His boyfriend's family lives with another woman, can't bear it?

Hello,

It is understandable that this situation is challenging to navigate. Your feelings are understandable, given that you have been betrayed and deceived, and your trust has been broken.

It would be wise to consider your own future and happiness as well. Here are some tips to help you deal with the situation:

Take some time to reflect and think calmly before making any decisions. Ask yourself if you truly need to meet with this person.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether staying with him is the best option for you.

2. Communicate: If you feel the need to meet with him, you might consider trying to communicate with him again. You could tell him how you feel and what you need, and let him know what you think.

It is also possible that he may not respond or may reject you, so it would be wise to be prepared for that.

3. Consider seeking support from friends, family, or a professional. They can provide valuable emotional support and advice to help you navigate this challenging time.

4. Let go of the past: If you decide to end the relationship, it may be helpful to try to let go of the past and stop dwelling on past events. Although this can be challenging, it may be beneficial to focus on the future and explore new opportunities and possibilities.

5. Focus on yourself: It may be helpful to consider ways to take care of your physical and mental health during this process. Maintaining healthy habits and engaging in activities that help you relax and relieve stress could be beneficial.

In the meantime, it might be helpful to explore new interests and build a social circle to enrich your life.

6. Accept reality: Finally, accept reality. Sometimes we cannot change other people's behavior or thinking, so it may be helpful to accept reality and focus on making ourselves stronger.

It may be helpful to believe that time will heal all wounds and that you will find your own happiness.

In short, it takes courage and determination to deal with this situation. As long as you hold on to your beliefs and values, you can believe that you can find a way out of this situation and find your own happiness.

Good morning, I am Xintan Coach Fei Yun. Life is a beautiful journey, and it is not so much about appreciation as it is about blooming.

My dear, I offer you my sympathies. It seems that you are unable to let go of this relationship, yet you are also unable to swallow your pride. This has led to a sense of haunting and an inability to find peace in the present. You have expressed a desire to part as friends, but it is important to recognize that those on the outside may see things more clearly than those on the inside. The other person may also perceive that you are still entangled and that things will not be the same.

1. Perhaps it would be helpful to consider that it is not the other person that you cannot let go of, but the efforts you have made in this relationship.

After all, you were once in love, and those beautiful moments spent together are not easily forgotten.

No matter what the cause of the breakup may have been, there may have been misunderstandings and anger, which is regrettable or unfortunate, but at least it was once beautiful.

As you mentioned, you are not comfortable with the idea of using the things you purchased with your money to make them feel at ease. I can understand why you are upset. You were once very devoted to this relationship and loved him deeply. While your approach to love may not align with their expectations, you did love him very much.

He may be your ideal type, and it's possible that you don't love him in the traditional sense. Perhaps you idealize him more than you love him.

? 2. Second, it seems that what you truly desire is not money (compensation), but something that will keep you two connected.

He has accumulated a debt of 500,000 yuan, and you have followed him for two years with great dedication. Do you have concerns about financial matters? It seems that you are not interested in the 20,000 yuan compensation he has offered.

Perhaps it is the "petty calculation" that provides a sense of connection.

From my own experience, I would gently suggest that when someone offers you 20,000 yuan, it can be difficult to maintain a positive relationship moving forward. It can feel like that amount of money negates all the past experiences between you.

I hope you understand that I'm not trying to prevent you from "safeguarding" your legitimate rights. I just want you to see how you feel at the moment. You're not haggling over money or the relationship.

3. Ultimately, the best way to respect yourself and the relationship is to part ways amicably and allow things to unfold naturally.

It could be said that all kinds of entanglements are simply a result of an unwillingness to let go and an inability to do so.

It could be said that relationships are the patterns of interaction formed during the course of two people's lives. When a relationship breaks down, it may be helpful to consider that both parties may have played a role in its dissolution.

It would be beneficial to take a moment to reflect on the positive aspects of your relationship.

In our lives, there are many such situations. Some people come into our lives, some people leave, and some people come and go.

Each person we meet in our lives can teach us something valuable. It is up to us to recognize these lessons and find the wisdom in them.

I hope the above has been helpful to you. I also hope it has been helpful to the world. And I love you.

If you would like to continue communicating, you are welcome to follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service."

Hello.

You are an ISTJ personality. This type of personality is conscientious, responsible, loyal, and stable in relationships. They value tradition and rules, clear expectations, and honest communication.

You have invested more in this relationship than your partner has. This is not a fair exchange.

You are serious about relationships and committed long-term. You are honest and trust others.

Your ex is a liar.

It's hard to get back what you've paid for. It's even harder to get back what you've given with your heart.

You've invested a lot in this person. I think you're reluctant to let go of the idea of them, not the person themselves.

You gave so much to this person. We give out what we want back.

If you can't get it back, you will go to him again and again. Going to collect the debt seems like you still can't let go.

He thinks you still want to be with him.

This is hard to accept. You were serious, committed, and dedicated, thinking you would receive the same in return and have a happy ending.

You never thought the promises would be lies. You're annoyed that what you thought was beautiful is now being rejected.

This is unfair to you. You want justice. If there is no justice, you can't accept it. He is different from you. You are used to fairness and justice, but he is not.

It's probably impossible to do him justice.

This may be the first stage of a breakup. You can't accept that you've given so much and have been betrayed.

He gave so much and got nothing in return. You made a mistake and chose the wrong person.

We look for loved ones with dreams. We all have limits.

We all see people through tinted glasses. This person is seen through our glasses, which whitewash his image.

What we see is not the real person. Especially when you say you admire those qualities, he may not have them.

You see him as having those qualities because you're looking at him through rose-colored glasses. Does he need you to get by in life?

He's living with another woman now.

When we love someone, we focus on the good and ignore the bad. We make our partner seem better than they really are. In reality, the person we love isn't perfect.

Losing love is painful.

During this time, you will worry and feel sad. You may feel lonely, which makes it worse.

You can also talk to your parents or live with them.

It will help with loneliness.

Any more effort on your part with your ex will be pointless. It will only annoy him.

You can't go back since you've seen his true colors.

If you can't accept the insult, it may be because you don't want to admit you made a mistake. If you can accept that you failed, you can move on.

You say he won't meet. Why do you want to meet?

Do you want to confirm you were dumped and you were wrong about the person? If you just want your money back, you only need to talk to him on the phone.

Talk to a counselor if you're still thinking about meeting.

What do you want from the meeting?

What do you want from the meeting? Is it realistic?

Love yourself.

Hello! I'd like to extend a warm hug from afar to you.

I am grateful to have the opportunity to offer my support and assistance. From your description, it seems that you are experiencing a range of intense emotions, including frustration, anger, confusion, helplessness, and a sense of powerlessness. It's understandable that you desire to be understood, respected, accepted, and loved.

Indeed, nobody is perfect. There is, however, a part of this man that you especially admire and appreciate.

However, it seems that he did not completely break up with you. Perhaps there were some conflicts and you chose to cohabit with another person of the opposite sex. It seems that you learned during the two years you were together that he owed 500,000 yuan, and you were always responsible for most of the expenses you had together. It seems that he was not the most responsible person, and there were instances when he got drunk and drove. When you had conflicts, it seems that he resented you and belittled your contributions. These are not the behaviors of someone who is mature enough in mind and sound enough in character. What are your thoughts on this?

It seems that you have experienced a great deal of neglect, indifference, and being ignored and unloved during the two years you have spent with him. However, you may lack the courage to express your true feelings and needs to him. This could indicate that you are emotionally dependent on him. You may be seeking to satisfy your need to be accepted, needed, and loved by giving to him and accepting, understanding, and tolerating him more. It seems that you are very humble in love in this relationship with him, and you may not have a strong sense of self in this relationship. What are your thoughts on this?

While it is not within your power to control or decide whether he betrays you or disrespects you, you do have the option of facing his hurt. You can try to express your true feelings and needs in a brave and sincere manner, with the hope that he will realize the impact of his actions and treat you with the respect you deserve.

Perhaps it would be helpful to focus more on yourself. Have you considered why you chose him as your boyfriend? Even though he has hurt you, you still don't have the courage to end the relationship. Have you identified what your inner needs have been met by him during your time together? You might like to try to grow and give yourself what you need through your own efforts.

It could be said that intimacy is a relationship between two people, but it is also a relationship with our inner selves. Perhaps we can only truly be true to ourselves in relationships when we have fully accepted ourselves from the inside out, when we have confidence in our own goodness and in our right to be treated well by ourselves and others.

They are careful not to project their inner feelings of inadequacy onto others. When the words or actions of others make them feel uncomfortable or hurt, they can express their true inner feelings and needs in a brave and honest way.

From what you've shared, it seems that you already have some insights into this relationship. It's natural to experience a range of emotions when we're betrayed, disrespected, or unloved. These feelings can sometimes make it challenging to recognize the resources and abilities we have to move forward.

It might be helpful to give yourself time to sort out the relationship by writing about it. This could be a safe way for you to express your accumulated grievances, anger, and sadness. When your emotions can be seen, accepted, and responded to, you might be able to make an objective and accurate judgment of the relationship. This could help you take responsibility for your own choices and decisions.

You might find it helpful to read the books Will it Get Better When I Grow Up?, When You Learn to Love Yourself, the Whole World Will Come to Love You, and Why Love Hurts.

First, it's important to understand that a healthy, equal relationship is based on mutual respect, understanding, and support. From your description, it seems like the relationship has taken a turn for the worse. Here are some suggestions for improvement in several areas:

It's time to rethink your self-worth.

- **Self-esteem and self-love:** You said you overlooked his shortcomings because you saw some of his good qualities. But if the other person's behavior in a relationship makes you feel hurt and disrespected, those "good qualities" aren't enough reason to stay in the relationship. You need to ask yourself if you're willing to live in an environment that makes you feel pain and disrespect.

- **Self-growth**: Use this experience to reflect on your role and behavior in the relationship. Think about whether you were too dependent or neglected your self-worth. Learn from your mistakes, become more self-aware, develop your own interests and hobbies, and improve your sense of self-worth.

Next, you'll want to handle the practical matters after the breakup in a logical way.

If the other person owes you money, you can try to resolve the issue through legal channels. Keep all evidence, including transfer records, WeChat chat records, etc., and consult a legal professional to understand your rights.

It can be tough to move on from a breakup, but it's important to focus on your future and happiness. If you're struggling with the emotional impact of the breakup, you can seek professional guidance from a psychologist.

### 3. Rebuilding your life

- Social Networks: Connect with family and friends more and focus on other positive social activities. Getting support from others is a great way to feel better about yourself and boost your confidence.

- Hobbies: Taking up new interests and getting involved in things like sports, reading, and the arts can all help to lift your mood and boost your self-worth.

If you're still struggling with your emotions, it might be time to reach out to a counselor. They can provide you with strategies and techniques to help you manage your emotions and move forward.

### 4. Planning for the future

- Personal goals: Setting new personal goals and plans, whether for career development or personal growth, can give you something to look forward to and help you move on from past relationships.

When looking for a partner in the future, it's important to choose someone who meets your standards for healthy relationships. This means mutual respect, understanding, and support. Learn from past experiences and avoid repeating them.

Finally, remember that emotional release is a process. Don't rush it. Give yourself time and space to heal slowly.

Remember, everyone deserves to be loved and respected. Don't doubt your own worth just because a relationship didn't work out. The future is bright, as long as you're ready to move in a positive direction.