How to express oneself when one dare not face their own feelings?

It is understandable that you may feel uneasy about your feelings and may even avoid facing them. Everyone has their own way of dealing with their feelings, and this can be both a strength and a weakness. Sometimes it is a strength to protect yourself when you fail an exam, because it protects you. However, the inability to face your feelings can also affect your ability to express yourself. Here are some suggestions that may be helpful:

1. You might consider trying to express your feelings in writing. Writing down your feelings can help you to clarify your thoughts and may help you to express yourself better.

2. Consider seeking support. Talking to friends, family, or a counselor about your feelings may be helpful. They may be able to provide valuable feedback to help you express yourself better.

3. Allow yourself the time you need: It may be challenging to express your feelings initially. It may be beneficial to allow yourself time to adapt and practice.

4. Find the right way: If you're unsure of how to express your feelings, you might consider starting with a simple, clear description of the situation and then gradually working towards expressing your feelings in more detail.

It is important to remember that everyone has the right to express their feelings, and it is perfectly normal to seek help and support when needed.

It may be helpful to try to find a way to express yourself that feels right to you, and to give yourself time and space to adapt and grow.

Greetings, questioner. I can discern the confusion you are currently experiencing. I extend my support and encouragement to you.

What is the rationale behind the apprehension to confront one's emotions?

This may be related to past experiences.

It is plausible that you attempted to verbalize your authentic emotions during your formative years, yet encountered impediments from your familial unit, potentially including your parents.

Consequently, you have been apprehensive about articulating your sentiments since that time.

The underlying rationale is that, in the absence of expression, the risk of further hurt is mitigated.

This can be understood as an instinctive self-defense mechanism of the body.

This may be related to the concept of the "inner child."

It is possible that your "inner child" is still situated within the "childhood state."

The human psyche exhibits a capacity to oscillate between three distinct states: the "child state," the "parent state," and the "adult state."

For further insight into these three states, I would suggest reading the classic text, Mr. Toad Goes to the Psychiatrist.

In the future, you may choose to inform yourself that you have matured and are now capable of articulating your authentic sentiments. It is likely that others will not dismiss your feelings in the same manner as your parents did, but rather accept your genuine emotional expression.

Should further assistance be required, it is recommended that the services of a professional counselor be sought.

A counselor is a trained professional who is qualified to provide guidance and advice on a range of issues.

It is of the utmost importance to note that a counselor is better equipped to adopt a third-party perspective, maintain a non-judgmental outlook, and exhibit an objective attitude. This enables them to provide advice that is more pertinent, useful, and constructive.

It is my sincere hope that the problem you are currently experiencing can be resolved in the near future.

At this juncture, my thoughts are solely directed towards the aforementioned subject matter.

It is my sincere hope that my response has been both helpful and inspiring to the questioner. As the individual who provided the answer, I have invested a great deal of effort into studying this matter.

I extend my best wishes to you, and to all of our esteemed colleagues at Yixinli.

!

To the questioner, I just want to say, you know, that I think the present is good! I'm really grateful to have met you.

From your description, I can tell you're feeling pretty tense and anxious inside. Hugs to you!

Let's chat about this together, OK?

1. Accept and allow yourself, my dear.

In your description, you mentioned that you feel very nervous and anxious when expressing your thoughts or opinions. This can cause you to either say things without thinking or not dare to say anything at all. At that moment, you felt self-blame, frustration, depression, and shame, and had a lot of mixed feelings, didn't you?

Afterwards, you might also find yourself blaming yourself for all kinds of things and feeling like you're at fault for being like this. It's okay to feel this way, and I'm here to give you a big hug!

There's a process to allowing and accepting yourself, and you need to tell yourself that this is only temporary. Maybe you've experienced this when you first learned to express yourself, when you were not allowed to express yourself, or when you were intimidated and told to shut up, or when you had a strong inner insecurity that made you tense up all the time.

Whatever happens, it's not your fault, sweetheart. Think about it: you feel relaxed and express yourself more freely when you're with people who accept, allow, and love you. You've experienced this before, haven't you?

So, you need to accept and allow yourself, love yourself more, and remind yourself to relax more. I know you can be the person you want to be!

It's totally normal to feel stressed about expressing yourself sometimes. Even if you don't say what you want to say, the other person can still accept your sincerity and won't think anything of it.

2. Learn to relax, my friend!

I don't know what your situation is, but it can be really hard to express your thoughts or opinions when you're feeling nervous or anxious. It's totally normal to either say things without thinking or not dare to say anything at all! Are you usually nervous and anxious when expressing your thoughts or opinions with family or close friends, or is it only when you're in charge of others or in public?

Find a quiet time and space where you can relax. Think back to a time when you felt really relaxed and enjoyed yourself. Allow yourself to feel that sense of relaxation again. Take a deep breath and let the memory of your body relaxing at that time sink deep into your brain and cells. Open up your body and feel that sensation of relaxation. Remember the scene at that time and link this moment of relaxation with a body language you like. Whenever you feel nervous about expressing yourself again, take a deep breath, recall this scene, and use this specific body language to connect with the relaxed you.

3. Write down your feelings, sweetheart.

Can you feel how your body is constantly tense? This helps you to deal with sudden situations in the outside world at any time, which is great! Just feel where your body is tense at the moment, bring your breathing there, or massage the muscles in that area to relax them.

Give your body a little shake, open your arms wide, and take up as much space as you can! When you feel nervous or anxious, write down your feelings and emotions, thoughts and ideas at that moment. This writing process is a great way to see your thoughts and then check them: Are these thoughts bound to happen? Are they true?

Even if it happens, what impact will it have on you? Will there definitely be an impact? Even if there is an impact, what ways can you use to solve or reduce this impact? This is a way to gradually get in touch with your feelings and connect with your body.

It's so important to listen to your body! Every time it sends out a signal, don't ignore it. Take a moment to feel the feelings and emotions it's trying to tell you. They're all there for a reason, and you deserve to accept and embrace yourself.

You can also try writing down what you want to say first, organizing it, practicing a few times, and then expressing it. It doesn't have to be long; just a short and concise summary that expresses your meaning. And remember, you're doing great! Slowly work on expressing yourself freely.

Every day, give yourself a little pep talk. Affirm three things about yourself, record them, appreciate yourself, respond to your feelings, take care of your physical needs, and relax a little.

It's so important to remember that this experience and process will happen to everyone. We all react differently to things, and we all learn to express ourselves freely at different times. So, just practice expressing yourself and practicing inner relaxation. And if it's due to the influence of some internal imprints and major trauma, it's totally okay to seek help from a professional counselor for healing.

I really hope my answer helps you out, and I wish you all the best!

Hello.

We are afraid to express our thoughts for one of three reasons: we care a lot about other people's opinions, we don't think we are good enough, we don't have confidence, or we think other people think we are weak. We may also think the risks and consequences of speaking out are too great and that it will attract negative comments, so it will be difficult to express what we want to say.

Many people are like this in life. They are afraid to express their views and evaluations because they are afraid of conflict or because they lack self-confidence.

This situation needs to be improved.

Or we can put ourselves in the other person's shoes. If I were the other person, I would think that the problem is stupid or clever, or I would think that it is just a question. But even if it is a question, it may not attract the attention of most people. On the contrary, we will think about it based on the question.

Learn to accept negative comments. When we express our own thoughts and opinions, we must also be prepared to accept the arrival of negative comments. Negative comments are expressed because the other person is unafraid of what others may think. The comments we express do not necessarily mean that there will be conflict, but that we are expressing our own views and thoughts and seeing how others treat them.

Everyone has the ability to discern for themselves. We can look at what we have said and see which words are useful, and then express such words. We can say them tactfully, without necessarily having a certain emotion. By expressing tactfully and just stating our opinions, we can reduce our anxiety, not put too much pressure on ourselves, and do what we want without infringing on others.

Some people want feedback and opinions. Find out if the other person wants them. If they do, offer them. If they don't, say so. Be tactful, avoid causing harm or trouble, and don't cause trouble for yourself.

Believe in your ability to handle things. Our self-perception is shaped by external and internal evaluations. Don't let others' ideas dictate your perspective. You have the power to express your thoughts while respecting others and yourself. Break through your barriers and express yourself courageously. You will gain clarity on your thoughts and ideas, and you will accept yourself fully.

I am confident this will be helpful.

Hello, question asker!

Share a warm hug with someone you love!

It's totally normal to feel confused when you're trying to open up. We've all been there! It's so hard to express your thoughts and opinions when you're feeling nervous and anxious. It's like you either speak without thinking or you don't speak at all. Or you get so anxious that you just can't face your own feelings. And then there's the feeling of denying your own ideas just because they're there. It's like you're subconsciously saying, "I don't want to face this." Dear friends, is there any way to express yourself?

My dear questioner, you now hope to open yourself up, to express your views freely, and to value your own feelings. I am curious: what exactly makes you feel that your feelings are more important? I think this is the beginning of your change, and I'm here to support you every step of the way!

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the best methods and steps to take!

I think everyone will find their own way of doing things that works for them. Well, I'll share my way with you!

The first step is always acceptance. It's the first step to change. I'm an introvert, and I'm not great at expressing my feelings. But everyone is beautiful because they're different. So it's a good idea to just start accepting yourself as you are. I'm a bit introverted, and I'm not great at expressing my feelings. But is the expression you're talking about a spoken face-to-face expression? If you're better at written expression, try expressing yourself from your strengths. Write a diary or a novel. Express your thoughts and feelings.

The second step is to reduce internal friction. Have you noticed it? We all have it! It's when someone really wants to accomplish something, but in their heart they come up with all kinds of reasons to say, "Oh, you're so stupid, you can't do it, you'll never get it done." They must turn off that voice in their heart that rejects and blames themselves, and then boldly try it. Don't be afraid to fail. Failure is the mother of success. You will accumulate from failure time and time again.

The third step is to block the comments of others and yourself. We often get in our own way because we're afraid of what others will say. We might hear a voice in our hearts, a voice that may come from our parents, telling us that what we're doing is wrong and doesn't meet the standards. But the world is changing day by day, standards are set by people, and standards can be changed. Don't worry too much about what others say. Be brave and take the first step! When you are yourself, the world will become beautiful because of you!

It's true that it's often easier said than done, but you'll be amazed at how much of a difference you can make just by starting to make small changes!

I think your best bet is to plan small steps. You could try something different from usual, like you said, and work on your communication skills. Then, you could write in a diary, persevere every day, and feel your feelings. With time, you'll become more and more in control of yourself.

Okay, that's all for now, sweetheart. The world and I love you!