How can you respond to others rationally when you are holding back and feeling suffocated every time?

Hello!

You don't know if the other person is being sarcastic or honest, and it makes you feel uneasy. Practice imitating their reaction on purpose in private a few times to get this nerve/muscle/expression circuit flowing.

Practice letting the energy of wanting to retaliate flow without harming the other person.

"Hate yourself" and "deny yourself" seem like the questioner is directing the anger at herself. You can try just feeling the anger.

The hatred and self-denial is your grievance. Feel your sadness.

What do you think when you're around someone who talks a lot? Do you think they're powerful? Are they really?

Do you need to be submissive? What are you afraid of?

Are you worried about a breakup or afraid of being attacked? Think about why.

Your inner strength comes from the center of your abdomen. You can connect with your body and feel the strength it gives you. Don't let your brain deceive you.

See that you want to change and feel the emotions behind it. These emotions need your embrace and acceptance.

Best,

Hello, landlord. I have had a similar experience, and I empathize with your feelings.

When I was young, I had little interaction with others and was not good at talking, which resulted in a seemingly well-behaved personality. No matter what others said, whether good or bad, I took it all in and accepted it wholeheartedly. In fact, I'm not stupid. I can hear the contempt, teasing, and even sarcasm in their words, and I don't care.

I have done better than others as I grew up, yet I still have a habit of being passive when dealing with relatives and family members. I have also repeatedly pondered, like the original poster, why this is the case.

I have also been made to blush by what people have said to me, but I have responded in silence. Afterwards, I regretted why I didn't argue back at the time. I have summed up the main reasons as three points:

1. You have low self-esteem and are not confident in yourself. You subconsciously believe what other people say about you, and you let it affect you.

2. Mind what others think, and fear affecting the relationship. Most people who can say these things are relatives or people they know well, and they don't know how to strike back, worrying about affecting the relationship in the future. They should stop worrying and start standing up for themselves.

3. I am not used to arguing with others. I am inherently understanding and obedient, and I do not like to speak like the other person.

I have found, many years later, that this is not a problem. It is easy to argue with people, without any psychological burden, and life is so carefree!

First, overcome your inferiority complex. You'll naturally stop caring what others say.

Second, people who mock others are usually condescending. If you let them bully you, they'll have power over you. Stand up to them and show them you have power too. If they're not afraid of affecting the relationship, you shouldn't be either.

If he's afraid of affecting the relationship, you'll be greeted with a smile after you argue with him once or twice. Let's be frank: this is "cheap."

Third, don't be too rigid. Just take it as a joke. You argue with me, I argue with you, just for fun. It's not a matter of character. It's a matter of responding to the other person's joke.

When it comes to choosing content and how to say it to others to strike the right tone, I don't think there's any need to dwell on this too much. It's obvious that you should never say anything that's too harsh, but for anything else, as long as you say it with a smile, you can always say afterwards that it was just a joke.

Even if the other person is so embarrassed that they can't come down from the stage, you can just smile and say, "It was just a joke. Why are you angry?"

I'm right, aren't I? Don't be softhearted. Think about how others have teased you, and just treat it all as a joke!

If there's something we need to help each other with in the future, we should do it seriously. The worst that can happen is that someone doesn't appreciate your good deed. Or they may appear to appreciate it but not really.

It doesn't matter. The important thing is that we can live comfortably and happily with a clear conscience!

Good day, host.

I empathize with the challenges the host has faced in life and the frustration he experiences.

It is inevitable that we will encounter many such people and situations in our professional lives.

If we are required to care about him each time and respond to each comment, do we still have anyone in our lives who is willing to spend time with us?

The emotional distress we experience is often a result of our own internal vulnerabilities.

If we do not concern ourselves with the opinions of others, their opinions will not affect us.

Maintaining an attitude of "I don't care about any of your comments" will prevent a lot of unnecessary harm.

Furthermore, I would like to know how to respond to such sarcasm in an instant. I have previously attempted to fight back, but I am unsure of the best way to proceed.

We often find ourselves wishing we had responded in a more timely manner.

Subsequently, when confronted with a similar situation, we can respond promptly based on our previous experience.

Even if a response is not possible in a timely manner, it is important not to feel defeated. Silence can be an effective response in certain situations, and it can often be more powerful than a verbal reaction.

Secondly, in the event that a situation cannot be altered, it is necessary to consider modifying one's mindset.

Furthermore, it is important to avoid self-denial and suppressing one's own needs.

I avoid these individuals to prevent such occurrences.

However, at a fundamental level, we are reluctant to do so.

In such instances, I adopt a submissive and compliant demeanor.

I find this aspect of my personality particularly challenging. It has the potential to develop into an inferiority complex.

In the course of our careers, we will interact with numerous individuals. However, only a select few will be able to work effectively with us.

If the individual in question is not of significant importance, it is not necessary to be overly concerned with the attitudes of others.

If there is a possibility of a cordial relationship, it will be established. If the other party is excessively demanding, it is advisable to avoid them.

If I am unable to provoke, is there an alternative option?

What is the benefit of achieving a temporary mood if it results in the loss of goodwill from others?

It is neither necessary nor beneficial to attempt to please others or to belittle oneself.

Maintaining personal integrity is of paramount importance.

No matter how influential an individual may be, there will always be someone with greater authority.

Those who are unaware of their appropriate role may resort to aggressive behavior towards others.

In such cases, it is advisable to maintain a respectful and courteous demeanor while maintaining a professional distance.

It is important to maintain our own characteristics, neither humble nor arrogant.

We are not in a superior or inferior position to others.

In conclusion, I would like to extend my best wishes to the host for a happy and prosperous future.

I am pleased to extend my warmest regards to you all in the name of June, the world, and myself.

Hello!

We totally get where you're coming from. We've all been there! Let's take a look at your questions one by one:

We've all been there! Sometimes when you can't figure out the intention behind what someone has said, your first reaction will be to think that it is a sneer at you.

For example, when you are working hard on something, someone will say, "Wow, no wonder you graduated from such-and-such university."

It's possible that there's not much malice in such situations and that there might be a little jealousy. You might resent this and feel that it's mocking you. It could also be a projection of your inner feelings and a manifestation of your lack of self-confidence. It's also possible that similar words have activated the feelings of being very angry when you were mocked in junior high school. If you're struggling with these feelings, you can also seek professional help to deal with them.

In relationships, there's no need to become defensive or on constant alert, ready to fight back.

If you feel a bit uncomfortable with the first reaction to this type of remark, it's totally okay! Just consider the overall context. For example, you may really have done a great job, or you may have really graduated from a fantastic university. In that case, what someone else says makes total sense. Anyway, if you're not sure whether the other person is being malicious, it's best to laugh it off, remain neutral, or take it as a compliment and use it to boost your confidence!

2. How to deal with other people's sarcasm.

Just ignore it, sweetie.

Even if someone does mock us, there's no need to respond in kind.

For example, when eating with relatives, someone might say, "Oh, you don't even know the rules for eating a meal." If the person saying this is an older relative, they may not be being sarcastic, but just habitually nagging and pointing out faults. In fact, there's no need to respond to this, as it will affect the atmosphere of the meal. You can just ignore what they say, on the grounds that they are an older relative.

We can also go our own way, let them talk, save our mental energy, and do more important things, which may be more meaningful. This includes other people's sarcasm.

Humor and self-deprecation are great ways to defuse a tense situation!

We can also use humor or self-deprecating remarks to defuse the sarcasm of some people. This will not only prevent the situation from becoming too awkward, but also make you feel better. It can also be used as a lubricant for interpersonal relationships, and is the best way to sublimate.

It's okay to fight back!

If someone has crossed your line, you must stand up to them. First, take a deep breath and try to stay calm. It's okay to feel angry, but it's important to keep a cool head.

Secondly, keep your language short and sweet, be logical, and don't get into unnecessary arguments. For example, you can say, "So what?"

"I'm just that awesome (pretty...), there's nothing I can do about it," etc. Just remember, we don't want to attack the other person personally.

3. Here's a helpful tip on how to stay strong and stand your ground when faced with someone who is verbally aggressive.

It's so important to remember that true strength doesn't lie in a verbal battle. It lies in the outcome of actions. Once you understand this, you'll be able to stand your ground and not be intimidated by people who only care about winning a verbal battle.

It's not that you're submissive in front of such people that causes your inferiority complex. It's possible that you're a little bit inferior on the inside, which makes you submissive in front of these people. So first, try to overcome your inferiority complex and cultivate self-confidence.

I know it can be tough, but I'm here to tell you that the key to overcoming inferiority and cultivating self-confidence is to have more successful experiences and do things well. You've got this!

Second, when it comes to interacting with others, you can try to build your confidence in a few simple ways:

When you're speaking, try to look the other person in the eye. It can be scary at first, but you'll get used to it!

It's okay to feel embarrassed sometimes in social situations. It's not about being afraid to speak up, but rather learning to tolerate those moments. Remember, as long as you're not embarrassed, the other person is probably feeling the same way.

Speak with conviction and establish your own aura. When communicating with others, be neither servile nor arrogant. Don't be afraid to express yourself and be confident in your ability to refuse others if you need to.

When you establish this lovely, confident aura, you'll naturally no longer be subservient to anyone.

Just remember, it's not the words themselves that are powerful, it's the aura within.

I really hope the reply from Hongyu helps! Thank you so much for asking!

The original poster is seeking counsel on how to respond to the sarcasm of others. The following suggestions may prove helpful in addressing this issue.

First and foremost, it is imperative to respect one's own feelings.

Upon demonstrating a high level of effort, one may receive a remark such as, "It is evident why you graduated from a particular university."

It would be beneficial to ascertain the host's emotional state at the time. Was the host experiencing feelings of admiration or disdain?

In the event that the other individual is explicitly offering praise, it is appropriate to respond with gratitude.

In the event that the host perceives the other individual to be acting with ill intent, it is advisable to assert one's personal boundaries. This can be effectively achieved by stating, "I find your remarks to be highly discomforting. I request that you refrain from making such comments in my presence."

2. It is imperative to defend one's own rights.

In the context of relatives dining together, one might hear remarks such as, "It would seem that you are unaware of the established rules for dining."

This remark is clearly negative and suppressive in nature. It is not incumbent upon the host to accept comments that are detached from reality.

In response to this kind of suppression, it is possible to draw a clear line and state one's position. One might say, for example, "Perhaps your rules are different from mine, so why don't I tell your child my rules?" It is surely beneficial to learn from each other, and this is the polite thing to do.

Some individuals are only aware of the impropriety of their actions when they have already committed an offense.

3. A clear sense of boundaries

Given the considerable differences in upbringing, ideas, and positions that exist between individuals, it is often challenging for them to empathize with and adopt the perspective of another person.

The use of such assertive language serves to amplify the other person's sentiments and assertions. It establishes a parallel between their subjective experiences and those of the speaker.

In essence, the objective is to make the other person aware that there is a fundamental difference between you and them, and that you are a distinct individual. This necessitates creating a psychological and physical distance between you.

One may utilize universal formulas such as:

My thoughts are distinct from yours. One may introduce their own rules, politeness, feelings, and suggestions to the discussion.

Such discourse evokes a profound sense of unease and discomfort. The manner of communication, the visual cues, the verbal expressions, and the evaluative stance all contribute to this sentiment.

In the event of encountering an argumentative individual, it is advisable to conclude the discussion.

The host is interested in practicing this mode of expression, beginning with those in their immediate vicinity, attaining proficiency, enhancing their sensitivity to their own emotions, safeguarding themselves with their own feelings, upholding self-belief, eschewing self-doubt, and regarding their feelings as their most effective safeguard.

Hello, I'm Starfish Floater. I haven't been to the Q&A area for a week because I've been busy. Your question is the first one I've seen. I'm a psychology intern at Yi Xinli. I'm happy to answer your question and thank you for asking.

Let me help. I think you're studying psychology.

1. "You graduated from a university."

This is the way it is. Don't pay attention to it.

Smile confidently and he'll back down.

He mocks you because he's not sure you should earn so much.

This person looks down on you. They feel you shouldn't earn that much.

He thinks your income isn't proportional to your work. He thinks he's better at work than you.

Why do you earn more than he does? Smile confidently and he'll back down.

The second time you encounter this, don't fight back. Just express her thoughts.

You'll leave him speechless. Just say, "Where does this sour taste come from?"

"Why does it taste so sweet?"

She's just jealous. So what if you're jealous?

This is my confidence.

I work hard and get paid well.

2. "You don't know the rules of eating a meal."

It depends on who says it. Usually, it's elders and relatives.

The person saying this is just feeling bad. They see that you're more educated and capable than their children.

They'll find something you're not as good at to make themselves feel better. As a junior, there's no need to point this out.

Say, "Your cousin's family has good table manners. Auntie, please teach me too."

"Let me not be in your way when I eat in front of you next time."

You'll feel better because what you say may not be what you mean.

Use the opposite word.

Say they're your peers, your brother and sister-in-law.

For example, "Brother, sister-in-law."

Let's see less of each other! I can't bring these rules to the table.

Don't do a bad job. Don't affect your nieces' and nephews' upbringing.

This is for relatives who envy you for going to college and having a good job.

They can't even ask for your help.

They really want your help. They need to support their children.

You feel bitter inside. Why don't you have social status?

That's why they point fingers at you. If you make a mistake, they'll make it seem worse.

This has led to your current situation. Some have low self-esteem and self-respect.

3. I don't know if they're being sarcastic or not.

The above two sentences are meant to mock and express envy.

Some people are afraid that others are doing better than them. That's why they say things like this.

They won't express their anger with outsiders. But with close friends and acquaintances, they'll try to find ways to feel superior to people who are better than them.

The two scenarios you described will happen.

You can laugh it off.

Or you respond calmly and use indirect language.

If he's being sarcastic, respond calmly.

If he just behaves normally, he'll feel bad.

If you hit back, it won't hurt.

He has no malicious intent, so he won't hurt himself. An old saying goes, "A tiger hurts people because people hurt the tiger's heart."

The tiger didn't mean to hurt humans.

Humans hunt and kill tigers for their own reasons.

4. I was mocked in middle school. I didn't fight back, which left a shadow in my heart.

You're still in that shadow.

Middle school is when you become an adult. If you're hurt then, it can stay with you forever.

I hug you. I can feel your fear.

Adolescence is hard for everyone. No matter how well-off or poor a child's family is, they will be left with some psychological scars.

You're more serious about it. You've been treated like this more than once.

If there's a chance, please describe what happened in middle school.

Why? And what happened?

Who? What?

Do you remember what that person said or did?

If you remember, you can see a psychologist.

Go and fix it.

5. I didn't know how to respond when I was mocked. Now I want to know how to respond and want to change.

I was teased a lot in high school. Why?

Or have you made a mistake and been mocked? Is it because you have been mocked so many times that you are becoming more and more withdrawn?

Is that right? Even the teacher didn't help.

You could say you were bullied at school. Am I right?

How do you fight back?

It depends on the problem and who is being sarcastic.

You can learn how to respond. Based on your current state,

You need to be confident and change your mindset before you can respond to mockery.

A positive mindset helps you ignore sarcasm.

There's no need to fight back. Sarcasm is disrespectful, and you're right to feel that way.

6. You want to learn how to respond right away. If you can't, improving your mindset is also fine.

A confident smile is the best comeback.

This confident smile is the most powerful comeback.

It involves sarcasm and a dismissive attitude.

This is an effective way to get back at a cynic.

Learn to smile confidently. It's a powerful weapon. How do you learn to smile confidently?

Wash your face every morning and smile at yourself in the mirror.

Practice until you're happy with the result. Don't practice all day.

Practice every morning and be consistent. You will learn to smile and be confident.

Start with your behavior.

You are an individual. Don't depend on anyone. Learn to distinguish between strength and words.

People with strong tongues have no strength. Your clothes will suffer if you hang out with them.

Good words can offend. Such people are ignorant and fearless.

Anyone can be offended by him. You stand behind her.

Then he may be used as a shield. If you want to change your mindset,

Start with yourself. Know you're an independent person with your own thoughts, personality, and logic.

Believe in yourself. You can do anything. That classmate who bullied you is grown up.

You can do it yourself.

Tell yourself this every day. Comfort yourself before bed.

You'll be yourself again soon.

You hate this version of yourself. You feel inferior.

Your family of origin and your parents' education and environment affect you.

There's also a generation gap between feudal and modern society. Feudal education methods are still around.

They might also be submissive to the new society, which will affect you. You need your parents' encouragement.

Let your parents praise you. Tell them about your childhood.

Why? Unlock the knot in your heart.

Being mocked is not bad. It may be because you are so good that people mock you.

People who mock others are also healing themselves.

You don't have to feel inferior. You're more capable than you think.

Look at yourself and your team.

Which of these strengths are yours? Do you have any credit for them?

Know what you did well and you'll improve.

I wish you freedom. Come back to the beautiful world.

Greetings, question asker.

First, it would be beneficial to provide yourself with a degree of emotional comfort from a distance, as a means of soothing the overly sensitive heart that has been subjected to ridicule and mockery. This heart is currently experiencing a state of confusion and doubt.

It is reasonable to posit that you experience feelings of aggrievement and resentment.

It would be interesting to ascertain whether the subject has become aware of their considerable inner strength and perceptive awareness. It is likely that the subject is aware that when they are subjected to criticism, they experience a distinct sense of inner strength and resilience.

The inner anger, helplessness, and desire to attack in retaliation emerge when one is subjected to criticism or attack.

Previously, the defensive mechanisms activated by the intense ridicule you endured rendered you particularly susceptible to emotional distress.

It can be posited that the most significant internal distress experienced at this time is the desire to be able to respond in a more tactful manner when subjected to the cold violence of others (sarcasm).

At that juncture, it would be possible to respond in a more tactful manner. The aforementioned "one tooth for one tooth, one report for one report" is an effective means of releasing pent-up anger and resentment.

Conversely, it appears that the individual subjected to the abuse exhibits a numb, sluggish, and helpless demeanor during moments of anger.

As a result, the individual in question will always be one beat slower than the aggressor, experiencing resentment and feelings of helplessness. This can lead to self-blame for perceived incompetence.

Furthermore, this can result in a loss of strength.

What is the most effective method for disrupting this pattern?

First, it is necessary to determine whether this sensitive reaction is acquired or innate.

If it is acquired, it may be related to the family background in early years and the harsh criticism and blame from parents during growth.

Additionally, further explanation is provided below:

It is possible that your nurturer (parents or other family members) was a demanding individual who was habitually sarcastic with you, and you frequently

The suppression of this aspect of the grievance and anger over time gives rise to the formation of the most sensitive and hostile part of one's inner world, which is then projected.

This results in the projection of these emotions externally, which manifests as empathy.

Furthermore, when an individual encounters a person who attacks or criticizes them in a similar manner, they experience discomfort.

The seeds of hatred that were previously suppressed are now activated, prompting a desire to lash out at the individual in question. However, the reality is that the individual lacks the strength to engage in a physical altercation, leading to an even greater sense of defeat.

In the event of acquisition, the sarcastic attack power of this group of people attracts and activates the aforementioned desire to attack.

However, the reality is that they are unable to internalize and assimilate this aspect of themselves due to their own internal fortitude, and thus, they are compelled to transform it.

This results in feelings of self-reproach and guilt, which further exacerbate the individual's sense of misery.

The question thus arises as to how one might disrupt this pattern.

The determining factor is whether one's inner personality is stable and whether one's emotions are stable.

Given that an individual's inner emotional state may fluctuate significantly and that they may be irritable, even the slightest external stimulus may evoke a strong emotional response.

Such a response is sufficient to elicit a surge of intense emotions, resulting in feelings of distress and unease.

It is to be expected that when he encounters people in his daily life, they may be joking, and that ordinary people will not perceive any problem.

However, individuals with unstable emotional and personality traits are prone to immediate anger projection, perceiving any slight provocation as an insult, attack, or harm.

Such actions elicit a response of insult, attack, and harm, thereby instigating a desire to retaliate.

Secondly, if one is typically a person with a stable mood and personality, as well as excellent interpersonal relationships,

If one encounters individuals who consistently engage in the derision of others, it is indicative of a proclivity for hostility and a tendency toward emotional fragility.

It is imperative that one maintain a respectful distance from such individuals.

It is advisable to maintain a certain distance from such individuals, as doing otherwise may result in undesirable consequences. Once one has incurred the disfavor of another, it is possible that heated debates and unpleasant language may ensue, potentially leading to more serious issues.

Such individuals may become enraged and lash out, causing unintended harm. In essence, it could be a seemingly inconsequential matter that causes them distress throughout the day.

Once more, it is essential to differentiate between the circumstances and the individuals involved. Which individuals are driven by curiosity, and which by encouragement?

What are the nature of the jokes? What is the underlying motive behind the sarcasm?

To illustrate, during the holiday season, when one visits relatives at the dinner table and some individuals become aware of one's status as a university student,

Such individuals may, in fact, be driven by genuine curiosity and envy. In this case, the individual in question is a university student.

Similarly, when one first begins employment and colleagues express admiration, it is not uncommon for the response to be, "No wonder you graduated from university!"

Additionally, there are individuals who are inherently harsh and deceptive. These individuals may lack a university education and harbor feelings of envy and jealousy.

Such individuals may also exhibit a proclivity for expressing negative sentiments, particularly if they perceive a discrepancy between one's actions and their perceived level of knowledge or expertise. In such instances, they may be inclined to vocalize their disapproval, as evidenced by the following example: "You're still in college, and you don't even know the rules!"

In the event of encountering such individuals, it is possible to adopt a conciliatory approach, acknowledging missteps and demonstrating vulnerability. This can be conveyed promptly and directly, as follows:

I am grateful for your counsel and will endeavor to learn from it.

Furthermore, there are individuals who are deliberately seeking conflict. If the aforementioned person is of a similar standing

In the event that one encounters an individual who is deliberately sarcastic, it is imperative to respond in a firm and assertive manner.

Your recent remarks were highly disrespectful. It is my opinion that you lack the requisite qualifications and justification to engage in such behavior.

If the individual in question is a leader, the situation may be perceived differently.

In conclusion, it is important to note that learning to express one's emotions in a timely manner, particularly when one is subjected to criticism and feels aggrieved, is crucial for effective communication.

It is important to be assertive and to communicate clearly to the other person that their actions are causing you discomfort and that you do not feel respected.

It should be noted that the above analysis and suggestions are for reference only, given the limited nature of the data involved.

I am Dr. Yao, and I am available to provide further assistance and guidance as needed.

Good day, I am pleased to make your acquaintance.

It is not uncommon to experience feelings of discomfort when encountering individuals who display a cynical outlook. Such interactions can have a significant impact on both professional and personal aspects of one's life, often leading to feelings of irritation and depression.

What is the best way to handle this situation?

First, determine whether the other person is being sarcastic. Analyze the situation, the other person's identity, and the consequences.

For example, "No wonder you graduated from such-and-such university." This remark may also contain praise, and different individuals may have varying interpretations. The sentence in question could be perceived as expressing envy, jealousy, or praise.

If a relative were to say, "Look at that, they don't even know the rules for having a meal," I would consider it to be disrespectful.

Such individuals fail to consider the feelings of others or the situation at hand. They simply vocalize whatever comes to mind, operating under the assumption that they are the most intelligent person in the room.

It is likely that individuals who express derisive sentiments and make disparaging remarks about the lives, work, and circumstances of others are experiencing a degree of personal distress.

In such instances, it may be advisable to disengage from the situation and refrain from engaging with the individual in question. This can be achieved by both physically distancing oneself from the individual and mentally disassociating from their words and actions.

We adhere to a strict code of conduct and do not allow others to influence our decisions.

Secondly, I am unsure how to respond and I am experiencing a strong negative emotion. At this time, I recommend that you learn from Premier Zhou Enlai's collection of witty responses to people.

In conclusion, your abilities and inner strength will continue to grow stronger. The influence of these individuals will diminish.

The causes of low self-esteem can be attributed to external influences and personal factors. While it is not feasible to alter the opinions of others instantaneously, there is a possibility to gradually enhance one's own self-esteem.

I hope you have a happy life and are able to maintain your composure in the face of external influences.

I would like to conclude by wishing you good health.

I would like to conclude by wishing you good health.

Good day, landlord. I have read your account and empathize with your situation. When one encounters verbal abuse, it is natural to want to respond in kind. However, the lack of a clear starting point can make one feel uncertain and ill at ease. It is understandable that your experiences have caused you distress. I hope that by sharing my own experiences, I can provide some insight and inspiration.

In contemporary society, the adage "kind are bullied, the patient are ridden" is a familiar refrain. The circumstances you have described align precisely with this proverbial wisdom.

Additionally, the adage "When to hold back, hold back; when to act, act" has been referenced.

Indeed, when one is required to tolerate, it is imperative to release one's emotions. This is the fundamental tenet of emotional management for a mature individual, particularly one who has attained a profound understanding of its intricacies.

What is the understanding of forbearance?

This is the foundation of forbearance. In the absence of clearly defined principles and bottom lines for navigating interpersonal relationships, retreating and compromising without consideration for one's own dignity as a person ultimately leads to detrimental consequences.

In what manner should it be employed? When one feels the need to express one's emotions, one should do so.

In interpersonal relationships, it is insufficient to merely tolerate one's emotions. At times, understanding the principles of emotional management and releasing pent-up emotions at an appropriate juncture is not only beneficial for one's physical and mental well-being, but it can also serve to make emotions a driving force.

When others persist in transgressing one's personal boundaries and one maintains a stoic demeanor, it conveys a lack of assertiveness and resilience, which may embolden the transgressor to continue their actions.

In the event that others exceed the boundaries of one's established principles and persist in their actions, it is imperative to express one's anger in a clear and assertive manner. This serves to communicate to the other party that one's principles are not negotiable and must be upheld.

In the event that an individual makes an inappropriate remark, it is imperative to convey to the speaker that such comments are unacceptable and that they should refrain from repeating them.

In the event that an individual makes a remark that is perceived as cold or sarcastic, it is advisable to respond with a clear and assertive "no."

In the event that an individual is attempting to engage in humor with you, it is advisable to inform them that the joke is not amusing and that it has the effect of encroaching upon their personal boundaries. It is recommended that you refrain from repeating this action in the future, as it may result in a loss of composure on your part and a subsequent embarrassment for both parties.

It is therefore incumbent upon the host to pay close attention and to establish clear principles and limits for themselves. When others exceed these limits, it is imperative to speak up and demand an apology.

It is important to convey to others that you adhere to a set of principles and values. If you are joking, you can politely request that the humor be taken down a notch.

It is my hope that these thoughts will prove useful to you.

#Hello, I'm Gu Yi. I'm modest and unassuming, and I'm proud of it.

Just be yourself.

It's tough to deal with when you're being judged by others. You know you're not like that, and you're a sunny person inside. You know you can be confident, but you only realize in the end that you've started to set limits on yourself because of what others say. It's painful, and over time, depression and inferiority are common.

Dear OP, You can't control what other people say, but you can decide what you hear. There are a lot of noises in the world, and the more you care about it, the more difficult it is to extricate yourself. As the OP mentioned in the description, you can either fight back or adjust your mentality.

Arguing with someone affects our mood. We argue back because the other person's words show contempt and misunderstanding. We want to prove we're not bullied. But getting angry is a punishment for ourselves. We can adjust.

♥About what other people say:

It's a simple fact that not everyone in this world has our best interests at heart. The majority of people are driven by a desire to see others suffer. Even if you are the epitome of virtue, there will always be those who think otherwise. Life is complex, and there are many forces at play. It's not realistic to expect to please everyone. Instead, focus on aligning with those who share your values and goals.

Listen to what others say. You've been mocked before, so when you hear something you don't like, don't take it personally. Chinese culture is profound and deep. If a sentence is related to you, it's related. If not, it's not.

While Dong Yuhui was broadcasting live, someone kept swiping "Ugly as hell, still broadcasting live" on the public screen. This was not the first time Dong Yuhui had been attacked for his appearance, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. However, it was probably the harshest. Nevertheless, Dong Yuhui has remained calm and collected. You can't change other people's minds, but you can change your own thoughts and concepts.

I wish you the best.

Hello, host!

Hi, I'm Li Xuan, a psychological counselor.

I'm so happy you're feeling confused and I admire your courage in sharing.

"Wow, I went to the same university as you!"

"Oh my, you don't even know the rules when you eat, do you?"

It can be so tricky to know how to respond to these kinds of comments. We might wonder if the person is being sarcastic or if they just have a different take on things.

I totally get it. It's not easy to judge something like this. And it's true, the same sentence, expressed in a different atmosphere and tone of voice, has a

I totally get it! And because you've had a similar experience, you're more sensitive to it.

We all know people who are always looking for flaws in others. It can be really uncomfortable and make us feel like we're not being respected. But sometimes

We often put up with this kind of thing because we care about other people's feelings and we want to keep our relationships intact.

It's true that change doesn't happen overnight. But there is a method you can try that might help! When others reject you, you can ask yourself internally, "Am I really like what he/she said?"

When others affirm you, you can say to yourself, "Yes, that's me! I'm just that good." After a little practice, you'll be saying it with confidence!

And when your heart is strong enough, you'll be able to face others' comments on you with confidence and openness.

I really hope I can provide you with a different perspective!

I'll always be here for you, my friend.

I'm sending you lots of love and wishes for a speedy recovery!

First, I'd like to know how to respond to sarcasm from others. I want to fight back, but I don't know how to change.

You can't learn to instantly respond to others' sarcasm overnight. First, you must stabilize your own emotions. When someone says something, don't lose control. What's going through your mind is what the other person meant by what they said. Know that your life is none of anyone else's business and that no one else has the right to tell you what to do. If someone is being malicious, respond in the same tone of voice as them. If they say, "Wow, no wonder you graduated from a certain university," just say, "Wow, I guess you didn't even graduate from junior high school."

Those things that make you feel uncomfortable are not good for you. Don't dwell on them. You are responsible for your own life. You don't need to explain yourself to others. Let them talk. Make yourself strong. No one can shake your resolve with their words. Focus on what you should do and the people you should care about.

Second, if you can't change it, your mentality needs to change. You keep negating yourself like this.

You're almost suppressing yourself.

Watch Papi Jiang's videos. She posts videos of strange and nonsensical things that happen in life that make people feel uncomfortable. They're relieving to watch. Participate in the comments. You'll find many people who feel the same way as you. See how other people respond.

Hello, dear questioner!

We all feel a bit hurt when we're mocked, but it's just part of life.

It's so important to respond immediately and tactfully. It might feel good to say something back, but the discomfort of being mocked will still be there. The next time someone says something similar, it will make you feel angry again, as you will naturally think that they are talking about you again.

There are so many kinds of sarcasm! For example, "Wow, no wonder you graduated from such-and-such university" might sound a little bit sour at first, but it's probably just because they recognize you and feel a little threatened. At this time, you should just happily accept it and laugh it off! Your relatives saying, "Look at you, you don't even know the rules at a meal," might make you feel a little uncomfortable. It's possible that you actually care about this yourself, or it's possible that you are good at other things so they are picking on you in this area.

So don't make generalizations. If someone mocks me, I don't have to mock them back. Just respond to the situation, okay?

There's just one more thing I'm not sure about. You said, "As long as someone who is verbally aggressive is in front of me, I will act submissively and obediently. I hate this about myself."

I can see that you're not very proactive in integrating yourself into the groups around you, classmates, colleagues, and even loved ones. I can also see that you're too concerned about what others think of you, and you're prone to labeling yourself.

I just wanted to say, be more open-minded! Accept the good and the not-so-good in yourself. Try to integrate more into your environment and see more of the good in others. And remember, agreeing with and affirming others does not mean you are "yes-saying and no-doing."

I really hope this helps!

I extend my support to the individual who posed the question. Your description resonates with me, as I recall a similar experience from my youth. I was, as you have observed, somewhat reticent in my speech. When confronted with sarcasm or assertive but unreasonable behavior, I was inclined to respond, yet my emotional distress often impeded my ability to articulate a coherent response. Alternatively, I might silently endure the situation or, despite my internal discomfort, acquiesce to the other party's viewpoint. I recall instances where I was so enraged that I felt compelled to lash out. I invested significant effort behind the scenes to avoid being wronged. I offer the following suggestions for your consideration:

An individual who speaks rapidly may appear to have a quick response, but their depth of thinking is often insufficient. While we all speak at a slower pace and are not quick-witted, we possess a significant advantage: our ability to reflect on ourselves, to consider the implications of our actions, and to inquire further into the underlying reasons for our assumptions.

Thus, when one focuses on the strengths of individuals like us, one's self-confidence is enhanced. We do not succumb to envy of those who are adept at verbal confrontation, nor do we cower in their presence. Instead, we are confident in our own abilities. However, this strength is often misunderstood by others. The general public's perception of a strong individual is someone who can speak eloquently and argue convincingly. This is why, in recent years, popular dramas like "Story of Yanxi Palace" have emerged.

At times, we may find ourselves envying others, while simultaneously failing to acknowledge our own advantages, which can ultimately lead to feelings of inferiority.

Accordingly, the initial step is to identify one's strengths and bolster self-confidence. It is recommended to maintain a daily journal. When confronted with a disagreement or observe others engaged in such a discussion, it is beneficial to record one's immediate emotional and emotional responses, document one's diverse perspectives, and record the opinions of others, including one's own. While immediate reactions may be suppressed, it is valuable to subsequently reflect on and articulate one's opinions. This process allows for the synthesis and elaboration of ideas.

To illustrate, if an individual were to assert during the day that another lacks knowledge of table manners, the latter could analyze the situation in their diary at night. This would entail determining the rationale behind the assertion and whether it was accurate. It would also necessitate an examination of the individual's thoughts and emotions at the time.

One must consider whether the individual in question is genuinely lacking in knowledge of table manners, or if a misunderstanding has occurred.

What was the source of your embarrassment? Did you truly lack knowledge of etiquette, or was it because your relatives were not treating you with respect that you felt ashamed, or was it because you were in a challenging situation that you did not express at the time, leading to misunderstandings?

What aspects of your character require enhancement? What type of individual is your relative?

What insights did you gain about him as a result of this occurrence? How would you assess his overall character, taking into account his previous conduct and attitude towards you?

It would be beneficial to ascertain whether this relative is someone with whom one can develop a close relationship. If not, it would be helpful to determine how one plans to interact with them in the future and how often.

What attitude should be adopted towards the individual in question? Should a certain degree of distance be maintained?

Alternatively, is it merely a polite response, or is it due to his candid nature that you are inclined to solicit further counsel from him?

After a thorough examination and evaluation of the aforementioned information, it is my contention that your rationality has been reinstated, your emotions will subside, and you will no longer be troubled by the anger and embarrassment of the day. Once you recognize that you can learn from and gain something from an event, you will no longer be distressed by it. Instead, it will illuminate a previously untapped source of insight, and the majority of your pent-up anger will dissipate.

If one were to peruse literature pertaining to introverts and individuals with high levels of sensitivity, one would discover that such individuals tend to exhibit a certain degree of shyness and a reluctance to engage in conflict with others. Even when confronted with statements or actions that are perceived as unreasonable, they often refrain from openly expressing their thoughts, emotions, and feelings. This can lead to a sense of internalized pressure and a tendency to self-isolate.

In the event of encountering an unreasonable individual and being unable to formulate a response, the following advice is offered:

The initial step is to harbor negative sentiments toward the other individual, subsequently conveying these feelings through a gaze that is both discernible and unambiguous. This gaze may manifest as contempt, disdain, or a serene smile, contingent upon the nature of the individual in question.

In essence, the most detrimental outcome for a person who employs a smart-aleck demeanor is that the other person does not respond to their provocation. This is not because they have been outwitted, but rather because we are disinclined to engage with them. This is the most damaging outcome for them and will evoke a strong negative emotional response. Therefore, by understanding the inner world of a person who employs a smart-aleck demeanor, one can effectively neutralize their influence.

2. In the event that one wishes to interject a remark, yet is uncertain of the precise nature of the remark to make, it is advisable to make a remark that will leave the other person speechless. This is an efficacious method of immediately silencing the other person and preventing them from speaking further. One such remark is, "You're right, just be happy."

This sentence is equally effective as the initial example. An individual who relishes a spirited debate is most disconcerted by the abrupt cessation of discourse and the abrupt disregard of the other party. This evokes a sense of isolation and invisibility, as though they are merely speaking to themselves. Such a response often elicits feelings of humiliation.

3. In the case of particularly irksome individuals, it is advisable to adopt a direct approach. The most effective form of defense is to confront the source of the problem directly. If the other person has already transgressed a personal boundary, it is important to communicate this in a clear and assertive manner. This will not only help to resolve the immediate issue but will also contribute to the development of self-confidence. Repeating this process a few times will help to reinforce the ability to express one's boundaries. The key message is simple: "Your words make me uncomfortable, so please refrain from continuing. I do not wish to engage in this discussion." Once this has been communicated, it is advisable to disengage from the situation.

Furthermore, this enables the individual to establish their psychological boundaries and limits with others, indicating that they are not to be taken advantage of and that they will not tolerate mistreatment. Over time, others will cease to belittle the individual's feelings.

4. Should one identify a superior strategy for addressing individuals who elicit discomfort, one may engage in a mental rehearsal, akin to a cinematic production. In this exercise, one assumes the roles of director and screenwriter, reimagining the narrative and dialogue. Repeated rehearsals facilitate the ability to effectively utilize this strategy in future confrontations. Many National Basketball Association players employ a similar approach, mentally rehearsing the upcoming game, contemplating potential scenarios, and formulating responses to unexpected situations.

"Brain simulation" represents a significant avenue for acquiring new knowledge.

It is recommended that the reader engage with high-quality, well-rated content, such as popular dramas or novels featuring strong female or male protagonists. These works offer the dual benefit of entertainment and the opportunity to develop skills such as effective communication, critical thinking, and emotional regulation. For instance, the protagonist in "Zhen Huan Zhuan" exemplifies these attributes, providing a source of inspiration for personal growth.

I have previously employed these strategies and observed some degree of efficacy. It is my hope that you will find them useful as well.

It is my hope that you will no longer experience depression in the future, but rather, become open, honest, and clear-headed, and no longer be bothered by unnecessary people who pollute your life. It is important to identify your own strengths, utilize them fully, and recognize yourself first.

It is important to note that when an individual has achieved a state of self-recognition, the words of others that are intended to slander or belittle them will not have the same impact. The individuals in question will perceive themselves to be the target of arrows, but in reality, the arrows will merely turn into feathers upon reaching the individual and float gently in front of them before falling.

I extend my best wishes to you.

Good day, dear questioner. I am Yang Yiqing, a listener on the Yiyi Psychology platform.

I would like to talk with you about your problem, if you would allow me the opportunity to do so. I hope to be able to offer you some warm company and help.

From your description, it seems that you may have a tendency to internalize your emotions, particularly negative ones. It's as if there's a block in your throat that prevents you from expressing yourself fully. Once you do speak up, it's as if a floodgate opens, and you feel overwhelmed by the rush of emotions. It's understandable that you might be afraid of losing control in such situations. Over time, you may have learned to suppress this part of your anger.

From the two problem-solving aspects you mentioned, it seems you have devoted a great deal of thought to this issue. This indicates a certain insight into your own heart and emotions. It could also be said that your thinking is inward, which suggests that you may be a person who suppresses their thoughts deep inside.

We would like to suggest that there are two aspects to consider in order to address this issue.

1. Mindset

Your attitude plays a significant role in shaping your perception of situations and how you process them.

First, it seems that you may be projecting negativity onto other people's words. That is, when someone says something, you unconsciously attach a negative psychological effect to it, and feel that the person is being sarcastic.

And what might we observe occurring in this process?

Could it be that the other person is not being sarcastic, but that your internal language processing is causing you to feel that way?

To gain clarity on this matter, it would be helpful to identify the specific source of your distress. This may require some introspection or the guidance of a professional counselor.

Because this point is actually your core problem, it may have an impact beyond your "overreaction" in this matter, and could potentially manifest itself in other ways elsewhere.

Secondly, it would be beneficial to consider your attitude towards anger. Even when you are confronted with genuine cynicism and you feel angry, it may be helpful to reflect on why you want to fight back.

For this reason, it might be helpful to consider some strategies for managing anger. Some potential points to reflect on could be:

Could you please share what your feelings are when you encounter the anger of someone close to you?

If I may enquire, when you were angry and lost your temper before, what was the attitude of the people around you?

After you have expressed your frustration, how do you react and provide feedback? Do you feel satisfied with your response, or do you hold yourself accountable?

Your unconscious behavior when facing anger may be influenced by whether you avoid or accept anger. It is possible that your attitude towards anger may be affected by your childhood environment or past experiences that have led you to avoid angry emotions.

It may be helpful to consider whether there are places you could go to heal.

I would like to suggest that anger is a normal emotion. If you can learn to use the power of anger well, it will help you to feel more at ease in life.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider expressing your true self. From your description, it seems that you may be holding back from doing so, which could be contributing to your feelings of being afraid to be with those who are very straightforward.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider what you are avoiding and what you are afraid of at this point.

2. Suggestions and Methods

With regard to your first point, "How to instantly respond to such sarcasm from others," I would like to suggest the following methods for your consideration:

You might consider trying some new and challenging behaviors (as long as they're safe). It may help to practice courage, which could mean reminding yourself that you can do things you were afraid to do before, and that it's okay.

It might be helpful to try communicating more controversial topics with others and expressing your true thoughts. You could also try expressing your inner feelings by expressing your true thoughts.

You might consider trying debate as an activity. It could help you to improve your reaction speed and urge to express yourself.

I would like to suggest a book that I think you might find helpful: "The Courage to Be Disliked." Even if you know that your words may cause conflict, it is still important to speak your mind. Having the courage to be disliked is an important quality to develop.

It might be helpful to try expressing unpleasant opinions calmly. There is nothing wrong with having strong opinions.

I wish you the best!

If I can be of any assistance, please do not hesitate to ask. I wish you all the best in your endeavours!