Self-needs are met. How do you balance dependence and independence in a relationship?

Hello, question asker. I'm here for you.

From what I know, you seem sensible and independent. But deep down, you want someone to pamper you. You hope he'll see your needs and not reject you. You're eager to try, but also afraid of being rejected.

A relationship is a two-way street. As long as both parties are happy, you'll know if it's right for you.

What stage is the questioner in with their partner?

I think it's still the early stages of your relationship.

You still have a good impression of your partner. Get to know each other more to see if you're right for each other.

Don't worry. Speak up for yourself. If they can't meet your needs, explain why.

If you can see and meet the other person's needs, it should be easier to form a positive cycle.

If you find someone who can spoil you and treat you like a princess, go for it!

I hope you find someone who can spoil you.

All individuals serve as beacons, whether they are posing questions or offering responses. Through the use of language, we have the capacity to shed light on the hearts of others, and this is a phenomenon that is experienced collectively.

Good day. I am a heart coach, and I am pleased to have this opportunity to engage in discourse with you on the subject of meeting needs in relationships.

The text is brief, yet it evokes a vivid image: two intersecting circles. Each circle represents an individual, yet they are also connected to each other. This image is reminiscent of the dynamics observed in emotional relationships, where individuals maintain their independence while also forming a connection with one another.

1. In order to ascertain what one's needs are, it is first necessary to identify them.

As Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory suggests, human needs are hierarchical and can coexist. The hierarchy begins with basic physiological needs, progresses to safety, a sense of belonging, respect and self-respect, and culminates in the realization of a sense of worth.

As the level of needs increases, the necessity for satisfaction also rises. This can be achieved by turning from the external to the internal. The realization of a sense of worth is an example of this. External, material wealth can fully reflect a high sense of worth. This is evidenced by the ownership of a famous car, a luxury home, and a top 100 enterprise.

Nevertheless, the phrase "all that is left is money" demonstrates that an individual who solely depends on external sources to fulfill their intrinsic aspirations cannot do so in a sustainable manner.

In conclusion, the three realms of the human being are external pursuit, internal cultivation, and freedom. Describing life as a practice, it can be said that the question you have raised is very profound. It can only be fully comprehended through the process of each of our self-cultivation.

2. Intimate relationships are replete with "sense and sensibility."

Human beings are shaped by their environment and exist within a complex network of interpersonal relationships. In these relationships, it is possible to perceive a form of exploitation, although this is not a relationship characterised by a sense of power. Rather, it is a dynamic in which both parties recognise and utilise each other's value.

For example, marriage is not merely an expression of romantic love; it is also a matter of utilising one's values. By entering into a marital union, I gain a partner with whom I can share responsibilities and enjoy the beauty of life.

In the context of friendship, the essence of such a relationship can be defined as a mutual willingness to "bother each other." The extent to which one individual bothers or troubles the other can serve as a reflection of the value and depth of the friendship itself.

For example, in the relationship with one's parents, there is a reciprocal responsibility and filial piety, whereby parents support their children when they are young and children support their parents when they are old. From a value perspective, this can be seen as a value exchange between parents and children.

The individual in question wishes to be "selfish" and demand that their needs be met, yet simultaneously exhibits restraint. This is an exemplar of maturity in adulthood, wherein the individual is aware of their capabilities and limitations.

If we consider that emotions are the sole motivating factor in human behavior, it becomes evident that transgressing social norms and breaking rules is a relatively straightforward undertaking. In light of this, it is crucial to recognize the importance of incorporating the feelings of both parties involved in any given interaction.

For example, the same behavior is perceived as either spoiled or difficult, depending on the individual. It is therefore recommended that individuals combine their own life experience, live in the present, and experience everything that life has to offer.

It is my sincere hope that the above will prove beneficial to you. I extend my warmest regards to you and to the world, and I send you my love.

Should you wish to pursue further communication, you are invited to click on the "Find a coach" link, which can be found in the upper right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. This will enable you to engage in one-to-one communication and growth with me.

From what I can gather from the short text, it seems that the questioner is a person with "thoughts," but seems to be "ashamed" to express them. I don't know if the questioner is "dare not" to express them, or if they just can't express them clearly, and only have a vague feeling?

How do you find that sweet spot between depending on someone and being independent in a relationship? How do you know when your needs are being met? Sometimes I want to be selfish and demand what I want, but sometimes I feel that I have to satisfy my own needs.

I'm curious, does the term "emotions" have a specific meaning? Is it about family, love, or friendship?

I'd love to know what the questioner means by "dependence and independence." And what are the reference standards?

"How do I know how much to ask for?" Well, it probably depends on the relationship between your needs and your surroundings, resources, etc.

It might not just be about how you handle it yourself.

We all have different needs and wants. Sometimes, you might want something, but others may not be able to give it to you, or they may want to give it to you but may not be able to. It's okay! Sometimes, you might not want something, but others may be happy to give it to you. And sometimes, you might be able to satisfy your own needs completely, without having to consider the "right amount."

"Sometimes I want to demand my own needs, and I long for this in my heart... Sometimes I feel that I have to satisfy my own needs." The questioner is going through a lot of conflicting emotions.

I'm so sorry you're feeling conflicted.

It seems like the questioner feels like he can't meet his own needs, so he's looking to others to help out. It's a bit of a tricky situation, though, because the questioner is having a hard time expressing what he needs.

I'm sure there's nothing holding the topic starter back from speaking their needs out. It's probably just a case of feeling like they don't deserve it.

It's totally normal to feel a little nervous about rejection or embarrassment. We all have those feelings sometimes! It's also natural to worry that we shouldn't cause trouble for others.

People are relationship animals, and everything is about relationships. It's through mutual contact and conflict that relationships can be created and built.

It's totally okay to be a little shy at first! It's really helpful to let those around you know what you need, so you can all work together to build a happy, healthy relationship. If you're not sure where to start, you can always try saying it in a friendly, consultative tone.

I really hope my answer helps! Wishing you all the best!