I will be a senior next semester. I am recently confused and entangled in my relationships. What advice do you have?

Hello, question asker! First of all, I want to give you a big hug because you are standing at a crossroads in life, facing the dual choice between relationships and dreams. This is indeed not an easy task, but you can do it.

You're at a crossroads in your senior year, poised between campus and society. Every step is significant and carries weight. But remember, no matter which path you choose, you have the power to make it a success.

I can feel your inner struggle and confusion. You are reluctant to let go of this relationship and nostalgic for it, but you also love your dream. This dilemma makes people want to hold onto the warmth but not give up the starlight.

You're not alone in this. Everyone goes through these emotions when growing up. We're here with you.

Let's try to understand this relationship from another perspective. The man you mentioned was there for you during your low points, but he seems more aggressive and sensitive when dealing with problems.

Behind this, there may be his own insecurities and deep expectations for the relationship. And you, as an independent and dreamy woman, your world is not just limited to the emotional entanglements of two people.

Your live-streaming career is your passion and a key part of your self-realization. Balancing this with your personal life is an important aspect of your growth.

I'm going to tell you a story. There was a girl who also once struggled between her dream and her love.

She loves to paint, but her boyfriend wants her to give it up and focus on their life together. She chooses to pursue her dream. She experiences a short period of pain and separation, but she finds that when she devotes herself to her creation, the light from within attracts more people with the same frequency, including her partner, who eventually understands and supports her.

This story makes it clear: true love is understanding, respecting, and supporting each other's dreams.

In psychology, there is a concept called "self-fulfilling prophecy," which means that if a person believes in a prophecy, his behavior will unconsciously make the prophecy come true. In this situation, if you are always worried that he doesn't understand you and doesn't trust you, you need to recognize that these emotions may affect your behavior, which in turn will exacerbate his sense of mistrust, creating a vicious cycle.

You need to adjust your mindset and communicate in a more open and positive way to break the cycle.

You need to decide how to balance your personal dreams with your emotional relationship. You must be clear about what is most important to you.

You need to decide whether you want to continue pursuing your dream of a broadcasting career or give up part of yourself for him and try to rebuild the relationship.

You must decide whether you want to continue pursuing your dream of a broadcasting career or give up part of yourself for him and try to rebuild the relationship. At the same time, you should also consider whether he is willing and able to be your partner on the road to pursuing your dreams, rather than an obstacle.

Here are some tips for approaching this issue.

1. Have a deep conversation to build consensus.

Find a moment when you both feel relaxed and comfortable, such as a quiet café on a weekend afternoon, and sit down and talk face-to-face. At the beginning, share some lighthearted topics and then guide the conversation towards your relationship and each other's dreams.

Tell him how you feel. Use the "I" language to express your feelings and needs. For example: "I feel that broadcasting is not just a job for me. It is a way for me to express myself and realize my self-worth. I hope you can understand and support me."

"Also encourage him to express his thoughts and feelings, and together find a mutually acceptable balance.

2. Set boundaries and increase trust.

To eliminate any misunderstandings or suspicions, you should take the initiative to set some clear boundaries and let him know the importance of these boundaries. For example, you can tell him, "I am just a casual friend with that Iron Fan, and our conversations are always appropriate."

"I can take the initiative to reduce my personal interactions with him, and I can even show you the content of our conversations." "Ask him to express his specific concerns and expectations so that you can better understand each other and enhance trust."

3. Enhance your attractiveness through self-improvement.

No matter where your relationship leads, remember that self-growth is always important. Use your spare time to learn new live streaming skills, improve your professionalism, or try to expand your interests in other fields.

As you become better and more confident, you will undoubtedly find that everyone around you will be attracted to your radiance, including him. Moreover, self-growth will also make you more clear about your goals and direction, laying a solid foundation for future choices.

4. Get professional help to broaden your horizons.

If you're in a tough spot in your relationship and need help getting out, consider talking to a professional counselor. They'll use their expertise to help you think through the issues, clarify your thoughts, and find the best solution for you.

You should also expand your social circle by taking part in social activities or joining interest groups. This will allow you to meet more like-minded people and open up new possibilities for your future.

5. Give yourself time to move on.

Give yourself enough time to adapt and adjust, regardless of the choice you make. Relationships don't happen overnight; they take time to settle and ferment.

If you choose to break up, don't rush to forget or escape. Accept reality and let go slowly. Soothe your emotions and relax your mood by traveling, keeping a diary, listening to music, etc.

Time is the best healer. It will make you stronger and more mature.

6. Stay positive and embrace the future.

Last but not least, maintain a positive attitude. You will undoubtedly face challenges and opportunities in the future, but you can handle them. Believe in your abilities and use your wisdom to overcome any obstacles.

You can make a clear plan for the future and work hard towards it. At the same time, you should also learn to appreciate the scenery and beautiful moments along the way, so that your life is full of sunshine and color.

Dear friend, trust your intuition and courage. You will inevitably face twists and challenges, but these experiences make us more resilient and mature.

You have infinite possibilities and choices. No matter what the future holds, keep your love for life and your pursuit of your dreams.

We are here to cheer for you and wish you well. You will embrace love and pursue your dreams with courage in the days to come.

The questioner is under a lot of pressure. The relationship is already tense. Can it be solved by not doing live streaming? Or does the questioner think that if he doesn't chat with that diehard fan, he will feel at ease and the relationship will get better?

If someone doesn't feel secure, it's not just about the environment. It's also about their own distrust and questioning of themselves. They need to look for the reason in themselves, rather than forcing others to do things a certain way. The questioner and that fan just chat, and there are no personal feelings involved. It's normal for anchors and fans to interact during a live broadcast. But the boyfriend can't understand or accept it, so that's a problem he needs to face.

If he doesn't feel secure, will he trust the questioner? The questioner already has opinions about her boyfriend and doesn't trust him. If she doesn't become an anchor, will he trust her?

The question also requires a good chat between the questioner and the other party. Being an anchor has no impact on the questioner's studies and has brought economic income, which is beneficial. Why give it up? Relationships require the efforts of both people to maintain.

These are just my opinions.

Hello! You were once accompanied by this amazing boy during a low period, which touched you deeply. Later, you felt that your values matched, so you started dating—and it was the best decision you ever made!

But recently, when conflicts arise, you find that you don't see eye to eye on how to deal with differences and conflicts. Your partner seems to be very insecure and lacks trust in the relationship. They will ask you to make a choice between "this or that," as if this is a condition for continuing to develop the relationship. This makes you feel tired and you doubt whether your relationship is still the same as before. But don't worry! This is an opportunity for you to grow and learn more about yourself and your partner. It's a chance to show your partner that you're willing to work through these challenges together.

You have the exciting opportunity to consider whether you should give up your career or your favorite things for the sake of intimacy! First of all, you are very sure about your thoughts on live streaming, and asking you to give it up may mean a big sacrifice.

However, emotions become really interesting when it comes to "who sacrifices for whom." Emotions may be in an unbalanced state, and when conflicts or fluctuations in life arise, it is easy to trigger regret in one party and guilt in the other, which presents an opportunity to work through these feelings in a way that strengthens the intimate relationship.

Second, if the other person lacks a sense of security and trust, then even if you make this compromise, similar situations may arise in the future. For example, after you graduate and start working, it is inevitable that you will get to know male colleagues in the course of your career development, including outstanding and likeable colleagues and friends. At that time, if your boyfriend is once again caught up in doubts and anxieties and asks you to give up your relationships, it may also cause you a lot of pressure and trouble. But, you can rise to the occasion!

In addition, his communication and way of getting along with others seems to have an attitude of "you must do this or I will do that." You can carefully observe how you feel about this. Sometimes when rational judgment is at a loss, we need to listen to our emotions and feelings, which are often more real and can better reflect our deep-seated needs.

However, because you've been communicating online and haven't met in person yet, there's still so much potential for mutual understanding! Face-to-face communication often brings a different feeling, so if you're feeling a sense of loss and attachment to the relationship, you might consider meeting him to discuss your concerns, fears, and emotions openly. You never know—you might gain a new understanding of each other and the relationship!

Hello, question asker. I'm Gu Daoxi Fengshou Slender Donkey, your Heart Exploration coach.

Dating is tiring. It's normal to feel confused and struggle. Please don't worry.

It seems like a conflict between the two parties, but it may be a problem of differences and boundaries. The questioner will have connections with the opposite sex.

I don't know if the other person objects to the questioner communicating with the opposite sex or if the questioner has crossed a line. Understanding the root cause of the other person's objection may help the questioner see what the problem is.

The questioner should ask himself if he is willing to give up a lot for the other person. He doesn't want the questioner to chat with the opposite sex, and will he interfere with the questioner's freedom to choose a career in the future? You need to know how to get along with other people of the opposite sex when you have a lover, but is the other person unreasonable?

The live broadcast may be fine, and the questioner has not made any compromises because of the traffic. The other person has shown that they are bothered by things that are beyond the boundaries, so perhaps the questioner needs to consider whether they are suitable for each other.

You can't do everything at once. The questioner isn't ready to settle down. Focus on the present to open up future options. Don't give up everything for one thing.

People can't have both things at once. If they don't have the same values, they'll argue. The other person wants the topic owner to get back together with them, but they have conditions. Will the topic owner accept these conditions and make compromises? If not, it's best to think it over.

It takes time to adjust from a busy relationship to being alone. Try to calm down, think about what's best, and then make a decision. This will help you make a better choice.

When we're emotional, we say extreme things. The worst a person does often reflects the lowest point of the other person's character. If the questioner can accept this, future conflicts can be resolved. If not, it's better to consider it carefully.

I once read that judging a person based on whether they are rich or handsome is probably better than judging them based on whether they are good to you. It is easy to pretend to be good to someone, and promises may not be as credible. It may be more helpful to see what the other person does than what they say.

If you can't become lovers, it may be difficult to return to a friend's status. Either you never loved each other or never gave up hope.

The main point is not to reconcile with the other person. Ask yourself what you like about them. I love you because I know your faults and am willing to tolerate you. If you're only attracted to their good points, conflicts may arise.

When you can't decide, go ahead and shoot. You might calm down and see the light.

Read: "How to Hug a Hedgehog," "If I Knew Before Marriage," "Emotional Extortion."

Best wishes!

Hello!

A big, warm pat on the shoulder!

Next semester I'll be a senior! I'm feeling a little confused and torn about my relationship, but I'm excited to hear your advice!

The girl already has the answer in her heart, and she's going to find it! Unlike relationships, she can't just give up on her work. She's been streaming and working part-time for a year, and the thought of giving it up is hard to let go of, not to mention the relationship that has accompanied her through the low times. However, once there is a trust breach in a relationship, it is difficult to repair it. So, she's going to have to work harder than ever to make it right!

In life, we see two completely different emotional relationships: one is always fighting, but they can't stay apart, and the other is a stable relationship that develops evenly. Sometimes they are very close, but whenever they fight, they are on the verge of breaking up. Why is this? Let's explore this further!

The answer is simple! For couples who are always fighting but can't break up, there's one thing that can make all the difference: trust. Even if there are differences in understanding and values, and there are constant conflicts, arguing can actually help couples understand each other better. It can bring them closer together and make their emotional connection even stronger. The relationship can be mutually satisfying! For couples in a stable relationship, when they have a fight, it may directly involve a crisis of trust. This can be a sign that the trust between them is very fragile, or that they may not have the mental energy to maintain it. When this happens, it's an opportunity for couples to work on rebuilding their trust.

In the case of the questioner, it is closer to the latter, which is great! On the one hand, the understanding of the relationship online lacks the basis for establishing a real relationship, and trust is not easy to establish. Fortunately, after many years of companionship and support, this part of the emotional energy is real and exists. It can still provide comfort and spiritual strength until now, but the boyfriend's distrust of the relationship is also real, and this distrust will breed other conflicts in the fragile state of the relationship, which will continue to drain this part of the emotional energy.

So, right from the start, the girl was eager to please her boyfriend and show him how much she appreciated him. As their relationship grew, she was excited to see what new things they could try together. However, her boyfriend was pushing her to choose between her work and her emotions. This made her feel like she wasn't being heard or understood. On top of that, her boyfriend's lack of communication and honesty were making her feel like she couldn't trust him.

Just imagine for a moment that your boyfriend fully supported your work and did not interfere with your right to work. What would that feel like? It would be a feeling of incredible empowerment and spiritual freedom! So the real need of the questioner is actually a desire to be understood and supported, and to be recognized for their work.

However, it seems that her boyfriend is unable to do so at this stage. Another problem in the relationship is that they have not met offline, but they have already talked about their future development. It's great that they're thinking about the future! But is it really the right choice to consider all the problems in the relationship in one go? And can they really be solved at once?

The answer is a resounding "no." We can't solve all problems at once, and that's okay! The pace of falling in love has also caused some problems, but it's nothing that can't be fixed. A healthy intimate relationship should consider things at different stages, and that's what makes it exciting! Individual abilities are limited, but with time, we can accumulate them. We can also build understanding and trust in the relationship gradually.

So, the question is very clear. Volatile emotions will indeed bring heavy inner pressure, but the core problem in the relationship is that the two parties have not yet established a foundation of true understanding and trust. Therefore, blindly making a choice will only increase the burden and risk pressure. So the first thing to establish is an unobstructed communication channel, which is an exciting step to take!

Express your true feelings and thoughts honestly to the other person. Get sincere communication and trust from the other person. Discuss the problem together and solve it! If your boyfriend still refuses to communicate, it's impossible to establish trust and talk about anything else. But if you can communicate, get to know each other! Understand each other's ideas, values, views on love and marriage, and develop a world view. With a comprehensive understanding, we can truly know a person. Understanding will change with the stages, so trust is essential!

Once the relationship is restored, it's important to remember that each person still has their own boundaries. Work is a separate issue from love. It's about respecting each person's individual rights. If you want a healthy, long-lasting relationship, you need to establish it on a foundation of respect.

Ultimately, the choice to restore the relationship is up to you! If you're not sure yet, give yourself more time. When you're ready, your heart will tell you what you truly want. And remember, choosing comes with responsibility, but so does growing up!

I really hope the above answers can help you!

Best of luck!

Hello! I really hope my answer can help you in some way.

You say that once you choose him, you won't be able to broadcast live anymore. From my point of view, you just haven't established a deep connection in the relationship and haven't formed a relationship of sufficient trust. So, he was so upset because you were chatting with an iron fan, and you feel that he doesn't understand you enough. You need understanding, but what should the specific behavior of understanding be? Perhaps you can express this clearly to him. If he is willing for you to make some adjustments, and in order to give him a sense of security in the relationship and to further establish the trust you have in the relationship, what does he hope you can do specifically? All of these things can actually be negotiated and balanced. The important thing is to see each other's needs and to gauge whether you have the ability and willingness to meet each other's needs. If you feel that he is unable to meet your core needs in the relationship, then choosing to let go is also an option. Of course, the final choice is up to you. In the face of this current reality, see what outcome you are more willing to bear, and then we will make the choice we are willing to make.

I've got some great advice for you!

A great intimate relationship is one where you can establish a deep emotional connection and have a solid foundation of trust. This allows you to mutually satisfy each other's core needs, which is an amazing feeling! You can assess whether you can do this in your relationship.

It's important to remember that no relationship is perfect. When conflicts arise, it's an opportunity to learn and grow. If you can identify what your needs are and communicate them to your partner, you can work together to find solutions. However, if you find that your needs aren't being met, it might be time to consider making a change.

So, it's totally normal for conflicts and contradictions to arise in a relationship. And it doesn't mean there's no love! In fact, when there are contradictions and conflicts, it's a great chance to promote mutual understanding between the two parties. Let's say you didn't give him a gift and he got jealous. Well, that's because he's feeling insecure in the relationship and needs to be seen and valued by you. Maybe this is his core need, and he's hoping you can tell him how to satisfy it. You can invite him to talk about it himself, like what festivals to give him gifts, how to set boundaries when chatting with fans, and so on. You can negotiate with him based on your own situation and show him you value and care about him. When he can feel your attention and care in the relationship, he'll gradually start to feel secure, and those jealous and angry behaviors will naturally become less and less, until they disappear. And your needs seem to be understood, so what do you need him to do specifically to understand you?

This also requires sincere and consistent expression in the relationship. For example, if you chat with a fan, you can show him the chat history, tell him that you have boundaries, that you love your live streaming career, and hope for his support and understanding. Emphasize that you will not neglect him because of this—you'll make time for him because you value your relationship!

Once you've identified your core needs in the relationship, you can evaluate whether you can provide each other with the value you need. If you think you can, then you can communicate with him well and continue to manage your relationship. If you find it difficult to do so and you are not willing to spend so much energy on adjusting and managing it, then choosing to let go of the relationship is also an option. There is no right or wrong, just choose according to your own needs!

2. Learn to separate issues, make your own choices, and take responsibility for them. It's an empowering process!

As we grow older and face graduation and entering society, as well as our own work and intimate relationships, we will have the incredible opportunity to make many choices. Psychology has a very useful tool for dealing with choices: issue separation. Look at the choices you face, what are the consequences of each, and what are you willing to accept for each consequence. Then make your own choice. The final choice is one we willingly choose, not one we are forced to make.

For example, you can choose to continue dating him and give up your live streaming career. That's a choice, and you get to bear all the consequences of that choice. You can also choose to break up with him, and then you also get to bear all the consequences of that choice. For example, your live streaming career will not be affected too much by his involvement, but you will lose the relationship, etc. You can also choose to spend some more time with him, and give yourself a deadline. During this period, you get to try to communicate with him sincerely and consistently, and try to establish a deep connection and a genuine trusting relationship. That will require you to spend more time and energy on your relationship, but it'll be worth it!

Guess what! Making your own choices about what you eat is the first step to becoming more independent and free in your relationships.

I hope this is helpful for you! Best wishes!

Hello! I'm Qu Huidong, a psychological counselor who loves to use images to help people.

After reading the questioner's emotional confusion, I want to say: Don't sacrifice your happiness and dreams to please others. Your value and happiness are defined by yourself! Of course, I also know that such encouraging words may not necessarily help you get out of your dilemma and make a choice, because we understand our own internal and realistic needs, and that is how we can more clearly define our own values and happiness. But I'm here to tell you that you can do it!

Now for some fun! Read the questions, then jot down your answers. Sometimes our gut is right! Let your instincts guide you to the best answers.

How would you rate the relationship at the moment? 10 is very satisfied, and 0 is very bad.

Please give a score without thinking. This score is not absolute, but it can help you gain a clearer understanding of your current level of satisfaction with the relationship, which is really exciting!

Now for the fun part! Think about what compromises you are willing to make for the sake of the relationship. In a relationship, both parties need to make certain concessions and compromises to maintain harmony.

However, these sacrifices and compromises should be based on mutual understanding and respect—and they can be!

Third, are you still in agreement on important values and goals? This is also an important factor in the stability of a relationship, and it's a great one!

If you have serious differences in important values and life goals, this could become a major obstacle in your relationship. But don't worry! You can easily overcome this by seriously considering whether you still have common ground in these areas and whether this common ground is sufficient to support your relationship.

Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship. If he has unresolved trust issues, this could indeed become a persistent problem in your relationship. But don't worry! You can work through this together. Talk to him openly about your feelings and see if he can understand your position. Then, you can both work to resolve the trust issues.

If he insists on making a commitment to the future based on "if you do this, I'll do that," it's clear that he's immature. This is a very important decision that will affect the future of both of you. But don't worry! You can make this decision together.

You need to think about whether you're ready to make these changes for him and whether this is the future you really want.

Finally, regarding personal growth and career planning, this is a very critical issue. You mentioned that live streaming is your side business and something you love, which is fantastic!

Giving up the live broadcast is a request for him, but for you it may be giving up your dreams and pursuits. This is your chance to think seriously about your personal values and dreams, and to make sure they are respected and supported!

Take some time for yourself to think about your feelings and future plans. And don't forget to communicate your thoughts and feelings with him! You might find a solution that works for both of you.

No matter what you choose, believe in yourself! You have the ability to find happiness and success on your own.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello, I'm Tongyan.

You're a junior college student, and you've developed feelings for a guy you met while working as a live-streaming blogger. You've become an online couple.

You haven't met in person until now. In the process, you've had two major conflicts. The other person is radical, prone to emotional outbursts, and impulsive. For example, they proposed breaking up after an argument.

But after the event, he'll come back to care about you. He'll also make demands of you, like not chatting with that iron powder. You'll feel like you can't work in the live broadcast industry if you're with him.

This person has a strong sense of possession and control.

Your confusion and uncertainty are likely rooted in his care and concern for you, as well as the fact that during your brief online interactions, you also sensed his emotional instability, strong sense of control, and possessiveness.

You need advice from other people to help you sort out your thoughts and feelings.

You're still a junior, so I don't know what your plans are for your future life.

You need to figure out what kind of plan you have for the next few years. Do you want to pursue a particular career?

If your job conflicts with his ideas after you get together, what do you think he'll expect you to do, and what do you expect from him? Can you come to an agreement?

You should talk to him about his vision of the future. Find out what kind of person he hopes his future partner will be.

Tell me, what kind of work do you do? Do you need to be the center of the family and yourself?

You should also ask yourself what kind of person you want your future partner to be and what kind of support you want from him.

What kind of satisfaction do you expect from your future intimate relationship?

Intimacy is a process of seeking common ground while reserving differences. At the beginning of every relationship, we may be attracted to the other person because of their strengths. However, the most important factor in maintaining a stable and lasting intimate relationship is whether both parties can accept each other's shortcomings, understand each other's differences, and allow the other person to be themselves.

You should give yourself more time to plan for your future and explore your inner needs.

Express your confusion to your friends and family. Discuss it with them. You will find a decision that is more in line with your needs in such a relationship.

A good intimate relationship must grow together. There is no need for one party to sacrifice for the other.

Good intimate relationships are reciprocal and can be discussed.

You need to follow your own inner feelings and needs, especially at your age.

Best regards,