Did he reconsider after thinking it through, and does this make me dominant in a relationship?

Good day, I have a question for you.

You are both 22 years old, you ended your relationship four months ago, and you recently reconciled. You both desire to resume your relationship. This indicates that you both still have feelings for each other and that there is a foundation of love between you, which is a positive indicator.

You have indicated that your boyfriend has a grievance regarding an incident from the past. Could you please elaborate on the specifics of this issue?

Are you aware of this information, or was it conveyed to you by your partner?

Was this also the reason for the dissolution of the relationship?

In a relationship, there is no such thing as being inferior or passive, regardless of who makes the concessions. Concessions are made because of a genuine desire to accommodate the other person. This is an indication of tolerance or acceptance, and it is an expression of love.

You have indicated that you consider yourself to be strong. Could you please provide examples of how you demonstrate your strength? Do you engage in condescending speech or actions that do not consider the feelings of others?

If you truly embody strength, I would be honored to offer you a hug. It is not your fault that you have developed a tendency to be strong and resilient.

Your upbringing has instilled a sense of strength in you, which may have resulted in a lack of security. Among the six major needs of women, a sense of security is a primary concern, preceding care, understanding, respect, loyalty, and consideration.

To be frank, if a young woman behaves in a dominant manner, it is either because she has been influenced by her mother in her family of origin, or she is attempting to disguise her vulnerability behind a facade of strength. If you can identify your own vulnerabilities, your boyfriend's care and consideration may help you to become more open.

If you wish to modify your assertive demeanor, it is recommended that you employ non-violent communication techniques. Avoid communicating with your boyfriend in a tone of distrust, refrain from making definitive statements, and refrain from using accusatory, complaining, angry, or intense tones when speaking. Instead, utilize declarative sentences. If the other person has done something wrong and made you uncomfortable, you can say, "I regret or am angry about your xx behavior."

"Instead of "I'm very disappointed in you" or "Why are you like this?"

Your ability to ask questions, reflect on yourself, and pursue growth is indicative of positive progress. It also demonstrates your aspiration for a high-quality emotional life.

In the course of your future relationship, it would be beneficial to communicate more with your boyfriend, listen more to your inner voice, express your needs, and reveal a little more of your vulnerability. It is important to allow your boyfriend to feel his sense of presence and indispensable status in your heart and life. The more genuine you are, the less powerful you will seem to others, and the more they will feel that you need to be cared for and loved.

Your path to a happy life begins with embracing your femininity.

I wish you the best in your future relationship.

I am your guiding light, and I love you.

Hello, sweet girl!

It's been four months since you and your boyfriend broke up, and you're thinking about getting back together. He's a little worried that your personality is too strong, so you're going to give the two of you a chance and wait until he turns 25 to make a decision after he's had time to think it over. However, you feel like this makes you seem passive. At the same time, a friend's reminder has also made you doubt your personality. Is it really true that you're too strong?

It's hard to make a judgment about your character without some specific examples of how you and the other person interact. From what you've said, though, I get the feeling that you're a very strong-willed girl who isn't very good at showing your vulnerable side. You said, "I don't like being passive," and being passive in a relationship is more than just being in a disadvantaged position. It's about being in a relationship at all.

We all say that being "strong" in character is essentially a kind of pretense, because we are afraid of others seeing our vulnerability. The stronger someone appears on the outside, the more vulnerable they may be on the inside. It is precisely because they cannot accept and show their true selves that in an intimate relationship, the other person will feel very tired and find it difficult to reach your heart.

If this is really the case, then a slight change in your personality may be just the thing to help improve your intimate relationship. The sad fact is that statistics show that 95% of couples who get back together will still break up again. It's not a matter of whether they've "thought it through," but rather that the reasons that caused them to break up last time still exist and have not been changed.

How can you make some changes?

First of all, I think the original poster can do some self-reflection. It'd be really helpful to think about your life experience and identify any significant events that may have shaped your beliefs. For example, have you ever had the thought that "weak people are useless, unloved, and unworthy of love"?

Second, you can try practicing self-disclosure. It's a great way to bring people closer together!

You can start by practicing self-disclosure with your most trusted close ones and the most irrelevant strangers. Close ones will make you feel understood, while strangers will slowly give you the courage to expose yourself and find a balance between self-protection and exposure.

And finally, nourish yourself with the goodness of a high-quality intimate relationship. In an intimate relationship, many people hide themselves and are afraid to reveal their true selves. They often lack confidence in themselves and the relationship they are in, and are filled with fear.

People's personalities can actually change! Even people who are vulnerable and insecure inside will continue to grow and become lovable in a good intimate relationship.

So, don't be too hard on yourself, okay?

I hope these thoughts help! Sending you lots of love!