Since childhood, my parents have been arguing because of money; what's the point of living?

It is unfortunate to observe the complex dynamics within your family, including the recent passing of your grandfather, your father's illness, your parents' disagreements, your mother's frequent complaints, and the lack of support from other relatives. It appears that there is seldom a positive and harmonious atmosphere within your family, which can be distressing to witness.

Prolonged and uncomfortable experiences have the potential to damage an individual's emotional and character development. In this era, the elements of money, marriage, property, and health often serve as key influencing factors in determining the direction of various topics. Many individuals are able to perceive the changes occurring in the world.

It appears that material possessions are becoming increasingly significant in our society. Many individuals, including junior high school students, have begun to prioritize financial stability and status in their romantic relationships. They often cite high income, property ownership, moral character, and the willingness to pay a substantial bride price as key factors in their search for a partner. Such preferences have led to considerable disagreement and controversy.

The family is characterized by a multitude of grievances voiced by the matriarch. While the matriarch has exerted considerable effort on behalf of the family, the other family members have not been idle. They have also made their own contributions, yet they are perceived as being controlled and resented.

Discussing the situation with a mental health professional is recommended, as the circumstances are likely to be a significant source of distress. In addition, it would be beneficial to search for a crisis intervention hotline and call in time to obtain assistance. Talking to a qualified psychological counselor about your current thoughts may also be helpful. It is important to seek support, as carrying the burden alone can be detrimental to one's mental health.

Please clarify the meaning of the initials "ZQ."

Hello, question asker. I see you're confused. I hug you!

You're going through some emotional problems. I hug you again.

Roth says people who are grieving go through five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

(Source: Baidu Baike)

You didn't cause Grandpa to pass away.

Seek professional help from a counselor to mourn your grandfather.

I don't know if the original poster has read the book.

The book says there are three things in this life: our own affairs, other people's affairs, and the affairs of heaven.

Dad wasn't trying to have a stroke. He was sick and couldn't work.

Mom may have become angry with you because she had to take care of dad for so long.

My mother behaved this way because she knew "home is a place where love is always spoken of, not reason."

The questioner can help her mother take care of her sick father.

If you're not working, can you take care of your father in the evenings?

If you don't have to work at the weekend, look after your father so your mother has a break.

If you're angry at your mother, write her a letter.

Maybe when you and your mom take care of your dad, who had a stroke, she'll calm down.

I hope you can resolve your problem soon.

I'm out of ideas.

I hope my answer helps and inspires you. I'm here for you.

Yixinli loves you! Best wishes!

Hello. I understand that you are facing challenges in your family situation. It can be difficult to grow up in a household where parents are frequently in conflict, and it's natural to feel a desire to distance yourself from such a dynamic.

However, your father's illness and your elderly grandfather mean that you have the responsibility of staying and taking care of your family. Your mother expresses her concerns about your father's stroke, your elderly grandfather, and why your father's siblings are unable to assist with the care of your grandfather.

You understand that family is priceless, so you choose to put up with the challenging family environment and still take care of your family and be tolerant of your mother. I believe that every conflict with your mother is caused by extreme depression that you can't help but express in a way that is difficult for others to accept.

Given the circumstances, it is understandable that you feel overwhelmed. The loss of your grandfather, the challenges with your father's health, and the ongoing issues with your mother must be difficult to navigate. I can appreciate the pain you are experiencing.

It is not uncommon to experience a desire to end one's life in such circumstances. When coupled with the unfortunate passing of your grandfather, which you feel may have been caused by your conflict with your mother, it is understandable that you would feel a sense of guilt.

It is only natural to feel a sense of hopelessness and uncertainty in such circumstances. It is understandable that you may not know what the best course of action is, or what the future holds.

Given the uncertainty of the situation and the challenges you're facing, it's understandable that you feel lost and desperate.

I can empathize with your situation. It's understandable that you're seeking a way out.

Perhaps it would be helpful to try to let go of these minor issues. It's understandable that you're having these thoughts.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider the option of leaving this environment. I believe you may have already considered this.

First of all, I think it's important to understand that your grandfather's death may not have been an indirect result. I say "may not have been" because I'm trying to respect your point of view, even though I may not fully agree.

It is possible that the death of your grandfather may have been caused by other factors. If you did indirectly cause the death of your grandfather, it could be considered murder.

I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on this.

Secondly, I must admit that I only have a vague idea of your current situation. As a result, I am unable to offer you any advice or tell you what to do.

Ultimately, the path you choose is yours alone. While I may offer suggestions, the decision is yours to make.

I understand your frustration. I empathize with your situation. I can imagine that you feel like killing yourself would be the easiest way out. However, I want to remind you that it would only be a temporary fix. It would not solve the underlying issues. It would not change the fact that you still have responsibilities and challenges ahead of you.

If you were to choose to end it, it would have a significant impact on your future.

I imagine you have been working hard for this family since you were a child. It seems your mother would like you to get married early. You feel you are doing this for the family, but your mother may not fully appreciate your efforts. Perhaps your mother is a little selfish, or perhaps she is also on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

She has a great deal on her plate, with a seriously ill husband and children to raise.

If you feel desperate to the extreme, you may wish to consider that there is nothing wrong with committing suicide. It is understandable that you want to be relieved.

But you came here looking for answers, which suggests that you are not yet ready to give up, or perhaps you are not willing to give up. Whatever the reason, it gives you hope, even if it is only a little.

Dear stranger, it might be time to consider living for yourself. You might find it helpful to try to stay away from this family for a while. Staying away doesn't mean not caring about your parents; it just means living in a different environment.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider seeking the meaning of your own existence. It's possible that this meaning won't come to you, and it's also true that we can't tell you what it is. You might find it helpful to take action in your search.

You might like to consider trying to live on your own for a while and giving yourself a break.

The world and I send you our love and support. Dear stranger, take a moment to embrace yourself.

May I suggest that you dry your tears? When your eyes are cleansed by tears, they are clear and bright, and you may find the life that belongs to you.

Hello!

Host:

Hi there! I'm Zeng Chen, a heart coach on this platform. I've read your post and I can really feel how hard you've been struggling, as well as your feelings of self-blame and anger.

I also want to say how brave I think you are for sharing your feelings and actively seeking help on this platform. I really believe it will help you to understand yourself better and emerge from your pain.

I'm going to share some more of my thoughts and observations in the post, which I hope will help you to see your situation in a new light.

1. Your parents' quarrels are not because of you, sweetheart.

From your post, I can see that your parents have been fighting since you were young. It's so sad! It seems like one reason was because of you, and the other was because of money. I can imagine how hard it must have been for you to see them fighting for their own sake.

I can imagine it's been tough on the inside, right? I bet you've had a lot of thoughts, thinking that it's all because of you.

They also feel guilty and blame themselves, poor things.

It's totally normal to think this way when we're young. We just don't have the knowledge to understand why our parents are fighting.

But now that we've grown up, we're adults, and we can look at the reasons for our parents' discord from an adult perspective. It's actually their own problem and has nothing to do with you, sweetie.

I can see why the host might be confused. From what I can gather, the fighting isn't actually caused by them. It seems like it's just a way for them to get along or a choice they make.

I truly believe they can choose to communicate well and face their problems and issues in a non-violent way.

It's not that they don't want to communicate properly, it's just that they don't have the choice or ability to do so.

2. Why not go and find out why your lovely mum is like this?

From your post, I can see that your mom is a very hard-working lady! She has a lot on her plate, and it's understandable that she'd feel overwhelmed. It seems like she's facing some challenges, including her father's health issues and the expectation to care for her grandfather. And on top of that, she's also dealing with the pressure of having a family to take care of, including a young child. I can imagine it's a lot to handle!

From all this, I can tell that your mom is really tired and weak. Why is that?

I really feel for your mom. I can tell she's been through a lot. And I know you've been through a lot too.

Our dear mom has a family to take care of, with an elderly parent, a young child, and a father to care for. All of this can be really exhausting for her, poor thing.

She's also just an ordinary person, and with all this going on, she's bound to have a lot of feelings. But she doesn't have anyone to talk to or anyone to listen to. She needs to let these feelings out somehow, and right now, she's probably just complaining because that's what she feels like doing.

I get it. Sometimes, complaining can feel like a way to express how tired, weak, or helpless we feel. It's okay to feel that way. Especially when it comes to taking care of Grandpa. It's not easy, and it's understandable that as a daughter-in-law, you might feel like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.

My mom is really tired too. She's at her limit and can't take on any more. She's got so much on her plate and it's taking a toll on her.

But she's already used up all her energy and has no strength left.

3. It would be really lovely if you could say a proper goodbye to your grandfather.

In the post, the host mentioned that he resents everything, which indirectly caused the death of his grandfather. I'm not sure exactly what happened, but

I really feel for the original poster. I think they're under a lot of psychological pressure about their grandfather's departure. It's only natural to feel like you're to blame and guilty. After discussing this, I really want to give you a comforting hug across the screen.

At the same time, as someone who's not directly involved, I really want to help the original poster feel better.

I'd like to share a way to write a letter. It can be really helpful to write down your feelings about your grandpa and what you're feeling now.

Write down everything you want to say to your grandfather. If you can, go to his grave and burn it for him.

This is also a wonderful way for us to communicate with our loved ones who have passed away. They can know and understand.

Let's say our fond farewells to Grandpa in this way.

And you can use this method as many times as you need to. When you miss your grandpa and feel guilty, you can do this.

This can really help us get out of a sad mood! And often, when our loved ones have passed away, they actually hope that we'll live our lives well and live out the part of our lives that they didn't get to see.

I really hope my loved ones are doing well and having a good time!

4. Let it all out! Express your hatred.

From the post, it seems like the poster has a lot of resentment because of a fight with his mother. I totally get it!

I think that if we could switch places with someone else, we'd probably feel pretty similar. It's just that if we don't express our feelings properly, they can really affect us.

When our hearts are filled with hatred, it's hard to find room for joy and happiness. So, the host can try to express these feelings of hatred.

And you know what? You can even express it in writing! Just write down your feelings and resentment. See? That's how you can get rid of them!

At this time, we can even try to hold some happy and joyful emotions in our hearts!

I really hope these are helpful and inspiring for the poster. If the poster has any questions or needs more communication, just click to find a coach.

We can then chat and grow together one-on-one!

Hello, question asker!

You've already posted for help more than once with the same content, and you're ready to keep going!

And inside, you visualize the harm done to you by your family of origin and the fact that you did not take good care of your grandfather, which led to his death.

And fill your heart with deep feelings of guilty-and-remorseful-what-should-i-do-6164.html" target="_blank">remorse and guilt!

From a psychological point of view, there's a chance you're stuck in the

This is the perfect opportunity to move on from the trauma and start fresh!

If you want more effective help and can't get a formal consultation,

I highly recommend trying the psychological technique of the empty chair!

Now for the fun part! Find a closed and secure room, set up two chairs, and get ready to begin.

And make one yourself, facing one!

Now for the fun part! Get comfortable in the chair of your late, great grandfather and let it all out. Tell him everything you've been meaning to say.

Let it all out! Say everything that is weighing on you.

Then, it's time for the fun part! Change seats to Grandpa's chair and feel his thoughts and emotional state.

Now for the fun part! Try to express the thoughts that Grandpa expressed to the "yourself" sitting across from you.

And don't forget to express those emotions!

All you have to do is mourn your grandfather!

Also, don't forget to express your anger at your mother!

And don't forget to express it too!

Once you've finished, it's time to say goodbye to the old self!

The above techniques are for reference only, so let's cheer up!

I will always love you in my heart, and I can't wait to see what the future brings!