How to make a silent child speak during the consultation?

Dealing with a child who is reticent requires a keen insight and warm communication skills. The following methods may assist in encouraging a reticent child to speak up:

1. Instill a Sense of Security: The primary objective is to create an environment where the child feels safe and secure. Demonstrate kindness, tolerance, and patience, and refrain from exerting pressure or providing excessive guidance.

This will facilitate the child's ability to disengage their emotional defenses and become more receptive to communication.

2. Establish trust: Children may choose to remain silent for various reasons, including fear of being criticized or worried about being misunderstood. Through honest, respectful, and sincere interactions, gradually establish a trusting relationship with your child, thereby fostering a sense of trustworthiness and encouraging them to share their feelings and thoughts.

3. Utilize non-verbal communication: On occasion, children may be disinclined to engage in verbal communication, yet they may express their emotions and thoughts through non-verbal means such as body language and eye contact. It is therefore essential to observe and interpret your child's non-verbal signals with great care in order to gain a deeper understanding of their emotional state, thereby fostering a stronger connection with them.

4. Provide a Quiet Environment: Some children may be averse to communicating in a noisy environment. To facilitate their comfort, it is advisable to provide a tranquil, secluded space where they can engage in contemplation and self-expression.

5. It is recommended that open-ended questions be used in lieu of closed questions. Open-ended questions encourage deeper thinking and expression. For example, "How did you feel today?"

"In lieu of "What did you do today?

6. Share Your Own Experiences: The act of sharing one's own experiences and feelings in an appropriate manner can foster a sense of empathy in children, thereby enhancing their willingness to engage in communication. However, it is essential to ensure that the focus remains on the child's feelings rather than on the parent's own emotions.

7. Respect your child's pace: It is important to allow your child sufficient time to adjust to the new environment and situation. Attempting to rush this process may prove ineffective. Instead, it is essential to respect your child's pace and provide them with the necessary time and space to gradually open up.

8. It is recommended that parents consider seeking professional assistance if their child remains silent for an extended period of time. This may be indicative of underlying psychological or emotional issues. In such cases, it is advisable to consult with a qualified counselor or psychologist, who can provide expert guidance and support.

In general, communicating with a child who is silent requires patience, warmth, and sensitivity. By establishing trust, providing a sense of security, and utilizing appropriate communication skills, it is possible to assist the child in gradually opening up and expressing their thoughts and feelings.

Dear questioner, My name is Duo Duo Lian, and I hope my reply can be of some assistance to you.

I hope you can open your child's heart and support him, living up to the trust placed in you by parents and the class teacher. I'm sure you have many success stories where you have helped others. You're willing to ask for help, and I'm sure you can also sort things out.

It is also a positive sign that the child did not speak at all during the session. It is important to understand that children nowadays often have strong opinions and may not always listen to their parents. As a professional counselor, you have already done a commendable job. The child did not resist and participated throughout the session, which is a positive sign.

I believe your consultation has already made an impression on the child. Without expectations, after all, it's the first time you've met. It would be beneficial to try to bridge the gap between you. It's important to remember that parents and class teachers are often the most important people in a child's life. It would be helpful to know if the child feels comfortable opening up to you. What are they worried about, and what are they afraid of?

If the child doesn't say anything, it may be best to let it go. Do you agree? People tend to trust those who they feel they can confide in. Why is it easier for strangers to open up and have no inhibitions? Parents and homeroom teachers are like two big mountains. Children also have privacy. I want to comply, but I have doubts.

The child may also feel powerless and believe that he is not good enough. The individual closest to him suggests that he seek counseling. The child carries this burden, reluctant to disobey and experiencing internal conflict. It is important to reassure the child that you are not at fault and that you will take on any challenges he is facing on his behalf. It is crucial to provide your child with unwavering support and guidance.

It seems that the parents and the class teacher have tried a number of ways to help the child express his grievances, but the situation has not changed. It is possible that the child has accumulated a great deal of anger and frustration over the years. One possible approach could be to take the child into nature to help him relax and empty his mind.

It is okay to admit that you cannot do it right now. Showing weakness is also submission. Children need more companions, supporters, and listeners. This must be built on the foundation of trust. If the child is already unable to do it, let him rest. His silence means he is thinking and exploring. It is important to respect the child's true inner thoughts.

It is important to remember that each child's flowering time is different and closely related to the environment. While it may take more than one day to make a deep freeze, it is still important to respect his choice. You may also find it helpful to have a good chat with the child's parents. Parents play an important role in their child's life, and their communication model and life state can have a significant impact. The child is influenced by many factors, including the way they relate to their parents.

His state is also reflective of his relationship with his parents. You might consider gently reassuring your child that you can also be different from your parents and live the way you want to, rather than the way your parents expect. This could be seen as a form of filial piety, offering your child recognition and empowerment.

It is worth noting that children can respond quite quickly to changes in their parents. Given the trust that children place in their parents, it may be helpful to consider ways to gently guide their behavior and encourage reflection. At the same time, it is important to reassure children that they can rely on you, to connect with them emotionally, and to accept that they may not be able to do something temporarily.

I wish you the best of luck.

As a counselor, you must create a safe and comfortable environment where the student can gradually relax and be willing to share their thoughts and feelings. When a student remains silent throughout the counseling process, it is usually because they are feeling nervous, scared, distrustful, or don't know how to express their feelings. Here are some suggestions to help you deal with this situation:

Building a relationship of trust is essential. Show your students that you care and are on their side by speaking to them in a friendly tone, smiling, and making eye contact.

At the same time, respect the student's privacy and personal space. Do not force them to share information.

Listen and observe. You can understand a student's emotions and needs even if they don't speak. Pay attention to their facial expressions, body language, and voice changes. These can provide clues.

Use open-ended questions to guide students to express their thoughts and feelings. For example, ask them how they have been feeling lately.

Asking students directly if there's anything bothering them can encourage them to open up.

Nonverbal communication: Nonverbal communication is often more effective than verbal communication. Show your understanding and support by nodding, smiling encouragingly, and using appropriate physical contact (such as patting someone on the shoulder).

Introduce activities or games. For younger students, some light activities or games are an excellent way to break the ice, help them relax, and encourage them to share.

After the consultation, communicate with parents and class teachers to gain insight into the student's situation at home and school. This will help you understand the student's background and needs. Additionally, convey the student's performance during the consultation process to request their support and cooperation.

Be patient. Students may need time to adapt to new environments and people. As a counselor, you must be patient and allow the process to unfold at its own pace.

Give students enough time to gradually open up.

Remember, each student is unique. It is essential to try different approaches to find the one that works best for them. Patience, understanding, and respect are key.

Dear host, I'm really grateful to be able to talk about this with you.

This question from the original poster is something I often come across in my clinical work. I hope that sharing my experience can provide some ideas and inspiration.

First, when a child comes to the counseling room for help, it's important to understand why they're there, to get them to open up and to choose the right way to communicate.

Let's say a child comes to us looking for help on their own. They'll probably be pretty proactive, even if they're not totally happy about it. But if there's pressure from home and school, they'll probably be reluctant and not really open. So, we need to deal with their resistance first, rather than asking them to tell us what they want.

Second, when a child is silent, it's important to observe and communicate in small ways through non-verbal cues, while maintaining a consistent level of empathy.

I met a student visitor (in their first year) who, on top of having to come to the school, had also tried to kill themselves a few times. This had made them lose trust in seeking help and also lose hope in themselves. Once I understood this, I decided to do some "micro-observation" and "micro-communication."

For instance, take note of the visitor's attire and accessories, as well as their personal style, to get a general idea of what they're about.

Of course, the key here is that the counselor needs to prepare some age-appropriate topics in advance, which can help encourage visitors to open up.

Third, when family members are with the client, it's often best to first build a rapport with them and understand what's going on for the client before doing any face-to-face counseling.

In many cases, we tend to overlook some resources in family system counseling, like the visiting family members. This is actually a crucial step in the whole process.

If the client has a close relationship with their family and their family's visit shows how much they value the client, it's often possible to find clues or breakthroughs in communication with the client's family members.

If the client is estranged from their family (or even hostile), the opposite approach is often best. Complaints from family members (or judgments about the client) are often the things the client resists. Backtracking along this clue makes it easy to find the pain points in the client.

At the same time, show you care and be warm, and share a little about yourself. These three things will help the client open up.

I hope you find this personal experience I shared helpful. I wish you all the best!

I hope my answer helps you.

Let the child be silent. This is an act of acceptance. When the child realizes that you are different from his parents and the homeroom teacher, that you understand him and support him, the silence will be broken.

I advise you to:

In counseling, a good relationship is the foundation. It is important to be able to allow the child to be silent, as this is an expression of respect and acceptance for him. You can also convey your care and understanding for him in some way. When the child can feel your respect, understanding, and acceptance, he will slowly open his heart.

If a child comes for counseling and is reluctant to express himself, it's likely because he didn't come of his own accord but was forced to. This means he may be carrying a lot of emotions within himself. If his parents and homeroom teacher don't understand him and even make him feel like they're in opposition, he may feel that you are the same as them and that you will treat him in the same way. This could make him feel that talking won't be helpful.

It is essential to convey your care and understanding for him in some way. When the child can feel your respect, understanding, and acceptance, he will slowly open up, which is establishing a good relationship. For example, when the child comes in, you can smile and say to him, "How was your day?"

If he is tired from learning, you must immediately pour him a cup of warm water, let him sit and rest for a while, and allow him to be silent. At the same time, you must express your care and understanding for him verbally, and also give him care and support through non-verbal means, such as smiling, patting his shoulder, and patting his head. You must also affirm the principle of confidentiality, create a safe space for him, and let him express himself with peace of mind.

2. Use non-verbal psychological techniques to understand your child's state of mind and establish a connection.

We can also use non-verbal psychological techniques to help children communicate with us in a relaxed state. For example, let the child play with the sand tray. Just observe while he plays. He will think he is just playing a game, while you can get some information. You can also establish a connection with the child by talking about the sand tray. You can also let the child draw, for example, let him draw a tree or a house-tree-person, so as to understand the child's emotional state and personality state. If the child likes to draw, you can quickly establish a connection.

We can also approach the subject from a different angle. Instead of talking to your child about serious topics, start with simple conversations. Ask about their favorite game, what they like to eat, or if they had any fun today.

In these simple conversations, you can gain your child's trust and lay a good foundation for a relationship by making him feel your non-judgmental and respectful attitude.

Make your child feel safe, relaxed, warm, and accepted with you. Show him that you can give him support and help. Then, he will change.

This is for your reference. Best wishes!

Dear Sir/Madam, I am pleased to have this opportunity to respond to your questions. I hope that you will find my suggestions helpful.

It is worth noting that child counseling presents unique challenges. Children often lack the same level of verbal communication and autonomy as adults. To effectively assist them, it is essential to adopt an external perspective and provide guidance that is both appropriate and reasonable, enabling them to express themselves.

It is advisable to first establish a rapport with the class teacher and parents before consulting with the child. This will enable us to gain insight into the specific issues that have prompted the teacher and parents to seek guidance. At the very least, this will provide us with a starting point for understanding the child's behaviour and performance.

In the process of understanding with teachers and parents, we do not necessarily accept their interpretations as accurate. Children often present a different side of themselves to teachers and parents, and there are many reasons behind this. If we accept the problems as presented by the teacher and parents and directly express them to the child, it may further erode the child's trust in us.

Therefore, we only use outside information as a reference. It is also our policy to establish trust with the child in the early stages. Since we have no idea about the child's relationship with the parents or the teacher, we do not arbitrarily use the parents or the teacher as an entry point, but rather let the child get to know each other.

In the event that verbal or written methods are ineffective in understanding the child, we may utilize sandplay or drawing as a supplementary approach to gain insight and analysis.

We hope that through various methods, you will be able to identify an effective way to consult with your child, build a trusting relationship with them, and encourage them to open up.

We would like to extend our warmest regards to you and your family.