I have a lot of thoughts inside, but no motivation in reality. I want to do something, but I don't. Why?

Hello, landlord. I can relate to the way you're feeling from reading your description. We all have a lot of ideas, but it's tough to make them happen. It's like painting a big pie, but by the time you're done, it's so big that you can't accept it yourself. I hope my sharing can help you...

Let's start by asking ourselves a question:

What are you really after?

Once we know what we want to achieve, we need to think about how we're going to do it.

As you mentioned in the article, there are lots of great ideas, but it's tough to put them into practice. This is because there are so many goals to achieve, and it's not always clear where to start.

It's a bit like at work. Every day we get caught up in a lot of small tasks that seem important, but at the end of the day, we often feel like we haven't achieved much. Why is this? We've spent a lot of time on it, but the end result isn't great.

This is a lack of concept of time, for sure. If you make a list of your goals and set a deadline for each one, then work towards achieving them one by one.

If we want to truly become masters of our time, we should learn to allocate our time reasonably. How much time you spend on a goal determines whether you achieve it. So, it's important to learn how to manage your time effectively.

We can group our goals into four categories using the four-quadrant time management method:

Fixed-point goals can be split into four groups: important and urgent, important but not urgent, urgent but not important, and not important and not urgent.

We should focus our energy on important and urgent tasks, then tackle trivial or mechanically repetitive tasks later. We should also selectively give up some things that aren't as important for now, so we can spend time on important tasks and achieve our goals at a steady pace.

You can also set yourself this goal:

If you could only do five things a day, what would they be?

We can also think more about this and plan our lives.

What kind of person do you want to become? What kind of life do you want to live?

What are the top five things you want to achieve in your life?

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to this question.

However, when we can distinguish ourselves and know what we should be working on, we can make sure we're spending our time on the right things.

This way, you'll achieve your goals one step at a time.

I hope these thoughts help you.

Hello, host.

I'm here to help and I'd love to get your feedback. Let me fly.

The host said he has a lot of ideas but no motivation to do them. I'm not sure why. Maybe he's anxious or self-critical.

It's fair to say that there are quite a few people who think this way. We know smoking is bad and drinking is bad, but look around and you'll see that there are quite a few people like this. They understand the reasoning, but just can't do it. That's why someone once said, "I've read many books and understood many truths, but I can't say I've lived a good life."

This shows that there's a big gap between what we know and what we do. It's tough to integrate knowledge and action. As the Book of History says, "It is not difficult to know, but difficult to do."

In the book Amazing Me by Chen Hai-xian, it's said that there's an emotional side and a rational side to our inner selves, just like the elephant and the elephant rider. We often want to change our rational side, hoping that after we change, there will be good or bad results to look forward to.

It's like having a healthy body after losing weight. But we haven't reached that point yet, so we only have the idea of what it would be like, but we haven't experienced it yet.

Our emotional side is different, though, and comes from our existing experiences. Logically, we want to lose weight, but we're used to a comfortable bed and tasty food.

This means that change is tough.

Some psychologists have also looked at this from a different angle, using family systems theory as an example. This suggests that we all play a part in a system, which is the norm within that system.

If you want to make a change, you might have to change the whole system. The system itself requires homeostasis. This is why, if you say you want to lose weight, friends will say that you need to eat until you are full in order to have the strength to succeed.

This is all about system theory.

I read some books recently and got the impression that change is difficult. Maybe it's because I haven't found the right path or strategy between knowing and doing. From a modern perspective, a strategy like "moving mountains" is obviously wrong.

Similarly, sometimes we want to find a girlfriend but don't know how to go about it or how to talk to her. It's also possible. We often say that he really wants to learn, but he just doesn't know how.

Well, change is tough because if it's too big, we'll wonder if it's really us. So, the change should be small. Mr. Li Songwei suggests a strategy called "5% change," which means that when we make changes, we only need to change 5%.

I hope this is inspiring for the host, and I look forward to hearing their thoughts, attention, and feedback.

The questioner is very real and very cute. This is actually a problem that many people have.

You have lots of ideas—all of them good. But you also know that you don't seem to have much motivation.

As you can see from the above content, our thoughts and wishes can be fulfilled instantly, but our actions need to be implemented in our daily lives and sustained continuously. The results may only be seen after a period of time.

This is what we often call having high ideals and a thin grasp on reality.

There are many reasons for this, including deep-seated systemic conditions, factors related to one's own ability to execute, and one's own protective mechanisms.

Let's say I want to lose weight.

For instance, if your family is all obese, you're more likely to agree with the system and think that you're unlikely to be thin. This is just one way of looking at it, but it's also a systematic, belonging, genetic factor.

For instance, you've set yourself a goal of doing 30 minutes of aerobic exercise and 30 minutes of anaerobic exercise every day. However, you only managed to stick to it for two days and then stopped, which isn't the best approach.

For instance, you might think that losing weight will make you more attractive. But deep down, you might be afraid of being noticed by others and uncomfortable with that attention. In that case, you might consciously allow yourself to fail at your weight loss plan.

This is just a way to protect yourself.

This is a good example of the same principle. You want to be good at this.

It's also important to understand some of the main reasons why we don't take action.

First, we humans tend to avoid change because it often means losing the familiar.

We're afraid of the unknown, of change, of meeting the new and the unfamiliar. We know the status quo isn't always great, but the unknown and the unfamiliar can be scary. They can be our way of protecting ourselves, or they can be our natural patterns or our internal defense mechanisms. Either way, they can keep us stuck.

Second, I'm hoping to make some positive changes, but I often lack patience and the goals I set may not be clear, unimplementable, or quantifiable.

For instance, I decided to learn a foreign language well. After a month of studying, I realized I hadn't made much progress. What resources did I use to learn this month?

Watching American dramas is a good example of unclear goals, inadequate implementation, and a lack of quantifiable standards for evaluation.

Third, we can get thrown off by external events, which can make it hard to distinguish between consumptive entertainment and developmental entertainment.

For example, I know my idea is a good one and I want to learn English well. I know how great it is to be able to communicate with the world, to understand movies in the original language, and to read more books from other countries.

But my idea didn't come to fruition right away. I was in a rather uninspiring and unoriginal situation.

I spent some time on Douyin and it made me feel really happy.

Before I knew it, my allotted time had run out.

These are common things in our lives, and they are also common phenomena. It's not easy to change, but it's not impossible. Those who succeed are heroes and brave people.

If you want to understand yourself better, you might want to find a counselor and let them work with you for a while. You can also come to me if you like.