It doesn't feel good, but I dare not contradict. What if I'm hurt by a good friend?

Hello, question asker. I can see that you're feeling confused, and I'm here to support you.

I believe what you are experiencing now are some interpersonal problems. Please allow me to give you a warm hug again if you'd like.

Could I ask why you are afraid to argue with your best friend when she posts your photo in a group chat?

Perhaps it's because you've been in a similar situation before?

Perhaps you expressed your feelings to a close friend who may have hurt you, and you got some bad experiences in return.

As a result, even when someone hurts you, you may be hesitant to express your true thoughts.

Could it be that you're concerned your past experiences might resurface?

Perhaps this is just your idea.

It is often the case that the truth is not as bad as we think.

I encourage you to take that first step and express your thoughts in a brave and constructive manner. You may find that the outcome is different than you expect.

It's possible that a good friend like the one you mentioned above may not have a strong sense of boundaries. They might think that you won't mind if they post your photo in a group chat.

But you do care, in fact.

At this juncture, it would be advisable to speak up.

Even if she is a good friend, she may not be aware of your feelings, so it's important to communicate if you feel you've done something wrong.

If you feel more comfortable expressing yourself in writing, you can also write her a letter.

As a suggestion, if you have her WeChat contact information, you might consider sending her a message in her private WeChat message.

If you're not ready to talk about it, but feel uneasy holding it in, you might consider using the "empty chair technique."

One possible approach is the "empty chair technique," which involves sitting in a chair and imagining your best friend sitting in an empty chair. This can be a helpful way to express your thoughts and feelings in a safe and non-confrontational manner.

If you're unsure how to use the "empty chair technique," it might be helpful to speak with a professional counselor.

I truly hope that the issue you're facing can be resolved in a satisfactory manner as soon as possible.

I believe I may now be able to consider these things in a different way.

I hope my above answers are helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner. I am the answerer, and I am grateful for the opportunity to learn from your questions every day.

Here at Yixinli, we extend our warmest regards to the world and to you.

Dear Question Asker,

It is possible that a sensitive and delicate individual may experience slight discomfort as a result of an unintentional action carried out by a friend with a larger physique. It would be beneficial to ascertain whether the two individuals in question have a strong familiarity with one another and whether they adhere to the same social norms. If the friend in question is relatively new, it would be advisable to inform him privately that you do not particularly enjoy having unrelated circles view the photographs of friends in other circles and pass judgment upon them.

If your friend is able to accept your decision without reservation, then the matter is concluded. However, if he expresses disagreement and perceives your actions as a significant issue, it may be advisable to limit future interactions and refrain from sharing personal photographs with him. Additionally, if the images you send to this individual are unfamiliar or unknown to him, it is essential to reflect on the rationale behind sharing such content.

As the adage states, one can only become acquainted with one's neighbors by erecting a fence around one's property. There is no inherent problem with explicitly articulating one's stance and conveying one's perspectives in a gentle yet resolute manner. However, it is essential to possess the courage to do so.

[It is imperative to pay close attention to one's inner self.]

The questioner indicated that he is not inclined to share details of his personal life, which suggests that he possesses a stable sense of self-worth and is not motivated to constantly disseminate updates to his social circle for the purpose of attracting attention. This is a relatively uncommon disposition. How did you manage to achieve this?

For someone like me, who is inclined to self-promotion, it is challenging to refrain from doing so. This illustrates the diversity of human nature. Some individuals are driven to seek attention, while others are capable of focusing on their own needs and accepting themselves.

I am a psychological counselor, Zhang Huili. It is my hope that my words will provide you with some measure of comfort. Should you find them to be of use, I would be grateful if you would click the "like" button and leave a comment.

Given that this is a group chat, it is inevitable that many of them are entertaining and provocative. It is possible that the photos you shared were seen by a friend who then proceeded to share them with the entire group, with the intention of initiating conversation. This can be perceived as a reuse of resources.

It is also possible that the other person did not request the photo and chose to disseminate it in the group. They may have assumed that the group chat is a public forum where all content is visible to all members, without considering whether you would prefer to limit the audience. Even in a group chat with known members, there may be individuals with whom you are not particularly acquainted, given the varying degrees of closeness within the group.

It is important to distinguish between friends and acquaintances. It is advisable to refrain from sharing such images with friends with whom one is not well-acquainted. The act of sharing the image directly without consideration for one's feelings has caused discomfort. Furthermore, if the image is shared in a group chat, it will become public knowledge. What was originally a private matter has now become known to everyone.

It is an unfortunate and embarrassing situation. One option is to temporarily refrain from discussing the matter, as doing so may lead to concerns about appearing overly calculating. However, if the topic is not addressed immediately, it will inevitably arise at a later point in time. This implies that if I share this photograph with you, it is imperative that you do not disseminate it to others or include it in group chats without careful consideration.

Group chats are more open in nature. It is, of course, possible to avoid any potential issues by simply not sharing any photos in the first place. This approach will effectively eliminate any potential problems. By addressing the source of the issue, the problem-solving process can be made more efficient.

As we are all friends, it is entirely appropriate to share some photos and information.

This is a critical decision that must be made regarding the use of group chats. If one's personality is not inclined towards excessive outgoingness and the sharing of personal information, it is advisable to limit one's participation in such interactions. This may help to alleviate some of the discomfort, sadness, and fear of being perceived as calculating that you currently experience.

From this, it can be surmised that your emotional state is particularly susceptible to external influences, rendering you sensitive to social situations. Consequently, it would be prudent to exercise caution in future, reducing the flattery and paying closer attention to your inner feelings. Anticipating potential outcomes and considering their implications before acting would also be beneficial.

The act of posting a photograph may precipitate a chain reaction in the subject, even if the individual is explicitly instructed not to disseminate it in a group setting. It is inherently challenging to exert control over the actions of a particular individual, given their autonomy in determining their own course of action. Consequently, at the outset, it is crucial to assess the potential benefits and risks of sharing the photograph in question. If the potential for distress is identified, it may be advisable to seek psychological counseling to address the concerns.

Please clarify.

Good day. I am a Heart Exploration coach. I can see that you and a few friends have a group chat and you are all very close. You and one of them had a private chat about the content of some photos, but he posted them in the group. However, you don't want others to see them because they are photos of some of your other friends.

You are concerned about the discussion in their group about the photo, but you are hesitant to refute it. You are currently experiencing negative emotions but are reluctant to disclose this to your colleagues. You are not inclined to share personal details and avoid posting to your Moments. You typically share photos taken with the other person and do not send photos to friends in different circles. You are disappointed when faced with such situations but are unsure of how to address them. Additionally, you do not perceive it as a significant issue and believe discussing it would be perceived as trivial.

I observe that you experience significant internal conflicts and contradictions. The first conflict is that you do not wish to share the photos with your circle of friends because you do not want to be commented on by irrelevant individuals. However, you privately share the photos with friends who are in the photos, which indicates that you want to share. You seek to establish emotional connections with others but are afraid of being hurt.

The second conflict is that you shared a photo without your permission or consultation, and your friend decided to share it in a group where it was commented on freely by others. You feel embarrassed, violated, and hurt, and you are angry. You are dissatisfied with the other person's actions, but you are reluctant to express your dissatisfaction because you do not want to be criticized for being petty. Therefore, you choose to endure it, which makes you very uncomfortable. You can only rationalize the other person's behavior and say that it is not a big deal in order to make yourself feel less uncomfortable.

The discord between your two personalities is causing you distress.

How might the pain be resolved?

It is evident that you have a clear understanding of the actions of the other party and your own subsequent response. However, your primary concern appears to be whether you are reluctant to express yourself or fearful of being hurt by others, or potentially both.

Your distress stems from the discord between your id and superego. You lack the fortitude to reconcile these two aspects.

In the world of adults, every choice has a corresponding price to pay.

As an illustration, if you share a photo privately and anticipate that the other person will not post it, you can explain this to them in advance. However, you cannot guarantee that they will adhere to this agreement, so there is a possibility of exposure when sharing.

For example, if you feel embarrassed when your colleague shares a photo and you choose to endure it, you will have to bear the consequences of others not knowing your discomfort and the pain caused by their actions. If you choose to communicate with the other person and express your dissatisfaction with their actions, you may face the possibility of others saying that you are too calculating and care too much about insignificant details. You may feel bad about yourself and that you are not lovable, and bear the consequences of this discomfort.

Given that every choice entails a degree of risk, the questioner has the option of selecting the course of action that they are willing to act on, accepting the consequences of exercising patience, or facing the potential challenge of being perceived as unkind (although it is important to note that such accusations may not be entirely accurate).

I suggest the questioner read the book The Courage to Be Disliked. I hope it will be of benefit to you and provide inspiration. If you require further communication, the questioner can click below to find a coach to interpret, choose a heart exploration to chat with, and communicate with me one-on-one.

I hope you are able to resolve your issues promptly and wish you the best of luck.

Hello, questioner! You asked, "I've been hurt by a friend. What should I do?"

"I appreciate that you're aware of your feelings and thinking about this. Awareness and thinking help us grow. They help us understand ourselves and others better, be more sensitive to their needs, and be more comfortable in relationships.

Let's look at your question.

You and a few friends have a group chat. You and one of your friends exchanged some photos, but he posted them to the group chat. You don't want other people to see them because they are photos of some of your other friends.

You feel bad when the group discusses the photo, but you don't say anything.

You don't like sharing your life or posting to your friends' walls. You usually post photos of yourself with others.

You don't send photos to friends in different circles, so you feel sad when faced with such a thing, but you don't know how to solve it.

Let's look at the incident from the perspective of the theory of the layers of consciousness.

Sigmund Freud, the famous psychoanalyst, proposed the theory of human consciousness levels. According to this theory, there are three levels of consciousness: conscious, pre-conscious, and subconscious. The conscious level is the thoughts and emotions that the brain can normally perceive. The pre-conscious level is the part of the mind that is temporarily in a state of oblivion but can be remembered after recall. The subconscious level is the deepest part of the mind and has the greatest influence on a person's emotions and behaviors.

Human consciousness is like an iceberg. The tip above the water is conscious. The part below the water is pre-conscious. The widest part is subconscious. From the perspective of the theory of consciousness levels, the incident you encountered may seem to you on the conscious level. Your friend shared the photos you had shared privately with him. Everyone started discussing it. It seems like no big deal.

The people he sent the message to are people you know and have a good relationship with. Our consciousness is more constrained by morality.

You may feel your privacy has been exposed and become the talk of the town. You may be afraid to defend your rights and interests, which may offend a group of people. This is what many call "the law does not hold the crowd accountable."

Your feelings and opinions about this matter conflict, so you feel very difficult.

You can choose to protect your rights and interests.

We have analyzed the reasons for your internal conflict. You decide whether to safeguard your rights and how to do so. You haven't spoken up because you don't want to offend the person you have a good relationship with or your friends.

As the saying goes, "Where there are people, there are rivers and lakes; where there are rivers and lakes, there is a boss." You have a choice. It just depends on whether you dare to do it and how you do it.

You can talk to your friend and tell him how you feel. You can make it clear that you only shared those photos with him because you trusted him. You don't want those photos to be shared in the group. Only when you express your needs will others know what you care about.

What don't you care about? Otherwise, you may feel others are testing your boundaries.

You can also say this in the group, but you may face more pressure and more change.

Read How You Are Treated by Others is How You Teach Them by Huang Qituan.

People's relationships change a lot. At first, people get to know each other. Then they become familiar and friends. Finally, the relationship reaches a balance.

If you feel hurt often when you're with friends, you need to break the pattern and start over.

Read this book to reduce stress and anxiety.

Best wishes to the questioner! I hope my answer helps.

Hello, I'm Strawberry.

I can see the questioner's feelings and concerns. Let me be clear: friends fear most when the other person acts in such a self-righteous manner. If it's not low emotional intelligence, then it's deliberate.

The questioner chose to chat with the other person in private and only sent the photo to him. Anyone with a modicum of intelligence would know what the questioner meant. Sending the photo to the group so casually and starting a discussion about it shows a lack of respect for the questioner and no consideration for the questioner.

It is important to establish clear boundaries between friends.

The questioner gets along well with a few friends and is a friendly person, so it's clear he has a lot of friends for socializing. In addition to these friends who know each other, the questioner also has other friends.

When the questioner sent a photo of him with another friend to a friend, that friend reposted the photo to the group and discussed and commented on it with the other people in the group, which made the questioner feel very uncomfortable. The questioner did not dare argue back.

If you're unhappy but don't express it, it's clear you've hidden your emotions before. Your relationship with these friends isn't as good as you say.

Friends respect each other. The photo was not posted by the original poster in the group, and the original poster did not ask for opinions. When this friend reposted the photo in the group, the other friends should have known better than to discuss it.

Express when you should.

After spending a long time with the questioner, you know their character and habits. You should have informed the questioner before forwarding the photo to the group. The questioner was upset, which shows that the other person's actions have touched the questioner's bottom line. At that time, the questioner could still express their emotions.

The friend you've been chatting with probably has a lower emotional quotient and didn't consider the feelings of the questioner. We can only express ourselves once, and the other person will not make the same mistake next time. So, tell the friend you've been chatting with that if they want to post in the group, they can do so at that time. There's no need to post privately. Add an emoticon with a face covered in a mask to show the other person you're unhappy and helpless about their behavior. Don't be angry.

A true friendship doesn't require us to compromise ourselves to accommodate others. If this is the case all the time, the questioner should take a good look at their attitude and decide if it's something they want to keep up in these relationships.

There's more to it than self-doubt.

The questioner is afraid to argue or express his feelings when his friend's behavior upsets him. After thinking about it, he even wonders if he is being petty. This is not the way to maintain a true friendship. Self-doubt reveals one's lack of confidence, and it does not lead to true friendship.

The first reason for sending a photo to a friend in private is that the poster wants to share it with the other person and trusts them. The photo belongs to the poster, so the friend should consult with the poster before reposting it—it's a simple matter of respect.

The other person's behavior is not the main reason why the questioner feels sad. The other person has let the questioner down and betrayed the questioner's trust. This trivial matter reveals the true character of this friend.

When we care about something, we always pay attention to different points. We must see our emotions from the matter itself, not try to ignore them. The book "Habitual Avoidance" is recommended to the questioner. When we are afraid of conflicts in interpersonal relationships, we cannot avoid them. We must face our emotions, see them, accept them, and relieve them to solve problems and let negative emotions truly disappear.

I am confident that my answer will be helpful to the original poster.

Dear questioner,

From your words, I can see that you have been hurt by your friend's actions, which may have been well-intentioned, but which you now feel have caused you discomfort. You have come here to ask a question, perhaps to gain some insight or perspective on how to move forward.

You mentioned that you prefer not to share your personal life with others and that you don't often post on social media. Even when you do share something, it's usually a photo with someone else. It seems like you have your own standards and rules when it comes to getting along with others and you have a stronger sense of boundaries than other friends. However, your rules have been broken, which has made you feel uncomfortable. The challenging part is that the person who broke your rules is a friend you have a good relationship with.

If I might venture a guess, you mentioned that you're hesitant to engage in arguments. Are you concerned about potential disagreements with others, particularly those in your inner circle? Do you worry about being evaluated negatively by others? People who don't readily share their lives or friends from different social groups tend to avoid such interactions. Does this approach make you feel secure?

Everyone's criteria for making friends and doing things are based on their own unique life experiences and living environments. These have been summed up and adapted accordingly. It's important to choose the one that suits you best right now. There is no right or wrong. I believe that you can become good friends with someone if they have a quality that you like about them. They must also be a kind person who cares about others. So why not give it a try? Simply tell the other person what you think. This way, they will know that you don't like it when they do that.

I understand that it can be challenging to express your true feelings, especially when you're worried that the other person might perceive you as calculating. It's understandable that you might not want to be seen in that way, even if you don't see yourself that way. It might be helpful to explore the underlying reasons behind this feeling to gain a better understanding.

If you're still unable to confide in someone about your discomfort, we can explore other avenues to help you feel less anxious. The 1mind platform offers a wealth of resources, including Meditation Planet, book clubs, communities, and instant counseling. These provide a safe space to express your depression, adjust your state of mind, and find inner peace.

It might also be helpful to consider the resources that are available to you in your immediate circle, such as parents, loved ones, and close friends (anyone you can trust). You might find it beneficial to confide in them about your difficulties, and it's possible that a simple act of kindness, like sharing a meal, a drink, or a cup of tea, could help you feel better. When you're ready, you might want to explore the possibility of forming a new connection with someone who can offer you a different perspective.

I hope these thoughts can help ease your confusion. You are not alone on the road ahead.

Hello, questioner!

It's tough to give advice on emotional problems after being offended by a friend in just a few words. Even so, I hope we can chat more and see other ways of looking at this.

Treat others with respect to live comfortably.

You said at the end of the article that you didn't think it was a big deal and didn't want to seem petty. But something that can keep you up at night and make you get up at two or three in the morning to ask a question online must be very important to you. It seems like a friend of yours just reposted a photo that you had sent to him privately to a group chat that you both were in. This action may not seem like a big deal to the other person or even to the friends in the other group.

However, the hurt, grievance, anger, sadness, etc., that you feel as a result are all real emotions that need to be seen and cared for. Only by respecting your own feelings and dealing with your emotions can you sleep peacefully, live comfortably, and live freely.

It's important to speak up for your own boundaries.

Everyone's different. Some people like to share, while you "aren't the kind of person who likes to share their life," and "I won't send photos to friends in different circles." It's your choice, and it's also a boundary you need to protect.

If you haven't mentioned it before and a friend has accidentally crossed a line because they didn't know, you can choose to forgive them, but you should take this opportunity to tell them, "I don't like it when you do that, it makes me feel uncomfortable, and I hope you can respect my feelings." If you have spoken up for your boundaries, then true friends are the ones who respect your feelings.

Keep an eye on how you act day to day.

In this photo incident, you chose to swallow your anger and suppress your emotions. Maybe in your daily life, there are other things you respond to in a similar way. When you do this, you can become aware of what you are worried about and why you cannot argue back or be honest.

Do you sometimes worry that you're putting yourself in an unequal position in relationships? From what you've told me, it seems like you have a wide range of relationships, with friends in different circles, and quite a few people in each circle. It's great that everyone has a good relationship with you!

You have your own unique charm, which is why you attract so many friends. And being confident in setting your own boundaries is also a great personal quality.

I hope the person who asked the question is happy and at ease with their friends!

Good day, My name is Jiang 61.

Firstly, I would like to thank you for placing your trust in us and for sharing your concerns with us so that we can assist you. You have stated that you are concerned about being hurt by a good friend.

"Let me offer you a hug to comfort you. Let's discuss the next steps."

1. Boundaries and Personality

1. Boundaries

You stated that a few of your friends have a group chat together and that you are all very close. You further stated that you had a private chat with one of them about some photos, but that he posted them to the group anyway, which you did not want because they were photos of some of your other friends.

WeChat groups

You maintain separate WeChat groups for different friends, and you tailor your communications accordingly. You also have a few close friends with whom you feel comfortable discussing personal matters.

Boundaries

From your account, it is evident that you maintain clear boundaries, discerning which matters are suitable for discussion within the circle of friends, which words are appropriate for the group, and which are for private chats. However, your friends lack such boundaries, resulting in the public dissemination of private chats and photos.

Furthermore, this can result in feelings of discontent.

2. Feelings

You indicate that you experience negative emotions when the topic of discussion turns to photos in the group. You express a reluctance to refute these claims. Consequently, you feel uncomfortable but are hesitant to confess the truth to your friends.

The discussion is as follows:

You experience discomfort when your colleagues comment on the photos in the group. This is because the exchange is meant to be private between you and your colleagues, and you prefer not to have it made public. As a result, you feel a range of emotions.

I lack the courage to proceed.

In the context of discussions with colleagues, the phrase "dare not" indicates a reluctance to offend or alienate others, and a consequent inability to assert one's own position or attitude.

3. Personality

You indicate that you are not inclined to share personal details on social media and prefer to limit your posts to photos with other individuals. You also specify that you do not share photos with friends in different circles.

Please indicate your preference.

From your comments about not wanting to share your personal life, I understand that you are selective about your friends and also choose carefully who you share photos with and on which platforms.

Personality

Furthermore, your interpersonal style is characterized by a limited network of friends, a tendency to avoid self-promotion, a reserved demeanor, a reluctance to engage in direct conflict, and a high level of consideration for others' perspectives. Based on these observations, I conclude that your personality type is Compliant + Calm.

Compliant personality

A pleasing personality is one that blindly seeks to please others without regard for one's own feelings. This is an unhealthy state of mind. The essence of pleasing is that others are more important than I am. In this way, I am only safe and loved if I make others feel comfortable.

A calm personality is defined as follows: Characteristics: slow and deliberate, cautious, gentle and stable, and the pursuit of harmony.

Individuals with a calm personality tend to exhibit the following characteristics:

Characteristics: - Slow and deliberate - Cautious - Gentle and stable - Pursuit of harmony

Advantages: 1. Easy to get along with 2. Comfortable in any situation 3. Careful in thinking 4. Tolerant

The disadvantages of this personality type are that it may be slow and lazy, not easily repentant, not fond of expressing itself, and indifferent to bystanders.

2. The reasons for the emotional distress experienced

1. Lack of clarity regarding boundaries and position

There is a lack of clear delineation of boundaries.

It is evident that your friend has violated your privacy and crossed your boundaries by sharing the content of your more intimate conversations and group photos with others in the group for judgment. You could have addressed the situation in a timely manner, but you did not. Your intention was to preserve the relationship, but you did not maintain your boundaries, which caused you distress.

The position is unclear.

Failing to intervene when friends are discussing photos demonstrates a concern for their opinions and a fear of offending them, which hinders the expression of one's own views and positions.

2. Due to personality

As previously stated, your agreeable personality causes you to focus on how others will perceive you if you voice your thoughts, rather than on the hurt and discomfort they may cause when they judge you.

Furthermore, individuals with calm personalities are perceived as reliable partners, approachable, and accommodating. If one's attitude is not clearly communicated, others may overlook one's feelings due to their gentle, kind, and harmonious demeanor.

Therefore, the grievances and discomfort you feel are a result of your personality.

3. The influence of your family life

You are reluctant to express your opinions, which is likely a result of the dynamics within your family of origin.

Individuals who are not valued

You tend to keep to yourself, reluctant to speak up for yourself. You only engage in private conversations with a select few individuals, indicating a lack of trust in others. It is evident that you are not valued by those around you, and your communication style reflects this.

As a result, you have limited your social interactions to those with whom you have a positive rapport and consider them friends.

The atmosphere is characterized by a strong-willed approach.

Your sense of oppression also stems from the dominance of your parents in the family, which restricts your ability to speak and make decisions. You have long been unable to express your opinions freely, and when you do, you are often met with blame and criticism. Living in this kind of atmosphere makes you feel worthless, so you have developed the habit of acting according to your parents' wishes, which has led to a loss of your own identity.

This is also the reason for your feelings of suffocation and discomfort.

3. Recommendations

You inquire as to whether there is a solution to this situation and whether it is a significant issue, given that you perceive it to be a minor concern.

If you are seeking to resolve the current dilemma, we offer the following advice:

1. Establish clear boundaries.

The following section will address the topic of boundaries.

The concept of boundaries is fundamental to effective interpersonal communication.

Boundaries are the limits of responsibility and authority that an individual is aware of in interpersonal relationships. They protect personal space from being violated without violating the personal space of others.

There are various types of boundaries.

All relationships have boundaries, which can be divided into external and internal categories. External boundaries encompass physical boundaries and material boundaries, while internal boundaries include psychological boundaries and emotional boundaries.

Inner boundaries

Psychological and emotional boundaries. The former relate to thoughts, values, and beliefs, while the latter reflect sensitivity and understanding of inner feelings, such as the extent to which emotions from others affect you.

It is important to understand your own boundaries.

Knowing your own boundaries means understanding what is and is not acceptable in your external and internal environments. It also means being aware of your limitations in terms of what you can and cannot say or do.

It is important to set clear boundaries.

It is important to understand that your personal boundaries are only known to you. In order to ensure a productive and mutually beneficial relationship, it is essential to communicate these boundaries to those with whom you are in a professional or personal relationship.

2. Perfecting oneself

Individuals who attempt to please others often lack self-confidence, which hinders their ability to express opinions and advocate for themselves. To foster positive interpersonal relationships, it is essential to enhance one's personal capabilities.

It is important to establish your own identity and live independently from your family of origin.

Your original family has instilled a lack of self-awareness, indifference to self-awareness, and a narrow focus on the needs of others. It is now time to recognize that you have matured, are no longer constrained by your parents, and must chart your own course.

The objective is to establish self-awareness.

Self-awareness is defined as the subject's awareness of themselves. This encompasses awareness of one's own body and its state, awareness of the state of one's own limb movements, and awareness of one's own mental activities, including thinking, emotions, and will.

The establishment of self-awareness includes key components such as self-concept, self-perception, self-evaluation, self-experience, self-monitoring, and self-regulation and control.

and enhance your professional capabilities

When one's self-concept, self-awareness, self-evaluation, and self-regulation are not optimal, the initial focus is often on the feelings, evaluations, and emotions of others. It is essential to take a moment to reflect and assess when challenges arise.

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize one's own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

It is important to be aware of your emotional state, the source of your emotions, your feelings, your thoughts, and the underlying needs that drive your emotions.

It is important to satisfy your needs.

Identify the underlying needs that drive your emotions, determine how to fulfill them, and recognize the value you bring to the table.

And enhance your professional capabilities.

When you consistently enhance your sense of self-worth, capabilities, and sensitivity to your own needs through self-satisfaction, you will not only focus on the emotions, feelings, and thoughts of others, but also take into account your own emotions, feelings, and thoughts. You will improve negative emotions and incongruent interpersonal relationships, respond to relationships correctly, and improve yourself.

3. Express yourself

When conflicts arise in interpersonal relationships, it is important to communicate your thoughts in a clear and consistent manner.

The objective is consistent communication.

In consistent communication, the verbal and non-verbal information conveyed to the other person is aligned with one's inner feelings. This approach ensures that all parties involved, including oneself and the other person, as well as the situation, receive the attention and respect they deserve.

This model of human speech demonstrates an inner awareness, with expression and speech in alignment, inner harmony and balance, and a relatively high sense of self-worth.

The following sentence patterns are commonly used in consistent communication exercises and expressions. 1. When... Describe the objective situation without accusations or emotions.

The following sentence patterns are commonly used in consistent communication exercises and expressions. After a period of time, you can truly communicate in a consistent manner. The specific sentence patterns are as follows:

When...

Describe the situation in a factual manner, without making any accusations or expressing any emotions.

"My feeling is..."

It is important to clearly express your current feelings and emotions.

It is my hope that...

It is essential to clearly communicate your expectations and needs to the other party. These expectations should be quantifiable, enforceable, and visible.

It is my belief that...

Please describe your expectations regarding the positive outcome.

When communication is consistent and aligned with feelings, actions, and words, the other person receives a clear message. This reduces misunderstandings and maintains the strength of the friendship.

The questioner should prioritize establishing clear boundaries, followed by pursuing self-improvement and courageous expression. This will help to avoid being hurt by friends' inappropriate actions. It is important to be bold and be true to oneself.

I would like to extend my best wishes to the questioner for a happy life.