How to adjust your mindset and become relaxed and comfortable in the dormitory?

Hello, let me give you a hug. I'm Shu Ya-Ching-Cheng, and I'd like to share my thoughts with you.

A dormitory is a place where you can rest your body and mind. Do you feel conflicted inside because you can't feel at ease with yourself despite feeling that there are problems with interpersonal relationships? I'm here for you.

You're in a position to be self-aware of your inner feelings and needs, recognize your own problems, and apply what you've learned in psychology to pursue self-growth. You're doing great!

01. The start of a new semester is a new stage in your studies and life. So if you often feel nostalgic for the past, you might still be focusing half of your attention on the past and not fully enjoying the present.

Alfred Adler, the founder of individual psychology, once said that all human troubles come from our relationships with other people.

It's okay if you're feeling confused and worried about facing a new stage of life and various relationships. It's something a lot of people experience, and it's normal. Try to accept and allow it, and it will change with learning and growing.

In other words, try to accept what you like and dislike about yourself, and focus on learning, self-awareness, self-care, and self-growth. It's important to put yourself first in all relationships. As for relationships with others, it's okay to take your time.

If you don't love yourself, who will? That goes for liking someone else's front too. It's about liking and caring for yourself, allowing and recognizing yourself, and accepting yourself.

If not now, then when?

It's great that you're recognizing the problem and taking steps to solve it. Growth is a continuous process, and it's wonderful that the relationship has eased up a bit. It seems like you've made a lot of adjustments and grown a lot, which is fantastic!

Just take your time.

02. It's possible that there are some essential aspects of growth that are overlooked, such as courage, openness, and kindness.

So we end up in a bit of a conflict between the "self that is demanded" and the "self that is felt."

So, try to understand your true feelings and needs, give yourself a hug, and give yourself the strength to resolve the conflict between these two parts so that they support and nourish each other, rather than ignoring and repressing them.

Similarly, you should also give yourself a break and accept the vulnerable, tense, and inferior parts of yourself because you also have many strong, courageous, and confident parts. This is the real and complete you. Treating your imperfect self gently and being grateful for your imperfections will make you more powerful and courageous to be your true and comfortable self.

03. Invest in your body and mind so you can think for yourself, be your own person, and love yourself. When you love yourself, it comes across to others.

When you're feeling nervous or uncomfortable, you can take a moment to press pause, take a few deep breaths, give yourself a smile and a hug, and just stay with your emotions for a while. You can also try mindfulness meditation and mindfulness writing to calm yourself down.

You might want to check out some psychology books on personal growth and interpersonal relationships, like "The Courage to Be Disliked," "Have a Life You Control," and "The Art of Communication."

I hope this helps, and that the world and I love you.

Hello, girl. You're confused, and I'm here to help.

You are experiencing some interpersonal problems. I am here to help.

You can't relax in the dormitory right now because of the minor conflict with your previous roommate.

Your relationship with your current roommate may be better, but you're still afraid and anxious. Will you have the same experience with your other roommates as you did with your previous roommate?

You can't relax and feel at ease because you were hurt by your roommate.

That would be a traumatic experience for you.

You have to face it and deal with it.

Otherwise, you will never be able to relax and feel at ease in the dormitory.

You need to decide what you're going to do now.

You need to seek help from the university's resident psychologist and let her formally deal with the minor conflict you had with your former roommate.

The university's psychological counselor should provide free services.

If there is no psychology teacher at the university, you can seek help from a professional psychological counselor.

Students get 50% off the platform's consultations.

Fill out the form and submit your school certificate as a current student.

Once you've resolved the previous minor conflict with your roommate, you'll get along with the other roommates. It won't be as tense as it is now.

I am confident that the problem you are facing will be resolved soon.

That's all I have to say.

I am the answer, and I study hard every day. I hope my above answer is helpful and inspiring to you, the girl.

Here at Yixinli, we love you and the world loves you too. Best wishes!