Five months after giving birth, the mother and daughter-in-law wanted to end their lives. What is wrong with them?

Hello, host! I'm thrilled to answer your question. Based on the information you've shared, it seems that five months after giving birth, the mother-in-law had a lot of new demands.

No matter what you do, you can't meet his demands, which is a great thing! The mother-in-law often slanders you behind your back in front of other people, which gives you a chance to show your true colors.

A video often reposted on WeChat shows the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law because the daughter-in-law is ignorant. After the first confrontation, he became even more aggressive. Fortunately, your husband is on your side!

Once you let the mother-in-law know that you want to keep the marriage going, she gets even more extreme!

I'm ready for a change! I'm starting to doubt myself, and I'm ready for a divorce and to leave this world.

I never wanted my mother-in-law to approve of me. But my mother-in-law's practice of saying one thing to her face and something else behind her back, if I can't let go, is an explanation of my own small-mindedness, making me break out in cold sweat.

Now I get to stay up until dawn every day! How can I rebel? I don't want to be someone who pleases others; it's not the real me. Can I delete all contact information for my mother-in-law, ignore her actions, and let her smear you while you stand at the lowest point of morality?

When faced with this situation, the mother-in-law tells herself that she can go out for a walk or find a doctor, but then turns around and tells her son that spoiling his wife like this will come back to haunt him. The husband can't stand being slighted in the slightest, so he's ready to take action!

The conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law described by the questioner are common in most Chinese families. And it's easy to see why! In the past, the mother-in-law was the hostess of the family and had absolute power of speech in the family.

Once you got married and had children, you became the rightful second-generation matriarch of the family, which is a huge step forward! However, this does pose a challenge to the status of the mother-in-law. After you gave birth to your child, your experiences and your husband's experiences will focus more on the child and your little family. This is a wonderful time to focus on your little family unit! The mother-in-law may feel that her son has been taken away from her, but this is just a phase. His picky and smearing behavior is more to regain his dominant position in the original family. This is something you can work on together!

So whatever you do is wrong, and you can't satisfy your mother-in-law's demands. This is more like a political struggle, which means you have the chance to show your strength and resilience!

Luckily, your husband is on your side, which is a huge blessing! I think the best way to deal with your mother-in-law's behavior is to ignore it. Don't worry, you don't need to block all contact. Just don't respond to any messages or content your mother-in-law sends you. If your mother-in-law gets anxious, you can forward the content of the messages to your husband.

You can easily justify yourself to your mother-in-law by simply telling her that the head of this small family is your husband, and that all your actions are approved and supported by him. Make sure you push your husband to the forefront of the conflict!

Absolutely! You can discuss this with your husband first and agree on a position.

He sends you videos of conflicts between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law via WeChat, mainly about the daughter-in-law's lack of understanding. The main purpose of the mother-in-law is to project and get you to agree with her point of view. If you react strongly to these views, you will give him a handle.

If you don't comment on his views, it's like a person fighting in the air. After a while, the mother-in-law will get bored. I am happy to have an appointment with you. 1983. The world and I love you!

Dear host, I empathize with your situation based on your description. I hope that my contribution will prove beneficial to you.

It is widely acknowledged that the relationship between a mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law can be a significant challenge to navigate in the contemporary social context. It is also a factor that can contribute to the dissolution of familial bonds.

From the perspective of the mother-in-law, she hopes that her daughter-in-law will demonstrate diligence. Additionally, she may encourage her daughter-in-law to draw comparisons with other families.

He therefore feels that he is asking his daughter-in-law to do too much.

This will enable her to feel that she is taking the initiative. In this family, she still has the right to speak.

However, contemporary young people tend to espouse a distinct set of values and beliefs. When their mother-in-law refrains from exerting excessive control, they often experience discomfort and may even exhibit a desire to challenge authority.

The result is that the mother-in-law will ultimately prevail.

As previously stated in the article, you recall your husband providing support and assistance.

It is also possible to inform one's spouse of the grievances and negative emotions experienced.

One potential solution is to request that your husband communicate with his parents. Given that they are his parents, it is reasonable to expect that you would respect your son's opinion on this matter.

Indeed, the same can be done. The act of cohabitation is often the source of numerous disputes between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law.

One may inform one's husband of one's intention to rent a separate residence, thereby creating a physical distance that will facilitate a more harmonious relationship with one's mother-in-law.

As an intermediary, one can engage in discourse with one's husband regarding a multitude of issues. Despite this, one retains a significant degree of influence and the prerogative to counsel.

The following represents my analysis of the situation.

Greetings,

The hormonal changes that occur following childbirth can have a significant impact on the body and mind of the new mother. Prior concerns that may have been less pressing may now become more acute. The body is undergoing recovery, and mood swings are also common during this period.

The process of raising a child is even more mentally and physically exhausting, and maintaining a harmonious relationship with one's mother-in-law is a significant source of stress at this time.

The current situation is undoubtedly a source of significant distress. The strained relationship with your mother-in-law has reached a point where contemplating ending your own life is a tangible possibility, which speaks volumes about the extent of the anguish you are experiencing.

Your mother-in-law is unable to comprehend your emotional state, which results in considerable frustration.

Despite clear evidence that the mother-in-law is inconsistent in her statements and actions, and despite acknowledgment of the harm caused to the daughter-in-law, the latter still fails to recognize the problem. Even if the daughter-in-law sacrifices her own well-being, the mother-in-law remains indifferent.

One must therefore consider whether it is truly worthwhile to sacrifice one's own life, one's support for one's husband, and one's children, merely to satisfy the demands of another.

Many conflicts between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law arise because each side is defending its own position. The mother-in-law believes that the daughter-in-law should be grateful, while the daughter-in-law feels that the mother-in-law is assisting her husband by caring for the children, which is akin to caring for her own grandchildren. The mother-in-law has her own habits and expectations, and the daughter-in-law also has her own habits. It is not possible to please her in every way.

As long as one is at peace with one's conscience, the question of whether one is a good daughter-in-law is largely irrelevant. Even if one is performing well, the mother-in-law may still have reservations. It is not worth compromising one's own well-being to satisfy her expectations.

It is also imperative for the mother-in-law to modify her mentality. In the residence of her son and daughter-in-law, she is merely a visitor. Despite her status as the elder who has come to provide assistance, she must still demonstrate respect for the hostess. If she is reluctant to offer help, she has the option of returning to her own home.

Does your mother-in-law's attitude towards you seem familiar? Have you consistently striven to gain the recognition of a certain authority figure, yet been unable to do so, resulting in significant distress?

Similarly, during one's formative years, parents often set high expectations, frequently offering criticism and rarely providing encouragement. These experiences can lead to internalization of parental demands and a tendency to self-pressure, even in the presence of positive outcomes.

It would be beneficial to engage in self-compassion by embracing one's efforts and acknowledging the challenges overcome.

It is unnecessary to attempt to please everyone. The satisfaction or dissatisfaction of others is a matter for them to address.

Her contradictory behavior is simply a reflection of her personality. She avoids direct confrontation by resorting to indirect criticism. If she consistently displays hypocrisy, it is futile to dwell on it. She is dissatisfied with herself, and therefore, with everything.

It would be beneficial to focus on the positive aspects of life, spend time with your child, and seek support from your husband. Your immediate family is of paramount importance. If you are dissatisfied with your mother-in-law, it would be advisable to communicate with her directly. Share your observations, feelings, and expectations. It is possible that she will not change, but discussing the matter may help to alleviate your emotional distress.

I wish you the best of luck!