She imitates me in everything I do. I hate it when others imitate me. How can I adjust my mindset?

Hello, classmate. I'm Jiusi, a listening coach, and I can help you.

First, praise your classmate for their learning. As you can see from the description of the problem, your classmate is highly independent and has their own routine and learning methods, and they are working well.

A roommate imitating a classmate is bound to make the classmate feel a bit anxious and disturbed.

But you should ask yourself why this classmate imitates you.

We must recognize that our behavior is not predetermined. It is shaped by our own imitation rules, which we develop through trying to imitate others in social interactions. Factors such as social trends and customs also influence our behavior.

The main representative of this theory is Gabriel Tarde, a prominent figure in the positivist school of thought. Tarde's theory of imitation asserts that significant social activities are shaped by examples.

The imitation theory states that the following imitation laws are true: (1) the closer people come into contact, the more they imitate each other; (2) lower-class people imitate upper-class people, peasants imitate nobles, and small towns and villages imitate cities; (3) when two opposing cultures intertwine, "one culture can replace the other."

New methods are also alternating with each other. For example, in the past, people used the telephone to contact each other, but now young people prefer to leave messages on WeChat. In the past, people used notebooks to take notes, but now they use iPads.

It is normal for classmates to imitate the school's academic elite. This behavior from your roommate is a clear sign that they look up to you and want to learn from you.

Let's be honest, your roommate's behavior is a clear sign of his positive feelings towards you. We always imitate the people we like. Otherwise, there would be no imitation shows.

I don't know why the original poster doesn't like being imitated, but this roommate is your real fan, and you know it.

If you want to adjust your state of mind, I advise you to imitate your roommate and become best friends with her. It's a good idea to have someone with the same schedule as you to keep you company during your studies. You can gain a sincere friendship this way. I suggest you try it.

My classmate clearly doesn't like this roommate. We need to look at this issue from a different perspective.

I'm going to tell you a little story.

There was a man who hated his neighbor's front door. It didn't bother him, but he just couldn't stand the sight of it.

One day, he couldn't stand it anymore and asked the Zen master.

The Zen master did not answer, but pointed to a cup on the coffee table and said, "I actually didn't like this cup at first. I thought it was ugly. What do you think?"

The man looked at the cup and said, "It's really not very nice-looking, and it feels a bit vulgar. It should be replaced."

"Because I later learned that this cup was personally fired by a blind parishioner, it was not easy!" the Zen master said. "The more I look at it, the more I can appreciate the intentions of that parishioner, and I've come to like this cup."

This story makes it clear that the cup is just the cup, and it has not changed from beginning to end. Your mood has no effect on the cup, and neither does the cup affect your mood. Our moods are caused by our own perceptions.

The same applies to the cup, the door, and, naturally, the roommate's behavior.

I am confident that my answer will be helpful to the student. I am certain that the questioner will be able to return to a carefree state.

Thank you for your time. I am Jiusi, on Yixinli, and I love you.

While occasional imitation may enhance a relationship, deliberate imitation can elicit negative reactions. Long-term imitation can evoke feelings of fear and disgust. It is therefore important to ascertain whether imitation is driven by a desire to emulate or learn from the other person, or whether it is a form of copycat behaviour.

Furthermore, one has the autonomy to live their life without the constant surveillance of others. It is reasonable to conclude that this would be an exceedingly uncomfortable situation, particularly given that the individual in question is looking at their phone, thereby scanning the periphery of their vision and imitating the observed behaviors, including sleeping and tidying up.

♣She imitates you regardless of your actions. You find such behavior highly objectionable.

The roommate in the dormitory is unable to remain stationary when the occupant leaves the room.

♣I am particularly disinclined to tolerate the fact that she imitates you. She even imitates your daily routine.

The act of imitation

This behavior is repugnant and deserving of disapproval.

Such behavior can be perceived as somewhat unnerving, as though a human-shaped monitor is observing one's actions, anticipating one's every move, even to the extent of following one to the bathroom. Such conduct can be regarded as somewhat unsettling.

It is imperative to reclaim control of one's life from the pervasive phenomenon of excessive imitation and over-appropriation.

It is important to recognise that each individual possesses a distinctive lifestyle.

It would be advisable to take the initiative and arrange a meeting with the other party to discuss your views.

Currently, you perceive that your roommate and classmate is observing you, which is a highly challenging and complex emotional state to navigate. If circumstances permit, it would be advantageous to engage in a dialogue with this individual. It appears that there are still unresolved issues that require clarification.

If one wishes to modify one's mentality, it is advisable to take the initiative in addressing the conflict. The situation presented by the other party is particularly challenging to comprehend, and it is therefore prudent to communicate in an appropriate manner.

One might inquire as to the motivation behind the action, whether there is a personal issue at stake, or whether the admiration is such that the other party wishes to emulate one's life.

The subject is already experiencing significant distress and frustration. It is not feasible to allow the situation to continue affecting the subject's inner confidence. The subject has numerous tasks to complete and is unable to remain in the current location. If feasible, it is recommended to also obtain video evidence and seek assistance from the teacher.

In some cases, this is not a matter that can be resolved independently, and in others, it is a problem that requires the intervention of leaders and parents. In any case, it is important to seek a satisfactory resolution through an authoritative intermediary. It is advisable to speak with a counselor or other professional about your feelings.

Please clarify the meaning of ZQ.

First, let's learn about the chameleon effect.

What is the chameleon effect?

The chameleon effect is when people unconsciously copy each other during social interactions. It's important for how we think and communicate with others.

As social animals, people learn from others to become good members of society. Social learning is when animals or groups of animals learn from other animals by watching or following their behavior.

Many animals and humans learn by watching others. This helps them avoid making mistakes or being left out. It also helps them fit in and do better in society.

Your roommate copying your habits makes you feel offended. You can express your dissatisfaction and ask why she's doing it.

Second, the questioner needs to think about why she can't accept her roommate imitating her. Is it because she can't accept her imitating her, or because anyone imitating her will arouse her resistance? Insight into the root cause of your emotions helps you understand your current confusion and solve practical problems.

We can't control others, but we can change how we think about their actions.

I listen with my heart and hope my words inspire you.

It's disturbing to have someone watching you all the time and imitating you.

I assume you've noticed she always imitates your schedule.

What have you done about this?

Nothing has been done.

You sulk and keep it to yourself. There may be a lot of speculation inside you.

This classmate may or may not know you're angry. Either way, she does what she wants.

Tell her what bothers you.

"Your schedule is always around, and it makes me feel uncomfortable."

Tell her how you feel.

Ask her how she organizes her day.

"What time do you usually go out?" "What time do you go to bed?"

Wait for her answer.

Identify the information that is hers, not your guess.

You're right. It's annoying.

This classmate is not imitating you to harm you. We can imagine a classmate who is not doing well in school. If they want to improve, they may imitate a more successful classmate.

We often ask others about their work and study schedules.

This classmate's actions make you feel uncomfortable because she imitates you silently.

Why are you so concerned about others imitating you?

Sometimes we try to be different from others because we don't feel confident. We feel like we're being overwhelmed by others.

You can avoid this by talking to your classmates.

If you keep improving, you won't care if others imitate you.

I hope this helps.

Hello, question asker! I'm so happy we've connected here.

Let's go through what you've said together, shall we?

It's so frustrating when you have a roommate who syncs everything with you and makes you feel like you're being watched!

I can see how you might be feeling a little annoyed by this, and I totally get why you're wondering why this classmate is like this.

It's so hard to understand why a college student can't have her own routine and arrange her own life, but is always following you around.

Classmate, I totally get where you're coming from. Reading what you said, I can really relate to feeling like I'm being watched all the time, and I can imagine it's a bit scary. What do you think you should do next?

I'd love to know if it's possible to transfer dormitories.

I think the easiest and most direct way is to give her some space. I'm not sure if it's possible to transfer dorms at your school, but if it is, then just change dorms!

& Rather communicate!

If you can't avoid it, then just face it head-on, my friend. Don't you think she loves to keep up with you?

Then, have a chat with her about it. Let her know why you did what you did.

A person's behavior is influenced by the environment. You can talk to her about her upbringing, her family environment, and her previous interpersonal relationships. It's important to remember that in this process, you need to first adjust yourself, communicate with her with a problem-solving attitude, manage your emotions, and avoid preconceptions.

It's so important to really listen to her. You never know, after you've had a good chat, you might understand her behaviour better.

Hey there! I just wanted to check in and see how many people are in your dorm.

I just wanted to check if you're the only two people in your dormitory? If there are others, it would be great to understand why she is imitating you alone and learning from you.

It's possible that you're so outstanding that she wants to imitate you to become as good as you. If that's the case, you can gently tell her that there's nothing wrong with her wanting to improve, but is this really the most effective way to do so?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on how to be the best version of yourself!

I'm just me, and I'm here for you. Please, speak your mind. I really hope my answer will help you see things differently and be useful to you.

Questioner:

Hello! I'm honored to meet you on Yixin.

I know you're troubled mentally.

She's annoyed and wants help with her mental problems.

Anyone who encounters someone who imitates them will feel uncomfortable.

How can you feel better?

First, calm down and analyze his actions. Is he

Is it envy or jealousy? They're two different emotions.

How much does she imitate you?

Does she dress the same? Move the same?

Or is it how they learn?

Observe and analyze his daily routine and eating habits.

Are you competing with him? These details can help you understand his behavior.

Move

People who imitate others lack conviction.

People don't know what they want and imitate others.

Find the strength to follow your own heart.

I used to hope I could be as talented as Lin Huiyin.

I tried to imitate her, but it didn't work.

Second, talk to him honestly and share your

If he doesn't listen, makes excuses, or speaks

Mock and attack you. Warn or scare him.

Finally, think like an outsider.

Your relationship with him

From the moment he imitates you, it shows that you are good at something, and he is too.

If you feel inferior, that's why he wants to surpass you.

This will make you feel better.

People feel uncomfortable when others imitate them because

Fear that the other person is more competitive than you.

This way of thinking can cause children to be afraid of being surpassed by others.

You also dislike the other person a lot.

It's an offensive act that eliminates insecurity through control. Maybe she wants control.

You have a strong will to resist temptation, and your own excellence may make him feel insecure. He hopes to

(Surpassing yourself gives you more control and less insecurity.)

Just be yourself and focus on your own thing.

Don't worry, imitation is imitation. Focus.

You won't learn, and you won't last long.

Don't make a fool of yourself. Relax and don't let your mind wander. He imitates him; you do your own thing.

Don't let him influence you. Stay focused on your studies and normal life.

Read more books to improve your outlook. Read books that improve your outlook, such as Celebrity.

Books like "The Influence" help you improve your perspective and broaden your horizons.

Book

Find yourself, affirm your values, explore yourself, develop your strengths, and focus on yourself.

Focus on your strengths and concentrate on yourself.

That's my answer. I hope you can get rid of being imitated.

A partner who listens.

Partner

Greetings.

There is a significant distinction between "extreme" imitation and "ultimate" imitation. While extreme imitation can potentially have adverse effects, ultimate imitation is likely to become a distinctive ability of the imitator. Consequently, the negative psychological well-being of the students residing in the same dormitory is a tangible reality, and such negative consequences impact others and evoke discomfort.

In the absence of an internalized sense of self-worth, individuals may resort to external sources of validation and affirmation. This can manifest as a desire to gain new value through imitation.

An individual's self-identity is contingent upon a stable sense of self-worth. In the absence of a firmly established sense of self-worth, an individual may exhibit erratic behavior and a wavering state of mind, often preoccupied with concerns about gains and losses.

The reason for this situation is that, as an adult, she has held an erroneous concept, which has not been corrected. Once corrected, she can restore her self-confidence, cease worrying about everything, and stop being in a state of tension and confusion. This is a common phenomenon for adults in difficult situations: for example, the girl they originally liked rejected them, and they felt that their self-worth no longer existed, so they became extremely negative about themselves, or they encountered setbacks at work, and other people's careless words took root in their hearts, making them feel that they are inferior to others in every way.

Secondly, throughout her developmental process, she has never received affirmation or a positive response from others, which has resulted in a lack of certainty regarding her self-worth. For instance, her family members frequently negate her, scold her, and fail to recognize her merits. Individuals who are raised in an environment where they are not affirmed will often exhibit heightened sensitivity and concern about whether they are liked and loved by others in adulthood.

Although the situation with the questioner's roommate is unclear, it is evident that she is denying her own identity and imitating others in an attempt to gain a sense of security. This mentality can be defined as an inferiority complex, which is a common psychological phenomenon. However, if it is excessive, it can lead to serious psychological problems.

One of my roommates consistently denigrated herself for being impoverished, despite the relative ease of her family circumstances. At the time, I was aware that her background was indeed challenging, and that many people simply ignored her incessant complaints. It was not until several instances that I first observed her making unsubstantiated comparisons between family backgrounds, attire, and grades. This led me to perceive her as anomalous. The last occasion on which I evaluated her, I concluded that she was internally inferior and distorted. This was shortly after she returned from shopping, when she immediately began rummaging through the bags and clothes of a wealthy individual, repeatedly asking herself, "Can you eat something so expensive?" Her behavior involved constant comparisons with others. A group of individuals swiftly discerned that she was envious and inferior. However, her actions were no longer deserving of sympathy, as she had transgressed the boundaries of interpersonal relationships and lacked the respect she owed her roommates.

If she had a firm grasp on the concepts of self-respect and self-esteem, as well as an understanding of the importance of maintaining personal boundaries, it is difficult to comprehend how she could have engaged in such an ill-advised action.

The affluent young woman then addressed the girl with low self-esteem with a look that was both sincere and contemptuous. She instructed the girl to refrain from touching her belongings, stating that her actions were inappropriate and that it was her prerogative to purchase expensive items. In response, the girl with low self-esteem calmly departed, reiterating her previous excuses. She acknowledged the financial advantages of being wealthy but questioned the cost-effectiveness of the purchase, stating that it was unnecessary and excessive. Despite this, she did not experience any sense of shame.

A person's behavior may reflect their thoughts, or it may reflect their fixed personality and persistent lifestyle. It is not easy to gain insight into another person's innermost thoughts and feelings, unless one is able to gain access to their inner world or unless the person in question is willing to reveal their thoughts and feelings. Either way, it is a challenging endeavor.

The question thus arises as to how one might extricate oneself from this quandary.

The appropriate response depends on the severity of the situation. If your roommate belongs to the first type and is simply unaware of the impact of her actions, it may be helpful to explain that her behavior is disruptive and hinders your ability to pursue your own progress. You could suggest that, while you do not intend to impose your personal preferences on her, the situation is challenging to navigate within the same living space. You might then propose that she consider finding a different roommate. It is important to communicate in a tactful and respectful manner. It is understandable that no one wishes to be imitated to the point of affecting their lives, and it is reasonable to expect that individuals do not want a clone in their lives, as it can cause confusion.

If, following some probing, it becomes evident that the individual in question is of the second type, it is imperative that the questioner convey the following message in a serious and assertive manner: "It is imperative that you cultivate your inner self-confidence. It is erroneous to assume that one's sense of worth can be ascertained by blindly emulating the actions of others. It is essential to accept and affirm your own identity. Individuals who lack an independent personality are unlikely to be appreciated by others. To enhance your inner self-confidence, it is recommended that you engage in activities such as reading books, listening to psychological FM, seeking psychological counseling, and so forth. However, it is unwise to rely on external forces that may not align with your personal values to facilitate change. This approach is irresponsible towards oneself and can potentially lead to adverse consequences for others."

Maintaining composure when communicating with others will prevent the invitation of unwarranted hostility. In the event that one's roommate exhibits behaviors as extreme as those described earlier, and is unable to listen to reason, it is necessary to take action. This may entail either avoiding the individual directly or relocating to a different dormitory. The latter option is a viable means of obtaining the peaceful student life that is a fundamental right.

From the description, it can be seen that the questioner is a person who is afraid of conflict. However, it is important to note that not every situation can be resolved through mere reflection. In the event that someone's actions have significantly disrupted one's life, it is essential to speak up and convey one's feelings to the other person. While humility is a virtue often associated with gentlemen, it is not a universal trait.

I wish you the best of success!

Good day, I am writing to express my frustration with the situation I am currently facing. I am being imitated and stared at by another individual on a regular basis, which is causing me considerable distress. I would appreciate any advice you could provide on how to handle this situation. Thank you in advance for your assistance.

It appears that your roommate's imitation is not motivated by goodwill, but rather seems to be a form of provocation. What was the motivation behind your roommate's behavior? What are the underlying reasons for her actions? It is possible that only she herself is aware of the true reasons, and there is no way for us to discern the thoughts and intentions of another individual.

What measures can be taken to prevent our roommate's actions from causing us distress?

It is inevitable that we will encounter situations in life that we do not like. These can cause feelings of annoyance and anger. For example, people who do not smoke may find it annoying when others smoke in their presence. Similarly, if you wear the same clothes as someone you dislike, you may feel annoyed and change your clothes.

To resolve this issue, it may be necessary to address the emotional dynamics between yourself and your roommate, as well as your perception of your roommate's role in your life.

For example, if your roommate is genuinely challenging your abilities and does not believe you are the sole exemplar of self-discipline and excellence,

Now, consider a scenario in which your roommate is standing next to you and observes you successfully solving a challenging problem. In response, she states, "I am surprised you were able to solve that problem."

Please describe the tone and intonation of the words that come to mind. Additionally, please indicate the emotional feelings you experience concurrently.

The tone may be perceived as disdainful and mocking, accompanied by a rolling of the eyes. At the same time, there may be a sense of anger, with thoughts such as, "What question did I ask? What is it to you?"

If your roommate is not attempting to provoke you, it is likely that she lacks confidence and admires your self-discipline and excellence. She may also be seeking to learn from you.

Now, please imagine that your colleague is standing next to you, and she sees you successfully resolve a challenging issue. Then she says, "You actually found a solution to this problem."

Please describe the tone and intonation that come to mind at this time. What kind of emotional feelings do you have?

Perhaps this time the tone of voice is one of admiration, incredulity, and worship, and the expression may be one of disbelief. The emotional feelings in your heart may become a little shy, a little embarrassed to be praised, but also very happy to be praised.

In the aforementioned example, it is unclear whether your inner feelings align with those described. The objective of this example is to highlight that when we hold differing views and emotional responses to external matters, we may project these onto the other person. This can result in a preconceived notion of the other person's actions, which may not align with the actual situation.

It is important to note that external things and people are objective in themselves, and there is no inherent difference between good and bad. Our own experiences and perceptions determine how we categorize these things. For instance, some individuals utilize money to support charitable causes and view wealth as a positive attribute. Conversely, others may use money to fund illicit activities and view poverty as a desirable state. Money itself is not inherently good or bad.

What if we could allow external factors to influence our thoughts and actions without self-judgment, and even view our colleagues with a positive attitude?

I am grateful that my colleague acts as a mirror, allowing me to gain an objective perspective on my actions.

I am grateful that my colleague is so aligned with my values that she is willing to forego her own behaviors and thoughts and choose to align with mine.

I am grateful that my roommate is able to identify and highlight areas of frustration and irritation within me, allowing me to gain a deeper understanding of my external focus.

This process can be repeated as necessary.

How would they respond if you expressed gratitude to your parents and your roommate?

From our initial interactions, I have gained the impression that you are a thoughtful and independent student. In light of this, I would like to inquire as to whether you would be amenable to allowing external factors to unfold without undue influence and viewing them with a grateful heart. I wish you continued success in your studies and hope that you will continue to embrace a positive and joyful outlook. The world and I hold you in high regard.

Hello, I'm Strawberry!

From your words, I can sense your deep sense of weariness. To put it nicely, your roommate is eager to learn from you. To put it harshly, she is always watching you and comparing herself to you, and she is envious.

Such a person is driven by a strong desire to succeed and excel. She sets an admirable goal for herself to emulate and strives to align her actions with that of the person she admires. She hopes that one day, she will reach the same level of excellence as that person and even surpass them!

There are so many fascinating people around us! They have an intriguing inferiority complex that drives them to excel. They'll try all sorts of methods to make progress and become similar to their comparison objects. What others see is that they change themselves through their own efforts. This is a great performance, and their methods are sometimes extreme.

There's this amazing phenomenon in psychology called the chameleon effect, which is basically unconscious imitation. It's when we unconsciously imitate the expressions, movements, and speech intonations of others, especially when we admire each other.

If you encounter someone like this, and you really want to be unaffected by the other person, you can try some of the following methods:

1. Change the focus!

It's so important to remember that when you're doing anything, the other person has to imitate you. It's a great opportunity for you to pay attention to her! If your focus is not on her, you'll miss out on seeing all the amazing things she does.

Try shifting the focus to other things, such as an irregular lifestyle. This kind of irregularity is a great way to keep things interesting! You go out at two o'clock and go to bed at what time you have mentioned, which makes her unable to imitate your behavior well because she cannot figure you out. You can also pay more attention to other roommates and interact with them, so as to ignore each other's behavior.

2. Embrace your own thoughts!

The reason the questioner is distressed is that she feels uncomfortable with the distress caused by being imitated by the other person. But here's the good news: you can accept your own thoughts! This belongs to your own sense of boundaries.

You feel that the other person's behavior has touched your boundaries, so you are on your guard inside. But here's a great idea! Because you don't know what your dorm room is like, can the question asker add a curtain to his or her bed, which will block the other person's view and prevent her from looking?

Third, choose to stay away!

The good news is that you have the option to spend less time in the dormitory when it's not necessary. You can even study in the classroom or library! If you really don't want to have much contact with such a person, you can always ask the teacher to change dormitories. The other person can't possibly follow you to other dormitories. If this is really the case, then you have the opportunity to directly ask the other person what their purpose is. There are two types of imitation: one is recognition of the other person, and the other is jealousy.

I really hope my answer helps the questioner! Wishing you the best!

Hello! Thank you so much for inviting me to answer. I can see your dilemma, and I'm excited to help you!

I can see that you feel annoyed because your roommate imitates you and that you don't feel comfortable being watched. I understand your feelings very well, and I'm excited to help you sort out how to better face and deal with your feelings!

First, give yourself a big pat on the back! Being imitated shows that we are recognized and even envied. The other person has always wanted to keep up with you, which reflects your excellence. You have a positive influence on others, so give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back!

Second, stay calm. The other person is just imitating, and they probably don't mean any harm. What you need to be clear about is that even if the other person imitates your appearance, it is very difficult for them to imitate your inner self. Be more confident in your own core, and focus your attention back on yourself. This may reduce your focus on her imitating behavior and thereby reduce unnecessary emotional drain.

Third, see the needs of the other person. It could be that the other person just wants to learn self-discipline by imitation, or maybe she wants to attract your attention and become closer friends. Perhaps you think that the imitation is just coincidentally synchronized. Whatever the case, you should definitely sit down and talk with your roommate, see the needs and reasons behind her behavior, and also talk about your true feelings. You might be surprised at how many things are different from what you previously thought, and increasing your comprehensive understanding will also help you better handle your relationship.

The foundation of positive interaction is a willingness to open up to each other!

I wish you the best day ever!