I was really sad when my friend didn't come over to my side after hearing what the person at the previous table had said.

It is important to note that friendships between classmates are not always as pure as one might assume.

In stating that you accompanied your friend to wait for her mother, it is evident that at that time you desired to remain in her company for a longer period. This indicates that you have accepted this friend into your inner circle.

The discord between you and her is a direct result of your former classmate's actions.

The precise nature of the conflict that precipitated her subsequent hostile attitude towards you is unclear.

The issue is not particularly significant, but it is evident that emotional confusion is a contributing factor.

Let us begin by discussing your former classmate. It is my assessment that she exhibits certain character flaws, and you are keenly aware of them.

Given your inability to accept her behavior, it is imperative that you gradually distance yourself from her.

It is important to note that befriending someone with whom one does not share the same values can often result in a significant amount of unnecessary conflict and turmoil.

Furthermore, you have effectively distanced yourself from her.

It is therefore reasonable to conclude that if you are a friend who is more agreeable, you are not someone who is similar to her either.

Therefore, even if your former classmate recounts more anecdotes about your actions, she will not be inclined to accept them as truth.

It is also possible, however, that one has been "bewitched." Nevertheless, the truth will eventually emerge.

It would be advisable to maintain the current approach of observing the situation from a distance, as there is no need to become involved in a matter that is evidently between the two individuals in question.

It is inevitable that we will only attract people who are similar to ourselves. You also stated that your friend is more talkative. It is therefore possible that you and she, or she and you, are not particularly attracted to each other.

In conclusion, the issue at hand is not a personal one; rather, it is a matter of simply being true to oneself.

Furthermore, your current attitude is that you are unable to demonstrate your interest in their activities. If they are in agreement and you express your concern, it will merely become a trivial topic of discussion between them.

However, this does not imply that one should suppress one's emotions. The loss of a friend who is indifferent to one's feelings is a significant setback. It is crucial to understand the futility of dwelling on negative emotions.

It would be prudent to consider the potential benefits of forming new friendships.

The formation of friendships is contingent upon a greater frequency of conversation and a lesser frequency of conflict. It is evident that the two individuals in question derive happiness from their interactions when they are in alignment. This is an exemplar of a "right friendship."

Furthermore, I have another question. You enter the study room to study by yourself, preoccupied with the concerns of others, thereby wasting your time.

It is advisable to invest more time and effort into personal development and self-improvement.

Should the friend in question choose to initiate contact, a smile is an appropriate greeting. In the event that such contact is not made, it is advisable to focus on one's studies and self-study.

One should not experience sadness when one's own future is compromised for the sake of a friend one does not know.

Hello, I hope this message finds you well. I just wanted to introduce myself. I'm a smiling pumpkin.

Perhaps you could reply to the original poster and say

1. It seems that my former classmate is now spending time with my current best friend, and I've overheard them whispering and talking about me.

2. My former classmate is quite inquisitive and enjoys a bit of mischief.

3. You are disappointed that your friend did not come over after hearing the news from your former classmate. You feel a bit let down.

4. Your former classmate has formed a new friendship, and you are considering ending your friendship with your current friend.

Perhaps it would be best to offer the sad questioner a hug first.

How might one respond when they hear someone say unkind things about them?

1. It might be best to avoid responding at this time. Perhaps it would be helpful to pretend you didn't hear it, but acknowledge your discomfort.

2. If you feel comfortable doing so, smile, nod, and look him in the eye. Let him know that you heard him and that you'd like to talk about it further.

Perhaps you could politely inquire about what she's saying and join the conversation.

If your friend hears what someone else says and chooses to ignore you,

If someone truly misunderstands you and ignores you because of a few words, it might be helpful to talk to them and try to communicate. However, I personally feel that this friend may not be the best fit for you. You might want to consider whether continuing the friendship is the best option for you.

How should one respond when faced with a former classmate?

Some people have a tendency to engage in idle talk and cause discord. How should one respond when encountering such an individual?

1. It might be helpful to be clear with the person who likes to spread rumors about your friend. Perhaps you could avoid talking to her.

2. If it is possible to avoid contact with this person, it would be best to do so.

If you find yourself in this situation, it might be helpful to remember that if you can't stay away, it's probably best to do more and say less.

It's possible that many of these feelings are rooted in assumptions. The questioner observed the former classmate with a friend and may have felt that they were discussing the questioner, that the friend had betrayed the questioner (the questioner had been so kind to the friend, waiting with her for her mother), and that the former classmate was showcasing her new friendship. Without confirmation, it's essential to approach this matter with fairness and impartiality. It's possible that this is just a minor misunderstanding.

Hello! It's clear you're currently feeling sad because a friend has distanced themselves from you. You must feel very uncomfortable, because it seems you haven't done anything wrong. This situation must be disappointing for you. But you can talk about this experience, and that's really worth encouraging yourself.

Let's express ourselves and get closer to the truth.

I saw that you were having a quiet conversation with your former classmate and former close friend. It seemed like there was a hidden meaning, which made you feel uncomfortable and confused. I also noticed that she was showing off and intimate, which I guess made you feel sad because it felt like your former classmate thought you had betrayed her. If this is the truth, it's going to be painful and disappointing. You have been misunderstood and hurt.

Think about it, honey. Is this really the truth?

Express your curiosity in the name of sincerity. Go ask them what interesting topics they were just chatting about and gain a deeper understanding. That's the only way you'll get to the truth.

When imagination takes control, you can choose to approach them a little closer and express yourself.

The past is the past. Let's focus on the present.

I don't know what the story is behind the comment "we used to get along," and I can't guess what kind of story is hidden in the "more sensitive" you become when you see them together. You need to talk about it or think about it. What kind of thing once made you unable to let go?

What if you let it go? Think about this question.

You will discover that the past is nothing to be denied or doubted, and that the present and future are full of possibilities!

Be courageous and be disliked if it means being true to yourself.

Dear, If you're honest with yourself, you'll realise that the truth is something you don't want to see. And if everything you fear is true, you can support yourself. If you find it difficult, you can accept it. Not everyone around us is someone with whom we resonate.

You can try to have the courage to be disliked. This is not about isolating ourselves from the world. It is about being confident and proactive in making contributions to others. We should not let the present and future pay for the past. We should not let ourselves pay for the "mistakes" of others, whether intentional or not. It is better to be yourself than to live in the shadow of others. You should be happier!

Read the book The Courage to Be Disliked. You'll like it. The world and I love you. May the sunshine warm you through the mountains and the sea. ♥️

Hug the original poster. I can feel the difficulty and sadness she is feeling. Her friend, who she cares about, didn't come over to keep her company.

The original poster is a girl with delicate emotions, so she will place more emphasis on feelings. Throughout the whole incident, the main topic of conversation has been speculation and feelings. The truth is clear. You should confirm it before making a final decision.

Speculation 1: My former classmate's face showed clear reluctance, as if she had been betrayed.

Speculation 2: It's about the conflict between her and me, and it's been exaggerated.

Speculation 3: The friend's behavior clearly showed that she was on my former classmate's side.

Speculation 4: My former classmate walked past me and shouted my friend's name loudly, in a very intimate tone. She was showing off and trying to make me feel bad.

There has to be another possibility.

"That friend was just embarrassed to have to say no to your former classmate," the friend then turned his head and looked at me a few more times. "She came over because you called out to her.

You need to ask that friend to find out what really happened.

You need to go and find out what happened. It's not fair to your friend to just consider whether you want to keep in touch with them.

On the other hand, if your friend really thinks that you are that kind of person just because of a few words from your classmate, she is not really your friend.

This incident made the host feel very hurt, but I see that because of this incident, the host has gained an opportunity to grow in interpersonal relationships. This is the chance to verify whether they are true friends. Interpersonal relationships are not as complicated as we think. You either gain or you learn.

The host can do a few things in the future to be more open-minded in interpersonal relationships:

1. Find out what really happened, not just speculate.

If you care about this friend, you need to find out what happened that day.

If this friend is evasive, speaks lightly of the matter, and then stops initiating contact with you, you should let her go.

If this friend explains the truth to you, you'll see that you were worrying for no reason.

2. Friends go in both directions. Our feelings are not always a reflection of reality.

"I'm usually very friendly to that friend, and I even waited with her for her mother."

The original poster may think you're a good friend, but your friend sees you as just someone who's friendly to everyone and happened to have time to wait with her for her mother.

We must stop subjectively projecting our thoughts onto others. We also need to communicate with each other more to know if we are really friends.

Good friends are people who reveal their secrets to each other and gossip together about things. They are two people who are in tune with each other and care about each other.

If a friend gives up on you because of a few words from a classmate, they are not a true friend.

3. Improve yourself, and you will attract friends who are in tune with you.

Good friends will make you feel like you can keep improving and progressing. You will appreciate each other and become better versions of yourselves.

If you like a butterfly, you don't chase it. You settle down and plant a garden to attract more beautiful butterflies.

Friendship between friends is as light as water. Even if you have good friends, they can socialize with other people. They have the freedom to make friends.

Let's be real, some people are just a passing phase in your life. They're only there for a while.

Your circle of friends will change after you graduate and get a job. Be comfortable with the comings and goings.

After this experience, the host will undoubtedly take things lightly and use your emotional sensitivity in art creation and humanistic writing, which is actually a great way to express yourself because you are particularly empathetic and can feel some details that others cannot. Focus on friends who share your interests and find a goal for your studies. Work hard for it and you will meet a stronger and better version of yourself. You've got this!

Hello,

Host:

I'm Zeng Chen, a heart exploration coach. I've read your post and I can see how you feel.

Also, I see that the poster has been open and honest in sharing their thoughts and actively sought help on the platform. This will undoubtedly help them gain a deeper understanding of themselves and their friends. It will also help them adjust their mindset.

Next, I'll share my observations and thoughts in the post, which might help the original poster see things from a different perspective.

1. Let's take a look at why we're feeling so sad.

In the post, you mentioned that your friend didn't come over to you after listening to what the former classmate said. I can relate to how you're feeling.

We were really nice to this friend, but after she heard some things from other people, she stopped coming over to our place. So, it's understandable that we'd feel sad.

Now, let's take a look at why we're feeling so sad. This should help us to understand ourselves better.

I get that the poster's sadness might have two sides to it. On the one hand, we all expect others to treat us the way we treat them.

If others don't meet our expectations, we might feel lost and sad.

As the host, you treated your friend with genuine enthusiasm, and you also hoped that she would reciprocate your feelings. Unfortunately, she didn't.

That's why the original poster is feeling sad. On the other hand, sadness may come from comparison.

Our sense of self-worth may be damaged and we may have some self-doubts when a friend chooses their former classmate, who doesn't seem to be doing well, which may be one aspect of your sadness.

2. Try to adjust your expectations.

We all want others to treat us the way we treat them. But the truth is that giving and receiving aren't the same thing.

So, maybe we can just let go of our expectations of our friends, and I think our emotional state will be better. Without expectations, there's no room for disappointment.

On the other hand, we have to accept that we can't control other people.

At this point, it might be best to focus on ourselves. If we're feeling a bit down, it's good to focus on the present and do something that makes us happy.

We can't control what other people do, but we can control ourselves and decide whether we want to be happy or sad.

This is something we can do. We can even adjust some unreasonable perceptions.

On the other hand, we talked about how there's a loss of value perception. We also need to realize that although how others perceive us is one way of knowing ourselves, there are other ways too. For example, we can know ourselves by understanding ourselves.

Input from our family and friends.

So we need to learn to understand ourselves from different points of view. That way, we can be more objective and rational in our understanding of ourselves.

3. Try to see the bright side.

It's clear that this situation has caused you pain and sadness. However, from my perspective, there may also be some positive aspects to consider.

I think it has also brought you a lot of benefits. For example, you have gained a deeper understanding of this friend.

We also gain insight into human nature. For example, we see that the former classmate had an inner sense of inadequacy, which is why she flaunted herself in front of you. We also see that a friend may lack assertiveness and just go along with the flow.

If we can look at this from a growth perspective, do you think the original poster has also gained a lot? We can see this heartbreak as the "tuition" we need to grow. When we learn it and apply it in our future lives, we may reap even more.

So, we might try to put off what we're losing for now, in the hope that we'll gain more in the future.

I hope these are useful and inspiring for you. If you're interested, you might also want to read "The Courage to Be Disliked" for more insights.

Hello, my name is Strawberry.

In light of the questioner's confessions and apparent sadness, I offer a hug as a gesture of solidarity. The questioner proceeds to the conference room to study in solitude. His former classmate joins him, taking a seat on the questioner's left. An aisle separates them. The former classmate is accompanied by the questioner's friend, who is more loquacious. Two empty seats adjacent to the questioner remain unoccupied. Upon noticing this, the friend expresses a desire to join the questioner. After the former classmate becomes aware of this, she discreetly pulls the questioner's friend aside and engages in a hushed conversation. After they conclude their discussion, the friend casts a few glances in the direction of the questioner but ultimately decides against joining him.

From their behavior, the questioner surmised that perhaps the former classmate had said something unkind about him to his friend, which might have prompted the friend to decline the invitation to come over. From their behavior and mannerisms, the questioner's thoughts seemed plausible. That is, the former classmate may have been attempting to create a rift between you and your friend, but the questioner did not hear it with his own ears, so even if we are wondering why your friend didn't come over to sit with you afterwards, we can't just assume that your former classmate was saying bad things about you.

I was a bit disappointed when my friend didn't come over to my side after listening to what the person at the previous table said.

It would be interesting to consider what a true friend might be.

The questioner said that her friend did not come and sit with her because her former classmate might have said something unkind about her. You were quite upset about her behavior. If her friend had not planned to sit with the questioner in the first place, would you still be feeling this way?

Given that we don't know what was said or what it meant when we watched, it's understandable that suspicion might lead to feelings of being consumed and stuck in a low mood. Let's consider it from another angle. The questioner described going to the study room to study by herself. Then you are all there to study. The former classmate didn't want the questioner's friend to go over, so was it because they had some homework to discuss together? Did your friend look at you a few times because she didn't sit over to see if you would say something?

It is, of course, only my guess. We can only speculate about what they are really saying when we don't hear it with our own ears. It would be unwise to let our friendships be affected by suspicions. The questioner treats the other person as a friend and is also very sincere with them. If the other person also treats the questioner as a friend, and in their interactions with you, they form an opinion of you based on what they have heard from others, then such a friend cannot be called a true friend.

It would be helpful to recognize where our emotions come from.

The questioner seems to be feeling a certain sadness because their friend didn't sit next to them. Perhaps it would be helpful to consider where this sadness comes from. Could it be that the sadness is rooted in something other than the fact that their friend didn't sit next to them?

Perhaps the questioner is not sad because her friend did not sit next to her, but because she is not confident in her friendship. It may be that you have tried your best to maintain a friendship, but after what your former classmate said, your friend believed her. However, their actions do not necessarily mean that your friend will no longer associate with you. Could I suggest that you try to see things from a different perspective?

It would be unfair to say that the former classmate did nothing, as her actions could be seen as deliberately provoking the questioner to care about her behaviour. If the questioner is sad because of this, then it could be said that her sadness is justified. In our social interactions, it is not always possible to have only one friend. If this friend chooses to spend time with the questioner's former classmate and less time with the questioner, then it could be perceived that the friendship is not as strong as it could be.

It might be helpful to learn to relieve yourself.

Due to their actions, the questioner's emotions have been affected, and it seems that she may lose a friend she has treated sincerely. It is possible to maintain the friendship as long as you take the initiative and adjust your mood. It is important not to let this behavior upset you. Treat this friend normally and observe her attitude during your time together. It may be helpful to maintain a certain distance.

You might find it helpful to watch a funny variety show or comedy movie you like, eat your favorite food, or see your favorite scenery. Asking a question on the platform is also a way to vent. You could also try looking at the issue from other people's perspectives, which might help the questioner feel that the matter is not worth being so sad about.

I hope my answer is helpful to the questioner. Wishing you well.

Hello, question asker. I'm Jiang 61, and I'm going to relieve your worries.

I have carefully read your account and understand that you are upset that your former friend won't sit with you in study hall because of what her former classmate told her. I can very much understand how you feel at this moment. You think that your friend betrayed you by not repaying your kindness when you waited with her for her mother, and that her behavior has hurt you. You want to end the friendship.

First, stop speculating and worrying unnecessarily.

Let me be clear: when you saw your friend, he or she looked at you a few times but didn't come over. You guessed that your friend heard something bad about you, so you didn't study with him or her. This is just your guess, and it's not true.

This includes your former classmate who used to spread gossip. You correctly deduced that she must have said something bad about you.

If it is as you suspect and your friend has abandoned you because they trusted the words of a villain over your friendship, then it's clear that such a friend is not worth keeping.

Let me be clear: someone who is untrustworthy cannot be called a friend.

Ask your friend to confirm the facts instead of worrying about it. If it really is as you suspect, such a friend is not worth keeping.

If it's not true, you're just causing yourself trouble. And misunderstandings are often caused by speculation.

Second, learn to adjust your emotions and mindset.

In the future, people will encounter all kinds of annoying things, and their emotions will naturally be affected. You must learn to adjust your emotions. If you don't, you will get caught up in them and be confused all day long, at a loss for what to do.

If you let your emotions control you, you'll be led around by the nose. Do you want to be like that? I didn't think so.

If you want to establish yourself in society and achieve great things in the future, you must learn to relax and know what is most important to you. Think about the things that can achieve great things for yourself. Ignore trivial matters like what she said about me today, and friends ignoring me.

It's not worth your time.

Second, learn to adjust your emotions. You must distinguish whether the emotions are caused by your feelings or the event itself whenever you encounter something annoying and become emotional.

Feelings cause emotional changes, and you must solve problems in feelings. If emotional changes are caused by events themselves, you must deal with the events.

Transform your emotions into a driving force for positive action.

Those who accomplish great things are respected by all. They are not concerned with trivial matters.

This questioner is what I want you to know. It's a reference.

I wish you well!

Have a nice day!

Greetings! I extend a warm embrace from afar as a gesture of support and solidarity.

The sensation of loneliness, grievance, sadness, and unhappiness can be experienced when one is isolated from the front desk and other students. This sensation is accompanied by a longing for acceptance, respect, understanding, and welcome.

In interpersonal relationships, the fundamental psychological needs of every human being include the desire to be liked, respected, accepted, and to have a sense of belonging. These needs contribute to feelings of safety, importance, and value. Consequently, it is important to recognize that feelings of distress, loneliness, sadness, and upset may arise when one feels unfriendly and isolated. These emotions serve as expressions and reactions to one's true physical and mental states in that moment.

It is recommended that one attempt to tolerate these distressing emotional sensations, acknowledge their presence, become aware of them, and allow oneself to experience them fully. One may consider deep breathing exercises as a means of better understanding one's emotions, alleviating the distress caused by their intensity, exploring the underlying needs that drive them, and seeking ways to respond to and meet those needs more effectively.

For example, one can endeavor to express one's genuine sentiments and necessities to one's classmates and the individual seated adjacent to one at that moment. However, one should refrain from evaluating their actions. Instead, one should simply convey one's authentic feelings and necessities, thereby enabling them to recognize that their actions have caused distress.

Additionally, composing a letter to a former classmate can facilitate the expression and organization of distressing emotional states associated with feelings of isolation. This approach enables the timely articulation of emotions, fostering enhanced emotional awareness and experience. The letter's content can be structured into five sections, encompassing anger, sadness, fear, self-blame, and care. By engaging in more effective communication with one's inner self through language, individuals can prevent themselves from being swept away by their emotions and reacting impulsively.

It can be reasonably deduced that only when an individual is calm on the inside will they possess the strength and resources to deal with their emotions and difficult situations in a more optimal manner. What are your thoughts on this matter?

It is also advisable to be mindful of your need for responses from the front desk and classmates, as well as your own capabilities. One may, for instance, endeavor to cultivate self-acceptance, recognizing both shortcomings and strengths. A gratitude journal may also be a beneficial practice for fostering self-confidence.

It is essential to respect one's genuine feelings and needs. Furthermore, it is crucial to take the initiative to enhance and cultivate one's social skills by deliberately pursuing a diverse range of interests and passions.

Indeed, our relationships with others frequently reflect our internal states. Do you perceive a sense of isolation and rejection from the students in the front row and others? Is it more probable that your feelings of rejection are a projection of your inner self?

However, this aspect is not yet apparent to you, so you unintentionally project your feelings of not accepting your inner self onto those around you. They unintentionally pick up on the hints you give off about your feelings of not accepting yourself and your lack of confidence, and they agree with your projection, that is, they respond to you in a way that is not as friendly as you would like. This makes you believe that you are really isolated and not welcome. This perception in turn reinforces your inner feelings of inferiority, lack of confidence, and not accepting yourself. What is your opinion on this matter?

It is therefore important and crucial for you to attempt to learn to accept yourself better and to cultivate self-confidence. This will help you to overcome the tendency to be affected and swayed by the emotional responses of others in relationships, and to pay particular attention to the words and actions of others.

It is recommended that the reader peruse the texts "Why are my emotions always influenced by others" and "Light Healing."

It is my hope that this contribution will prove beneficial and assistive to you.

Hello, host! I know you're feeling pretty down right now.

It turns out that your friend, who had been listening to your classmate, distanced herself from you. You were outnumbered and inexplicably isolated, and you didn't even get a chance to explain yourself. It really felt like a betrayal.

This reminds me of when I was in school. I was a bit like your classmate. I especially wanted my friends to be on my side, so I was very mean and told one of my friends not to play with the other. When I think about it now, I feel a bit ashamed. I'm sure the other friend was very sad at the time.

I was worried about you when I saw you looking so upset.

In this three-person relationship, you feel your classmate is being unfriendly and your friend is indecisive. You feel a little disgusted and angry with your classmate, and a little sad and lost with your friend, right?

To handle interpersonal relationships, you've got to understand the personalities of the people involved. Words can reveal a lot about a person. Let's talk about characterization and portrayal, which are often discussed in language classes.

[Character portrayal: your classmate]

They were a little loud, and my classmate looked a bit reluctant. It was the kind of look you get when someone betrays you and then whispers something in your ear (someone who even tells others to use their phone time to call their friends at other schools). As they walked past me, they shouted my friend's name in a tone of voice that made me feel like they were bragging.

[Your classmate's character image]

She's always commenting, competitive, likes to express her opinions when things happen, very proactive, and likes to show off a bit.

Character portrayal: You

That friend then turned to look at me a few times, and I pretended like I didn't know what was going on.

Normally, you're really friendly with that friend, and I've even gone with her while she's waiting for her mom.

I felt so embarrassed that I switched seats, not too far away from them.

You are a gentle person who doesn't want to get into conflicts with others.

She's gentle, quiet, considerate, and prefers harmonious interpersonal relationships. She avoids direct conflicts with others.

You didn't mention much about your friend, but I think the similarity is probably why you like her more. So, is she similar to you in personality, and is she also a gentle person who doesn't want to get into conflicts with others?

[Character + event]

You have a friend with whom you have a good relationship and who is relatively gentle in character. The strong-willed classmate and the gentle you are competing for the TA position, and she doesn't firmly stand on your side. When the classmate adds fuel to the fire, she seems to believe it, and you have no way to fight for it, so you can only bear it silently, which makes you feel sad and hurt.

You've been friends for a long time, and we don't get to know people overnight. As the old saying goes, "Time reveals people's hearts." I don't want to say that your friend will remember your kindness and not worry. What I want to discuss with you is:

What are you going to do with the rest of your time?

Have faith that "we are loved by everyone, flowers bloom everywhere, and we don't lack one or two friends."

You're a gentle, considerate person who loves harmony. I'm sure you have many other characteristics that aren't reflected in words. How could you not have friends? Just smile. I'm afraid you have too many friends and we can't keep up with them all.

Listen to your gut and speak up:

I like to stick with certain people and avoid others. Express yourself gently but directly: "The other day I saw you sitting on the other side, but I would have liked to sit with you. Would you like to sit with me during study hall today?" If your friend doesn't want to, that's fine.

Respect your friend's choice, give them freedom, and create a comfortable relationship.

If a friend is willing to sit with me, that's great. If not, I'm a little disappointed, but I can accept it. I can sit with someone else or by myself. This way of getting along will give the people around you a sense of comfortable freedom and make you more popular.

At the end of the day, we all like to be around people who make us feel comfortable.

It's important to distinguish between other people's attitudes and your own self-assessment.

If someone doesn't like you or even talks behind your back, you can choose to ignore them. Some people like watermelons and don't like oranges. We can't say that oranges are not nutritious, right?

If someone has done something that makes you feel uncomfortable, you can also say, "I don't like your behavior, and I hope you won't do it again."

As you grow, you'll meet lots of different people with different personalities. Some will like you, some won't, some will believe in you, and some will doubt you. These likes and trusts will change over time and with the relationship. This is how time reveals people's hearts.

During these long days, remember to be kind to yourself and believe in yourself! The world and I love you.

Dear Questioner, I extend my support to you through a gesture of physical affection. From your words, I understand your desire for a friendship between colleagues.

At the same time, I have some reservations. Based on the information available, it seems that our conflict was discussed at length and that it was exaggerated. However, this has not been confirmed. It is possible that other topics were discussed or that the topic owner was the focus of the conversation. These are all plausible scenarios, but we have no way of knowing the truth. When we have doubts, it is important to ask questions and seek clarification. This could involve asking, "Hey, xxx, what are you guys talking about? Someone is coming over, so you better move. We have something to say, and you have something in line." It is also worth questioning why one would doubt but not ask to confirm and then conclude that "they are talking about me, about our conflict..." This is something that requires further reflection and investigation.

After listening to the whispers of her tablemate, the friend turned to look at the questioner a few times, while the questioner pretended not to see. At this time, it is possible that she wanted to come over to you, but she gave up when she saw that you did not make a move. It could also be that she wanted you to help her get rid of "someone." There are many possibilities, so when we are in doubt, should we ask questions to clarify the situation, or should we proceed with caution? This may be a key point.

"I felt awkward being there alone, so I changed my seat, not too far away from them." This may be an intentional way to avoid embarrassment. It's a pattern of behavior. The more you care, the more embarrassed you feel, the more you want to escape. Why didn't you move far away? It just shows that you care about it and are afraid to get close to what you care about. It makes me think of the attachment pattern. I don't know what the questioner's growth experience was like. Family growth experiences may form a person's fixed attachment pattern.

In summary, a significant portion of sadness appears to be justified, yet a considerable amount is rooted in one's own imagination. Imagination represents a fundamental aspect of human thought. To ensure optimal outcomes, it is essential to ground our actions in reality, demonstrate courage in seeking clarity when needed, communicate our needs promptly, and cultivate resilience in the face of challenges.

Do not allow these assumptions to discourage you. I am confident that you will succeed.

I believe your awareness is particularly commendable and will undoubtedly prove beneficial to you. Wishing you the best.