I'm a 28-year-old guy, and my mother still treats me like a child. How can I get away from that?

Hello, I'm Jianlin, a psychological counselor.

I understand your confusion. I feel the same way. Each of us is a treasure in our parents' hearts and an irreplaceable treasure.

Each of us is the person they have devoted their lives to caring for. We are the person they have the highest expectations for and care about the most.

In this respect, we must try to understand them. Of course, this understanding also brings us a little confusion.

We must decide whether to accept their overbearing care.

As we said before, we understand his concern. We should help him solve this problem. First, we tell him, "I'm an adult. I can handle everything myself."

Everything will be fine with you. It's a learning process for you, so there's no need to worry. You need to convey this idea to them.

Help them understand the problem of correctly viewing themselves and teach them to regulate their attention. This often occurs when parents are retired or have limited activities at home.

Their attention is mainly focused on you. Let them travel more or go out to exercise.

Keep them occupied. Divert their attention to their hobbies or the things they need to do.

His focus will naturally shift away from you, which will be much better for you both. Make sure you cultivate their interests and hobbies to make their later life more colorful.

At the same time, we must take responsibility for our own actions. As adults, we have the capacity to make our own decisions and act independently.

You must lie to your parents. Tell them your strengths and that you can handle anything.

You should also tell them about your good side, your successful side, and how you resolved your dilemma.

Minimize your negative side and be confident in your ability to handle change. Explain that the result is the beginning, not the time, and that self-control is essential.

Let him know you're doing well outside and that you're an excellent person who can handle anything. This will help ease his natural worry about you.

We have conducted an analysis from the perspective of understanding them in response to your confusion. We have also tackled the problem from two aspects.

We can care for them in an understanding way as long as we continue to do this. We must build our own psychological foundation and believe that this confusion will definitely be resolved, or it will get a lot better, with time. What do you think?

I am confident that this will be helpful. Thank you.

Everyone has the potential to be a beacon, whether asking questions or answering them. Through words, we can help to illuminate the hearts of more people, and this is our shared energy.

Hello, I am a heart exploration coach. I can sense your feelings of depression, frustration, and even anger. As an adult, your mother's tendency to express concern about everything may make you feel as though you have lost your freedom and are being controlled to some extent.

You may not want to be seen as a "mama's boy" and would prefer to have your own sense of independence. Perhaps it would be helpful to take a look at the issues that are troubling you.

You may find yourself longing for a greater sense of freedom and autonomy, and seeking ways to navigate your relationship with your mother in a more independent manner.

It is not uncommon for parents who love their children deeply to sometimes inadvertently cause them harm. While their actions are motivated by love, the result is often distress for their children.

There was once an article about a man, A, who expressed his desire for an apple, but another man, B, gave him a cartload of pears instead. A said helplessly, "I just want an apple," and B said, somewhat aggrieved, "I gave you a cartload of pears, everything I had."

It is important to distinguish between communication and control, particularly in our most significant relationships, where there is often a tendency for control to manifest in various ways.

When we try to control others, it can drain our energy, just as impatience and complaints can. It's important to remember that everyone has their own goals and ways of doing things. We can't expect others to do things our way all the time.

It is also worth noting that communication plays an important role in relationships, as relationships are a fundamental aspect of our lives.

It seems that the pattern of "controlling" and "being controlled" that you and your mother have formed may have originated from your daily interactions. It's possible that your actions or inactions have made your mother feel "uncomfortable" or "worried about you."

Once you recognize this pattern, you will be in a position to make your own choices. Through open communication and practical actions, you can gently guide your mother to recognize that you are an adult who can make your own decisions, take care of yourself, and shoulder certain responsibilities and pressures.

It's important to remember that complaining will only lead to frustration and damage the relationship. Effective communication is about expressing your views and feelings in a way that shows you're open to hearing your mother's perspective. You might find it helpful to tell your mother that her love for you can sometimes feel overbearing and make you feel pressured and "powerless."

It would be beneficial to listen to your mother's feelings and why she asks about everything. This may help her feel more at ease.

When emotions are calm, perspectives and goals are aligned, and the needs of the other party are met within the limits of both parties' abilities, such as reducing the number of times your mother calls you, etc., then problems can be solved together.

2. It might be helpful to put yourself in your mother's shoes and try to understand her good intentions behind her actions.

Your mother often calls you to ask about everything, and her constant questioning can sometimes make you feel a bit uncomfortable and stressed. But if you were to look at the situation from your mother's perspective, you might see that she's just trying to be caring and loving, and worried about you.

It might be helpful to separate the identity of a mother from her behavior, avoid labeling her, and refrain from labeling yourself. When you see the needs she wants to be met, you may find it easier to understand her behavior.

From her perspective, her understanding of "loving" her child is to worry about and inquire about everything, which is closely related to her background, experience, and environment.

It is understandable that parents will always worry about their children, regardless of their age. It is important to understand your parents and appreciate the time when your mother is still concerned about you and asks you questions.

It would be beneficial to approach them with understanding and work together to find solutions through effective communication.

It is my sincere hope that the above has provided you with a new perspective, with more choices, and that you will accept my love for you and the world.

If you would like to continue the conversation, you are welcome to click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom. I would be delighted to communicate and grow with you one-on-one.

Dear questioner,

I'm Kelly. I'm happy for you. You're perceptive, have boundaries, are independent, and thoughtful.

Let's be real, a lot of people your age still need to rely on their parents. They have no independence and are completely unaware of boundaries.

✍️[About mom calling]

When your mother calls you and shows concern, it shows that you have a good relationship. Many people grow up with boundaries, but are emotionally isolated. The boundaries are too clear, and your mother keeps calling you. I am certain that your relationship should have always been good. I assume that

1. The questioner should still be single. In the eyes of their parents, a single child is still a child.

2: You feel the pressure of your mother's emotions, and it's likely that it's also the mother's real pressure or anxiety. Many people are anxious that they don't feel it, but the emotions are undoubtedly being transmitted to you, so you will feel very annoyed. I especially understand you.

I am very sensitive, even on the phone. I can feel my parents' emotions in their voice and tone of voice, so it affects me.

3: Many people have parents, but their parents never care. I know a lot of people like this.

They feel lonely because their parents don't see them.

The family is together as long as parents are around.

I'm sure you're happy to have a mother who loves you so much.

[Your emotions]

I can tell you've been going through a lot recently, dealing with work pressure and job hunting. It's great you're here to talk about it. It's good to know you're facing pressure and will find a way out. I read something today about how you feel controlled by your mother. I'd like to share it with you for reference:

"When a mother controls her child with love, the child's disobedience is full of moral anxiety. She is afraid of the punishment that comes with disobedience, and also deeply feels guilty for failing to live up to her mother's love. Under this psychological influence, the child will hide their own wishes and no longer dare to express their own needs.

When obedience becomes second nature, he has no inner self left but his mother. He completely lives up to what his mother wants, and all his dissatisfaction and grievances are suppressed in the corner of his heart along with the abandoned self.

From then on, he lost the ability to say "no" to his mother. He never grew up.

As an adult, he knew exactly what his problem was and that he had the ability to fight back. He simply lacked the strength to do so.

Ultimately, he gave up on himself.

The questioner is obviously different from him. You are tired of it and you refuse to accept it. You will not give up on yourself either.

You can choose whatever you like.

It is especially challenging to recognize your own emotions.

Let's think of a way together.

You must communicate with your mother.

1: Make a clear agreement with your mother about the time to call once or twice a week. Tell her you've been preparing for an interview recently and you need to study at the library at the same time. This will reassure her that you're working hard.

2: You have also left your hometown, and your mother's concerns are also your concerns, which will indeed affect your mood. This is the perfect opportunity to set things straight with your mother: you need to focus on doing things, and let her take care of herself as well.

3: Be honest with your mother. Let her have her own hobbies, read, or do whatever she likes.

My daughter is also not in the same city, studying away from home. She knows I will worry, so she sends me a message a day, and occasionally sends a photo to let me know what she is doing. She also tells me she is fine, and I know she is.

Call once or twice a week. The questioner can try it.

4: All parents have the same heart. I have my own interests and hobbies, and I started to distract myself so that I don't just focus on my daughter.

✍️[Mom feels insecure]

You know your mother better than anyone else. The number of phone calls has decreased, but you need to make sure she's not too surprised. Your mother also has emotions, so it's important to put her mind at ease.

Be yourself. Here's a quote for you:

Everyone has the right to alienate themselves, but they have no right to alienate their children.

His children are born free.

He has the right to be free, and no one can take that away from him.

Hello! I'm Warm-hearted Girl 1219, and I'm happy to answer your question about Yi Xinli.

From your description, I can see your mother loves you.

I understand you're annoyed by your mother's calls about your job search, but she's just concerned.

All parents love their children, especially mothers. Mothers always care for their children.

I have some suggestions for you.

?1. Talk to your mother and ask her to give you some freedom.

Your mother is concerned about you because she worries you may not be able to take care of yourself. As long as you have a stable income and a family, she won't worry too much.

You can talk to your mother more. Tell her what's on your mind and ask her to understand.

2. Understand your mother's difficulties.

Mothers love their children. They have gone through a lot to bring them into this world.

Please understand your mother loves you. Don't get annoyed with her. Even if she doesn't say anything, she must be sad.

3. Show more concern for your mother's health.

You should care about your mother's health even though you work and live far away from home.

A mother worries about her child even when he is far away. Your mother called because she misses you.

She must feel lonely. She called because you weren't there.

She hoped you would call, but you didn't, so she called you.

Mothers worry about their children. Try to understand your mother.

I hope this helps. Best regards!

Greetings. My name is Jiang 61.

Firstly, I would like to express my gratitude for placing your trust in us and for sharing your concerns in the hope of finding solutions. From your initial correspondence, it is evident that your mother is deeply concerned about your circumstances. If you can gain an understanding of her psychology in this regard, it may help to alleviate your distress.

1. Mama's boy

Despite my age of 28, my mother continues to contact me on a daily basis, seeking updates on my activities.

1. Psychological

A pervasive sense of worthlessness

On the surface, a mama's boy is perceived as a burden to his mother, who calls him daily to inquire about his activities. However, in essence, a mama's boy is driven by a need for self-worth.

You are 28 years old, and your mother is approaching retirement age. Given the lack of demands on her time during the day, she is motivated to identify an activity that will provide a sense of purpose and value. She is not burdened by concerns related to the affairs of others or the demands of her professional life. Instead, her attention is largely focused on matters pertaining to her family. It is particularly beneficial for her to prioritize your well-being, given her perception of your inherent worthiness.

Consequently, her attention is concentrated on you.

A symbol of authority

It seems plausible to suggest that your mother has been accustomed to assuming responsibility for the care of others since you were a child. It may be the case that she perceives you as the child who has remained dependent on her throughout your life.

Furthermore, if one does not heed her requests, she will experience distress, which may lead her to perceive a lack of authority and value in one's eyes.

The subject displays symptoms of separation anxiety.

Separation anxiety is defined as an extreme fear of separation, manifested by a strong reaction to the mere idea of being left alone. It often manifests as repeated requests from the individual experiencing this anxiety for the other party to promise that they will not abandon them.

A defining trait of a mommy's boy is separation anxiety, which can be understood as a lack of security. This is because, during their formative years, children require preparation for separation from their primary caregivers. However, in this case, the mother's actions indicate a reluctance to facilitate this transition, potentially due to her belief that the child could not survive without her.

At a fundamental level, she is concerned that if you were to truly leave her care, she would not only lose her value but also her support. She consistently believes that you cannot live without her, yet in reality, it is she who is unable to live without you and who depends on you.

Given her perception of your importance, she experiences feelings of insecurity.

2. Personality

From the aforementioned situation, it can be inferred that the subject's mother exhibits characteristics of enthusiasm, curiosity, intervention, and persistence, while also demonstrating a tendency to prioritize meticulous attention to detail. It can be postulated that the subject's mother displays a personality type that is characterized by a certain degree of levity and a strong inclination towards asserting control.

Individuals with a happy-go-lucky personality tend to exhibit the following characteristics:

The subject displays a proclivity for broad interests, a penchant for verbal communication, and a disposition that is warm and enthusiastic. Additionally, they evince a proclivity for enjoying life.

The subject displays the following strengths: an optimistic and lively disposition, an ability to seize the present, compassion, and a talent for forming friendships.

The disadvantages of this personality type include impulsivity, lack of commitment, superficiality, vulnerability, and a tendency to experience remorse.

Those who seek to exert control over others desire respect, active listening, and the cessation of opposing views. Otherwise, they may become irritable.

3. Lack of clarity regarding boundaries

In recent times, I have been seeking employment following my departure from my previous position. My mother inquires daily as to whether I have secured a position. Despite my absence from the family home, I perceive her actions as a means of maintaining my proximity to her, thereby denying me the autonomy I require.

Following your departure from your previous position, your mother persistently inquired about your professional activities on a daily basis. This behavior resulted in a sense of being constrained and deprived of personal space. Your perception of her actions aligns with the reality that your mother has encroached upon your personal boundaries.

Mothers frequently lack knowledge regarding interpersonal boundaries. They tend to believe that their children will always view them as their primary source of care and attention.

The purpose of interpersonal boundaries is to illustrate that individuals are not inherently connected to one another, and that each possesses unique self-boundaries. These boundaries serve to delineate the rights and responsibilities of each individual.

Interpersonal boundaries and self-boundaries serve as protective barriers.

The source of your distress is your mother's excessive concern and questioning, her tendency to treat your responsibilities as her own, her inclination to save others from their own difficulties, and her willingness to transgress interpersonal boundaries.

2. You

He now experiences a headache whenever he sees her phone number and is reluctant to engage in any further communication.

1. You have a profound and abiding love for your mother.

Despite your assertion that you are annoyed by your mother's approach and believe she is meddling excessively and treating you as an adult without sufficient personal space, your colleagues perceive that you occasionally find it agreeable. Your reticence to offer suggestions may be interpreted as an affirmation of your mother's actions and a demonstration of your reliance on her guidance.

You have a strong bond with your mother and are reluctant to disobey her or express your own opinions.

2. Personality

From the information provided in the introduction, it can be inferred that the subject is a thoughtful, filial, obedient, and introverted young man who is unlikely to express his personal opinions. Based on these characteristics, it can be hypothesized that the subject exhibits a melancholic personality type and is inclined to please others.

The following characteristics are indicative of a person with a melancholic personality:

Characteristics: thoughtful, highly sensitive, idealistic, and in pursuit of truth, goodness, and beauty.

The individual in question displays a number of advantageous characteristics, including sensitivity, loyalty, talent, and insight.

The disadvantages of this personality type include a tendency toward stubbornness, indecision, self-centeredness, pessimism, and passivity.

A pleasing personality is one that is characterized by a tendency to seek to please others without regard for one's own feelings. This state of mind is considered unhealthy. The essence of pleasing others is that the individual's own needs and feelings are secondary to the needs and feelings of others. The individual's sense of safety and love is contingent upon their ability to make others feel comfortable.

3. Absence of a sense of boundaries

Previously, you would consistently adhere to your mother's guidance, seek her counsel, and even permit her to make decisions on your behalf to fulfill her desires. It was only when confronted with significant pressure that you perceived your self-boundaries to be transgressed and recognized the necessity for a degree of autonomy to nurture your self-esteem and manage your emotional states.

The notion that disclosing one's circumstances to one's mother would be disadvantageous has led to a lack of boundaries, which has in turn resulted in the mother's over-involvement.

The term "self-boundaries" refers to the rules, regulations, or limits that individuals establish to differentiate between reasonable and safe conduct, acceptable treatment of oneself by others, and appropriate responses when these boundaries are transgressed.

3. Distinguish between subject and object

What methods might be employed to liberate oneself from this control and cease acting like a mama's boy?

1. Establish a sense of boundaries.

The crux of the problem is that you have historically exhibited a tendency to rely excessively on your mother. This, coupled with a lack of clarity regarding interpersonal boundaries and an awareness of your own limitations, has led to the perception that you are unable to function independently without her. Consequently, she has accorded undue attention to your daily activities and professional endeavors.

The objective is to extricate oneself from the control exerted by one's mother and to establish appropriate interpersonal boundaries.

The process of subject-object separation is a psychological method of breaking free from the psychological dependence between the subject and the object.

The separation of the subject and the object represents a psychological method of liberating oneself from the psychological dependence between the subject (you) and the object (your mother). It is essential to learn to exercise your own rights and opinions independently while also considering the opinions of others as a reference point.

It is essential to gain an understanding of one's own boundaries.

The concept of self-boundaries pertains to the delineation of one's autonomy, encompassing the ability to choose, accept, and pursue one's own desires, as well as the capacity to decline, reject, and refrain from acting upon external influences.

It is essential to define the boundaries.

It is recommended that you communicate with your mother and clearly delineate the boundaries that exist between you in regard to time, space, responsibilities, and power. It is hoped that she will value and respect your feelings and provide you with the opportunity to grow.

2. Express gratitude to your mother.

While asserting your rights in relation to your mother, it is important to communicate that you are an adult and require autonomy in managing your own affairs. This does not imply a lack of need for her or a reduction in your appreciation for her. Instead, express gratitude for her past assistance, encouragement, and support, which have contributed to your current sense of pride and confidence.

It is believed that with the continued support of one's mother, one can learn to let go and allow oneself the time and space to be oneself.

3. Authenticity is of the utmost importance.

It is imperative to gain an understanding of one's own self.

It is important to understand one's strengths and focus on the tasks that one is adept at. It is unproductive to concern oneself with the opinions of others or to engage in comparisons.

One should refrain from imposing constraints on oneself, permit one's thoughts to meander freely, and engage in uninhibited thinking.

It is imperative to have confidence in oneself.

It is imperative to recognize that regardless of external influences, one must maintain an internal sense of self-assurance and belief in one's capabilities. This entails not only striving to enhance one's abilities and self-confidence but also reducing stress and embracing a sense of ease in one's endeavors.

It is important to accept oneself.

Even if one's actions deviate from the norm, it is important to learn to accept the mistakes one makes from time to time. Life requires one to pay tuition fees, provided that one ensures timely correction.

It is recommended that you adopt a relaxed attitude.

It is essential to respect the feelings of others and to develop the capacity to empathize with them. At the same time, it is crucial to respect one's own feelings and to advocate for one's rights. In the context of interpersonal relationships, sincerity and open-mindedness are vital, as is the ability to form genuine connections.

One can only truly break free from one's mother's control and become oneself, and cease to be a mama's boy in one's own mind, if one learns to be oneself and courageously expresses to one's mother one's need to mature and one's need for clearly defined boundaries, and if one can separate the subject of boundaries from the object.

Ultimately, I extend my best wishes to the original poster for a happy outcome.

Hello!

You're 28, but your mom still acts like a child and wants to control everything. I get why you feel so depressed and trapped.

1. Try to put yourself in your mother's shoes and be more understanding and tolerant.

Ultimately, your mother's actions are driven by her love and concern for you. While this approach may feel restrictive and inappropriate, it's important to remember that everyone is a child in front of their mother, and her actions may be a natural expression of simple emotions.

Maybe your mom is just used to paying attention to and loving you from childhood to adulthood over the years, and it's become a habit.

Mothers may not realize that love for their children eventually leads to separation. Without being mentally prepared, they may find it difficult to accept that their children are growing up and leaving them. They may want to have more contact with their children, which may be related to the education and concepts of the era in which they grew up. Try to understand and be more tolerant of them from their perspective.

2. Show your mother with facts that you're an adult and can handle your own affairs.

Your mother is still controlling you like a child because she sees you as one. There may also be some things in reality that make her feel uneasy. If you can show your mother that you can handle your own problems, for example, that you can be financially independent and not rely on your parents, she'll probably feel better.

It's important to communicate with your mother calmly. On the one hand, show her that you can manage your emotions and communicate with others rationally and calmly. On the other hand, explain some of the principles and reasons behind your actions so she can appreciate that you've grown up and can handle reality. This will help her feel more at ease and gradually let go.

3. Help your mother find ways to enrich her own life and maintain reasonable boundaries.

It's possible that your mother has always lived her life with you at the center. You need to shift your mindset. This habit can gradually help your mother develop her own interests and hobbies, build her own social circle, and enrich her life, which can effectively reduce her excessive attention to you.

You can talk to your mother about your feelings and explain that having reasonable boundaries is a way of showing respect.

I hope Hongyu's reply helps you out. Thanks for your question.

The questioner is away from home looking for work opportunities, and you have worked hard! I think Lin'er would agree with me if she were here.

It's natural for a mother to worry about her child even when they're far away. It's understandable that your mother would like to have a daily phone call. I'm not sure if you're an only child, but if you are, this is a common situation. It's also worth noting that 28-year-olds, and even many post-80s, are already over 40, yet their parents can still be quite controlling.

Your mother's acceptance of the fact that you are living on your own actually allows you a certain degree of freedom.

In the text, you don't mention your father. Is it possible that he is choosing to completely let go of you while you're away? It seems that your mother is currently quite anxious, and her reasons for this are as follows:

1. It seems that she may have lost her sense of purpose and direction in life. You don't live with her, and she is retired (you are 28 years old, and generally speaking, your mother is of retirement age?).

It would be beneficial to communicate with her more and call her proactively to help relieve her anxiety and uneasiness.

2. It seems that your mother is used to feeling secure when she takes care of you. Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether she has taken care of your daily life since you were little.

She is used to taking care of your life in many ways, even the smallest details. Now that you are no longer around, she is still trying to be involved in your life, even though you would prefer otherwise.

It is understandable that this feeling of being controlled is not pleasant. A 28-year-old adult is already an independent individual who needs to live according to their own independent will. However, your mother still seems reluctant to cut the "spiritual umbilical cord" and let go, which might be preventing you from handling your own life and working on your own.

3. She is understandably concerned about your current situation and is hesitant to leave you alone. While you are actively seeking employment, it would be helpful to understand whether you are still receiving an income.

If you are currently without income, would your mother be willing to provide support? If so, it is important to recognize that achieving independence in spirit and material terms are intertwined. The economic foundation plays a significant role in determining one's overall well-being.

Your mother is understandably concerned about your situation, particularly given the challenges of finding suitable employment at this stage. It might be helpful to consider ways to enhance your living situation, as this could potentially alleviate her concerns.

It might help to try to improve your own living situation, as this could help to ease her concerns.

4. It might be helpful to consider that your mother may also have some controlling tendencies. We will explore this further later on.

It would be helpful to understand whether your mother has always been quite hands-on, or if you only feel that she is controlling you now. Different situations require different approaches.

If you've only recently come to feel that your mother is exerting control over you, it's understandable. Given the difficulties of finding suitable employment in the current climate and your search for job opportunities, it's also understandable that she'd call daily to inquire about your situation.

It might be helpful to try to understand her and accept her care and love for you. I'm hopeful that she will feel less anxious once you do.

If your mother has been controlling you for a long time, you might consider taking practical steps to gradually gain more independence. You could try the following methods:

1. It might be helpful to address your career anxiety directly, acknowledging your feelings along the way.

Given that you are currently taking a career break, it is understandable that you, as a young adult of marriageable age, might experience some career anxiety.

It's possible that the source of this anxiety is either internal or external. It seems that you may have felt pressure from your mother recently. Could it be because you're reluctant to take responsibility for your own negative emotions and instead blame your caring mother? People are often quick to attribute setbacks to the people closest to them.

It seems that your mother has become the closest relative you could directly blame.

2. Consider taking ownership of your emotions and acting in a more assertive manner. As you pursue personal independence, it may be helpful to take ownership of your emotions, engage in some deep self-reflection, identify the underlying cause, and act in a more confident and decisive manner.

It might be helpful to write down your current situation. Writing down your thoughts can often provide clarity and help you find a way forward.

If I could make one more suggestion, it would be to get a pen and paper as soon as possible, stop complaining, and take action to find a job soon. I'm not sure what your education level is, but I'm sure you have plenty of skills that would be valuable in the job market.

If I may enquire, what is your profession? You might find it helpful to speak with a career planner to gain further insight into the situation.

3. It may be helpful to define your psychological boundaries and maintain an appropriate distance from your mother. There are four steps to drawing a clear psychological boundary with your mother: awareness, reflection, rejection, and expression.

I believe the first step is to become aware. From your description, it seems that your mother may be symbiotic and controlling.

Secondly, it would be beneficial to take some time to reflect on how your mother's actions have affected you.

From your description, it seems that your mother calls and asks you every day, which has led you to worry about becoming a "mama's boy" in people's eyes. People who are overly reliant on their mothers may lack courage and determination to face life's challenges on their own. Have you ever felt this way?

Step 3: It may be helpful to set a clear boundary and defend your position.

If you feel anxious when your mother calls, you might consider not answering her call and sending her a short message via WeChat/SMS instead. The final step is to express yourself.

We can express ourselves in a way that is gentle but firm. A gentle but firm refusal is a powerful way to make a point.

You might consider telling your mother that you are an adult capable of taking care of yourself. This could help to reassure her. You could also explain that her calls cause confusion and disturbance, and politely ask her to respect your personal space. Speaking nicely and using gentle but firm language could also help to ease her anxiety.

I hope this will be helpful for you. It's important to face the problem head-on, acknowledge it, and take responsibility for it. You are a man, and you can handle this.

I hope this will be helpful for you. It's important to face the problem head-on, take responsibility, and be brave. You can do it!

I wish you the best and hope that you will soon become financially and mentally independent. If you would like to discuss this further, please feel free to write to Lin'er, and I will provide you with some advice to help you feel better.

To those who seek to distance themselves from the concept of maternal love, In the context of our mothers' world, each of us is regarded as a precious entity. From their perspective, we are perpetual children, exhibiting a certain level of mischievousness. The depth of maternal love often surpasses our comprehension, rendering it challenging to articulate the extent of care and affection it bestows upon us.

It is imperative that you refrain from taking your mother's incessant admonishments personally and instead demonstrate patience and a willingness to engage in constructive dialogue.

It is imperative to learn how to reach a consensus when one desires to disengage.

It is important to learn to calm down and to gain an understanding of the nature of a mother's love.

In the event of an occurrence, it is advisable to maintain composure and address any concerns in a constructive manner.

Your mother has not yet become accustomed to relinquishing control and allowing you the freedom to pursue your own interests and aspirations.

It is accurate to conclude that you have matured, developed your own personal boundaries, thoughts, and autonomy, and established your own private space.

It would be beneficial for you to engage in a candid discussion with your mother, extend yourself the opportunity to flourish independently, and cultivate the ability to soar on your own wings. While it may be challenging to alter long-established patterns after an extended period, it is crucial to recognize that our parents are the primary sources of our love and support. When you eventually embark on your own journey, you will undoubtedly hold them in high regard as the foundation upon which you stand. This is a sentiment that holds immense significance in their hearts.

Your mother's affection for you stems from her desire to shield you from suffering and exhaustion. She endures the vicissitudes of life for your sake alone. It is possible that she truly comprehends this, yet she is still compelled to act in this manner. You occupy a unique position in her life; it is unlikely that anyone else could assume that role.

If you and your mother share a similar interest, you may utilize this avenue to gradually influence her perspective. You have already reached an age of autonomy, and your mother's input may no longer be as crucial to your development. It is, therefore, advisable to pursue your own path.