Long-distance relationships, unstable emotional connections, lead to severe somatization. What to do?

The symptoms you describe do seem to resemble the manifestations of separation anxiety, particularly the intense anxiety and somatic reactions caused by the sense of instability in an emotional relationship. Somatization is a process that converts psychological stress or conflict into physical symptoms, and anxiety disorders are a common mental health problem that can be managed and treated in a variety of ways.

While you have made some progress in gaining self-awareness and understanding, there may still be a gap between recognizing the problem and effectively addressing it. Here are a few suggestions for your consideration:

1. It might be helpful to seek a professional assessment.

You might consider seeking a professional assessment at a hospital psychiatric department. An experienced doctor could determine whether you have separation anxiety or another anxiety disorder based on your specific symptoms and circumstances, and provide treatment recommendations accordingly.

It is true that there are effective medications for anxiety disorders, but it is important to note that they need to be prescribed by a doctor.

2. Psychological counseling and therapy

Psychotherapy, especially cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), has been shown to be very effective in treating anxiety disorders. Through counseling, you can learn to identify and change the thought patterns that cause anxiety, as well as learn healthier coping strategies.

You might also consider emotion-focused therapy (EFT) or attachment-based therapy, which could be helpful in dealing with anxiety related to intimate relationships.

3. Self-management strategies

It might be helpful to try relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or mindfulness meditation. These can help relieve the physical symptoms of anxiety.

It may be helpful to consider that maintaining regular exercise, a healthy diet, and adequate sleep could also be beneficial for managing anxiety.

4. Consider ways to improve communication.

It may be helpful to communicate openly with your partner and share your feelings and experiences. You might find that establishing a mode of communication that is mutually supportive and understanding could help to alleviate your anxiety.

It may be helpful to consider establishing a support system.

It might be helpful to share your feelings with trusted family members and friends and to establish a support system that can provide additional emotional support when you feel anxious.

It is important to remember that while self-exploration is valuable, there are times when external help and intervention can be beneficial in effectively managing and resolving these issues. Seeking help is an important first step in resolving problems.

Good morning, I am ZQ, a heart exploration coach from the Yixinli platform. I am concerned to see that your current unstable relationship with your long-distance boyfriend has caused you to experience a serious somatic state. Generally speaking, a somatic state is closely related to some negative emotions.

For example, anxiety and unease. In a long-distance relationship, it is common for both parties to experience feelings of unease unless there is a high level of compatibility and the ability to respond to each other's needs in a timely manner. It is also important to recognise that everyone has their own lives.

When you are in a different location, it is even more challenging to support each other emotionally. It is also difficult to see and touch each other, and there is no way to provide a hug. Sometimes it is even difficult to respond in a timely manner, and sometimes there may be no response for three hours or even half a day.

This is a test of one's ability to adjust, despite a good understanding of the principles involved. However, these principles may not have been fully internalized, and there may be a lack of behavioral measures to support self-care. When feelings of unease and bodily discomfort arise,

Have you observed how a specific behavior manifests itself in you? When you don't know what he's doing and he doesn't reply to your messages, you suddenly feel palpitations and vomit. How long does this last? What is the reason for the cessation of somatization? The anxiety you once had about the college entrance exam may not have completely eliminated the shadow.

Your mind may still be preoccupied with exam-related concerns, which have the potential to spill over into your relationships. While you may understand that relationships are a natural aspect of life, you may still approach love with undue seriousness.

There is a distinction between conscious and subconscious processes. It is possible that there is a discrepancy between your conscious and subconscious minds. You may believe that you are indifferent to a particular matter, but your subconscious may indicate otherwise. If you experience a strong sense of unease and anxiety, it is advisable to seek a psychiatric evaluation at a hospital.

It is important to ascertain the facts of the situation. If the diagnosis is not serious, psychological counseling may be a viable option. It is advisable to prioritize your offline life, entertainment, and social activities in your daily life and work. Additionally, it is beneficial to utilize conventional psychological adjustment methods, such as confiding in friends, massage, or meditation, when experiencing anxiety or unease.

Please advise.

Hello.

Our bodies are more real and our physical reactions are more direct. When your relationship is unstable, you feel insecure.

Anxiety can cause physical symptoms like palpitations and vomiting.

This is a chain of cause and effect. If one link is broken, it can improve somatic symptoms.

If you think your relationship is stable or if you feel in control, you will feel less anxiety. If your anxiety is under control, you will feel less physically sick.

Anxiety disorders can be controlled with medication. You can go to a hospital for a diagnosis.

Take medication as your doctor says.

A relationship is a two-person thing. Even if you know it's stable, you'll still worry.

Everyone worries in a relationship, especially during the honeymoon period. Girls worry more than boys because their emotions are more complex.

You're nervous about him, you care about him, and you care about your relationship. Your emotions are genuine, so you're worried.

You know that relationships are just a part of life. Even if you break up, nothing will really change. It will be hard to let go. It shows that you care about your romantic life and are serious about your relationships.

In a relationship, we love and are loved. This is an important sense of belonging. Our emotions are a big part of our lives, even if we think they aren't.

Our bodies will show it, and we really do care.

Take care of your emotions, love others, and be open to love. Let your mind and body be in harmony. Don't let reason get in the way of your emotions. Speak up about what you need.

You can read about Satir family therapy, which involves a sculpting technique. One type of Satir family therapy is ultra-rational. This means the person is intelligent and wise but ignores themselves, suppresses themselves, isolates their emotions and feelings, and uses an ultra-rational and stereotypical concept to control themselves.

This can damage family relationships.

This is just a general overview. You can also contact a heart exploration coach for more in-depth discussions. I wish you a speedy recovery.

Love yourself as much as you love the world.

Hello! I'd like to give you a warm hug from afar first.

I'm glad you've reached out for help. I hope my input can support you and help you find a solution. I also want to commend you for recognizing the physical discomfort you feel when you're apart from your boyfriend and can't be sure what he's doing, especially when he doesn't respond to your messages in time.

You think your relationship is stable, and you can accept and face changes, even if it ends. But you've been apart from your boyfriend for a long time, and when he doesn't respond to your messages quickly, you feel anxious and uneasy. Your body reacts with symptoms like palpitations and vomiting.

It's worth noting that our experiences and feelings in intimate relationships after adulthood are often shaped by our early attachment to our mothers as infants. This could be a key factor in understanding the somatic symptoms you're experiencing.

It's important to be aware of what's behind the anxiety, physical symptoms like palpitations and vomiting, and the fear of being abandoned when your boyfriend doesn't reply to your messages in time. For example, you might need to feel loved, valued, cared for, understood, considerate, concerned, and accompanied, and you might also be afraid of being abandoned and unloved.

From what you've said, it seems like you have an anxious attachment style in your intimate relationships. You have a strong need for security, are afraid of being alone, and feel lonely and isolated. You want to be the most important person in the lives of the people you care about. You want to prove to yourself that you're valuable, important, and loved. Otherwise, you'll feel anxious, panicky, and uneasy, and you might even have physical symptoms.

If you know what your attachment type is in relationships and you're willing to change, you can learn to treat yourself the way you want to be treated. You can do this by using your awareness and by learning and growing on your own.

Take back that part of your expectations of your boyfriend to yourself. Don't assume that your boyfriend is responsible for responding to and satisfying this part of your missing and lacking needs. After all, your boyfriend is a separate individual from you, and no one but yourself can give you the companionship and support you expect all the time.

You can certainly tell him honestly about what's behind your anxious feelings when you're apart from your boyfriend for a long time, especially when he doesn't respond to your messages quickly. You can also express that you need him to be more accepting, understanding, and supportive.

It's possible to heal wounds you receive in a relationship. We look for intimacy in adulthood because we want to recapture the attachment to our mothers in our early years and feel completely accepted, understood, and loved.

Today, you can heal the trauma of attachment in your growth through your own intimate relationships.

We suggest you read Attachment Trauma and Repair, Attachment Formation, and Intimacy.

Hello, It's as if I'm seeing a friend's face.

From what I can gather from reading this description, it seems that you have a deep awareness of your feelings in this long-distance relationship state. This could be seen as a form of self-care. Through your somatic reactions, we can gain insight into the relationship status.

I think it would be helpful for us to talk about this.

You mentioned that when you were in love, you would occasionally experience palpitations and vomiting when you felt the relationship was unstable or uncertain about your partner's actions and responses. I'm curious to know more about this.

1. Could you please tell me how long the "period of time" lasted?

2. Might I inquire as to whether your boyfriend is aware of these episodes?

3. If he were aware of these episodes, how do you think he would respond?

4. Could I ask where you think there might be a switch for your anxiety?

5. Before seeking assistance on this platform, what methods did you explore to help yourself adjust?

I hope that by pointing out these five points, I can show you that every state has its source. If you trace back in detail to find that source and then slowly work along it to figure out what beliefs have kept you going until now, you may find that you can begin to gradually relieve anxiety.

It seems that you have associated the possibility of your anxious state with the postgraduate entrance exam. However, you have also mentioned that the anxiety has continued since the exam and is affecting your work life.

I have adapted your description of anxiety to another term that I believe may be more accurate: the state of anxiety. Since "anxiety disorder" is a term used to describe a symptom, I have chosen a neutral expression without fully understanding whether you have undergone a professional diagnosis.

I believe it would be helpful to consider how the state of anxiety specifically affects your work and life.

In a subsequent passage, you assert that you "subjectively know that the relationship is actually very stable, that there is no need to worry, and that love is just a seasoning in life, and even if it does break up, nothing will happen." At this juncture, I am compelled to share with you some of the sentiments I experienced when I read this.

1. I get the sense that you may be repressing some of your own feelings.

2. I also sense that you may be isolating yourself from your feelings.

3. It seems as though you may be trying to convince yourself.

Honey, I just want to say that these three areas are totally doable, but we do need to be careful of the attack from within when doing these three areas.

If we push too hard in a certain state, we may push ourselves too hard. When we are pushed too hard, we may experience self-attack and somatic reactions. Both of these symptoms can help us release stress, but it is also important to recognize the messages our body and mind are sending us. They are trying to tell us that it is time to take care of ourselves.

It's understandable to feel anxious when you're apart from your boyfriend. It might be helpful to consider whether there are ways to channel this anxiety in a healthy way.

Indeed, there are numerous sophisticated methods of communication in the present era. It is my conviction that, should you desire to maintain contact, you should not be concerned about the possibility of being unable to reach one another.

I believe that when we start to truly allow ourselves to express our feelings in a relationship from the bottom of our hearts, our state will become more and more stable and peaceful.

If you feel the need to express yourself, please do so freely. Similarly, if you want to connect, please feel free to do so.

If I might make one more suggestion, while medicine undoubtedly has its uses, it is not always the most effective solution.

It would be beneficial to take good care of yourself and nurture the relationship.

Hello, I'm Jokerev. I understand your distress and discomfort.

Your symptoms may be separation anxiety. This is an extreme fear of separation or loss of contact in an intimate relationship. Even if you know your relationship is stable, emotional unease may still lead to these physical symptoms.

You are not alone. Many people feel anxious when faced with uncertainty and changes in their intimate relationships. Your feelings are real.

Psychotherapy is important because it can help you understand and deal with the emotional triggers, learn effective coping strategies, and reduce anxiety.

Some drugs can help relieve severe anxiety. These include antidepressants (such as SSRIs, such as sertraline and paroxetine) and benzodiazepines (such as diazepam). They can regulate the balance of chemicals in the brain and relieve anxiety. However, drug treatment is generally prescribed after diagnosis by a professional psychiatrist. You should not decide on your own whether to use medication and what kind of medication to use.

I still recommend you see a counselor and psychologist. Try cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to adjust your thinking and coping. Consider seeing a psychiatrist to assess whether medication is needed. Remember that physical and mental health are one. It is important to take care of your mental health. Asking for help is not weak. It is a courageous choice to face problems and care for your health.

It's totally normal to feel anxious in a long-distance relationship. The symptoms you're describing, like palpitations and vomiting, are physical reactions to anxiety. It's natural to feel uncertain and unstable when you're apart from your partner, especially because distance can make it feel like things are out of your control.

It's totally normal to feel this way, but it's not necessarily separation anxiety. Separation anxiety usually involves extreme anxiety and fear when separating from a close person, so it's probably not that.

It's totally normal to feel this way, even though you know your relationship is rock solid. It's possible that your brain is associating your boyfriend with a sense of security or stability, and when this feeling is threatened, it can trigger a physical stress response.

I know that psychological counseling might not be the right fit for you, especially since you already understand all the reasons why. But I'm here to tell you that there are still a few things you can do to help yourself.

It's so important to seek professional help when you're going through something as tough as this. The situation you mentioned has seriously affected your work and life, so it's really worth speaking to a professional counselor or psychiatrist. They can help you gain a deeper understanding of your emotions, provide effective coping strategies, and prescribe medication to help relieve symptoms if necessary.

It's so important to learn relaxation techniques! You can learn relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and yoga, which can help you relax your body and relieve tension when you are anxious.

It's so important to build a support network! Share your feelings with friends, family, or people you trust. They can help you understand your situation and give you support and comfort when you need it.

It's also important to focus on your own personal growth and development. This might mean developing new interests and hobbies, or enhancing your abilities in any way you see fit. This will help you feel more confident and stable, and it'll also help you feel more worthy of love and happiness.

Finally, while medication can help you feel better, it's important to remember that it won't solve the root problem. That's why it's so important to seek psychological counseling and focus on self-growth. I really recommend that you combine the two for the best results.