Can't sleep, can't control anxiety, feel there is no hope for the future, what to do?

You say you haven't been sleeping well. You keep playing with your phone and can't help but put off going to sleep. This has led to a habit of staying up late and getting up late. Your surroundings are not quiet, and you are sensitive to noise. You have shallow sleep, so it is always difficult for you to fall asleep.

From your description, it's clear that you haven't been sleeping well recently. You have a series of associations that are making you feel bad and become very irritable when you don't sleep for seven hours straight.

If you don't get enough sleep, you'll have physical problems, poor academic performance, and you won't be able to exercise. This creates a vicious circle where you feel like you can't do anything right, that you don't have any strengths to show for yourself, and that you're the only person in the world who's fallen so low.

Beliefs like yours are limiting beliefs, plain and simple. It's not a given that not getting enough sleep for seven hours will cause physical problems, hinder your studies, or prevent you from exercising.

You're not good at nothing. You don't have any outstanding skills.

You need to ask yourself: are you the only person in the world who is so depraved? Is that really the case?

There has to be another possibility.

You need to change your mindset, find your own resources, and identify your strengths and highlights.

If you keep playing with your phone and don't sleep, you're giving yourself space and time to be yourself. Explore your inner needs.

Take it slow and give yourself time to adjust. You've got this!

Good morning,

Sleep is a significant factor that impacts both physical and mental well-being. When sleep quality is compromised, it can lead to various health issues, negative affect, and impaired functioning in various contexts. This is a cause for concern.

Let us examine methods for promoting optimal sleep and alleviating anxiety.

The objective of this investigation is to ascertain the root cause of the subject's anxiety.

Anxiety may not always be caused by the facts themselves, but rather by one's perception of them.

Let us ascertain the veracity of this claim.

You assert that you never obtain sufficient sleep and believe that you require seven hours of sleep to achieve optimal quality. Otherwise, you believe that your body will inevitably suffer adverse effects.

Therefore, it can be stated that despite experiencing periods of light sleep and difficulty falling asleep, an individual may actually sleep for more than six hours per day.

It is unclear whether my speculation is correct.

Your perception of the facts is that a lack of at least seven hours of sleep will inevitably result in adverse health effects, impaired academic performance, and limited physical capacity. This cyclical mindset can lead to feelings of inadequacy, as if you are the only individual facing these challenges.

Firstly, the use of the word "must" throughout the text implies a causal relationship that is too absolute.

Indeed, some experts have conducted experiments and found that people can be guaranteed to be full of energy if they sleep for five hours a day. It has been demonstrated that not getting enough sleep, less than seven hours, does not actually have such a significant impact on the body.

It is important to note that the number of hours slept per day varies from person to person and that the most crucial aspect is one's personal comfort.

Secondly, the effects you have described are particularly severe. You may wish to discuss these thoughts with friends and colleagues to gain their perspective.

In my estimation, this conclusion is not reasonable. The fact that one is unable to sleep well does not signify that everything is over.

It is recommended that the subject engage in a discussion with a friend to ascertain whether their views on the quality of their sleep and its impact on them are indeed unreasonable. It is postulated that these unreasonable thoughts are the root cause of the subject's uncontrollable anxiety.

The anxiety-induced worry about sleep will exacerbate the quality of sleep. It is recommended that the perception of sleep and the impact of poor sleep on oneself be adjusted, as this may effectively relieve the anxiety.

It is recommended that the quality of sleep be improved.

Difficulty falling asleep and shallow sleep can indeed be annoying. If this persists over a long period of time, it can have a definite impact on one's life. The following tips may be helpful to consider:

1. Relaxation is the optimal method for coping with poor sleep quality. It is essential to accept the situation and adopt a tranquil mindset.

It is recommended that individuals go to bed when they are tired and engage in other activities when they are not tired. It is also advised that they refrain from counting the number of hours they sleep daily and instead adopt a more relaxed approach. They should simply go to bed when they are tired and wake up to resume their daily activities.

2. It is important to create an optimal sleeping environment. Individuals who are sensitive to noise and have shallow sleep are more susceptible to being easily disturbed.

It is therefore recommended that a quiet and undisturbed sleeping environment be created.

3. It is advisable to refrain from retiring to bed if one is not sleepy. The bed is intended for the purpose of sleep, therefore it is important to ensure that no other activities are conducted in bed except sleep. This will facilitate the association of the bed with sleep, which will result in the sensation of sleepiness upon entering the bed.

4. If one is unable to fall asleep, it is advisable to get up and refrain from forcing oneself to sleep.

5. Engage in physical activity during the day to expend excess energy.

6. It is advisable to reduce stress levels, as difficulty in falling asleep can be caused by chronic emotional tension and excessive stress.

It is recommended that you attempt to relieve your stress.

It is my hope that the aforementioned information will prove beneficial.

It is recommended that you get a good night's sleep.

Good morning, question asker!

From reading your account, I can sense that you may be feeling some anxiety.

I would be delighted to walk you through this, and I hope it will be enlightening for you.

1. It might be helpful to recognize our automatic thinking.

You have mentioned that you feel that staying up late and getting up late may have an impact on your health, your ability to study effectively, and your overall well-being.

It's possible that a minor issue with sleep habits could potentially lead to feelings of self-worthlessness and a sense of being degraded.

Perhaps we could call this our automatic thinking.

It appears that there may be a cause-and-effect relationship between A and D, with the result being a lack of ability to perform well.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider that this may not be the case.

It is not uncommon for people to stay up late or have less-than-optimal sleep habits. However, many of them manage just fine.

You may also feel that getting seven hours of sleep is important for you.

If it is important to you, perhaps you could consider ways of improving your situation rather than becoming anxious about it.

It might be said that anxiety can sometimes make our feelings and thoughts more intense.

If I might humbly offer my perspective, I believe that our thoughts can often limit us.

I believe that we often create our own problems.

It may be because our beliefs are different.

Perhaps we could consider loosening our beliefs a bit at this time. It seems there is no research to prove that not sleeping well is definitely harmful to the body or that you won't learn well, etc.

Perhaps we could consider that these are just thoughts.

Premier Zhou Enlai was known to only sleep three to four hours a day, yet he was still full of energy every day, working hard for the country.

Perhaps if we were to focus less on our problems, we would feel more relaxed and sleep better. What do you think?

2. It may be helpful to recognize your anxiety and understand yourself better, and to consider making some small changes.

If we pay attention to our sleep but find ourselves wanting to play with our phones a little longer, we may unintentionally form the habit of going to bed and waking up late.

While late bedtimes and early mornings are not inherently problematic, they can contribute to feelings of inadequacy and result in less restful sleep, which in turn may lead to mood swings and irritability.

You may find it helpful to identify the root of your anxiety.

It's not uncommon to feel anxious about anxiety itself.

It's worth noting that there is a potential for a vicious cycle to develop when we have trouble sleeping. The more we experience difficulties in this area, the more anxious we may become, which in turn can further disrupt our sleep.

This may help to break the vicious cycle.

You may find that by trying to see your anxiety and understand yourself, you can break this cycle.

For instance, it might be helpful to allow yourself to feel comforted by the realization that your sleep patterns have been somewhat disrupted recently.

Perhaps it would be best to take it slow and adjust to it gradually.

If you find yourself wanting to play with your phone at night, you might consider setting an alarm and turning it off after playing for a while.

You might also consider listening to music or meditating to help you fall asleep.

It is perfectly fine if you do not fall asleep right away.

You might consider reviewing what you learned during the day, sorting things out, etc.

If you are truly unable to sleep, it might be helpful to use that time to prepare for the next day.

It would be beneficial to find a way that suits you.

Mr. Li Songwei suggests a method of incremental change, suggesting that while we all desire significant transformation, attempting to achieve it all at once can lead to increased stress and anxiety.

It might be helpful to consider making a small change each day.

As a suggestion, you might consider going to bed ten minutes earlier than you did the previous day.

It might be helpful to allow yourself to make three steps forward and two steps back in the process of change.

In this way, we may find ourselves unknowingly moving away from feelings of anxiety and towards a focus on the present moment.

Please take your time to explore what suits you best.

If you feel so inclined, please feel free to share these.

I wish you the very best!

Dear question asker, My name is Evan.

From the description provided by the questioner, it is evident that the questioner has recently been experiencing difficulties in obtaining sufficient quality sleep. Poor sleep patterns can have a detrimental impact on the questioner's physical and mental well-being, impairing their ability to concentrate on their studies. To maintain optimal health and wellbeing, sleep is a crucial element.

The quality of the sleeper's sleep is affected by certain unhealthy sleeping habits that impede the ability to obtain a good night's rest. When these poor sleep habits become ingrained as part of one's routine, they can hinder the quality of sleep.

I would like to offer the original poster some encouragement.

In light of the questioner's suggestion on the platform, I will provide some straightforward recommendations in response to the question:

It is important to create a suitable environment for sleeping.

It is essential to create a quiet and comfortable environment in your bedroom. The bedroom or sleeping area must be as comfortable and calming as possible. It is recommended to focus on the comfort of the bedroom and use the bed only for sleeping and a little reading.

It is recommended that you refrain from eating, studying, watching TV, texting, or paying bills in bed. This will help you sleep better and longer.

If you are experiencing noise in your sleeping environment, we recommend utilizing white noise, such as the sound of rain, to mask other distracting sounds.

Do not force yourself to fall asleep; instead, wait until you feel sleepy. Should you be unable to fall asleep within 20 minutes, it is recommended that you get up and engage in a relaxing activity.

It is recommended that you establish your own routine.

It is essential to establish a consistent daily routine. Establish a regular schedule for bedtime and wake-up time.

It is recommended that you go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, including on weekends. Adherence to a consistent sleep schedule on weekends as on weekdays will result in gradual improvement in your energy levels and enhanced ability to concentrate on academic pursuits. Achieving commendable academic outcomes will further contribute to an increase in your overall energy levels.

From the description provided by the questioner, it is evident that the questioner's work and rest schedule is not guaranteed. It is recommended that, where possible, the questioner ensures they get sufficient sleep.

As a preliminary step, you may wish to consider arranging some activities for weekend mornings with a view to motivating yourself to get up early. One possible option would be to plan an early morning hike with friends.

It is advisable to avoid scheduling activities for Friday or Saturday nights when developing a regular routine. Once a regular routine is established, it will not affect your energy level to get up 1-2 hours later, resulting in increased energy for the remainder of the day.

It is essential to ensure that you get sufficient sleep.

The amount of sleep required varies with age. Most adults require 7–9 hours of sleep per night, while teenagers require 8–11 hours. It is important to organize your sleep according to your age and ensure that you get enough sleep.

It is my recommendation that you take a nap for approximately 30 minutes at noon, but no longer. Otherwise, it will affect your sleep at night. If you continue the napping routine, even if you go to bed late at night, you will still have plenty of energy the next day.

It is important to manage stress effectively.

As evidenced by the original poster's account, anxiety about sleep can cause stress, which in turn impairs focus and contributes to a stress cycle. Reducing or controlling daily stressors can improve sleep quality and help treat insomnia.

The individual inquiring may require significant lifestyle modifications to alleviate stressors. It is important to embrace change.

It is important to manage your time effectively. Set aside a specific time to use your phone and reduce the time you spend on it before going to bed.

It is beneficial to discuss your concerns with friends and family. If you do not have a support system in place, it is recommended that you maintain a journal to document your feelings and emotions.

It is recommended that you engage in physical activity after dinner.

Following the evening meal, it is recommended that you engage in some light exercise. This should be undertaken at a comfortable pace and may take the form of a half-hour walk. The Dietary Guidelines for Chinese Residents advise that individuals should walk a minimum of 1,000 steps per day.

If you are not inclined to exercise, you may wish to consider listening to some light music while strolling on campus.

If you engage in rest after dinner, you may find yourself with excess energy at night, making it more challenging to fall asleep. Dusk is an optimal time for a walk, as it can help reduce stress and align your body's natural rhythms. If you experience feelings of loneliness, seeking the company of a friend can be beneficial.

Do not force yourself to sleep.

If the questioner is unable to sleep at night due to tossing and turning, it is important to avoid forcing oneself to sleep. While maintaining a regular sleep routine is beneficial, it is crucial to allow the body to naturally transition into sleep without forcing it.

Instead of remaining in bed, get up and engage in a relaxing activity, such as reading or listening to music. In short, perform an activity that you find relaxing. When you start to feel tired, attempt to return to sleep.

In psychology, there is a phenomenon that indicates a lack of success when one attempts to force a particular action. Therefore, it is advisable to avoid forcing oneself to go to sleep.

When you are unable to sleep, it is advisable to engage in activities that will distract you from your thoughts, but avoid those that will attract your attention and cause excitement. This includes watching short videos, playing computer games, or binge-watching TV series. From a biological perspective, these activities with bright light are not conducive to falling asleep.

It is recommended that you relax before going to bed. Avoid looking at related electronic products. Reading is an effective way to relax. Otherwise, it is difficult to fall asleep when exposed to bright light, which affects hormone secretion in the body. If you still cannot sleep after trying some of the above methods, you may wish to consider taking some food or medicine before going to bed, or visit a professional doctor at a hospital.

I hope this information is helpful to the questioner.

Hello, host. I'm confident my answer will be helpful to you.

As a full-time mother, I was in a bad state for one reason: I would wait until my child fell asleep at night, then drag myself out of bed and stay up late playing with my phone. The next day, I slept in until 10 a.m. I did a little bit of work, then it was lunchtime. I was in a bad mood because I slept in. After lunch, I took my child for a nap, and I slept until after 4 p.m. Then I did a little work, and it was time to eat dinner again. After dinner, I took my child for a walk, and when we got home, we washed up separately, and the cycle started again.

At that time, my state was very similar to yours. I was tired of feeling like sleep affected every aspect of me because I didn't get a good night's rest. I couldn't get anything done all day long and felt dazed. Once, because I was really in a bad state, my child dragged a bag with my phone in it, and the phone slipped out because the bag had been torn from friction with the ground. However, I didn't notice at all, and the phone was just like that picked up by someone else and never found.

I decided I had to make changes and not repeat this state of affairs.

You must adjust by sleeping.

Rise early, sleep early.

If you wake up early and don't get enough sleep during the day, you'll naturally want to go to bed early at night. I insist on getting up at 6:40 every morning, and I find that between 6:40 and 10:00, I've already completed the activities of the previous day. This period is very efficient, whether you're listening to books, exercising, reading, or writing.

You will feel a sense of accomplishment and see the benefits of getting up early, which will encourage you to get up early. By noon, you will let yourself sleep for about an hour because you really feel a bit sleepy after getting up too early, and then you will continue to do things that make you feel happy after recharging your batteries.

At night, after 10 o'clock, put your phone in airplane mode, set an alarm for the next day, and don't touch your phone again. Enter the immersive skin care and bathing phase, and then go to bed and sleep peacefully.

Once you get into the habit of doing this, you'll get enough sleep every day. It's also more in line with the laws of our body. If you want to play with your phone, there's plenty of time during the day. I now play with my phone at noon. I was tired in the morning, so noon is the perfect time to relax.

2. You can change. Encourage yourself.

If we keep denying ourselves and thinking that something must be wrong with our bodies, that we can't learn well anymore, or that we can't exercise, we'll remain stuck in a vicious circle, feeling that we can't do anything right. If we want to change for the better, if we want to have something to show for ourselves, if we want to stop falling apart, we need to believe in ourselves and encourage ourselves, not doubt and attack ourselves.

Believe you can change, and you will.

3. We must recognize that sleep has an impact on our lives, but it is not absolute. We can adjust our perception of sleep and add small things that make us feel good every day to achieve a sense of accomplishment and small joys.

One night of poor sleep does not affect our activities the next day. Two days ago, I also did not sleep well. When I woke up, I felt unmotivated and anxious, thinking that there was still a lot to do.

I made some adjustments later on because I knew that the three parts of a person's cognition, emotions, and behavior are closely linked. They are like gears that click together. As long as one of them moves, the other two will definitely move together.

I planned to make adjustments at the behavioral level. First, I did some mindfulness meditation to fill myself with confidence. Then, I did the laundry. After that, I changed the water for the little turtle, watered the flowers, and mopped the floor.

Once I've tidied up the house, I feel physically and mentally relaxed, and I feel a sense of accomplishment. My mood brightens up.

I remembered reading the book "Cognitive Therapy (Basic and Applied)" before, and there was a chapter on "behavioral activation" that mentioned: For depressed patients, one of the most important initial goals is to arrange activities. It is crucial for patients to engage in activities that were previously sources of accomplishment, pleasure, and well-being. Instead of withdrawing from activities, patients should take the initiative to participate in activities that will enhance their sense of well-being.

It's true that when we're in a bad mood, it's tempting to sit around "daydreaming." But this just feeds into a bad cycle that makes us feel worse. If you can do small things that increase your sense of achievement and pleasure, you'll find that your mood will slowly improve. I did that very thing that morning, and I'm here to tell you it works.

You should think about it. Doing those things will give you a sense of achievement and pleasure. Increase these activities in your life as much as possible, and your state will improve.

I am confident that the above will be helpful. Best wishes!

Hello, my name is Yiya Tree, and I would be honored to accompany you as you navigate your current challenges.

I can sense the distress and helplessness caused by your inability to sleep. From your description, it seems that the reason you stay up late is because you don't want to go to bed early. This could be a potential turning point in breaking your vicious cycle.

Perhaps we could try to understand why you are less willing to go to bed early every night.

There are a number of reasons why someone might choose to delay going to sleep. I have listed these reasons below for your reference:

You may wish to have more personal time and space for yourself. Going to sleep can feel like the end of the day, and when you open your eyes, it's a new day, which can mean having to get back to work and losing your freedom. Perhaps you don't want to go to bed so early because you don't want to face the next day so soon. You may wish to have more time alone for yourself, and playing with your phone to delay going to sleep may just be a way of resisting work life.

It might be helpful to consider your personal habits with regard to your biological clock. For instance, if your body type is such that you are more energetic and alert in the evening, it may be challenging to fall asleep if you are told to go to bed early. I also have this type of body type, so I can empathize with the difficulties people with this type of body type may face.

It seems that you are experiencing some concerns about your ability to sleep well. Given that you mentioned in the beginning of your text that you haven't been sleeping well recently, it's possible that you may have had some difficulties with sleep in the past, even before you started using your phone to delay going to sleep.

It's possible that you feel like you don't have control over your sleep, and that if you don't sleep well, it might have an impact on your studies, physical health, and mood. It's understandable that this could make you feel fearful and anxious. It can be challenging to relax and sleep when you're feeling this way.

How might one break this vicious circle?

Perhaps it would be helpful to gain a more diverse understanding of the matter of sleeping. Our bodies have a remarkable ability to regulate themselves, and they are highly adaptable. It's unlikely that they will collapse just because you haven't been sleeping well for a while. Many of the problems caused by sleeping problems are caused by staying up late for a long time. It might be beneficial to adjust your perception of sleeping, which could help to reduce your unnecessary psychological burden of worrying too much.

Secondly, in order to break a vicious cycle, it is often helpful to accept the worst outcome first, in order to detach ourselves from negative emotions.

For instance, I previously dealt with my fear of insomnia by allowing myself to not sleep that night. I ceased dwelling on the potential consequences of not getting sufficient rest. When you continuously think about the potential consequences, it can be challenging to relax, and if you can't relax, it might be more difficult to fall asleep.

At that time, I made a decision to try to not be afraid of not being able to sleep. If I can't sleep, I can't sleep. It's not like the sky is going to fall. Even if I have some problems if I don't sleep well, I'm willing to take those problems on, rather than being anxious and afraid of it.

When I think this way, I find it helpful to separate myself from my insomnia and anxiety, which then allows me to fall asleep.

I believe it is important to address insomnia. One key step in doing so is learning to accept the worst-case scenario, as this can help you relax.

Finally, we should revisit the reasons for your late sleep, as I mentioned at the beginning. You may wish to consider which of these reasons you feel you relate to most. Whatever the reason, it is important to recognise that your recent studies and life pressures may be affecting your sleep. I hope you will consider seeking professional help to reduce your stress and regulate your life a bit. This could be beneficial for your mental and physical health.

I hope these thoughts on your question are helpful. I wish you well and hope you can find a way to lead a healthy, easy life.

Hello! I can see that you are anxious because you haven't been sleeping well recently, and you have even begun to feel a little negative about yourself, feeling like you have fallen. This kind of experience is really troubling. But you can change it! Let's give it a try!

⭕️I'm ready to take action! How can I make this go away?

If the distress you feel because of this matter starts to spread, what amazing things can you discover if we first hold back such anxious feelings and look at actions other than emotions?

Have you ever made even a short-term change in your actions? If not, what are the obstacles? If you have, what were the possible causes of failure? We can do more! After all, electronic products are very mentally taxing and can really become a sleeping disorder. Think about it, what can you do to make even the slightest change? For example, can you replace the same amount of time with a book to read by the bedside, or do one minute

❓Have you ever made even a short-term change in your actions? If not, don't worry! There's no need to fret. We can help you identify the obstacles that might be holding you back.

If so, what are the possible causes of failure?

Absolutely! We can do more. After all, electronic products are very mentally taxing and can really become a sleeping disorder. Think about it, what can you do to make even the slightest change?

For example, you could replace the same amount of time with a book to read by the bedside, or do one minute of plank support, etc.! You can even do this even if it means spending one day looking at your phone and one day doing something else. Another example is exercising during the day to break a sweat and make yourself feel physically tired. You can start with even the smallest changes!

⭕️Absolutely! Try regulating anxiety with cognitive changes.

You know that you will feel irritable if you don't get enough sleep for seven hours. What is that irritability? Are you a little worried that poor sleep will affect your mental or work efficiency? Well, you can do something about it!

Absolutely! We can absolutely solve the problem of rest. Even if you can't sleep, you can still rest well. We can maintain a good sleeping posture, take deep breaths, close our eyes without forcing ourselves to fall asleep, listen to some meditation music, empty our minds, and rest well.

❗️"Not being able to sleep doesn't affect my rest." - You can absolutely alleviate sleep anxiety by regulating your emotions with this new understanding!

⭕️ Focus on the positive!

You are a little worried that you can't do anything well, that you will achieve nothing and have no future. This is actually an exaggeration of its impact under the influence of anxiety. But guess what? You can do anything you set your mind to! Think of one thing that made you feel happy recently.

I bet you can think of at least one thing that has given you a sense of satisfaction recently! And I bet you can think of at least one thing that has given you a sense of accomplishment recently too!

Absolutely! You can focus on things like this. Think about what you can do to keep them from happening, rather than selectively filtering out the positive aspects.

In short, focus more on the things that make you feel relaxed and at ease, and focus on the role that bad things play in increasing your self-awareness, so that the positive can continue and the negative can become positive too!

⭕️ Of course, if you have made a lot of effort, but your anxiety is still getting worse, then remember to seek help from a professional counselor!

I'm sure you'll get rid of your troubles soon and move forward with a light heart!