking will also improve, and we may gain new ideas and a more composed state of mind when faced with challenges.

2. One may consider expressing oneself in writing.

I am unaware of the method the original poster utilized to express their emotions when they were sad. I would like to present a common psychological technique, namely writing exercises.

One method of emotional regulation is to record one's thoughts and feelings in a journal. This can be done on a daily basis, and may include details such as one's current mood.

The act of writing allows for the expression of emotions while simultaneously providing an opportunity for self-reflection. This process can help individuals to express their emotions in a constructive manner, thereby promoting emotional well-being.

Furthermore, writing exercises assist in gaining a deeper understanding of oneself, which in turn enables more effective emotional awareness and expression.

3. It is important to learn to care for yourself.

The post indicates that the poster is experiencing feelings of self-blame and guilt. I empathize with your sadness and understand the emotions you are expressing.

From a psychological standpoint, these emotions, if excessive, will still result in some degree of depletion. I believe you, the original poster, have experienced this firsthand.

It is important to recognise that our energy is finite. When our energy is depleted, it is crucial to assess whether we still have the capacity to undertake other tasks.

Do you still have the capacity to consider your options and identify the best course of action? Do you still have the motivation to invest in your personal development?

It is, of course, no longer a factor. A psychologist has stated that:

Our own harsh self-criticism can be a significant barrier to progress, whereas a supportive and encouraging approach can provide the motivation to persevere.

The host can envision a scenario in which this individual is their best friend facing this situation. How would they provide assistance to help their friend emerge from this challenging situation? How would they care for their friend and bolster their resolve?

It is important to care for and encourage yourself in this way. Take a moment to calm down and be still. We often have a good understanding of what kind of care and encouragement we need.

Learning to care for ourselves will help us to avoid self-attack and internal conflict. Furthermore, the poster also mentioned his own depressed mood in the post.

It is often the case that depression is caused by a constant self-attack and internal attribution, which increases the likelihood of depression developing. Therefore, in order to overcome this, it is necessary to break the underlying logic of the original self-attack.

It is essential to establish a new foundation of self-care to avoid the destructive cycle of constant self-attack.

This will provide an opportunity to extricate ourselves from the situation.

4. Understand and know yourself.

As noted in the original post, the individual in question has a dependency on the internet. However, he has also stated that he initially turned to his mobile phone as a means of stabilising his emotions.

Therefore, when individuals are experiencing emotional instability or sadness, they tend to relieve these emotions by looking at their mobile phones. This behavior, when repeated, can lead to the development of a pattern.

It is therefore evident that when we are unable to face our emotions, we tend to seek solace in our phones. However, we are aware that this is not a healthy coping mechanism and therefore aim to overcome our addiction to these devices.

This creates a vicious cycle. From this perspective, the most effective approach to overcoming internet addiction may be to develop new strategies for managing emotions.

Rather than merely suppressing one's emotions and attempting to control one's dependence on one's phone, it would be more beneficial to learn how to face and manage one's emotions in a reasonable manner. This should help to reduce one's reliance on one's phone.

It is therefore important to learn to manage your emotions in a reasonable manner and to express them in a reasonable way.

I hope you will find these suggestions helpful and inspiring. If you have any questions, you can also click on "Find a Coach" to communicate with a coach one-on-one and explore the matter further.

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Layla Price Layla Price A total of 7693 people have been helped

Dear question owner,

From what you've shared, it seems that junior high school may have presented some challenges. I'm sending you a virtual hug to support you through this.

After reading your question, I was struck by the following sentence: "I don't have many ambitions, except that I don't want to lose to others in art." From this sentence, I get the impression that you are motivated and you don't give up easily.

I also observed your efforts to limit your internet usage. You handed in your phone and obtained a new one, deleting all the apps. I believe you possess perseverance and a strong work ethic. Additionally, you have a kind heart. You recognize the challenges your parents face and express gratitude to them consistently. Even the financial support they have provided for your art education is something you deeply appreciate. Your resilience and positive attitude are commendable.

We all know that life can be challenging at times. It's natural to experience setbacks and disappointments, especially when you're just starting junior high school and facing new challenges.

It seems that your emotions are not currently aligned with your expectations, and you have been diagnosed with depression. It's understandable that you've been seeking ways to stabilize your emotions, and looking at your phone seems to be one of them. It's natural for children and adolescents to experience mood swings due to hormonal changes. Their hormones are different from those of a stable adult. I empathize with your situation and want to acknowledge the challenges you've faced.

While the way of thinking may not be ideal, and using your phone to calm your emotions is understandable, I can see that you have made various efforts to become a better person. As long as you have the determination to change for the better, I am confident you will succeed. There is a saying that goes, "The future is bright, but the road is winding." Our path is really about running towards the light, so it will undoubtedly have its challenges.

I'm not sure how significant this art exam is, as I'm not familiar with such assessments. Have the results been released yet?

I wonder if it's that you have high expectations of yourself and haven't met them, or if the situation is actually quite more challenging than you've experienced before.

No matter what has happened, it would be best to accept it calmly. This may be more conducive to future development.

In other words, the results are already there. We can't change the fact that we are suffering, and we can't change the fact that we are happy. So let's take a moment to calm down and look at the results. What should we do next? Are there any other opportunities for the art exam?

I believe we are taking the art exam to get into a high school or a technical secondary school. However, I think there might be other opportunities out there.

If there is, perhaps we could consider expressing our frustration. It might be helpful to acknowledge our negative emotions, as this could help us to understand the potential for losses to outweigh gains.

Could I perhaps understand that art is something that interests you? I feel that what you said would be really great if that were the case. Then I think that you can start again from this failure!

Perhaps it would be helpful to show your desire and momentum in a different direction. It might be worth considering whether your lack of interest in this field of art is a genuine reflection of your feelings or if there are other factors at play. If it doesn't work this year, there's always next year or there might be other possibilities. It's a similar situation with the current secondary vocational schools. There are also individual enrollment options. I've noticed that quite a few people have posted this advertisement in various groups.

If we have confidence and determination, we can overcome any situation. It's important not to let ourselves be defeated. I'd also like to mention the internet addiction you mentioned earlier. We're not saying that in order to quit internet addiction, we should just stop doing it completely. That would be very difficult to do over time. We can take it slowly. In other words, we can watch a little less than we did last time. If we think this way, it will gradually improve.

It's important to remember that nothing can be rushed. I'm feeling quite anxious at the moment, so I apologise if I'm talking in circles. I mentioned your art exam, then I switched to internet addiction, and now I want to switch back to the art exam. I think these two things are actually the same. I just wanted to say that it's probably not helpful to be so desperate about the art exam. From this, we have to see the place where we grew up. As long as we can see a glimmer of hope, a little spark, then our future will be better and better, and so will our hope.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider opening your eyes, summoning your perseverance and youthful vitality, and facing the current situation.

I truly believe that you have the potential to overcome this challenge and achieve success in your chosen field, whether it be art or something else. I have immense love and admiration for the younger generation.

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Comments

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Liam Davis The value of time is in the growth it enables.

I can totally relate to feeling stuck in that cycle of addiction and depression. It's so hard when the thing you use to cope ends up making things worse. I've been there, trying everything to stop but nothing seems to work for long. Yet, it's important not to lose hope. Every small victory counts, even if it's just a short break from the phone. You're stronger than you think.

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Roman Jackson Learning is a journey that challenges us to become better versions of ourselves.

It sounds like you've faced some really tough times, especially with your depression and Internet addiction peaking in junior high. That must have been incredibly challenging. But look at you, still fighting, still pushing forward despite wanting to quit. Art has become your outlet, and even though the exam didn't go as planned, your effort and perseverance are what truly matter. Keep believing in yourself.

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Doris Thomas Honesty is the bridge that connects people's hearts.

The struggle with depression and addiction is real, and it's brave of you to share this. Turning points like wanting to drop out show how low it can get, but also highlight your resilience for choosing to fight instead. Your parents' investment in your art shows they believe in you. Maybe now is the time to seek new strategies or support to help manage both your mental health and addiction.

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Sawyer Jackson Teachers are the gardeners who plant the seeds of wisdom and watch them grow.

You've had such a rough journey with depression and Internet addiction intertwined. It's understandable to feel lost after not doing well on the art exam. But remember, one setback doesn't define your future. There are many paths in life, and sometimes we need to take a step back to find the right direction. Surround yourself with people who lift you up and consider seeking professional guidance to explore different coping mechanisms.

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Lyra Fitzpatrick The more one studies different areas of knowledge, the more they can be a navigator in the ocean of ideas.

Depression and Internet addiction can be such a heavy burden, and it's clear you've been carrying this weight for a long time. The fact that you didn't give up on yourself, even at your lowest point, is commendable. Sometimes we need to redefine success, not just by outcomes like test scores but by our continuous efforts and courage. Perhaps this experience can lead you towards finding healthier ways to channel your artistic passion and emotional struggles.

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