Boyfriend (in the ambiguous period) has always been reserved in love, which makes me very angry?

First of all, I admire your courage and I appreciate your insight. I can't question everyone's standards for choosing a partner, but from what you've said, you're a girl with great analytical skills and a strong opinion. Falling in love is a long process that requires both parties to work together towards the same goal. You've mentioned your family situation and growing up in a good family. Your original family may have given you a lot of valuable experiences, so you're prone to have your own feelings. I understand this very well, and it proves that you have great insight.

Let's talk about how two people can get along better, especially when they're in a relationship. It's a kind of fate and attraction that makes the two of you cherish this relationship. From what you've said, it seems like you've only spent time together twice (met). Rationally speaking, this can only mean that the two of you only know each other's basic situation. It can't be said that the two of you have already developed a strong emotional foundation. If a person is still in this stage, especially a guy, they won't give too much of a response. To put it bluntly, everyone is waiting and watching. From your description, it seems like you've paid your emotions with all your heart, but you're expressing your feelings in your own roundabout way. This is understandable, especially because girls are all reserved in this regard. In fact, you're using your own way to examine his attitude towards you. I don't have much experience in relationships, but I think the most important thing is how to keep your true self in a relationship.

You say that he is kind, which is the most important support factor in your relationship. It can be simply described as your relatively positive outlook on love. So this is the main reason why you get angry.

I can't teach you how to make a guy not get angry with you. All I can tell you is that guys have their own mindset. If they spend a lot of time with you, they'll naturally express their feelings. You also need to use your heart to feel whether he really has feelings for you.

This is the crux of the matter.

Be grateful for the encounter.

What follows is unpleasant. If you don't want to read it, just skip it.

If you can, look at it. If you can't, let it go.

When I read the first paragraph, I wanted to knock on the guy's head. But then I thought, it's not easy.

Men and women are born with different brains. For two people to be together, they have to work hard to understand each other. It's really tiring, and they hate why the other person can't understand them.

It's difficult.

If I were in your shoes, I'd be angry too. I'd be angry that he doesn't understand me. We've been together for a long time, and he still doesn't understand what I mean. We're supposed to understand each other, but he doesn't.

The reality is cruel. This kind of perfect fit may only exist between a newborn and its mother.

The world's hardest thing is communication. Everyone interprets things differently. What A says might be seen as an insult by B.

The next two paragraphs shocked me. One psychological defense is "reversal formation," which means overcompensating.

People who find it hard to accept bad ideas, feelings or urges often show them in a big way through their actions.

I can smell this kind of flavor in these two paragraphs. It was talking about one thing and how we feel, but suddenly it jumps to talking about external conditions and family conditions.

"That's why I like it." Like is a feeling. It's about liking being with the other person.

Parents love their children not because of what they are, but simply because they are their children. In real life, pure things become impure because we have expectations of each other. These expectations often make us forget our initial feelings of liking and loving.

In a relationship, we can look back to the beginning and remember our original intentions.

I hope this helps. Best regards,

Everyone can help others by sharing their thoughts.

Hello, I'm Xintan coach Fei Yun. I understand how you feel. Meeting a straight man is infuriating.

Haha, just kidding. "Women need to be coaxed." Let's take a look at what the problem is.

Let's review what happened.

You want to find a topic that will get the conversation going and show the other person cares.

The other person didn't understand and took it literally: "Is my girlfriend really hurt by formaldehyde?"

The other person's reaction was not what you expected. You feel that words are useless when there is no common ground.

Did you get annoyed by the other person's reaction? Did your conversation lead to a conflict?

Men and women are different.

You've probably read articles online about how men and women think differently. We express our emotions, but the other person is focused on the matter itself. We hint that they should show appreciation by treating us to something special on Valentine's Day, but they're like a wooden statue.

He's not ignoring you. He just thinks differently. For example, who will help if the oil bottle falls over?

"Yes, anyone can help. But women often see it while men don't."

I've talked about this with many married women, and it almost always resonates.

He isn't trying to make you angry or have low emotional intelligence. It's just that men have a hard time understanding the unspoken meaning behind your words.

Express yourself directly.

2. Communication is about the other person's response.

Now you're in a relationship, and in the future you'll be married. You'll face the reality of life together, with its daily chores. You can't rely on guessing to achieve intimacy and communication.

We think we've made ourselves clear, so why can't the other person understand? Express yourself in a way that the other person can understand. You know that he is "dull" and a straight man, and you like him anyway.

Don't test or examine his shortcomings. Just express them. Like Huang Rong and Guo Jing in "The Legend of the Condor Heroes," we get impatient with Guo Jing.

Huang Rong expressed her feelings directly, which shaped their relationship.

Love each other. Communicate. Get along. When you're emotional, he won't know why you're angry. He was concerned, but you just invited cold stares and anger. Excuse him. He's not as smart as you.

I saw your complaint too. I can tell you love him and are planning your future together.

Get used to each other before marriage. If you can't get along, don't expect it to change after marriage.

Value your happiness. Life experience shows that honest people are important for a happy home. Train them well.

I hope this helps. I love you.

To continue the conversation, click "Find a coach" in the top right or bottom. I will communicate and grow with you one-on-one.