[Forms of Love] Are couples who don't have children in their second marriage not capable of true love?

Good morning, Thank you for taking the time to discuss this with us.

I would like to take this opportunity to share my perspective and views on this matter.

The title, "Do couples who don't have children in their second marriage not deserve true love?," initially prompted my recollection of "Goose Feather Flies Up." Despite the dissimilar circumstances, I was compelled by the conviction expressed in these words, which I found to be firmly grounded.

I responded in the negative. I believe that true love is not contingent on external conditions. My friends who are DINKs were informed from an early age that they would be content as a DINK couple in retirement.

Secondly, my cousin, whose circumstances are comparable, is also in a blended family with children from both sides, and they are just as satisfied.

In the main text, "After my second marriage, many people suggested that my teammate and I have another child, so that our relationship can be strong and our future old age life can be guaranteed." This is similar to the tone of people urging people to have a second or third child. Regardless of the life we choose to live or the decisions we make, there will always be differing opinions. These individuals use their experience to advise us and impose their views on us, not only asking us to accept them, but also hoping that we will act on them.

Every Chinese New Year, my husband's relatives will pressure me to have a second child, as if I've committed a great sin by choosing not to. That kind of atmosphere makes me feel very uncomfortable, and I will retort a few words to firmly express my determination not to have another child. In recent years, when my relatives say the usual things, I will smile and take over the conversation, just going along with them. However, I remain firm in my decision.

It's important to recognize that everyone has their own way of living. We should focus on selecting a lifestyle that aligns with our current needs and preferences, without being influenced by external pressures.

"The other day I was discussing family matters with a colleague. She abruptly informed me that my expectations of financial support in my old age were misguided. She suggested that my contributions to the household and childrearing would not necessarily guarantee such support.

One of the reasons the teacher is confused and distressed is that these words were said by her sisters. We question whether there is any truth to what they say. However, it is rare for people to enjoy the blessings of their children.

The book "The Distant Savior" presents a clear argument. As a blogger noted, raising children is a losing proposition. It is because of love that you choose to have a child, not to provide for your old age.

Additionally, an article profiles a woman who never married and, at the conclusion of her life, expressed no regrets about her decision not to wed or have children. She attributed this to having lived a life aligned with her personal preferences and aspirations.

Ultimately, it is important to recognize that not all couples begin their relationships with the same level of commitment. In some cases, individuals may enter into a second marriage without the benefit of biological children, yet still deserve the same level of affection and commitment as any other couple.

While there are instances where individuals enter into a relationship after a period of courtship, I believe that the decision of whether or not to pursue a romantic relationship is ultimately up to the individual. Each person is the best judge of whether a relationship is right for them and can make decisions about their own life.

The decision to have a child is a personal one. Regardless of whether or not you choose to have a child, it is important to enjoy the experience of a life without any conditions and to embrace the challenges and rewards that come with it. As for the relationship between husband and wife, it is important to maintain a positive and supportive dynamic. It is not necessary to adhere to the advice and expectations of others. The decision of how to spend the rest of your lives is yours to make. I wish you happiness and good health.

Hello there,

After reading your description, I can see where you're coming from and what you're thinking.

Is there really no love in a second marriage? Absolutely not. If you feel love in your heart, then it is love.

Here's my take on your second marriage.

You made a point of saying that you and your husband are both second-time married. From my own experience, second marriages are often seen as less acceptable by people who are very traditional or male-dominated. In some cases, this can even lead to a kind of moral judgement.

It seems that men are favored, which may be related to the customs of old society. For example, it is often said that second-time married men are seen as stable and mature, while second-time married women are viewed negatively as having problems and being incompetent.

First of all, it's important to understand that times have changed. Many people who are getting married for the first time are doing so not because of love, but because of peer pressure. There's nothing wrong with seeking a partner for a peaceful divorce.

People who criticize second marriages are either having problems in their own marriages or are jealous of those who choose to get married again.

Next, let's look at the topic of children.

In your description, you talk about "friendship rights and having another child with your teammate" and "a strong relationship and having someone to depend on in old age." First, let's talk about a strong relationship. This is a big problem.

If people still use their kids to maintain a strong relationship, it might just mean they're average parents. It could be a sign that they're not really doing well in their marriage and are placing their hopes on their children.

There's a lot of pressure on kids when it comes to time. Think about the above question: why slap someone in the face?

As you mentioned, you and your current friend are both in second marriages with children. Given that children are thought to strengthen emotional bonds, it seems that divorcing or remarrying would not be the best approach.

From my perspective, your relationship with your friends is more aligned with the previous generation, while your children's relationship is more in line with the next generation.

Ultimately, whether or not you need another child is a decision you should make based on the advice of your current family—that is, your friends and your four children. It's not something you should base your decision on the advice of outsiders.

Another way of looking at old-age support is pretty insulting. If you look at history, from the past to the present, you'll see that it's not really the case.

Are biological children really a source of support in old age? Not really.

Family ties are more about mutual support, which is another kind of moral coercion. In some places where son preference is strong, there are many cases where one's own biological children support their biological parents. There are also many unmarried people who adopt children and end up doing well for themselves.

It's clear that having someone to rely on in old age is just a psychological crutch for some people.

Analysis 3: Sisters

As you said, "Living together. Don't be so naive as to think that if you pay for and raise your child, someone will support you in your old age."

Take this advice to heart. If you feel like there's a rift in your marriage, it's because of this. Marriage is about living together, not just enjoying life.

It's important to understand each other. Kids aren't born knowing right from wrong. They have their own moral judgments, but they need guidance. If you run your marriage with the attitude described by the sister, you're as naive as the saying suggests. No child will support you in your old age.

This is similar to the Taoist law of cause and effect, as well as Murphy's Law.

My advice is that you treat marriage and children as two separate issues. The outcome depends on how you manage and educate them.

Instead, be careful not to let yourself be influenced by what others say about the future. When it comes to children, it's true that you get out what you put in.

To educate children, it's important to guide their consent. It's best to avoid actions like "I'm doing this for your own good." Using this can create tension in your relationship with your child and family.

Just to let you know, the above is for reference only.

Ling, I see your question and I understand your dilemma. I also sense some resentment and anger. This is just my assessment based on your expression, but I believe you may feel differently.

In conclusion, your question touches on three levels of relationships:

First, there's the issue of love and family relationships.

You and your husband are both remarried, and after experiencing the failure of a marriage, you still choose to believe in love and marriage. This is admirable. I believe you and your husband are both people of character, and you love life. This is the foundation of your relationship, so I believe your intimacy is good. Love is a fleeting passion. When love enters marriage, the relationship also changes. With more responsibility for each other, love no longer becomes the main theme of life, but may become the background of family life. This background sometimes brings you closer to experiencing the love between the two of you, and sometimes it recedes into the background, supporting family life.

It is not advisable to take care of a family, and it is even less advisable to do so in a second marriage. In your current family, there are children from your husband's previous marriage. You are doing a good job as a stepmother, but you will need to work on your relationship with the children. Dealing with the relationship with your stepchildren will also strengthen your relationship with your husband, and allow you to become "comrades-in-arms" who solve problems together.

Ultimately, whether or not to have another child is a decision that rests solely with you and your husband. If you and your husband are in agreement and have the financial means, then you have the option to have this child. However, if you do not want to, you can also choose to manage the existing family relationship in whatever way you see fit.

Secondly, we must consider the relationship between children and old age.

The concept of "raising children to prepare for old age" is outdated in today's society. Families are becoming smaller and smaller, and when their children grow up, they will form their own small families. Parents should focus on raising children to be independent and responsible for their own lives. This is the greatest success for parents. Similarly, being responsible for one's own life is also the direction we should strive for. When we enter old age, the boundaries between parents and children are often easily broken. Parents must learn to create a relationship that is both interdependent and independent. This is an important ability to continuously improve. We have life tasks to complete at each stage of life. Preparing for old age in advance in middle age is also an important task.

There are many possible solutions to this task. Relying solely on the idea of having children to provide for old age is unrealistic.

Third, it is crucial to understand the relationship between your inner and outer environment.

You should have your own ideas about whether to have children after remarriage, but this idea has been constantly challenged. Many people outside the family are advising and persuading you, and your good sister has also negated your ideas. The opinions of these people are wrong. You are not wrong. You are not rejected or misunderstood. You are angry because you feel doubted.

This clearly shows that you lack self-awareness, and external judgments make you doubt yourself.

You need to do more homework to strengthen your self-awareness, make choices that align with your wishes, and stand firm in your convictions.

You can do this! Believe in yourself!

Hello, I'm Strawberry!

The questioner and her husband are both in their second marriages. They've both been through a failed marriage, but they're still willing to believe in marriage! It shows that they've both given it a lot of thought and know what kind of life they want.

Not easily influenced, that's for sure!

I once read a quote that may seem like a joke, but it is actually the true thinking of many people. We are in a relationship of love in the evening years. Your children have grown up, and neither of us needs to help the other raise them. You and I are both retired, financially independent, and don't have to worry about who needs to support the other in their old age. We just live our lives taking care of each other, relying on each other, and being tolerant of each other. It's a wonderful thing!

The questioner didn't have any ideas in the first place, but after chatting with her sister, her sister's ideas gave her a whole new perspective. That is, the questioner and her husband must have children of their own before their relationship can go anywhere — it's an exciting step!

First of all, the question asker's sister has really gone out on a limb by saying such things. This is her opinion, not advice for the question asker. She is sharing her own thoughts with the question asker. Everyone has a different personality, different pursuits, and different ways of getting along with others. Her words can only represent herself, and her words can only be used as a reference, not something that must be implemented. Don't let the words of others affect you—you've got this!

Give yourself enough confidence!

It's not clear how old the two children of the question asker's husband are or what their personalities are like, but the question asker should do what she can! They will still be loved even if they're not the question asker's biological children. Let's not lie to ourselves. If they're not the question asker's biological children, it's impossible to raise them as if they were. Sometimes the reality is that the children know the question asker is not their mother, and no matter how good the question asker is to them, they'll still seem less close to the question asker. Just let things take their course!

Like the questioner's sister's statement that the two children of the questioner's husband are not the questioner's biological children, and when the questioner grows old in the future, it would be wonderful if they could be good to the questioner and support the questioner in his old age. It feels like the questioner's sister is taking things very literally and has also vilified both children, but there is still hope!

As the saying goes, "You reap what you sow." If the children are not grateful and do not appreciate the good that the questioner has done for them, then it can only be said that they have been affected by the problems in their parents' relationship. But there's an easy fix for that! Adults should be more aware of their hurt feelings and give them timely care and attention. When they feel the warmth, they will naturally understand the good that the questioner has done for them.

Don't bet your future on your children and expect them to give you what you want. When you have the ability to give yourself the life you want, you'll no longer be afraid of how your children treat you in the future! Strive to give yourself enough confidence, and follow your heart in everything else.

Don't be misled by perceptions!

Children are the wonderful fruit of our love, but there are so many ways to express love that don't necessarily involve having children. Children are definitely not a tool to bind a relationship. After experiencing a failed marriage, the questioner should know even better that love is cultivated with effort, not maintained by children.

From this incident, the question owner can take the opportunity to see his own problems. Obviously, he is satisfied with the status quo, but why did he panic and lose his mind when his sister mentioned it? This is a great chance for the question owner to really think about what he wants in this relationship. He can decide that he and his husband can maintain this marriage and be confident in that decision.

I'm ready to take control of my insecurities and work on building my confidence! How can I face and deal with my insecurities when I feel them?

How can you and your husband better manage your marriage? These are the questions the original poster should think about and face—and they're great questions!

There's a saying that it's better to prepare for a rainy day than to mend a broken heart after a sheep is lost. And it's so true! When it comes to marriage, preparing in advance allows us to take a more active role in managing the life we want, and it also allows us to be more confident in believing in our marriage. When faced with some problems, don't choose to ignore or avoid them because you don't think they are that big of a deal. Instead, try "The Five Languages of Love"! It's really recommended in relationships. Applying the five methods can allow us to reap the happiness we want. The question owner can try to read and learn from it, and perhaps they can find the answers they want in the book.

I really hope my answer is helpful to the questioner! Best wishes!

Hello, question asker! I'm Jia Ao Bu Xun, and I'm excited to help you!

I can see the problems and confusion you describe on the platform. You say that you and your husband are second-time married, that he has two children from a previous marriage, and that you have one child from a previous marriage. Many of your friends have advised you to have another child with your current husband, so that your relationship will be stronger and your old age will be more secure. Even your sisters have told you not to be so naive, saying that you are just living together now, and that you don't know who will support you in the future! You feel sad and confused when you hear this. You don't know how to view this issue. Do second-time married couples without children really have a reliable relationship?

It's true that everyone around you is offering advice and reminders, and even the most determined heart will inevitably waver. But you're learning how to deal with this, and you're ready to tackle the current problem head-on. You're feeling more confused and helpless, but you're also excited to figure things out!

I'm here to help you analyze and sort things out!

1. Look at the specific problems and see how you can solve them!

Your family and friends all have your best interests at heart and want to ensure your future. They want you to succeed! But remember, there are still many unhappy couples from previous marriages. You are now starting a new family together, and there are still too many uncertainties and hidden dangers. However, this still depends on the specific situation. Children cannot restrict marriage, and they cannot directly determine your marriage. But they can indeed enhance each other's sense of responsibility! Children do not exist for the continuation of life, but as a testimony of mutual love. Does this make you feel better? The two of you originally came together because of love, and it will not affect your current relationship whether or not you have children together.

2. Stand firm in your position!

You're confused and shaken by your friends' persuasive arguments, but I can tell you're still standing firm in your beliefs. That's great! The question you asked, "Are second-marriage couples not worthy of true love if they don't have any children together?" shows you've rejected that statement wholeheartedly. You're ready to be together because of love, not because of any other reason. You can follow your heart's desire, hold fast to your position, and just do what you think is right.

3. Improve communication and interaction

If you don't feel the need to raise a child together, that's okay! You can still have a great relationship. Communication and understanding are key. Talk about your problems and work through them together. You'll enjoy your life together more if you do. This way of getting along is more promising. Having a child is the icing on the cake. Not having one won't affect your relationship. It's a win-win!

4. Love needs to be maintained with care, and it's so worth it!

The best relationships are two-way, and second marriages are even more based on love! Two people who truly love each other and trust each other, who have feelings for each other and want the same thing, can work together. A couple's hearts are at home, caring for and looking after each other. Whether they contribute money or effort, they do it for the good of the family. Children are not the only way to keep each other together. Otherwise, why are there still so many divorced couples? Happiness does not depend on so many formalities, but mainly on the true emotions in each other's hearts. When the feelings are gone, there is truly nothing left—so let's make sure we keep those feelings alive!

5. You don't care too much about what others think!

All your current doubts mainly come from the persuasion and influence of your family and friends. You care too much about their opinions and comments. You are afraid that if you really don't listen to them, you can't bear the consequences. But you can! Don't be afraid to try to relax and try not to pay too much attention to other people's opinions and comments. Other people's opinions and comments can be used as a reference, but you shouldn't absolutely do what they say. You know this better than anyone else. You need to have your own judgment and ideas, and even more so your own position and decisions. If you think that doing so will make you happier, then do it as soon as possible, without hesitation or fear!

Go for it! Don't worry too much, just go your own way!

I really hope my answer helps! The world and I love you!

Hello, question asker.

I'm a therapist. Do couples without kids in their second marriage not deserve love?

Happy families are all equally happy, and unhappy families all have their own misfortunes. Marriage is a commitment of mutual trust and tolerance. It has some additional sacred and emotional moral and ethical factors. Just as one cannot live without a first love, marriage is a long-term commitment. The crystallization of love is to let both sides have a role of orientation. From a human perspective, the first marriage is full of longing and hope for love. In most cases, second marriages have children. Even if the feelings between the remarried couple are good, they also have to consider whether the other party can treat their children as their own. Then the second marriage will not be as ideal as the first marriage. From affection to affection requires a process, and this process will be reflected through distance.

It's not that couples without children don't love each other. It's more a question of reality.

My husband and I are both second marriages. He has two kids from before, and I have one.

After a man gets divorced, he is more likely to remarry if the woman can take care of him, is more serious about the relationship, and wants the other person to treat his children better. For women, it is not easy to find a partner again after getting divorced and bringing a child into the relationship. There is no guarantee that you can provide material wealth for your child. At the same time, you are worried that bringing the child along will make life difficult for both of you, so you will choose to leave the child with your ex-husband. This way, you still have the opportunity to visit and maintain the mother-child relationship. Secondly, the ex-husband will not hassle the woman too much about child support.

After the second marriage, people often suggest that the couple have another child together. The other day, I was chatting with a friend about family matters, and she yelled at me, "You two are just living together now.

Don't be naive. If you raise his kids, don't expect support in old age. After hearing her sister, she felt confused and distressed.

Couples start with love and become families. Second marriages don't have biological children and don't deserve love.

Everyone has a different understanding of second marriage. Some people want more children to win their husband's heart and make him take responsibility. They think that having no children from a previous marriage is fine. However, some people already have children. They consider the cost of raising children and the relationship between the children. Those who don't want children will think about the future of their housing and marriage.

We worry too much about who will take care of us in our old age. To be a good parent to someone else's child, both people in a remarriage must make an effort for each other. You can't guarantee that you will be taken care of in the future, even if you have a child. Parents who fulfill their obligations can make their children feel it. People are made of flesh and blood, and feelings can become family affection over time. I understand your friends who care about you and help you. Let's look at it from both sides and give you suggestions based on your situation.

There is no love or hatred without reason. If you repay kindness with gratitude, how can you repay hatred? We can think of the worst, but we must also be prepared. Leave a way out for later. As a family, we rely on and understand each other. Taking care of and loving each other's children is the right way. Harmony at home brings success. Every happy family should have this characteristic.

We all have problems. When you don't get what you want, you feel sad. When you get it, you don't know how to cherish it. This makes our lives full of pain. This is mainly because we don't know what we want and what we need.

We are all born with low self-esteem. No one is born knowing everything. When you worry about various things and lack a sense of security, you will start to daydream. You have to go out into the world to make it yours. If you don't, it will stay the same.

If you look for external causes, you'll get the same result for ten years. If you look for internal causes, you'll get a new result every day. Marriage is about tolerance, trust, accommodation, and indulgence. Instead of wanting to be like a pair of fish swimming in the same pond, treat each other honestly and live as the person you want to be.

If you can't solve a problem, leave it. If you can, work on it. Good things will come.

These suggestions are just ideas. The world connects us all. Best wishes!

Hello there!

I've often wondered if a second marriage needs a child to establish real emotions. What do you think?

It's different for everyone because we all think differently. When a first marriage doesn't work out, it's natural to have some fear and anxiety about a second marriage. It's normal to have some negative emotions, but most of them will be because of the pain of the first marriage. We might try to hide them from others, and then enter the second marriage thinking we can run a good marriage. But we might wonder if the child can make the relationship between the two more stable or more secure. I personally think that it has nothing to do with the child.

Children are a wonderful gift from God. They are flesh and blood that fall from us. Perhaps this kind of blood relationship will make the two of you feel a little lighter, or this kind of love will add some family affection, which will make our relationship become deeper. However, if the relationship between the two of you is not good, then the addition of children may not bring stability to the relationship. Of course, the choice to have children or not is our own decision. Then, if the relationship is really good, and if the two of you can manage the marriage well together without children, that is actually very good.

It's so important to have a clear understanding of marriage. And it's also vital to remember that children are not our accessories. They are their own people, with their own lives and identities. We need to take responsibility for this marriage ourselves. We can't just think that children also need to serve as a stabilizing factor in our relationship within the marriage.

So, it's really important to be able to maintain the relationship together. Learn to be aware of and manage the relationship, and work together to establish mutual trust. Then, you can also raise your partner's children as your own! The key is to overcome your inner selves, be brave, and firmly do things your way. Trust your partner and cultivate your own management abilities.

And the best part is, you can also enjoy the rewards of a happy marriage and a happy ending!

Wishing you all the best!

I appreciate your invitation.

Firstly, I would like to provide a definitive response to your query.

It is a common misconception that couples who are not having children in their second marriage do not have true feelings for each other.

The authenticity of a relationship is not contingent on the opinions of third parties, but rather on the perceptions of the individuals involved in the relationship. In this case, the assessment should be made by you and your husband.

The opinions of others can create confusion and discomfort when there is a lack of emotional experience in the relationship. This may result in a perception of the utilitarian nature of the parent-child relationship, where parents raise their children and children support their parents in old age.

If you evaluate your current situation from a purely utilitarian perspective, you are effectively preventing the emotional growth of your intimate relationship with your husband.

You feel uneasy because she is unable to empathize with you, consider your perspective, and understand your genuine expectations in an emotional relationship.

You desire authentic and unadulterated emotions that are not influenced by external factors.

Furthermore, you may wish to consider whether you have any expectations regarding the support of his children in your old age.

From a legal standpoint, there is no obligation for you to assist in raising his children or for his children to provide financial support in your later years. However, it is important to recognize that people are emotional creatures and that actions have consequences.

In terms of parenting and elder care, the key consideration is whether you are willing to connect emotionally with his children and develop a deep relationship.

Hello, questioner. I am Zaijian Qingxin, and I am here to help.

It's clear from the text that your friends are questioning your relationship and raising the issue of your old age support because you don't want to have any more children in your second marriage. You're worried that, as your friends say, if you don't have any more children, your relationship with your husband will not be strong in the future. You're also worried about having no children to support you in your old age.

Let's talk through your confusion together.

All couples start with love and slowly transform into families.

It's not always the case that existing love slowly transforms into affection between husband and wife. But that's not the point. What matters is whether you feel the love between you and your husband and whether you can successfully go from love to affection and establish a stable intimate relationship.

[Absolutely not! Second-marriage couples don't have biological children, but that doesn't mean they don't deserve true love and emotion.

Second-marriage couples without biological children can absolutely have true love and emotion. Children are not a necessary condition for maintaining an intimate relationship. Passion, intimacy, and commitment in a marriage are far more important than children.

Former Miss Hong Kong Zhu Lingling and her second husband have no children, and it makes no difference to their relationship. The same is true of Nicholas Tse's mother, La Gu, who also has no children with her second husband. Their marriages are happy and fulfilling.

A stable and lasting relationship does not guarantee that you will have children to support you in your old age.

Elderly care is a problem that everyone has to face, regardless of whether you're a second-time married couple or a first-time married couple. It's also a fact that a harmonious relationship and a long-lasting marriage don't necessarily guarantee that you'll have children to support you in your old age.

The bottom line is this: whether children support their parents in their old age depends on the financial situation and family circumstances of the adult children, as well as the children's sense of responsibility towards their parents and the relationship between the parents and children. Therefore, whether they are biological children or stepchildren, they are not a guarantee of support in old age.

To solve this problem, you must rely on yourself and work hard to lay a solid financial foundation. When you are old, you should not trouble your children. Second, you must handle the parent-child relationship between biological children and stepchildren well to strengthen the emotional foundation of both parties. Third, you must trust the government.

You must manage your marriage well, handle the parent-child relationship with your children, and do what you can. Having more children is up to you. Leave the rest to time.

Good day. I am Gu Daoxi, also known as Fengshou Skinny Donkey.

The most common human activity is to conduct one's life in accordance with the expectations of others. While another person may be genuinely beneficial to one's life, it is not necessarily the optimal choice for one's individual needs and circumstances.

As the adage states, "If you are not the fish, how would you know how it feels?" Another individual posited, "Only the feet know whether a shoe pinches or not." It must be acknowledged that some phenomena are most comprehensible to the individual who experiences them.

It is my contention that, in accordance with the fundamental tenets of human nature, your sister's actions are driven by a genuine desire for your well-being, a hope for your happiness, and a reliance on your ability to provide a similar sense of stability in her life. However, it is possible that she has assumed a certain level of reciprocation from you, namely that your partner will not love you as much as you love them.

It is often the case that certain phenomena can only be fully comprehended through direct experience. Furthermore, the initial paragraph of the questioner's marriage ultimately resulted in divorce. It is evident that the sisters' concerns for the individual in question are motivated by benevolent intentions. However, it is crucial to recognize that such sentiments may not always prove beneficial. A meticulous evaluation is therefore essential.

The questioner may attempt to discern the underlying reasons for the other person's continued involvement. Have your feelings withstood the test of setbacks?

It would be beneficial to ascertain whether the other person is typically considerate of you and whether they tend to prioritize your emotional well-being.

It would be beneficial to ascertain whether he would assume responsibility for the family.

The child's behavior may be a reflection of the child's father's attitude. It would be beneficial to observe how the child reacts to you and how the child's father handles the friction between you and the child.

The presence of children in a marriage does not necessarily guarantee the stability of the marriage. In an unstable marriage, children may act as a wedge that ultimately leads to the dissolution of the marriage. If the intention is to strengthen the marriage by having children, it may not be a viable solution.

It seems plausible to suggest that your sister is concerned about your lack of children and the lack of support you may receive in your old age. However, the way you address these two concerns may differ. The fact that the questioner left her children with her former husband does not necessarily imply that she is estranged from them. Stepparents and stepchildren can also develop a genuine relationship.

The relationship between children and marriage is not symbiotic. There are numerous examples of couples who are in love but do not have children together, as well as divorced couples who have children but lack affection for each other. There are also individuals who are not married but have children, and who do not have a romantic relationship with their partner. Therefore, it is essential for the questioner to identify their own desires and expectations regarding marriage, rather than attempting to align themselves with the expectations of others.

It would be beneficial for the original poster to ascertain the underlying motivation for their decision to remarry. Is it driven by a desire for companionship and social interaction, or are there other factors at play?

Do you still perceive yourself as lacking the requisite energy to form a relationship with another individual upon whom you can rely? Or do you genuinely aspire to maintain a lifelong partnership with this person?

It is crucial to be mindful of the foundation of trust upon which a marriage is built. A marriage that is based on trust is more likely to be stable and long-lasting.

It is important to recognize that the presence of children is not a prerequisite for a happy marriage. Cecilia Yip, a prominent actress, has chosen to remain a "double income, no kids" (DINK) couple throughout her adult life. Despite this, she has expressed contentment with her decision, citing her belief that she is not yet equipped to care for a child.

It is recommended that you communicate with your husband about his business plan for your future marriage and express your concerns. It can be reasonably assumed that a person who loves you will provide you with a sense of certainty about the future.

Remarriage does not necessitate the severing of blood ties. Individuals, including one's own children and one's husband's children, may maintain close relationships with one another. Additionally, one's husband's attitude towards one may influence his children's acceptance of one. As an illustrative example, consider the case of my cousin, who has two wives and four children. Despite this, the relationship between his current wife and his ex-wife's children remains unaffected.

It can be observed that relationships that are maintained by links are inherently weak. This is evidenced by the fact that a significant proportion of divorced couples today have no children.

The primary focus of love is the relationship between two individuals. Only when the relationship between partners is unbreakable can they begin to build other relationships, such as having a child.

It is essential to evaluate whether one's financial circumstances can accommodate the addition of another child. While love is undoubtedly a cornerstone of marriage, a robust financial foundation is also a significant determinant of relationship quality. If the financial burden of raising another child proves to be a significant strain on one's resources, it could potentially lead to an accelerated dissolution of the marriage.

The counsel of others in a marriage can only be regarded as a point of reference. The most crucial element is that the couple has a foundation of trust and is in alignment with each other; otherwise, any external turbulence will impede the stability of the relationship.

The aforementioned information is provided for your reference. Best wishes!

Hello, I'm a Heart Exploration coach. Everything is easy. You ask if couples in second marriages without children are worthy of true love.

1⃣️ How married are you?

You and your husband are both remarried. He has two children, and you left yours with your ex.

People often suggest having another child after a second marriage to strengthen the relationship and ensure security in old age.

Your sister says you're just living together now. Even if you work hard to raise your kids, they won't be able to support you in your old age.

After listening to your sister, you feel confused and sad. You believe love comes first and slowly turns into affection. If a couple in a second marriage doesn't have biological children, are they not worthy of true love? I will try to answer your questions.

2⃣️ What's behind the conflict?

The questioner thinks a second marriage will affect the relationship because both people have been hurt in their first marriages.

Two people who have both been hurt in a marriage come together, so it will be harder to trust and feel secure in a second marriage. The questioner is unsure if they can maintain a stable relationship and wants to know how to have true feelings in a second marriage.

The questioner doesn't want to maintain the relationship through children. In your first marriage, you and your partner had children, but didn't continue the marriage through them.

The questioner is worried that having children with their spouse will not necessarily mean that the two of them will grow old together. They are also worried that not having children will make it difficult for the two of them to maintain a stable second marriage.

This is the conflict between avoiding and seeking.

The questioner wants love and a stable relationship. This is their main need in an intimate relationship. They may even want love more than family ties.

The questioner hopes the two people are in love and want to stay together. If they don't love each other, you may be disappointed. Love is the most important need in a marriage.

Both partners must cultivate intimacy.

I don't know if the questioner and his teammate know each other well enough, what caused their first marriage to end, and which needs weren't met that caused it. What brought you two together, and what are the most important needs for both of you in your current marriage? Can your first marriage needs be fulfilled in your current relationship?

Everyone needs love and belonging, but everyone has different needs.

People get married for different reasons. Some want a partner to share their life with. Some want a child. Some want financial support.

First, figure out your and your partner's most important needs. Only when you meet each other's needs, have the same goals, and are willing to work hard to meet each other's needs can your love and marriage last long and be stable. Mutual benefit, equal respect, and the love and marriage of the two of you can only be long-lasting and stable when you first figure out your and your partner's most important needs.

The questioner needs an intimate attachment relationship. Can your teammate be attached to you and also have freedom? Intimacy and love are found in a mutually attached relationship. However, intimacy also requires boundaries and freedom.

The questioner can learn to manage intimate relationships. There are relevant books that can be read and studied, such as "Knowing Love," "Why Love Hurts," "Intimate Relationships," and "Intimate Relationship Management." Through personal growth, you can better understand your own needs.

An intimate relationship is for two people. Both people need to be willing and able to share the same goals to be happy and successful.

The questioner is courageous in pursuing love. A good marriage has love, family, and friendship. A perfect marriage has passion, intimacy, and commitment.

I hope my answer helps. I wish you happiness.