During adolescence, not wanting to go to school and being afraid of teachers, how can parents communicate with teachers?

Good day, question asker. I can see the confusion you are facing now, and I extend my support to you.

Your question brings to mind an experience I had in high school.

At that time, my English history teacher had an unanticipated pregnancy. On one occasion when I was called upon to answer her question, I was unable to do so within the allotted time frame. As a result, she proceeded to admonish me in front of the other 20 or so students in the class.

Upon my return home from school, I informed my father that I felt my life was devoid of purpose.

Given the gravity of the situation, my mother promptly informed the school principal the following day.

However, the headmaster defended the teacher and spoke on her behalf, stating that she was pregnant and in a bad mood.

I am sharing this example to illustrate that communication with teachers is not always effective.

It would be more beneficial for you to provide your child with a strong support system. This will enable him to approach you with any concerns he may have in the future.

It is, in fact, quite challenging to alter the attitude of a teacher.

Rather than anticipating a change in the teacher's approach, it may be more beneficial to influence the child's mindset. For instance, it might be helpful to explain that the challenge may be specific to a few teachers, rather than viewing the entire teaching staff through a negative lens.

I hope that the issue you are experiencing can be resolved in an effective and timely manner.

At this time, I am only able to offer the above.

I hope my above answer is helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner. As the answerer, I am committed to studying hard every day.

Best regards, Yixinli Team

Thank you for your interest in our product.

Dear stranger,

Hello!

First and foremost, as parents, you must be there for your child. It doesn't matter how much the teacher cares about the child, it's never okay to hit or scold them.

It's always best to be gentle with children. When we scold or beat them, we're really just expressing our own emotions. Home is a child's last safe haven. If a child faces difficulties at school and their parents can't offer them a sense of security, they may feel like they have nowhere to turn.

Secondly, it's important to let your child know that no matter how the teacher treats them, school is a place to learn and grow. The most important thing is that they can learn and flourish at school. When the teacher is nice to them, they should be grateful, and they shouldn't be surprised if the teacher treats them badly.

Everyone grows up in different environments and has different perceptions. Teachers are just ordinary people, and they also have their own trivial daily lives. Their work and lives may also be full of problems, and they may vent their emotions on the relatively disadvantaged students. Very often, this kind of emotion in the teacher is not directed at the student in front of them, but is an outward manifestation of their own sense of powerlessness.

Finally, talking to the teacher may not solve the problem. It can be really hard to change ourselves, let alone change someone else!

I really hope things work out for you and your child!

Hello, I'm Gu Daoxi Feng Shou Lu, heart exploration coach.

Teachers have to deal with more than one class of students. It can be hard to give each student the care they need. As a parent, you may feel like exploding at times. Teachers have to face a classroom full of children. Try to put yourself in your child's shoes. This may help your child understand the teacher's motives.

Adolescents are becoming more aware of themselves and their need for respect. It is hard for them to accept that disrespectful behavior is normal. Parents should guide their children in understanding negative comments from others.

Ask if the teacher scolds all students and if there are any who aren't scolded. Let your child know that respect must be earned. Would the top students in the class be scolded?

This will help him respect others.

As the saying goes, "My teacher is my teacher." The teacher's scolding may not be the right way to go about it, but they want the child to do well. Understanding the teacher's feelings may help the child feel less hostile towards them.

"I like it when you can't stand the sight of me but can't get rid of me" may help the child see the teacher's scolding from a different perspective. If the child thinks, "Even if the teacher doesn't like me, he has to give me lessons," it will make the child feel better.

Help your child become more resilient. Not everyone can be as patient as parents. Give your child opportunities to exercise independently. This will help him avoid being hurt. When he is more resilient, he will be better at accepting negative information.

Read: "Burns' New Emotion Therapy," "Maybe You Should Talk to Someone."

Best wishes!

Hello, question asker!

It's true that scolding and beating won't help your child in the long run. But let's be realistic. It's not easy to expect teachers to change, and it's not realistic to expect children to understand teachers like adults.

Right? So what should I do?

The answer is in the parents!

Parents are the first people a child encounters in the world, and they have the incredible opportunity to teach their children how to get along with the world. If parents can accommodate all of their children's emotions and provide a foundation for them, then when children face the world, they will have the confidence and psychological resilience to do so!

He'll know that no matter what happens outside, he can always count on his parents to be there for him. He'll understand that it's okay to feel whatever he's feeling, and that he can express his emotions without letting them build up inside. This will help him to make better choices and to act in ways that are more in line with his true self.

And the best part is, when you accept all of your child's emotions, you're not indulging. You're simply seeing, paying attention, listening, and communicating. So, there's absolutely no need to worry about spoiling your child!

No one changes for no reason! There is always a reason. So, the aim of tolerating a child's emotions is to discover the child's needs.

For example, when your child is angry and dissatisfied, stay by his side and wait until he calms down. Then, ask him how he feels when he is angry. When your child is willing, analyze the teacher's behavior together with your child and try to see things from the teacher's perspective. Do this over and over, and your child's way of thinking will gradually mature!

I'm also a parent of a student, and I'm thrilled to share my genuine feelings with you!

Thank you so much for your question!

The situation experienced by Xiaoqiang is complex. It involves psychological development during adolescence, conflicts in values, and differences in perceptions of educational methods. In response, I have some suggestions:

First, we must address Xiaoqiang's psychological adjustment and value guidance.

Listen and understand. Take the time to listen to Xiaoqiang and understand why he is afraid of and resistant to school and teachers.

Guided by values: Make it clear to him that although some educational methods may be unsatisfactory, not all teachers are like this. Most teachers still care about their students and aim to educate them.

Teach Xiaoqiang to have a flexible mindset. Explain that in life, many things are not black and white. Sometimes, you have to compromise and adapt, but you don't have to give up your principles.

Next, regarding communication with the teacher:

You must choose the right time and method. Make an appointment with the teacher for a private meeting, face-to-face or over the phone. Avoid raising these issues in public or in an emergency.

State the purpose of the communication clearly. Before communicating, you must clarify the problem you want to solve and the desired effect. For example, you should hope that the teacher understands the situation of Xiaoqiang and discusses how to improve the teacher-student relationship.

Be clear and direct in expressing your concerns. Provide objective details about the issues you're facing, such as instances of verbal and physical abuse. Make it clear that you're concerned about the psychological impact of these actions on your child.

Seek cooperation and solutions. Meet with the teacher and discuss how to improve Xiaoqiang's situation at school. This should include seeking psychological counseling and adjusting the teaching methods.

If communication with the teacher does not achieve the desired effect or the problem persists, you should report the situation to the school management or education department for further help and support.

Dealing with these kinds of problems requires patience, understanding, and cooperation. I will guide Xiaoqiang to view the problem in the right light and communicate effectively with the teacher. We will find a solution to help Xiaoqiang out of his predicament.