Now feeling anxious, having consulted over ten times, haven't discussed the consultation objectives yet?

Dear questioner, I'm Peilü.

I'm here to understand you.

You have doubts and feel anxious about the counseling process.

——Data interpretation——

Questioner's self-statement: The counseling I'm getting has helped a little, but the counselor isn't professional. You want a clear goal and a confidentiality agreement, but these aren't discussed. You feel insecure and distrustful. You want to stop, but the counselor says you need to talk more. You're worried you've spent time and money without getting results. This situation is difficult.

I understand your feelings. If I were you, I would feel the same.

Reason analysis

What makes a good counselor?

Psychological counseling uses theories and methods to help people. We can look at a counselor's education, training, supervision, and experience.

Has the questioner considered the counselor's professionalism? I hope these ideas help.

Is the consulting relationship suitable?

When you start counseling, you should consider the counselor's professionalism. Counselors have different counseling styles and philosophies, and you have different needs. This can affect the counseling. So, you should also consider the counselor's suitability.

Advice

A good consulting relationship requires both sides to work together. In the next consultation, we suggest that you clarify your needs, communicate more with the consultant, and express your expectations and requirements for the consultation. If you have any complaints or questions, you can also explain the situation directly to your consultant.

Give yourself and the other person a chance to face the problem and solve it. You might achieve a good result.

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I love you, world.

Hello, question asker!

It's totally normal to understand the goal of the consultation yourself and have one goal at a time, right? Be aware of your own state at all times and talk to the counselor about it. Then you said that you didn't talk about the goal of the consultation. You can think about it by recalling how the two of you got to know each other and how you started the first conversation, focusing on sorting out your own thoughts.

Then you can raise it with the counselor next time and see how he responds to your question!

Absolutely! He should definitely remind you.

For a while, I also just said whatever came into my head during the counseling session because I had so many things on my mind. If you don't let me talk during the counseling session, I feel so suffocated. Then I would feel that the counseling is meaningless? And I would feel controlled by the counselor!

Then I had this great idea! I can think of something I want to talk to the counselor about this week, and I can think of it in advance and say it during the session. The questions I usually think of are related to my own core conflicts.

Just say, "Even though I've told you this and that today, I haven't strayed from my core question. I don't think the problem is very serious, and I'm excited to see what you think!"

You can definitely think about this in relation to your consulting goals. Should you say whatever comes to mind?

And you can just ask! Should he remind you? Absolutely!

Every time I feel like I'm going on and on about this and that, you should definitely remind me!

A confidentiality agreement should be signed, and I'm excited to share my experiences in this regard!

The counselor is short of money? Well, everyone is short of money these days! It's not really important to focus on this issue. I guess what you probably want to express is that

I don't think the counseling was very effective, or it was not very effective. The counselor kept dragging their feet and wouldn't let me end it.

We still need to get back to your goal for the consultation and what solution you hope to achieve from it. I'm excited to hear what you have to say!

I really want to know how you felt after hearing that last sentence! Did the counselor really say, "Ending may not be allowed"?

I absolutely believe it's best to talk about it again, to have a beginning and an end. But most importantly, I want to hear your feelings! I was so annoyed that I didn't want to say anything anymore, so it didn't matter if there was no last time.

I've got some thoughts on this!

Dear Question Asker,

I am Enoch, the respondent. Based on the questioner's description, it appears that the questioner has reservations about their counselor and has also become disengaged from the counseling relationship. However, they are uncertain about the future of the relationship and are experiencing some anxiety.

Let us assist the questioner in resolving the issues they have encountered in this counseling relationship.

1. The questioner believes that the counselor has not assisted them in setting effective counseling goals.

As stated in the title, the questioner believes that after more than ten sessions, the counselor has not assisted in establishing clear counseling goals. The questioner also feels that the counseling is somewhat inefficient. From an objective standpoint, setting counseling goals is a crucial aspect of the counseling relationship. If the counselor does not prioritize this aspect or the results are unsatisfactory, it indicates a potential deficiency in their abilities.

2. The questioner believes that the counselor is not operating in a professional or standardized manner.

The counselor did not sign a confidentiality agreement with the questioner, which created an atmosphere of unease and doubt regarding the counselor's ability to maintain professional standards and protect the confidentiality of information shared in the counseling relationship.

3. The client feels that the counselor has not provided the expected level of assistance.

The client may feel that the counselor has not provided timely reminders or guidance, which has led to doubts about the counselor's ability to deliver desired results and assistance.

4. The client feels that the investment of time and money has yielded minimal results.

The client feels that they have invested a significant amount of time and resources without achieving the desired outcome. Despite consulting for an extended period, they have not established a counseling goal or received guidance and assistance that meets their needs. Additionally, they are experiencing anxiety due to the lack of flexibility in terminating the counseling relationship.

We offer the following suggestions for the questioner, with the hope of providing assistance:

1. Discuss any issues you may have with your counselor in a professional and constructive manner.

The questioner may communicate with their counselor in a tactful manner to gain insight into the counselor's perspective on the aforementioned issues. If the questioner's primary concern pertains to the effectiveness of the counseling, they should also strive to comprehend the counselor's viewpoint with patience. In the event that the other party is unable to provide a reasonable explanation, the questioner is encouraged to consider the matter from a novel perspective.

2. If the questioner feels uncomfortable, he or she has the right to safeguard his or her legitimate rights and interests.

Should the questioner feel uncomfortable, they have the right to terminate the counseling relationship and safeguard their legitimate rights and interests. However, this should only be done after thorough consideration and evaluation, so that they understand what they have gained from the relationship and what cannot be healed, in order to more clearly carry out more effective counseling.

3. The questioner may wish to seek the advice of colleagues or other professionals in order to make an informed decision.

Should the questioner feel unable to make a decision, they are encouraged to seek guidance from their family and friends. Sharing feelings about the counseling relationship with them, listening to their advice, and making the best decision based on feedback from all sides are recommended.

Hello!

You say, "Every time I say whatever comes to mind." And that's okay! This kind of counseling method is also possible.

Humanistic counselors are great at letting you open up and share your feelings. This can be a really healing process, as you'll be able to explore your subconscious and grow as a person.

The counselor will take a look at your situation from three different angles: social, psychological, and physical.

Paying for counseling doesn't mean the counselor is short on money. It means you're taking responsibility for yourself by paying. The counselor will listen to you and help you figure out what's going on. Is it a psychological problem, neurological symptoms, or suspected mental problems? The counselor will make a referral or decide whether to confirm the counseling relationship with you and set goals together.

When you first start counseling, your counselor probably won't suggest that you stop the sessions before they understand your situation better. They'll want to make sure they're helping you in the best way possible. They'll also want to make sure you have the money to keep going, because they know that money is tight for a lot of people who are trying to get better.

If you stop the session before the counselor has a chance to understand your situation, all your hard work up to that point will be wasted. From this perspective, the counselor is responsible for you.

If you've built a solid counseling relationship with your counselor and they're unable to help you, or if you and your counselor just aren't a good match, they'll refer you to someone else or transfer you to a different counselor. During the counseling process, if you feel like you're not getting the help you need from your counselor, you have the right to end your counseling relationship.

If you feel like you can't get past your resistance and the counseling relationship feels forced, it might affect the counseling results, create a bad situation, and be detrimental to your mental health.

It's totally normal to sign a confidentiality agreement after you've established a counseling relationship. It seems like you haven't done that yet, but don't worry!

I really hope this helps you!

Hi, I'm Chu Mingdeng, and I just wanted to say that I love you all so much!

Dear Original Poster, Thank you for your message. Kind regards, [Name]

It appears that you have completed more than ten sessions without achieving the desired outcomes.

You may be experiencing some disappointment and confusion.

The first thing to note is that you have attended more than ten sessions.

This indicates that the counseling is still beneficial for you. Otherwise, why have you continued with it for so long?

Furthermore, it is evident that the counselor possesses certain competencies that contribute to your retention.

The following three points are worthy of further discussion:

Firstly, it would be beneficial to ascertain which school of thought the counselor adheres to.

If it is cognitive behavioral therapy,

Following the initial interviews, goals will have been set within two or three sessions.

If it is the psychoanalytic school, the counselor will also discuss with you the medium-term and ultimate goals of the consultation.

Unless it is the humanistic school of thought and other fields of postmodernism,

Each consultation presents an opportunity to facilitate growth, understanding, and potential.

Secondly, with regard to the principle of confidentiality

In all cases, the basic setting is as described above, and the counselor will usually inform the client during the first session. Please note that your counselor did not contact you.

I am unsure if this was simply an oversight or a lack of professionalism.

Third, you should consider whether your personality traits may have contributed to the situation.

Did you contribute to the situation in a way that could be perceived as exploitative of the counselor?

If you lack the strength and resolve to make decisions,

Furthermore, you may lack the courage to discuss your true thoughts and needs.

Subsequently, the counselor will accept this projected identification from you.

This has resulted in the current situation.

This is an opportunity for personal growth.

How might one learn to express their true thoughts and feelings?

The ability to make your own decisions is something you will have to address in the consultation.

It is imperative that you address this issue during the consultation.

It is therefore recommended that you discuss your concerns with the counselor.

Additionally, it is important to ascertain your level of familiarity with the counselor's training and qualifications.

Please indicate your level of familiarity with this matter.

It is advisable to gain further insight into the counselor's background and qualifications. Is it truly feasible to "randomly seek treatment for illness"?

In the event that you encounter a consultant who is inexperienced or lacks the requisite expertise,

Such consultants will be unable to assist you and may even prove detrimental to your interests.

Hello, question owner!

After more than ten sessions, there has been some effect, but we haven't yet reached the goal of the consultation. I'm ready to end it, and I'm excited to see what happens next! Psychological counseling is a very rigorous process that is based on the client-centered approach. From your description, this consultation situation is indeed worrying, but it's also an opportunity for growth and change.

1. The first thing to do is sign a confidentiality agreement. The counselor said this would be discussed during the consultation, but confidentiality is the counselor's ethical duty. It's a great idea to get this out of the way first!

The best part of counseling is building a trusting relationship! A confidentiality agreement is a great way to help both parties feel comfortable opening up.

2. You can truly feel whether the counselor is a great match for you. You can say whatever you want during each session, and the counselor will encourage you to speak freely. Usually, the counselor can understand what the visitor wants to say and will lead the session and grasp the overall counseling goals.

Take a moment to reflect on how the counselor guided you during each consultation. How effective was it?

It's also a great idea to find out about the counselor's school of thought and business qualifications, and consider whether they are suitable for your needs. Then, you can make a comprehensive judgment and decide whether to continue or stop the counseling.

3. If you're ready to move on from the consultation, you can check your contract to see what it says. Typically, when the client decides to end the consultation, the counselor respects that and wraps up the process. This often includes a final meeting where both parties review the work done and close the consultation. So, don't stress! You can confidently and directly express your needs.

Go for it! Trust your judgment and choices.

I love you, world! And I love you too!

Susu, the amazing heart exploration coach!

Psychological counseling has a strict logic and rules. The signs of the current situation are not reassuring. There are still things that have not been resolved, such as anxiety, distrust, lack of goals, aimlessness, and lack of confidentiality agreements.

Think about these things carefully. Talk to your counselor. The situation is uncomfortable. You can also understand your demands.

Why did you choose him for counseling? What was the chance that you found this counselor? Do you know about his training and qualifications?

Also, what is his counseling style like? Has your counseling time changed?

Has your counselor helped you set goals for counseling?

You may want to end counseling, but it can't be done suddenly. It will usually run according to the contract you signed, and the relationship won't end suddenly. Explain the situation to him. If you feel it's a bad match and you can't continue, you can ask for a different counselor. Visitors' opinions are usually respected.

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