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My parents argue every day and my younger sister is always causing trouble. How can I concentrate on my studies?

family_dysfunction communication_difficulties emotional_abuse parental_conflict childhood_trauma
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My parents argue every day and my younger sister is always causing trouble. How can I concentrate on my studies? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

My parents have a very bad relationship and cannot communicate normally. My mother despises everything about my father because he is stubborn, and she nags every day: "What kind of life am I living?"

"I'll drive you all crazy." "I'm sick of you, I can't stand you anymore."

"My sister is over 2 years old, has a strong sense of self, doesn't listen very well, and cries a lot. My mother doesn't have a good temper, so there are often scenes of adults arguing and children crying mixed together.

I feel extremely disgusted, scared, have a headache, and feel fearful and uneasy.

My mother also often says to me, "What kind of stupid character is this?" "You're exactly like your father, I'm sick of you.

"Do what you want, I don't care."

I'm 16 years old, and I've tried to reconcile my parents' relationship, but it's no use. "What do you care?" After all, adults have reasons for everything.

Recently, I have been taking online classes at home, otherwise I would have to stay in the dormitory. I plan to not go home. But they are so disruptive to my studies, every time I hear crying and quarrelling, I can't continue studying, and I feel so painful. I told them that all they would say is, "So what?

You're not going to ignore it? Why do you care so much?

"Just stop studying." I read psychology books carefully to avoid being like them, and I want to study hard and stay away from them.

Daniel William Johnson Daniel William Johnson A total of 6497 people have been helped

Hello. From your description, it seems that you are facing some challenges at the moment. It's understandable that family relationships can sometimes be a bit tense, especially when there are practical difficulties. It's not easy to stay calm in such circumstances, and it's affecting your mood and studies. I appreciate that you've tried to reconcile your parents' relationship, but it might take time for things to change. I want to reassure you that you can improve your emotions and practical problems from these perspectives:

Firstly, it is important to recognise that the challenges within the family are not a result of any actions on your part.

I'm wondering how long your parents have been in this situation. As you're still a minor, it's important to remember that your parents have a responsibility to provide a nurturing family environment. Ideally, good parents would be mindful of their own growth and provide their children with a supportive educational foundation.

However, your mother is currently experiencing some emotional instability, which has led to instances of speaking out of turn. Additionally, your parents' ongoing disagreements in front of you have the potential to impact not only you, but also your sister's growth and development. It would be beneficial for them to reflect on this and consider how their state of mind might affect the healthy growth of their children.

Secondly, it might be helpful to consider ways of improving your perception of your mother.

Given that your parents have been living together for quite some time, and that you are already 16 years old, it might be challenging to maintain a consistently happy family dynamic.

If the current situation has not been going on for too long, there may be room for improvement.

It seems as though your mother's emotions may not be as stable as they could be, and she may become easily irritated. One possible reason is that she has some issues with your father. She seems to complain about him quite often and seems dissatisfied with him.

It might be helpful to consider that your mother is also dealing with the challenges of caring for a two-year-old. It's possible that she could benefit from some extra support in this area. It's also understandable that she might be experiencing some distress, and it's not always easy to know how to manage our emotions.

It seems that she vents all her anger on you. You feel wronged and sad, but you can't change her, so you suffer even more.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether your parents were good to you. You might like to recall the events in which your parents took care of and cared about you, think about the good things they did, and this may help to alleviate some of your current resentment towards them.

If you are in a better mood, you might consider helping your mother with some tasks, relieving her of some of her stress, and trying to understand her situation. You may find that you can offer her support and understanding.

Thirdly, it is inevitable that we will encounter difficulties in life. However, these challenges can also offer valuable insights and growth opportunities.

In life, we will always face various difficulties. No family is perfect, and everyone has their own challenges. You may be interested in learning how to become a stable person and get along well with your family. It's a journey that requires reflection and learning from others. With the right approach, you can grow up to be a better version of yourself than your parents.

As you mentioned, you would like to move on from this situation. It seems that you also desire a better environment. A supportive family environment can be created and nurtured by all family members working together.

Perhaps one day, by studying psychology, you could help your parents improve their communication and enable positive interactions in the family.

I hope this is helpful to you and brings you a little peace of mind.

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Comments

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Zola Davis Learning is a flame that can light up the darkest corners of ignorance.

I'm really sorry to hear about the tough situation at home. It sounds incredibly challenging and I feel for you. It's hard when you're caught in the middle of your parents' conflicts, especially when it affects your peace of mind and studies. I wish there was a way to help them see how their actions impact you. For now, focusing on yourself and your education is a good step. Maybe finding a quiet space outside home or using headphones could help you concentrate better.

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Cerise Miller Teachers are the guides who lead students through the valleys and peaks of the learning journey.

It's heartbreaking to be in such an environment where all you want is some peace. I understand the frustration and pain that comes from trying to mediate between your parents without any success. It's important to remember that their issues are not your fault, and you shouldn't have to carry that burden. Seeking support from a counselor or a trusted adult might provide you with some guidance on how to handle things. Keep believing in yourself and your ability to create a different future.

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Norris Thomas Forgiveness is the first step towards a peaceful heart.

The stress and anxiety from the constant arguments and tension must be overwhelming. It's natural to feel scared and uneasy in such a situation. Sometimes, we can't change others, but we can take steps to protect our own mental health. Perhaps reaching out to a school counselor or a mental health professional could offer you some strategies to cope. Remember, it's okay to prioritize your wellbeing and find a safe space where you can focus on your studies and personal growth.

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Callista Hart Life is a flame that needs kindling every day.

This must be so difficult for you, being 16 and having to deal with such adult problems. It's admirable that you're trying to rise above the chaos and work hard on your studies. The fact that you're reading psychology books shows your commitment to selfimprovement and not repeating the same patterns. If staying home becomes too much, consider talking to a teacher or a school advisor about your living situation. They might be able to offer resources or support to help you through this tough time. Keep going, you're doing your best in a very hard situation.

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