I wanted to send this passage to a friend-like relative, and I hesitated for several nights.

Hello! I'm Qu Huidong, a psychological counselor who loves to speak in images.

The questioner said that he had been eagerly awaiting the chance to send this message to his "dear cousin," who is a friend-like relative, for several nights without knowing why he wanted to send it.

Let me help you overcome your hesitation!

I'm sure you've already thought about how your cousin will react after you send this message, but I just wanted to check in with you to make sure you've thought about it.

Oh, I know! Is he confused or worried about you? And are you worried that he will worry about you?

Are you afraid that he will worry about you? Or that he will criticize you?

Or are you afraid that he will tell the elders what he saw, making everyone worry about you?

I'm excited to hear more about your relationship with this friend-like cousin! Do you talk about everything?

There are so many kinds of friends! We have critical friends, close friends, and even bad friends. Which kind is he? And if you were to replace him with another friend, would you hesitate?

Now, let's dive into the message you've been waiting to send to your cousin!

If I were your cousin, I would be excited to help! I can't tell from your status whether you're in a difficult situation, but I'm ready to jump in and help in any way I can.

But you said you would pay me back, which made me feel a little more at ease. It's not because you said you could pay me back, but because you let me know that for the time being you are still safe and you still have things to worry about. I would rather let you keep owing me money, so that you can have a reason to hang in there. But I still hope you can tell me what really happened. I really want to be able to help you!

I just now tried to reply to your message in my cousin's tone of voice. I don't know how you feel at the moment, but I'm excited to see how things go from here! I wonder if you can express your inner demands to your cousin more clearly now.

I really hope you can communicate well, and even more importantly, communicate well with yourself!

Wishing you the best!

Hello, I'm Strawberry.

From the text, the questioner sent this passage to his cousin, and the use of the word "dear" shows that the questioner and his cousin have a relatively deep relationship. You overthink whether your actions will cause trouble or affect others because you care.

It's a two-way street. The questioner values the bond with his cousin and is confident that his cousin feels the same. He'll do what he wants and explain the situation afterwards.

The hesitation behind it

You care about and value him, so you're concerned that your situation might affect your cousin's emotions. You said you always feel like you're not doing a good job. Is the questioner sick? You're afraid that your cousin will worry about you when he knows you're not feeling well.

When people are sick, they are more vulnerable and their outlook on life may be affected, becoming more negative. When we are sick, our state of mind is actually very important. We must face it positively and optimistically to ensure our body recovers more quickly.

The fact that you owe money is also a source of concern for the question asker. He is worried that if he doesn't pay his cousin back, his cousin will think badly of him. However, under normal circumstances, the question asker would not want to owe his cousin money. He wants his cousin to understand the reason why he is not paying back the money, rather than him being dishonest. This is also the reason why the question asker is hesitant.

Don't be anxious.

A few short words can show the trust the questioner's cousin has in the questioner. In these past few years, it hasn't been easy for anyone. No matter what the situation is, the questioner's cousin is willing to lend the questioner money, so the questioner should trust him even more. When you are willing to explain your situation to your cousin clearly, he can understand you.

Overwhelming anxiety prevents people from calmly sorting out their problems. The question asker should meditate to calm down before thinking back over their problems. Are these problems causing you too much stress, making it unbearable, and causing you to think badly about yourself?

People must form the habit of confiding in others. Otherwise, many things will become the cause of our collapse. Emotions will not disappear on their own. The more they are suppressed, the more difficult it will be for us. When emotions arise, we can express them and let them out in more reasonable ways.

Many people grit their teeth and forge ahead. Others see only our strong side, but they ignore our vulnerabilities and emotions. Believe in yourself. We understand ourselves, see ourselves, and care for ourselves.

Problems are not problems. They are how we perceive them. Look at problems from a different perspective and you will find that you can solve many things.

I am confident that my answer will be helpful to the questioner. Best of luck!