My boyfriend had a memorable love affair, but I have emotional cleanliness issues. How can I adjust myself?

Hello, question asker.

I understand why you mind your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend. Your first relationship is always going to be important to you. He was the first boy you liked, but you weren't the first girl he liked, so the relationship is a bit unbalanced.

Given that your ex-girlfriend and your boyfriend were once so close, it's understandable that you're feeling insecure. You're questioning whether your boyfriend still loves his ex-girlfriend, whether she still holds a special place in his heart, and whether you'll ever be as important to him as she was.

You think you can only have one unforgettable love. But is that really true?

Every relationship has its own unique characteristics. You are unique, and so is your boyfriend. Ask your friends who have a lot of experience in relationships. They will definitely be impressed by more than one relationship.

You also mentioned that you two were torturing each other. You must have felt that you had already hurt him because you cared about your ex-girlfriend, but he is still willing to be with you. Why? Is it because he really likes you?

You know the answer.

I believe a guy who can wish his ex-girlfriend well is at least not narrow-minded. You've made a good choice.

Finally, imagine what it would be like to break up and find a guy who treats you like a white moonlight.

You are not irreplaceable. You will be fine. Good luck! ?

Dear questioner,

I'm Kelly, and I'm so excited to chat with you!

Let's dive into the exciting world of you and your boyfriend, and your boyfriend's past relationship!

They were together for six years (including three years apart), and have now embarked on a new adventure! The girl is married.

From this description, we can see that their breakup was sensible. The girl is already married, which is great because it means she's already living her best life! Perhaps many people gradually realize when they are in a relationship that the other person may not be the right person for them, and that's okay!

Love is different from marriage. Marriage is a wonderful thing! It requires a lifetime of commitment, from passion to affection, from responsibility to commitment, from obligation to partnership, from raising children together, etc.

So after three years apart, they both started new relationships!

Your boyfriend has you, his ex-girlfriend has her lover, and maybe even a child. This relationship will slowly fade with time, but it's exciting to see what the future holds for you and your boyfriend!

He said it was a love that would be forever etched in his heart, and that it would take time to fade away. He said he was excited for her future and that he would wish her nothing but happiness!

From this, we can see that her boyfriend is a sentimental person who will communicate with you honestly. He's not one to say sweet nothings to make you happy — he'll tell you exactly what he's thinking!

On the contrary, he was really honest about how bad the other person was and how he hated the other person. Instead, he saw the narrow-mindedness of his boyfriend. From these few words, I can see that your boyfriend

1: Be open and honest about your past! Don't be hypocritical or deny the relationship.

2: If he were a heartless person, perhaps you wouldn't have loved him — and that's a good thing!

3: A person who knows how to cherish and fulfill others is a tolerant person—and a wonderful person to be around!

4: You made him feel safe and willing to speak the truth. A gentleman is open and honest, and you gave him the courage to speak his mind!

He was the first boy I liked, and it was a totally new experience for me. I couldn't believe it! Every time I think about it, it makes me feel so happy and excited.

A love that is etched in your memory. You do your best to like someone for the rest of your life, right? This is his white-moonlight love, right?

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As a woman, I totally get where you're coming from! When you're in love, you're selfish, and that's a good thing! When I was young, I also had the same confusion. My husband and his college classmate were in a relationship for four years, and they broke up after graduation. The other person was also his first love.

When we first started dating, I was head over heels, and my husband was very honest with me about it. I was a little jealous, and I told him so.

My husband and I made the decision together that we were not suited for marriage. We parted on good terms and wished each other the best!

We've been married for more than 20 years now, and it's been an incredible journey! We've grown closer and learned so much about each other. We've also had the privilege of raising our children together and building our lives and home together.

My husband loves his daughter very much. Even though there have been some challenges in our marriage, we've managed to navigate them and come out stronger on the other side. The previous relationship hasn't affected our lives in any negative way.

So if you have the chance, you should definitely talk honestly with your boyfriend! The best way to communicate is to be honest with each other, so that he can also understand more about your true feelings.

I'm excited to see what the future holds! I'm ready to move on from this and not let it hold us back. I'm ready to let go and see what's next. I'm even more in love with him now!

Some things we remember will slowly fade with time, while a new life will also add many fun memories. And the best part is that if you continue to love each other, there will be five or six years, ten or six years, and these memories will belong to the two of you and be the most precious things in the world!

When we were young, we felt that our parents were the most important people in the world, and we never wanted to be separated from them for the rest of our lives.

As we grow older, we get to leave home, go to school, go to work, fall in love, get married, and gradually grow further and further away from our parents.

This is what we discovered when we grew up: everything changes slowly—and it's a wonderful thing!

On the other hand, if your boyfriend is keeping secrets from you and you don't know his past, and you are honest with him, which one do you prefer?

He chose you! He knows better than anyone who he loves and who he wants to walk with in the future. He knows he's the right person for you!

1: Communicate with each other more openly!

2: Go ahead and feel that jealousy!

3: Appreciate his integrity!

4: Give yourself some time to slowly appreciate him!

5: There's absolutely no need to rush to find answers! Just enjoy the relationship!

6: Everyone has a past, and that's a great thing! Respect others and trust yourself.

7: Read more to learn about other people, and who knows—time might just give us all the answers we're looking for!

8: Absolutely enjoy the relationship while also enriching yourself, learning more, and exploring yourself!

We can't wait to keep chatting with you!

Happy birthday!

If you want to keep the conversation going, just click "Find a coach" in the top right corner or at the bottom, and I'll be there to chat with you one-on-one!

Hello, dear girl!

Every girl wants to be the only and unforgettable person in her boyfriend's heart.

The reality is that boyfriends often have exes.

You will feel sad and hesitant, especially since he said it was a love that would last forever. That's normal.

I'd love to chat with you and I'm going to inspire you.

1. Forget about the past.

Your boyfriend is open with you about his previous relationship, which means he has nothing to hide from you.

He doesn't feel sorry about the breakup.

He has accepted their breakup and will wish his ex-girlfriend well, which shows he is mentally mature. He is willing to share his thoughts with you, which is a clear indication of this.

The fact is, many people have someone living in their hearts, but that doesn't mean anything.

That's just a part of his memory, something he's experienced.

He can love someone else in the future.

You say, "This is an unforgettable love. You should love someone with all your heart for once in a lifetime. This is his white moonlight, right?"

"This is not necessarily the case."

Modern people have multiple hobbies throughout their lives, and they're always genuine.

Since you've started dating, ask him if he's ready to start a new relationship.

You know how you feel. You like him, and you want to know how he feels about you.

In your heart, how much do you like this boyfriend?

You like him, so go for it.

That's his past.

The past is in the past.

2. Discuss your doubts with your boyfriend.

If you feel uncomfortable, ask yourself what it is you really mind.

He needs to know if he feels that he is not his first love.

He is your first love, and you feel that your relationship with him is not balanced.

There won't be any lingering worries.

Don't compare yourself to his ex.

Our thoughts are often the most important thing to us.

We must ask ourselves how we view his previous love.

If you think he once loved someone else and is suffering, unable to let go of his past, you're wrong. It makes it difficult for him to love and it's a form of self-torture.

This could also damage your relationship.

If we think differently, we must.

That's in the past.

He is with himself now, and he values himself more.

The most important thing is the present and the future.

He has loved someone else before, so he understands how lovers should get along and cherish each other. This makes him more likely to give you a healthier intimate relationship.

Let's be real, it's not always the boyfriend who can't let go. Sometimes, it's us.

3. Love yourself well and believe in your uniqueness.

I am certain that many girls will feel upset when they think about their boyfriend's ex.

I am certain that many girls will feel upset when they think about their boyfriend's ex.

Everyone wants to be the only one in their boyfriend's heart.

See your hopes, but don't let reality get in the way.

Love is neither fair nor black and white.

If you think it's worth it, you're not losing out. You like him for a reason.

But at the same time, remember that you have your own unique value.

It's about having the confidence to say:

I can like you, but if you don't like me or can't satisfy my need to be loved, I will also not like you and have the courage to leave.

Love yourself first and foremost.

We can stop worrying about our boyfriends' exes.

Just share these.

Share these.

Read the book, Love, Need to Learn.

I wish you the best!