How to overcome communication barriers with superiors and public speaking anxiety and tension?

Hello, question asker. I can see that you're feeling a bit confused, and I want you to know that I'm here to support you.

I believe what you are experiencing now may be some professional problems. Please accept my warmest regards.

I wonder if the questioner might be affected by the "halo effect" in psychology.

It's possible that you're thinking of your superior as an authority figure from your school days, perhaps like a teacher.

It might also be the case that you had a less than ideal experience when you gave a speech in front of someone in a position of authority in the past.

It is understandable that when you have to give a speech in front of your superior or leader, you may feel particularly anxious and nervous.

I would like to suggest a few possible courses of action.

If you have had a challenging experience when giving a public speech in front of your leader in the past, you might consider seeking professional psychological counseling to address this issue.

Perhaps next time, you could try treating your superior as an ordinary person, someone you know, rather than as an authority figure.

If you feel particularly nervous or anxious, it might help to practise more at home. You could try using stuffed animals or dolls as the audience that will listen to your speech at work.

If I may make a suggestion, next time you have to give a speech in front of your superiors, you might also consider using him as a stuffed animal or doll in your home to relieve your anxiety.

In my own experience of studying and working abroad, I found that the above method helped me to overcome my own speech anxiety. I believe it has been tested and is effective.

I would like to suggest that you might like to try the methods I mentioned above.

I truly hope that the issue you're facing can be resolved as soon as possible.

At this moment, I can only think of these things.

I hope my answer above will be helpful and inspiring to you. I am here to offer my assistance in any way I can.

Here at Yixinli, we extend our warmest regards to you and wish you the best.

Hello, question asker! I'm happy to discuss your anxiety with you further if you'd like.

It seems that you are seeking ways to provide yourself with some comfort. Due to communication challenges with your leader, you experience anxiety when giving presentations and find it very challenging. Learning to communicate effectively is a valuable skill in the workplace.

From the questioner's description, it seems that the source of the questioner's anxiety may be that he cares a great deal about what his leader thinks of him and is always trying to show his best side to his leader. If he cannot show his best side, he may become anxious. Could I ask the questioner if he has ever noticed the deeper source of this anxiety?

From what I can gather from the description, it seems that the questioner's anxiety may be rooted in a sense of self-pressure. Could it be that the questioner is concerned that if he makes a mistake or doesn't perform well, it might lead to feelings of anxiety? It would be helpful to understand the underlying reasons for these anxious feelings.

It might be helpful to consider whether the original poster was brought up in a family that teaches that if you don't get things done, you're not good enough, and whether the original poster is caught up in worrying about their own inadequacy.

If I might make a suggestion, I believe that when faced with anxiety, it can be helpful to learn to let it go. Otherwise, dwelling on it may not be beneficial. What are your thoughts on this? I believe that it is important to face the pressure in the workplace and communication with your leader. Perhaps taking a moment to pause and reflect on what you want and the motivation behind wanting to do well could be helpful.

It would be helpful to understand what the questioner is hoping for and what they are afraid of.

It might be helpful for the questioner to take a break and relax, as this could help them find their own answer.

Due to platform restrictions, we are unable to discuss the questioner's question in detail. However, I can provide some suggestions to address the questioner's anxiety.

Anxiety can be defined as a negative imagination of something that has not yet happened. If we want to relieve our anxiety, it may be helpful to start here.

It might be helpful to try to feel more in control of things that haven't happened yet, or to adjust your imagination and replace negative thoughts with positive ones.

Take a moment to jot down the potential challenges you might face.

If the questioner is feeling particularly anxious about a public speech, it might be helpful to write down all the negative thoughts that are coming up for them. Once you have written them down and made them explicit, you might find that you can look at your own affairs from an independent third-party perspective. This can help you to let go of some of your concerns.

At this point, you may find that the worst-case scenario is not as concerning as you initially thought. The questioner can even try to imagine what they would like to hear and learn in this speech if they were the leader, and what they would be more concerned about in the leader's position.

It might be helpful to write down the things that concern them and include them in a speech to be delivered to the leader. Could this help to relieve the questioner's anxiety?

If I may enquire, what are you currently feeling anxious about? You are welcome to write them all down. Could you please describe what you perceive to be the worst possible outcome if these things are not done properly? And what would you consider to be an unacceptable consequence for yourself?

If such a situation were to arise, would you be able to accept it?

Please take a moment to list the problems that are on your mind.

Please take a moment to list the problems that are on your mind. Be as honest with yourself as possible, and list the three problems that are most pressing at the moment. For each problem, please write down three potential solutions. If you'd like, you can even focus on the problem you're most eager to solve at the moment. You can ask someone to encourage you or seek help from others to find a solution.

Which of these issues is the questioner most eager to address? Is it communication with the leader, anxiety about public speaking, or worries? It may be helpful to focus on solving one issue at a time.

As an alternative, the questioner may wish to consider addressing the issue in accordance with the coping plan they have devised. Once the problem has been resolved, it would be interesting to observe whether the anxiety has abated.

It may be helpful to learn to express your anxiety and accept yourself.

It would be beneficial to have a correct understanding of anxiety when facing it. It can be seen as a kind of instinctive defense mechanism of the human body. When people encounter certain dangerous situations, they may find themselves stimulating their own anxiety.

It may be helpful to recognize that feeling anxious is not necessarily wrong. Learning to express these feelings in a healthy way can be beneficial. The questioner might consider engaging in an enjoyable activity during their free time to distract themselves and redirect their focus towards more constructive outlets for expressing their emotions.

If you are experiencing anxiety, you may benefit from accepting yourself. For instance, if you enjoy purchasing electronic equipment, you could consider treating yourself to a new item at the end of the year as a reward for your efforts throughout the year. Alternatively, you could go out to a restaurant that you have always wanted to try and enjoy a special meal. In short, it is important to learn how to make yourself happy.

Everyone should have their own interests and hobbies, but it might be helpful to consider that if you are a person of mental labor, your interests could perhaps be the opposite of your mental labor; conversely, if you are a manual laborer, your interests and hobbies could be the opposite of your manual labor. The mind and body are unified in the human being. It might be beneficial to remember that you cannot get used to manual labor without using your brain, and you cannot use your brain without using your body. It could be valuable to strive for a balance between mental and physical strength.

It might be helpful to find a professional counselor to make adjustments. If the questioner finds the above methods challenging to do on their own, or if they feel they need to dig deeper into the root cause of their subconscious anxiety, they could also consider going to the platform to find some counselors for counseling. It may be beneficial to let the counselor make a detailed adjustment plan based on the situation of the questioner.

I hope my answer is helpful to the questioner!

Communication and public speaking are skills that can be developed from an early age. Effective communication and public speaking are not innate abilities; they can be learned. If you feel that you have communication barriers, it may not just be a fear of authority.

Another possibility is that you lack confidence in public speaking. Due to your internal lack of confidence, you are more likely to become anxious and nervous. You are already experiencing severe anxiety, so it is advisable to at least discuss it with someone and make adjustments.

Since childhood, we have had the opportunity to develop these abilities, present ourselves to our elders, and obtain resources and praise. Even if there are flaws, they can be corrected in time.

You are reluctant to communicate with your boss to gain clarity on your goals. You may be concerned that you have shortcomings, but it is unavoidable to have flaws. Worrying about making mistakes may hinder your ability to perform. You have already identified some experiences and are seeking to learn how to proactively manage and adapt your mindset.

By leveraging positive and healthy experiences, we can recognize that our creativity and business acumen were previously valued and affirmed. This serves as an affirmation of your work. As a professional heart exploration coach, I recommend that you take a psychological test of your career needs to gain a better understanding of your play and work experience.

Please advise.

Hello.

You are shy and often ask your supervisor for help. You worry that your supervisor will think you are not professional enough to do your work independently. This makes it hard for you to do your work and you spend a lot of time thinking about what you should do. This affects your work efficiency and the time you have to rest.

It's important to communicate with your leader about your work. This helps them understand your abilities and expectations. It also helps you understand their requirements and do your work better.

So, should you communicate the facts properly? It won't cause trouble or impact you, and it will make you look professional.

Will my leader dislike me? You can work better and more efficiently with your leader.

Your leader's recognition and affirmation of your competence is important for your future promotion and salary increase.

This communication and coordination work requires a lot of effort. For example, we have to report on our work, explain our actions, deal with obstacles, and give our outlook.

Ask your leader for their opinion sometimes. Give your leader the right to choose, make decisions, and delegate authority. Ask your leader about their requirements and expectations.

Your leader's affirmation and praise is also the result of your hard work. You were flustered preparing for work the day before. You were anxious and nervous from staying up late working overtime.

We kept our internal and work-related responsibilities the same. The leader now has a better understanding of our work. The leader also has more control over the work process. We still have control, and we've communicated and given feedback well.

If you read the whole description, you can see that there is no problem with your work ability. You are fully competent, but you lack a part of your internal construction. You are easily affected by distress and influence, and you are consumed by your work.

Communication at work is important. If you can communicate well, you can make good decisions. This will help you succeed in your career.

Good day. My name is Yiyashu, and I am pleased to offer my assistance in navigating this challenge.

From your written work, it is evident that you are a highly organized individual who is proactive in learning and self-improvement. Following the encounter with the fear of authority, you have demonstrated remarkable initiative in adopting various strategies to overcome and manage the situation, which is a noteworthy personal attribute. I commend you for this.

The issue currently being experienced is, in fact, a fear of authority. This fear and anxiety reflect the relationship pattern that has been established with one's parents since childhood.

Parents represent the initial authority figures encountered in life. If the myriad of causes and effects in the relationship with one's parents since childhood have not been resolved and processed, the relationship with one's leaders in the workplace will reflect this in adulthood. The majority of individuals I have encountered who exhibit an authority complex have unresolved relationship issues with their parents from an early age.

Therefore, we can assist in the deconstruction of your fear of authority and facilitate a more comprehensive understanding.

Individuals with an authority complex tend to exhibit heightened concern regarding the evaluation and attitude of authority figures towards them.

This is due to a lack of recognition from parents and other caregivers during early childhood, as well as a lack of encouragement and recognition from important figures such as elders.

Therefore, upon reaching adulthood, individuals may find themselves still situated within a developmental stage wherein they exhibit a persistent need for external validation from a figure who is perceived as more powerful and capable than themselves.

It is important to note that everyone still requires affirmation from others after reaching adulthood. However, if one becomes overly invested in this need, it may indicate a need for personal growth and healing.

Upon completion of the aforementioned account, the reader may gain a more nuanced understanding of their current circumstances. It is possible that they may also recognize that the present issue is not solely a consequence of the immediate situation, but rather a product of past childhood trauma and the relationship with one's parents during that period. Once this realization is attained, the path to healing and action can be embarked upon in two distinct directions.

It is recommended that the individual begin by reflecting on their past experiences, including their relationship with their parents, the perceptions they learned from them, and the emotions they experienced within their original family. This reflection should be conducted under the guidance of a counselor, with the aim of sorting through past events, identifying past sticking points and emotional issues, and supporting the individual in addressing childhood trauma.

From the current level of understanding, two areas require further study and reflection:

1. At the cognitive level, it is essential to recognize that an authoritative figure is also a human being, not merely a symbol of power or authority. Many individuals who are fearful of authority tend to view it as a mere representation of power and strength, failing to acknowledge that, beyond their social role, an authority figure is also a flesh-and-blood human being with emotions and limitations.

When this reality is not acknowledged, individuals tend to project fantasies or fears onto authority figures. However, these projections are merely manifestations of one's own internal experiences and do not necessarily reflect the objective truth.

The reality is that we are all similar to those in authority. We are ordinary and average individuals with distinct social roles and responsibilities.

I posit that recognizing this is of great importance to a significant proportion of the population.

2. Behavioral Level

At the behavioral level, it is evident that you have been engaged in practice and action, resulting in favorable outcomes. Therefore, an in-depth examination of this matter is unnecessary. Your performance is commendable, and your extensive practice has provided you with invaluable experiences.

However, it is also important to note that the new behavior is not solely about self-improvement and meeting the expectations of the leader. It is also about learning to accept oneself, even in the face of dissatisfaction from the leader. This is a crucial aspect that the questioner should prioritize. In addition to developing effective communication and reporting skills, it is essential to cultivate the ability to accept one's own abilities, even when the leader is not satisfied. This requires a shift in mindset and a deeper understanding of self-acceptance.

3. Emotional level

The emotional level is the aspect that requires the greatest attention, as the individual in question displays a tendency to prioritize rational thinking and strong initiative over emotional awareness and self-expression. This discrepancy merits attention and awareness. A counselor could facilitate this process by guiding the individual through introspective observation.

Integrating the aforementioned three levels should prove beneficial in resolving the issue at hand. It is my hope that this approach will prove fruitful.

Hello!

First of all, I have to give you a big thumbs-up! You're very aware of this problem with yourself, you've thought deeply about it, and you have a good approach to change.

It's also worth looking at what might have caused your problems. Think back to your own growth process, especially your early years. Were you constantly criticized, rejected, or suppressed by your parents or teachers? Did you become very fearful in the face of authority, always afraid of doing badly, and overly concerned about other people's opinions?

This exploration is meant to help you understand your own character traits better, accept yourself more, and find a way to make changes.

If you're having trouble adjusting and recognizing this part on your own, you can seek professional help from a counselor if you'd like. A counselor will provide a safe space for you to accept and tolerate your feelings, allowing you to revisit the initial traumatic experience in a controlled environment. This approach could be beneficial for you.

We just wanted to remind you that our personalities and character traits are formed over a long period of time, especially in early childhood. During this time, strategies developed for survival become fixed without our awareness or ability to protect ourselves. Therefore, changing is never a matter of one day. It requires long-term commitment. As long as you have a deep understanding and the right approach, you will definitely be able to improve. You should also have the confidence to change yourself.

Also, it's not really possible to change someone's personality completely, so we shouldn't have unrealistic expectations of ourselves. If we don't accept ourselves, we'll probably have problems. So, we should focus on the things we can change and accept the things we can't.

You may find it helpful to refer back to this information.

I hope Hongyu's reply helps you out. Thanks for asking!

Hello, question asker!

I can see that you're facing some challenges. You mentioned that you don't get along with your superior and are worried about communicating with him about work. You're concerned that he might not see you as professional enough to handle things independently. You're also feeling pretty nervous and anxious about public speaking.

They get where you're coming from and know you're a perfectionist who's really in tune with yourself. You've come up with some great solutions for your own issues, which is awesome!

I'll give you a quick summary of what I've gathered:

1. It's totally normal to feel confused when you're trying to figure out how to do your best at work. You want to be as professional as you can be, but you're worried that you're not quite there yet and that it'll slow you down. Work ability and experience take time to develop. The more you work, the better you'll get at your job. Don't worry too much.

2. All nervousness, fear, and anxiety come from your own lack of confidence. You tend to doubt yourself and worry about doing things wrong. You're also worried about giving the leader a bad impression. This leads to all kinds of self-doubt. To truly overcome these psychological barriers, you have to address the root problem. Work on your skills, boost your confidence, communicate more with your leader, and be more eloquent. Don't worry, it's not too late.

3. The methods you've outlined are still pretty spot on. Generally speaking, they're:

How can I get over my nerves when I have to give a speech?

The most important thing is to be confident.

Treat public speaking like any other task. Believe that you can do it well, and your fear will be much better. Don't put too much psychological pressure on yourself.

1) Put together a speech in advance and have a rough idea of what you're going to say.

If you're giving a speech, prepare it in advance and just speak in the order you've written it. If you're giving an impromptu speech, quickly prepare it in your mind before going on stage and then adapt to the situation on the spot. If you can't remember it, just read from the script.

3) Take a deep breath and try to relax.

Take your time when you're getting ready to speak. This will help you stay calm.

4) Breathe deeply.

Take a deep breath and slowly exhale, which will help calm your heartbeat. You can also take a sip of water from your glass to help you relax.

5) Take a moment to look around at the audience.

Take a look around you, be bold and confident. There's no need to look away. If you meet someone you know, you can smile. Don't be afraid to look at other people. This will help you to improve your ability to improvise.

6) Get the mood going before you start.

You can throw in a joke or two, or tease the audience a bit, which will also show off your sense of humor. Some appropriate and well-placed banter will liven up the atmosphere and help you feel less nervous on stage.

7) Speak slowly during the speech.

Once you start speaking, you need to control your speech rate. Don't speak too quickly. If you do, the audience won't be able to follow, and you'll just make yourself more nervous. Speaking more slowly will give your brain enough time to think, so you won't forget what you want to say and find yourself in an embarrassing situation.

8) It'd be a good idea to read more and practice more in your daily life.

If you have a wide range of knowledge and a wealth of accumulated knowledge, you'll be able to speak with confidence and eloquence naturally. Coupled with your usual diligent practice and repeated practice, your public speaking skills will also improve.

"One minute on stage requires ten years of hard work off stage." The more you practice, the better you'll get at public speaking.

I hope this helps. Best, [Name]

Hello? Questioner, you seem lost. Let me hug you!

1.

People need to solve two problems:

Know yourself.

Relationships with others affect relationships with oneself.

2.

Interpersonal communication is difficult, but we always want to communicate with others. Read the book "The Art of Communication" when you have time, or just listen to it!

3.

Avoid anxiety. First, write your speech. Then, prepare well. When you're ready, you'll be more relaxed. You've also said you've been praised. You're not as bad as you think!

Wearing contact lenses is like learning to ride a bike. The first time is hard, but the second time is easier. You'll get used to it until you're good at it. The same is true of public speaking. Practice makes perfect!

4.

Maybe you've never given a speech. Maybe you had a bad experience with others when you were young. Now, when you're in similar situations, you get anxious. Maybe you worry too much about what others think. Or maybe you didn't get enough attention when you were younger.

5.

Maybe you've never given a speech. Maybe you had a bad experience with others when you were young. Now, when you're in similar situations, you get anxious. Maybe you worry too much about what others think. Or maybe you didn't get enough attention when you were younger.

5.

Cognition:

Think about how early traumatic experiences have affected you.

I always fail. I can't speak well.

I can't stay calm! I'm shaking with fear!

Everyone must be laughing at me!

② Find the cause of your anxiety.

What am I really afraid of?

(2) What do I want? Is it admiration, praise, or to convey content?

(3) Do I want to succeed as much as I can?

③ Positive self-intervention

For example: Is the problem going to happen?

(2) Think about the worst that could happen. Could you accept it?

6.

Be more confident.

Think about your best qualities.

Turn negatives into positives.

Say "I can do it, I'm great!" when you make progress.

7.

Practice smiling.

a. Read "eggplant" and "tianqi" several times.

b. Put your fingers at the corners of your mouth and lift them up. This helps relieve anxiety and makes speech more natural. It also boosts self-confidence.

I hope this helps!