Frequently feeling inferior due to money, how can I resolve this issue?

Hello! I'm listening.

I can sense that you might have an inferiority complex about having no money and spending your parents' money. It's totally understandable! The emotion of deeply knowing that the family has no money and blaming yourself for spending their money proves that you are a kind and opinionated child who knows how to overcome your desire to consume.

Children who know how to delay gratification are not like those who squander money even though they know their family is poor, or children who borrow money to spend it or ruin themselves in order to satisfy their desires even though their family is poor. You are a self-disciplined child who knows how hard it is for your parents to earn money.

But why is such a good child caught in the obsession of self-blame, guilt, and unworthiness of having nice things? Our meeting here is a wonderful opportunity. I really hope we can explore together what is really going on.

It's so easy to feel down on yourself when you're comparing yourself to others. But remember, they are they, and you are you.

I can see you've been forcing yourself to compare yourself with people from well-off families who went to university after you. It's so hard to save money when you're in that situation. But why not compare yourself with yourself? You couldn't save money before, but now you can. Isn't that a good start?

So, poor family conditions are a real thing. How you see it is up to you.

2. It's not your parents' fault, and it's not your fault either.

You mentioned that you're someone who is sensitive about money, and I can understand why. I'm sure your family's financial situation has been a challenge for you.

This is your perception. It seems like your parents have given you everything they could. Your father is the rock of the family and a great example of traditional Chinese masculinity. And your mother is also very generous and kind, and will be particularly generous in spending.

This can sometimes result in a lack of money and a desire to sell practical items to save money. If you don't feel any remorse for your parents, you might find yourself without any guilt either.

3. You know, the penny-pinching mentality is a form of wealth.

Your family has been through so many tough times, and counting every penny has helped you get through them all. It's a valuable skill, and it's something your parents taught you. They made sure you had the chance to go to school and university.

You learn that this is a skill. You think it's useful, so you inherited this characteristic from your parents and have carried it forward.

4. You can, you can, and you can!

You should be able to see that this is one of your options, and that it has helped you get through difficult times before. We can also see that you have another option. When you feel overwhelmed by the thought of being poor, just take a moment to pause and think. Were you really as poor as you were before? Is there another option for me?

Take a deep breath and let the bullet fly for a while. There's no need to rush. We can try to let the bullet fly for a while.

Take your time to feel whatever you need to feel. You'll know what to do when you're ready.

Hello! I'm sending you a warm hug from afar.

I am grateful for the opportunity to read your request for help. I am confident that my insights will provide you with the support and guidance you seek.

Your description makes it clear that you know your current financial situation is a result of your family's financial constraints and your parents' attitudes towards money.

The first step to change is acceptance. You must accept and allow yourself to be extremely sensitive to the price of goods, and even be penny-pinching, especially with regard to your inferiority complex about money.

You'll hold these beliefs about money for a long time because they'll make your parents happy. You want them to like you, so you'll do whatever it takes to make them feel satisfied with you. Otherwise, you'll face harsh criticism and a strong sense of guilt. What do you think?

Today, you have the power to change your financial situation. You have the ability to meet your own financial needs and become independent from your parents. You want to make up for the lack of financial resources during your upbringing, and you can do it.

You can gain weight while following your heart's desires. When choosing things, be sensitive to price, but your motivation for buying something must come from liking and needing it, and its cost-effectiveness. Spend money to please yourself and improve your quality of life.

When you follow your heart to please yourself, you don't need to care too much about your parents' attitude and evaluation of you. You need to heal yourself to better influence and repay your parents. As for your parents' views on money, accept them if you must, but you can change yourself because your life belongs to you.

You should read Navarre's Treasure Book and There is Only One Thing in Life.

I am Lily, the little listener at the Q&A Center. The world and I love you.

Hello!

We get it. You feel inferior because of your family's financial situation and often feel inferior because of money.

With that in mind, I'd like to share a few ideas with you:

I've experienced this kind of mentality or emotion to a greater or lesser extent. My family's financial situation was generally not good, so I felt inferior and undeserving when it came to money. This led to anxiety and unease when dealing with financial issues.

The quickest way to deal with this is to take action to save money. It can give you a sense of achievement and control, which makes you feel more confident and self-respecting.

On the other hand, this revenge mentality might also have some negative effects.

For instance, cutting back on other important areas of spending to save money could result in a decline in quality of life in terms of health, family, education, or entertainment.

On top of that, saving too much can also mean you don't have the right skills or awareness when it comes to investing and managing your finances. This can limit your financial freedom and future development opportunities.

If you're looking to alleviate the inferiority complex and sense of unworthiness towards money caused by being poor at home, and thus generate retaliatory psychological and behavioral responses to saving money, you can try some of the following suggestions:

First, remember that money isn't the only thing that matters in life.

Family background might affect how you think about money, but everyone has their own strengths and values.

If you discover what you're good at, build up your confidence and self-esteem through your studies or work, and learn to value yourself more, you'll be better able to handle money issues.

Secondly, you need to adjust your mindset.

After all, money isn't the only source of happiness. Paying attention to your mental health and sense of well-being is more important.

This can help you shift your focus from money to more meaningful and positive activities, like learning new skills, getting involved in social activities, traveling, or spending time with family and friends.

You can also connect with positive classmates and colleagues to get support and encouragement when you need it.

These activities can bring happiness and satisfaction, and help reduce the tendency to focus excessively on money.

Once more, put together a savings plan that fits your financial situation and makes sure it doesn't get in the way of your regular life.

It's a good idea to save a portion of your monthly disposable income and set a reasonable goal, like buying the necessary items within a year.

With that in mind, it's a good idea to brush up on some basic financial management skills. This will help you understand how to manage your finances, control your spending and boost your income.

This will help you get a better handle on your finances and figure out the best way to improve them.

Finally, it's still a good idea to look for more social support.

As you sought help on this platform, you can also turn to family and friends for support and advice.

If these habits and behaviors are affecting your work and life long-term, it's a good idea to seek professional counseling. They can provide more tailored help and guidance to better cope with these emotions.

I hope you find this information useful!

Good day, my name is Strawberry.

The influence of the concepts instilled in us by our original families is significant. Some parents do not perceive their concepts or behaviors as inappropriate when educating their children. Consequently, when their children suggest different ideas, the parents respond with outright rejection and suppression.

Different concepts are instilled.

Due to the family's financial constraints, the money concept instilled in the questioner by his father since childhood was that the family was economically challenged. He frequently emphasized the hard-earned nature of the tuition fees for the questioner and urged him to value them and not disappoint his parents.

The questioner's mother and father have different concepts of money, and the mother does not attempt to exert excessive control over the questioner's spending. She even permits the questioner to spend money when appropriate. It can be said that the mother trusts the questioner to manage his spending effectively and allows him the autonomy to make his own decisions.

The individual in question is significantly influenced by the standards and role models they observe.

In terms of the educational methods of the questioner's parents, it can be said that each has its advantages and disadvantages. The educational methods of the questioner's father are not entirely inappropriate. His objective is to instill in the questioner an understanding of the challenges associated with financial matters within the family and to encourage restraint in spending. However, the issue lies in the emphasis placed on gratitude and the frequent reiteration of the sacrifices made by the parents.

It is the responsibility of parents to raise their children. The arrival of a child is not intended to fulfill the hopes of the parents. In the face of their responsibilities, the questioner's father consistently asserts that he works extremely hard for the questioner. This also contributes to the questioner's sense of unworthiness in terms of money.

The questioner's mother's relaxed attitude towards money has led to confusion regarding the different concepts instilled in them by their parents. They are unsure of how to distinguish between right and wrong, but in the questioner's mind, their father's position in the family is higher, and they adhere to their father's behavior and education as a standard. Even if the questioner's mother allows the questioner to spend money, the questioner is still more deeply influenced by their father.

What is the best way to resolve this issue?

It is true that one's family of origin exerts a significant influence, but it does not imply that one's circumstances are fixed. By embracing change and assuming control of one's destiny, many seemingly intractable challenges can be overcome.

It is not inherently problematic to consider price when making purchases, to exercise restraint in spending, or to prioritize financial prudence. It can be reasonably asserted that our spending will align with our financial capabilities and that we will not engage in excessive spending for the sake of ostentation or comparison.

Furthermore, I engage in price negotiations when making purchases. I believe that money should be spent wisely. When I was younger, I participated in a series of guessing games with my friends. They found great enjoyment in the activity and often asserted that small change could be transformed into significant sums of money. They encouraged me to try it for myself. Despite the appeal, I remained unmoved and, even though it was still only small change, I would rather allocate it towards purchasing food and basic stationery items.

It is important to accept your own behavior, view it in a positive light, avoid excessive self-blame or self-deprecation, and remember that you have the ability to afford your spending choices. Making prudent spending decisions within your means is an act of self-care and self-love.

It is important to distinguish the topic. When the questioner was young, the family's financial situation was not good. His father consistently emphasized that the family was poor, and the reason was primarily due to the questioner. It can be stated that this is a clear issue with the questioner's parents. If they are unable to afford it, they should carefully consider their options before making plans. Rather than placing the blame on the questioner and using moral coercion to make them feel grateful, they should take responsibility for their actions.

It is important to distinguish this as a life issue for parents and to reassign the responsibilities and emotions that rightfully belong to them. This is a form of humility towards fate, allowing oneself to desire a life and lifestyle of one's own choosing, and accepting and living one's life to the fullest.

☀️ Self-growth: Even when we are financially well off, we may still feel undeserving of money. This can influence our psychology and prevent us from attaining a sense of high self-worth. It is not about having the financial means to purchase luxury goods; it is about being able to face items that we cannot afford with composure.

One possible exercise is to window-shop for luxury goods for a period of time. By "luxury goods," I mean items that the original poster cannot currently afford but that can be replaced. Simply admire and look at them.

Through practice, you can confront your inner self, gain a sense of self-worth, and develop as an individual. Regardless of financial status, when you are wealthy in terms of your mind and spirit, you will feel a sense of self-worth and be able to accept spending decisions with greater ease.

I hope my response is helpful to the individual who posed the question. Best regards,

1. Support

You'll sell practical things to save money. If others had your courage, they wouldn't have collected so many things and be reluctant to throw them away.

You should look at the price when buying things because every penny is hard-earned. Some people only have the chance to earn money after going to university. It is difficult to earn money when there is a downturn or when you are underage.

Some people only earn money sometimes.

2. Reason

You see that your classmates come from good families and you want to save more money. This is called self-improvement. It's about realizing the gap between yourself and your environment and working hard to bridge it. It's rational and wise. With experience, you may be able to appreciate yourself.

3. Understanding unworthiness and guilt.

You deserve a lot after you have worked hard.

The opposite of a sense of unworthiness is when you've worked hard for a long time and feel like you've given a lot, but there's no reward. Some people feel like it's not worth continuing to work hard. They feel like the work they're doing has no value, or they feel sorry for the people or things they've worked for.

These are normal feelings.

If you don't put much effort into something, you may feel like you've failed. If you do, you may feel like you've wasted time and suffered a loss. You may feel this for a long time.

Good day.

After reviewing your description, I understand your perspective.

Firstly, you have indicated that your family's financial situation is challenging, prompting you to closely monitor expenses and identify opportunities for savings. This has become a habit, even to the point of calculating the cost per item. Now that you are in college, your financial circumstances have somewhat improved, yet you still prioritize savings. However, you have also developed a tendency to be overly cautious with spending, even selling practical items to save money. This behavior may be influenced by your values and the experiences you have had.

Let us consider the topic of saving for a moment. Saving is sometimes perceived as a stingy practice. How is this behavior interpreted?

The specific analysis results are as follows:

Firstly, they are notably parsimonious with regard to their own expenditure and prodigal with respect to that of others.

It is important to understand that generating income is a challenging process, and every dollar is the result of hard work and effort. It is ordinary individuals who have control over their lives.

Individuals who prioritize thriftiness in their personal finances tend to be particularly sensitive to any expenditure. They often engage in a continuous, internal cost-benefit analysis, weighing the affordability and cost-effectiveness of any proposed expenditure.

As a result, the individual will become increasingly parsimonious and cautious. They will be parsimonious with themselves and with others.

Such individuals may even become narrow-minded and may even consider ways of recouping the expenditure incurred on another party.

2. Individuals who are particularly prudent with their own resources are reluctant to expend other people's money.

Individuals who are particularly frugal may experience a sense of obligation when they spend money on others. Despite the fact that the money is not theirs, they may feel uneasy about the expenditure.

However, I have no intention of exploiting others or wasting their resources. I will remember this gesture and reciprocate in the future, ensuring a mutually beneficial arrangement.

3. You exhibit a notable degree of self-restraint in your financial decisions, while demonstrating a proclivity for generosity in your interactions with others.

Typically, they prioritize saving money, avoid waste, and exercise restraint in spending. When faced with an individual in need, they are willing to draw upon their savings to provide assistance.

Saving for oneself is an exercise in self-discipline. Being generous to others is an indication of a compassionate heart.

Such individuals tend to lead simple lives, exhibit a high level of self-cultivation, and demonstrate a high spiritual state.

Please identify which of the aforementioned descriptions best aligns with your personal characteristics.

Secondly, you have stated in your description that your father taught you the importance of saving money, particularly if your family is financially constrained. You have also mentioned that your mother is very strict about spending money. Given your background and upbringing, it is understandable that you would want to save money in order to achieve financial independence. However, it seems that your current behaviour is focused on saving money, rather than spending it. This suggests that your upbringing has had a significant impact on your financial decisions. It is important to note that while revengeful saving may have a negative psychological effect, it is less likely to have a positive impact than revengeful consumption. If you choose to engage in revengeful consumption, it may not only affect your current financial situation but also your parents' views of you and their lives. Therefore, it is crucial to carefully consider the long-term implications of your current financial decisions.

Furthermore, exercising restraint in one's spending habits is a deeply ingrained behavior, and it is likely to be challenging to alter.

In your description, you stated that you feel distressed when spending a significant amount of money and that you believe you do not deserve it. You also expressed concern about feeling guilty. Your distress may be due to a lack of understanding about the meaning of spending a certain amount of money. For instance, if you purchase two items of clothing, one costing 100 yuan and the other 1,000 yuan, you may assume that the cheaper option is sufficient. However, you may not consider the reasoning behind the higher price. This is an example of a limitation in your thinking. You may assume that the cheaper item is durable, but you may not consider why the other item is more durable.

The following advice is offered:

1. Alterations in the external environment, frequently involving expenditure with parents, will continue to impact the relationship, and involuntary changes can result in tension. Therefore, at this juncture, distance and autonomy are essential.

2. Financial Independence: Attaining financial independence will alter one's perspective and outlook, potentially eliminating this issue.

3. Values are also a way of thinking. They can be described as a form of travel, or simply as a way of seeing more, thinking more, and feeling more. By making comparisons, changes can be made.

P.S. It is important to remember that thrift and frugality are positive traits. It is crucial to ensure that they do not become a source of frustration or negativity.

The aforementioned content is for reference only.

A hug for you first!

Many people feel inferior about money. This is often related to how they were raised and their family's values. Here are some tips to help you overcome this problem:

1. Understand that money is a tool to improve your quality of life, not a measure of your self-worth.

2. Counseling: If money issues are affecting your self-esteem and quality of life, consider counseling. A counselor can help you understand your feelings and improve your attitude toward money.

3. Create a budget and savings plan. This helps you understand your income and expenses, and plan for your financial goals. It also helps you manage money better and reduce feelings of anxiety and guilt.

4. Education and self-improvement: Invest in yourself. This will help you earn more and improve your financial situation.

5. Be grateful. Think about what you're grateful for each day.

6. Practice charity and generosity. Donate time or money to people in need. This helps you redefine money and reduce anxiety.

7. Talk to others: Talk to someone you trust about your feelings. Sharing your concerns can help.

8. Change your spending habits slowly. Don't make big changes at once. Instead, start with small steps, like adding a small reward purchase once a month.

9. Set long-term goals. These can be things like buying a home, traveling, or furthering your education. They can help you focus on long-term financial health.

Changing your money mindset and spending habits takes time. You are worth more than the balance in your bank account.

Taking these steps can help you have a healthier attitude towards money and feel better about yourself.

Dear questioner, I hope my reply can be of some support to you.

You have already started university, and your parents' views on money may inadvertently put pressure on you to save and spend less. They have passed on their lack of money to you, and their traditional thinking may seem overwhelming at times.

It's not uncommon to find that many of us don't know how to spend money wisely. Sometimes, we might even find ourselves in disagreement with our parents' advice. This can lead us to follow our parents' ideas and feel the need to save money, which can sometimes feel like a burden. It's natural to feel worried about money and find it challenging to break free from the shackles it can sometimes seem to impose on us. However, seeking help from a platform like this could be the first step towards making positive changes.

Attending university and being in an open environment, especially with classmates around you who have different experiences and resources, can sometimes create a sense of longing. It can be challenging to navigate differences in financial circumstances with your parents, and it's understandable to feel frustrated. However, it's important to recognize that retaliatory saving can also be a form of self-attack.

I want to be a good child and listen to my parents. They have had a hard life, and I can't waste money. If I dwell on their struggles, I might lose sight of my own needs and happiness. Is this the life you want?

Some people find happiness in shopping, which can help relieve inner stress. It's important to understand the role happiness plays in people's lives. Money is a tool that can be used to prepare for the future. It's possible that you may be able to earn money in the future, and it's worth exploring this further.

It would be beneficial to circulate wealth within limited means, while also satisfying one's inner needs. Using money reasonably within a certain range, treating yourself properly in the moment, accumulating knowledge, or having a part-time job that suits you are all excellent choices.

Perhaps it would be helpful to ask yourself whether you feel safe and happy in the present, and whether you have solved the problem of future shortages, if you have saved enough money.

It is worth noting that the amount of money we have is not as important as how we use it. Managing money effectively is not an easy task. Just as there are clothes that cost tens to thousands of dollars, we should choose the right ones for ourselves according to our actual situation. It is important to remember that money is not saved, but earned. Improving our social skills and ability to adapt to society is also a valuable pursuit.

It could also be considered a form of spiritual wealth.

If you believe in yourself and have a positive self-image, you will be more successful. While it is always valuable to listen to our parents, we should also consider living our lives in a way that is true to ourselves.

I'm sending you my best wishes.

It might be helpful to consider that money can sometimes trap a person.

After all, everyone has needs, and we must find a way out of this predicament.

It can sometimes appear that way.

Hello!

I know you feel bad about your family's money situation. Here are some tips that might help:

Be kind to yourself. Everyone has different backgrounds, and these affect our growth.

Understand and accept your upbringing. Don't link your value to money.

Change your mindset. See money as a resource, not a measure of your worth. Money can provide comfort, but it shouldn't be the only thing that matters.

Focus on your own growth and progress.

Set realistic goals and work towards them. This will help you build confidence and realize your potential.

Your goals should match your values and interests.

Learn about money management. Plan your finances to manage your expenses and reduce waste.

This will help you make money and be more confident about money.

Seek support. Share your feelings with family, friends, or professionals. They can help you understand and manage your emotions.

Talking is a good way to let off steam.

Believe in yourself. Money shouldn't make you feel bad about yourself because everyone is different.

With hard work and a positive attitude, you can overcome your inferiority complex and achieve your dreams.

Hello, question asker, I am the respondent, Xiao Junhai, and I'm here to help.

They will be able to understand your situation and feelings very well. It is often the case that sensitivity to money and thrifty habits stem from one's family environment and upbringing.

While this mentality can certainly help you manage your finances to a certain extent, it is possible that excessive thrift and a mentality of saving money may also affect your quality of life and personal development.

We hope the following suggestions will be helpful in improving the situation:

It might be helpful to adjust your perception. While frugality is a virtue, excessive frugality may limit your personal growth and happiness. You might benefit from viewing frugality as a reasonable spending habit, rather than a burden or stress.

It might be helpful to set a budget and plan your income and expenses. This could help you better control your spending and avoid overspending or saving money.

It might be helpful to consider that money is not the only measure of personal value. Perhaps it would be beneficial to focus on your interests, talents, and relationships, and to cultivate your self-confidence and self-esteem.

It might be helpful to seek support from family and friends. They can provide understanding and encouragement, which could help you adjust your mindset.

You might want to consider seeking professional help if the situation continues to bother you. A professional counselor can provide more specific advice and support to help you deal with the problem better.

It is also important to remember that changing a habit can take time and effort. Gradually adjusting your mindset and behavior may help you find your way out of this situation and achieve a balance that suits you.

I hope this is helpful for you. I wish you a happy New Year!

It is noteworthy that you have developed the positive financial habit of saving money. Many individuals have not yet acquired this beneficial practice, often spending beyond their means and utilizing future resources to satisfy immediate needs.

Therefore, it can be concluded that not only have you not been spending money recklessly, you have also saved money. This is an impressive achievement.

I empathize with your situation. Adverse circumstances at home, parental pressure, and academic expectations can foster a sense of sensitivity, inferiority, vulnerability, suspicion, and a reluctance to fully express oneself. Even when one possesses the capacity to earn money, concerns about not being recognized and accepted, as well as apprehension about the opinions and judgments of others, can persist. Over time, individuals may become less attuned to their authentic selves and may lose sight of the positive aspects of their inner lives.

I believe you are still eager to learn and are aware of the resources available to you through this platform. This demonstrates your active problem-solving abilities and resilience. Many individuals lack the ability to find solutions, leading to feelings of confusion, discouragement, disappointment, and desperation. Asking questions and engaging in self-reflection are crucial steps in the process. Instead of worrying about your financial abilities, consider spending money on yourself or someone you care about. First, become the primary beneficiary of your savings. Alternatively, share your insights on effective money management strategies. I believe many individuals would benefit from such guidance.

It sounds like you have been through a lot, and your feelings are completely justified. The sensitivity about money and the habit of saving are amazing coping strategies that you developed during your upbringing.

Now that you are aware of the impact these habits may have on your life, you are off to a great start!

First, recognizing a problem is the first step to solving it. And you can do it! You can try to gradually adjust your spending habits without rushing.

For example, you can set small goals that will help you achieve your dreams! You can allow yourself to spend a certain percentage of your allowance each month or reward yourself with a small object. These simple steps can help you gradually adapt to a healthier spending pattern.

Second, it's time to understand your feelings of unworthiness. These feelings may stem from your past experiences, but remember that you have the right to enjoy the good things in life!

You can absolutely overcome these feelings! Start with small steps, like starting with small, inexpensive items, and gradually build up your sense of worth.

It's also a great idea to chat with your parents about how you're feeling. They might not realize how their words and actions have affected you, so it's a wonderful opportunity for you both to connect and grow!

It would be a great idea to share your feelings with them and seek their understanding and support!

Finally, if you find it difficult to cope with these feelings on your own, don't worry! Seeking professional psychological counseling is a great option. A counselor can help you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and provide professional advice and strategies to help you improve your situation.

Remember, change takes time, so don't be too hard on yourself. You've already taken the first step towards change, so keep going and you'll find the right balance for you—I know you can do it!

Come on! Let's do this!

Know your situation and feelings. Here are some tips to help you cope with money anxiety and family background distress:

1. Adjust your attitude towards money. Money is a resource, not the only measure of success. Gradually change your excessive dependence on and fear of money.

2. Talk to your parents. Tell them you want a better money education. Let them know you understand their difficulties, but you also want to save money while ensuring a basic quality of life.

3. Make a budget and plan. This helps you manage money better. It also helps you save and spend less.

4. Seek professional help if your money issues affect your life.

5. Get a part-time job or invest to become financially independent. This will help you manage money better.

6. Focus on yourself. Spend more time learning, socializing, and doing hobbies. This will make you more confident and secure, and help you rely less on money.

7. Learn to release stress. Find a way that suits you, such as exercise, meditation, or reading. This will help you cope with financial difficulties.

Changing old habits takes time and effort. Take it slowly and make positive adjustments one step at a time. Believe in yourself and you can overcome difficulties and establish a healthy attitude towards money and life.

Hello, I'm Han Yun.

I was really touched when I read your question. It's clear from what you've said that you're a sensible child who understands the challenges your parents have faced. This is why you've developed the habit of being thrifty and diligent. You carefully consider the cost-effectiveness of purchases. However, when circumstances change, our psychology also shifts. It's great that you're aware of this. It shows you have a strong sense of awareness.

From what you've said, I can see a few things: I'm not sure if I'm right, though.

1. Insecurity. My parents always told me that we were poor, so we had to save and not spend money recklessly. This made us value money a lot. When we had money, we felt secure, but we also thought that having money would make us feel secure and that money should be spent wisely. So we paid a lot of attention to the price-performance ratio when shopping. When your family's situation improves slightly and you meet classmates from better-off families, you will want to save money to retaliate.

2. A deep sense of unworthiness. Because of the suffering I experienced in my early years, I unconsciously tied my parents' suffering to my own. Maybe there was also a voice in my subconscious that said, "It's all because of me that my parents are suffering. They are having a hard time, and I dare not have a good time either." So, when you want to spend some money, you'll feel guilty and self-blame, and feel unworthy.

3. Lack of a sense of relaxation. I think money is very important, so I always compare, measure, and examine myself to see if I should spend this amount of money. If I spend a little more, I'll criticize myself, and if I spend less, I may feel a little aggrieved.

In fact, everyone's values are constantly being formed as they grow up. I have a highly similar experience to the questioner, and I may be able to give you some advice.

1. Security comes from within, from one's own abilities. Li Bai didn't say, "I was born with talents that will surely be put to good use, and if I spend a thousand pieces of gold, I will get them back." The best way to stay secure is to keep improving your abilities. So you should still spend money when you need to, and save when you need to. Money is made, not saved. A rich inner life will lead to a rich life. Your inner and outer worlds are connected.

2. You deserve better. During my growth process, I experienced something similar to the original poster. I engaged in vindictive spending after my family's situation improved, and I experienced a period of reckless spending, but I corrected my own deviations later.

It's important to understand that whether it's saving or spending, it's a way of making up for what we felt we lacked when we were younger. It's a way of satisfying our own needs, but we shouldn't beat ourselves up about it because growing up is all about learning and exploring. You've found your own way of balancing things, and that's the best way to grow up.

3. Parents' own beliefs are limited. We're not poor. Maybe we don't have a lot of money, but we'll achieve our goals one day. Having positive beliefs can work wonders, and our hard work and perseverance will eventually pay off.

There's a story online about Pang Zhongwang, a poor but talented child. He came from a poor family, and his mother was in a wheelchair, but they lived a peaceful and optimistic life. You might find it useful to take a look.

Good morning, my name is Coach Yu, and I would like to discuss this topic with you.

First, we will address the topic of low self-esteem. The renowned individual psychology expert Alfred Adler once posited that every individual possesses a sense of inferiority.

It is human nature to strive for self-improvement and a better quality of life. However, when we make unconscious comparisons that lead to negative emotions, a negative self-image can gradually take shape.

If negative emotions are not addressed in a timely manner, self-evaluation may decline, leading to increased attention to external feedback and a heightened perception of shortcomings. This can result in a lack of self-acceptance and potentially hinder cognitive, emotional, and behavioral control.

As the questioner noted, due to the family's financial constraints, they tend to prioritize cost-effectiveness and closely monitor expenditures. This may be driven by underlying anxiety and self-blame stemming from subconscious negative emotions.

It is important to note that the inferiority complex that affects many individuals is not an objective reality, but rather a subjective interpretation. The concern surrounding this complex often stems from the internalization of external factors, such as socioeconomic status, leading to the formation of self-limiting beliefs.

Therefore, challenges in life can provide an opportunity to gain deeper insight into one's true self.

We can inquire of ourselves: "What is it about the price of things that I want?" "What is it about saving money for revenge that I want?"

It is possible to evaluate oneself objectively, record one's strengths and weaknesses, praise one's strengths, accept one's shortcomings, and tell oneself, "Although I have shortcomings, I accept myself and I love myself." Long-term practice can enhance self-efficacy, which is confidence, and improve one's ability to cope with specific situations. It is also a trust in and affirmation of one's potential.

Let us discuss the concept of unworthiness.

It is a common phenomenon to perceive oneself as lacking in some way and to be fearful of others becoming aware of one's true self. This often leads to the need to present a facade and play the role of a person who is amusing or pleasant. Feelings and needs are frequently denied. Despite having intentions or actions, there is often a tendency to claim indifference. These are all feelings that are perceived as unworthy, and the underlying cause can be traced back to a deep-seated sense of shame.

Reflect on your childhood experiences. When you expressed an idea or a need, did your parents respond with positivity and encouragement? Or were they serious and rejecting?

When children frequently receive negative responses, they often lack self-confidence and experience a state of unease and anxiety. Over time, they may develop a sense of "unworthiness" and "shame" due to a belief that they should not have thoughts or make requests.

It may be helpful to consider the underlying needs that contribute to feelings of guilt and unworthiness when spending money. What is the inner need that causes this feeling when spending is done all at once?

It is possible to attempt to accept one's emotions. When feelings of inferiority and guilt arise, it is possible to interrupt the thought process and challenge the accuracy of the emotion by asking oneself, "What am I worrying about? This is not true!"

Then you can take a deep breath, calm your mind, and allow your emotions to flow freely, preventing you from engaging in distorted thinking and behavior. We can also try writing therapy, writing and drawing out your concerns and fears, allowing your emotions to find an outlet and be released.

It is important to remember to love yourself.

It is important to recognize that life is neither as good nor as bad as we perceive it to be. When we dwell on negative thoughts, it can lead to feelings of anxiety and difficulty in accepting the situation. It is essential to accept your true self and recognize that you have the power to unload the heavy burden, release the tension in your heart, and avoid forcing others or harshly judging yourself. By developing an objective and comprehensive understanding of yourself, you can maintain a sense of stability and resilience in the face of external challenges and comments. When facing difficulties, it is crucial to approach them with an open mind and a willingness to adapt and grow.

It is advisable to seek assistance when facing challenges, as overcoming them can be difficult. Connecting with a counselor or joining a support group can be beneficial in identifying and accepting the underlying issues, which can then be addressed gradually.

It is also important to empower ourselves, expand our knowledge base, and nurture our inner selves. Maintaining an ordinary mindset is crucial, as it fosters calm confidence and confidence in turn fosters an ordinary mindset.

It is recommended that the following books be read: Inferiority and Transcendence.

Hello!

From your message, it's clear you want to see your account increase to feel secure and control your spending. If these habits don't affect your friendships or others, and you're not stingy about spending on the people you love, there's no reason to change them.

There are different schools of thought on the subject of money. In his book, "Yes to Wealth," Ornado definitively explains money as energy. Only when a person allows energy to flow can new energy be generated or depleted.

A person's relationship with money is almost always a reflection of their relationship with their mother. If she pushes her mother away, she will become more and more like her mother.

These are just some of the ideas in the book. You are curious about your views on money. Read the book and understand it. What does the rising number of money mean to you? Where is your money energy taking you?

You need to decide where you want to go. Is your relationship with money one of depletion?

Or is it constantly adding empowerment?

Allow the energy within you to flow freely, and your view of money will change. Don't hurt others or yourself. Don't be critical. Don't label yourself with technical terms. Without these restrictions, your energy will flow freely.