Students, trapped in internal consumption, are very anxious, but also don't want to do anything, how to break the vicious cycle?

Hello, I'm Zeyu.

Once we understand the problem and our current situation, we can change it.

The lecturer mentioned the problem encountered so far: "The workload is quite heavy, and I can do it, but I just don't want to." This causes internal conflict and anxiety.

Now, let's sort out the context of the problem. Our action is to do something else to escape. If we escape for a day, we will feel guilty about why we didn't do it. This forms a perfect closed loop.

The key to changing this pattern is to change the beliefs we hold. Homework is one thing, but the pressure of being in the top ten in the grade is another reason. We must stop worrying that not doing our homework will make us fall down the rankings and feel anxious. This feeling of anxiety will prevent us from concentrating on completing our homework and make us believe that the future may become very "bad."

Let's be logical here. How likely is this to actually happen? First, grades are a reflection of performance over time. The holidays are equal for all students, so your grades may drop, but that doesn't mean others will necessarily drop.

If this situation arises, we must take action to avoid it. What are you going to do to change the situation, and when will you choose to act?

It's normal to avoid a lot of homework. We all do it. But avoiding it is actually worse than facing it head-on. So let's try to understand why we do it. First, forgive yourself for not doing the homework. Then, make a plan to divide the homework. Don't make it too specific. And make sure you set aside time for your own activities.

Once the plan is complete, it's time to get moving. Take the homework out of your bag, then grab the tools you need and start writing. Work on one problem at a time until it's done. Don't worry about daydreaming. When you're ready, set the Pomodoro timer for five minutes and then get back to work. Use the study room if you need to.

The best way to stop the vicious cycle is to do things that make us feel like our day was not a waste and to do things that we can do without anxiety after finishing. Our attitude and the degree of planning determine when to act. If it is really difficult to act, it is better to take a few days off and have a good time.

Hello, I'm Xintan Coach Fei Yun. Life is a journey to bloom.

You want to do it but lack the motivation to do it, so you end up in a state of internal conflict.

It's like a tap that's loose, draining your energy. Since energy is limited, there's no time or energy for other things.

1. See your internal depletion.

You'll always find something to "escape" from. At the end of the day, you'll feel like you've done nothing and wasted another day.

These feelings are real. When you feel yourself, you become aware. Sometimes, we have contradictions and conflicts because we are isolated from our feelings.

Take 10-30 minutes a day to meditate, do nothing, focus on your breathing, and connect with yourself.

When we give ourselves the right perception and affirmation, our sense of self-worth will increase.

A low sense of value leads to self-doubt, self-negation, and an inferiority complex. It causes internal friction because you lack self-confidence, you can't be at peace, and you're in a state of conflict.

2. How a low sense of value hurts you.

You said you're in the top ten, but you're worried your grades will drop. This shows you lack confidence.

Confidence is having faith in yourself and the future.

Some people need external support to feel confident. Without it, they will lose confidence.

This kind of self-confidence gives others control over your life.

People with low self-worth lack security and worry. You may have achieved good results, but you still worry.

You need good grades to prove your worth.

This "proof" is not to prove to others. It is caused by your inner lack of self-worth.

Your internal conflicts, lack of motivation, and procrastination are related to your low self-worth. The simplest way to change this is to give yourself positive feedback.

Read the book The Power of Self-Growth to develop a growth mindset and reflect on yourself. You will always be aware of yourself and explore yourself.

I hope this helps. I love you.

To continue the conversation, follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service."

From your description, it seems that you have always tried to be seen by others through your excellent grades. You want to make an effort, but feel that your own hedonism may be getting in the way. You are also afraid that your grades may not meet your own expectations, and you may be afraid of being laughed at or even feel ashamed. This may be due to your childhood growth experience. Your parents or caregivers may have instilled in you the belief that getting good grades is the key to success and that a good school will prevent you from losing out at the starting line of life. You may have internalized this belief as a form of armor, which can sometimes lead to feelings of guilt. Once you lag behind, you may not receive the emotional support you need, which can further contribute to feelings of guilt that can belittle you and bind you morally. Indeed, you have had a very difficult time.

It might be helpful to consider the period from six months to two years old as a time of practical object relations. When a child is learning to walk, they may sometimes run back to their mother or caregiver before continuing on their way. This can be a source of comfort and reassurance for the child, as it allows them to feel secure and independent. However, if the caregiver responds in a different way, the child may lose the sense of security that they gained from this behaviour. This could also affect their ability to recognize the value of their own independence and to understand the meaning behind their efforts.

It's natural to have feelings like these as you figure out who you are. As you navigate different tasks and growth, it's important to affirm, appreciate, and praise yourself. Learning isn't a form of restraint; it's an opportunity for growth. Of course, there are positive and negative aspects to the experience. It's okay to accept your imperfections and recognize that they're part of the journey towards perfection. When doing your homework, try to appreciate your efforts and self-discipline. Your grades reflect your hard work, not that of others. Believe in yourself and your abilities. These feelings are a natural part of growing up. Now that you've grown, you don't need to dwell on them. Using your academic performance to validate these feelings isn't necessary.

If you feel it's not working for you, you might like to consider speaking to a counsellor or someone you trust on the platform. They can help you find a way out of your difficulties and support you in building a happy life.

Hi, I'm Bai Li Yina, and I hope my reply will be helpful.

The person who asked the question is a high school student. He already knew that there was a lot of homework during the winter vacation, but he avoided it while worrying about whether his final exam ranking would drop. Every day, he was caught in a state of anxiety and self-blame after avoidance. What should he do?

Let's take a look at the situation.

High school is a big deal. Everyone's trying to get into their dream university, so the competition is intense. Making the top ten in your final year is tough, and that's part of why you're feeling anxious. Let's figure out what's causing your anxiety together.

1. It's understandable that you're having trouble focusing on your homework. You've been under a lot of pressure at school, studying was intense, and the competition with your classmates made it difficult to relax. Now that the holidays have arrived, the competition is gone, and you're feeling the effects. Not wanting to do your homework is your brain's way of protecting you, reminding you that it's time to relax. Prolonged nervousness is harmful to you.

2. What's the source of the anxiety after relaxing? You feel like you'll fall behind if you relax. It's not allowed because you think everyone else is working hard to move forward. You see a strong person who never rests as your enemy. You want to become stronger, so you see resting and relaxing as shameful and lazy.

[Recommended Methods to Try]

1. Change your mindset and allow yourself to have free time to rest.

Make sure you set aside some time for yourself, whether it's brushing your teeth or playing, in your holiday plans. It doesn't matter what you do during this time, even if you just do nothing and daydream. It's good for your body and mind. Don't think that resting means being lazy; resting is for getting better. Only when you truly realize that you deserve to rest and that you deserve this rest can you stop blaming yourself and relax better.

2. It's important to consider whether the arrangements for the winter vacation are reasonable and if splitting them up is necessary.

You know there's a lot of work to be done, and you want to avoid it. It seems like a huge amount of work, and you feel helpless and hopeless before you even start. We need to break the task down into smaller pieces and complete each part within a certain time frame. Each time, focus on the small part you're about to do and try not to constantly think about when the whole task will be finished.

Fear makes you want to run away.

3. Having confidence in yourself is really important.

Your top 10 ranking shows what a strong, capable, and wonderful person you are. During the winter vacation, take a moment every day to look in the mirror and tell yourself, "I want to do better, I have the ability to do better, I am wonderful." It's also important to boost your self-confidence in simple ways.

This should help to reduce your fear and make you more willing to get on with your homework.

I hope these methods will be helpful for you.

It'll take time, but you'll get there. Don't worry or be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems.

You've got my support, and I'm here for you. I hope you find a solution to your problems soon and find your own comfort zone.

I'd like to thank everyone who has liked and responded to me. I wish you peace and joy.

Happy New Year, poster!

It might seem like you're not in the best place right now, and the internal conflict and anxiety might be making you feel tired and powerless. But don't worry, together we can find a way to break this vicious cycle.

You can get out of this rut. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Every small step forward is progress. You can also talk to me about how you're feeling.

As a high school student, you're currently caught between studying and having fun. This state is sometimes called "action paralysis."

When you're faced with difficulties or pressure, you might choose to avoid them and not face the problem, which can lead to procrastination and internal conflict.

You might have set your expectations too high for yourself. Striving for perfection can lead to a fear of failure, which can cause anxiety and procrastination.

You might have been under a lot of psychological pressure and emotional stress for a long time, which can lead to feeling exhausted and unable to engage in any activity.

It's not unusual for students to experience internal conflict and anxiety. These issues can often stem from concerns about the future, academic pressure, or a lack of satisfaction with self-expression. To break the vicious cycle,

First, remember that everyone has good days and bad days, and it's normal to feel anxious and reluctant to do things. Don't be too hard on yourself.

Simply put, accept your emotions.

Use small goals as benchmarks and give yourself a little pat on the back when you complete a step. This will gradually build up your confidence and motivation.

Set reasonable study and rest times. Make sure you have regular study and rest times every day to avoid overworking yourself.

Limit your exposure to things that stress you out and focus on what you can control. This can help you escape from daily stress and bring you joy and satisfaction.

It'll take time for things to change, so try not to expect too much too soon. Believe in yourself and don't stress too much. Every small step forward is progress.

Take it slow and steady. Gradually reduce internal friction and anxiety, and restore positive action.

I hope the world treats you well, and I wish you all the best.

Hello, question asker!

First, I want to give the questioner a big hug for feeling so anxious! From what you've shared, it seems like you're feeling a lot of pressure because of your heavy study load and your ranking in the class. It seems like you want to escape from studying and relax, but you're blaming yourself for wasting time and avoiding studying.

Once again, I want to give a big hug to the anxious questioner!

Let's talk about how to get into a better learning state.

First of all, it seems like your anxiety is coming from the pressure of learning and comparing your ranking. You're worried that your ranking might drop over the holidays, and now that winter vacation is here, you have a lot of homework. You're not sure if you should do it or not, but you just don't want to. This kind of procrastination shows that you have the ability, but you are also a little anxious about your ranking. It also seems like you have a lot of pressure to learn.

You came here to get help on your own, and it seems like you know that your expectations of your learning ranking are unreasonable. You put off studying and try to avoid it, while also feeling bad about yourself for wasting time. But, you study for yourself to be a better version of yourself than you were before.

If you compare yourself to others, it'll only make you feel unstable. You might as well just compare yourself to yourself, figure out why you did well or not so well on the exam, and give yourself a pat on the back if you do better next time!

Maybe others have the same anxious mindset that affects their learning and performance on exams? If you can let go of your anxiety and only compete with yourself to constantly improve, you might even perform better, right?

Second, try to avoid internal conflict and allow yourself time to relax and rest. Learning is important, but so is physical and mental health. It's important to allocate time reasonably.

So, while you're studying, don't forget to set aside some time to relax. If you feel like your learning state isn't great, it's okay to take a break. This is totally fine and really helps. Relaxing is about finding a better learning state, not wasting time!

There are also ways to relax that don't involve playing on your phone. Try to get away from phone entertainment as much as possible and do happy things that bring you closer to nature, such as taking a walk or exercising a little.

If you can't help playing with your phone and indulging in entertainment, it may simply be a case of poor self-control. In that case, you may need to seek supervision from others. For example, you could form a study group to monitor each other, or discuss with your parents and teachers how much study you will complete each day, and how long you can play with your phone, etc.

These are just my thoughts, and I hope they're helpful. Best wishes!

Good morning. I am a heart exploration coach, and I am pleased to be able to offer you some advice.

From your description, you are a student, but the winter vacation homework problem often causes internal friction, resulting in a significant amount of homework. You tend to postpone it, engaging in leisure activities instead of completing your homework. If this persists, will you be unable to finish it by the last day, leading to concerns about being perceived negatively by your instructor?

This series of questions has become a significant source of internal friction and a primary contributor to your repeated failures. What steps should you take to break this vicious cycle?

This is a skill that you must master as soon as possible.

I will then assist you in addressing the following aspects.

Let's collaborate to identify areas for improvement that will enable you to achieve your desired outcomes.

Firstly, you have a considerable amount of homework, which is consistent with the volume assigned for each subject. Therefore, it is important to assess whether the workload for each subject is substantial.

Or is it simply the sum of the parts?

There are two possible approaches to consider. If the subject matter is extensive, it may be beneficial to break it down into more manageable components. This could involve quantifying the content and establishing a daily action plan.

You may be under the impression that you are already doing this, but I must point out that you have not achieved your goals on a daily basis. If that is indeed the case, I would like to begin by affirming your efforts to complete your homework.

However, your chosen method may not be the most suitable for you, and this is something we need to discuss together.

If the plan cannot be completed, is this viewed as a negative outcome? Is the plan beyond the individual's current capabilities?

If we set an unattainable goal, such as completing ten worksheets a day, when we can only complete two, we will be discouraged and motivated to avoid it.

Please describe your personal plan and the efforts you have made thus far. You may organize your thoughts, click on My Page, and send them to me.

I would also appreciate further details on this matter.

Once you have sent me the information, I will be able to assist you in determining which subject you excel in. We can then focus on developing your strengths and addressing your weaknesses.

It is important to be self-aware and understand your own strengths and weaknesses. In addition, there are two further options to consider: if there are a lot of assignments, or if there are a few assignments but they are particularly challenging.

It may be the case that for one subject, there are a few papers, and for the rest, there are a great many more. Alternatively, it may be that the subject is not to your liking. In light of this, it would be prudent to consider the option of studying with others.

Networking also allows for scheduling appointments with colleagues. For instance, if you lack proficiency in physics, you can identify a colleague with expertise in the subject and collaborate on a project, thereby overcoming your shortcomings.

This approach can also help alleviate psychological pressure. Otherwise, if you continue to work on your homework independently, it will remain challenging, increasing the likelihood of failure.

The above two directions represent my analysis of your current plans.

Additionally, your current plan may be somewhat impractical. Furthermore, addressing the self-blame you feel after being impractical is also necessary.

As previously stated, you may not have developed an effective plan due to a lack of self-awareness, which ultimately results in inaction.

Using your mobile phone for leisure purposes represents a form of relaxation. Given the challenging nature of the homework, you have identified a simple activity that provides a much-needed break.

Playing with your phone does not indicate laziness. It is analogous to a student who has worked hard and secured a top ten position in their final exams, while also recognizing the efforts of their peers during the holiday season. However, if they engage in leisure activities on their phone, it could have a significant impact on their academic performance at the start of the semester.

This consideration will undoubtedly persist, but identifying strategies to circumvent it is crucial.

Please reflect on why your grades were so good at the end of the semester. These are all areas worth exploring.

I will await your reply and request further details.

I wish you the best of luck.

Hello!

It sounds like you're in a tough spot, with a lot on your plate and some emotional challenges. It's totally normal for students to feel this way. I've got a few tips to help you get back on your feet:

It's so important to accept your emotions.

Take it easy on yourself and relax! After an exam, it's important to give yourself some time to rest and relax.

Anxiety and internal conflict only make you more tired, and they don't help you learn or grow, sweetie.

It's so important to make a plan!

We all know how it goes. By the end of the day, you're feeling the burnout. But don't worry! You can avoid this by making a daily plan that includes time for studying, rest, and entertainment. This will help you manage your time better and improve your efficiency.

It's so important to break down tasks into smaller, more manageable pieces.

It can be really helpful to break down assignments into small tasks or modules and complete them one by one. This makes it easier to get started and prevents you from feeling overwhelmed or daunted by the task.

It's so important to create a good learning environment for yourself!

It's so important to create a calm, distraction-free space for your studies. You can do this by charging your phone in another room or using tools like focus modes or Pomodoro timers to help you concentrate.

And finally, don't forget to believe in yourself! You've got this!

You've got this! With a positive mindset and actions, you will be able to overcome this difficulty and embrace a better future.

Dear student, I know high school is stressful. Many students feel the same way.

Don't be too hard on yourself. We'll work on this together.

It's normal to feel anxious. You want to do well in school, which is a lot of pressure.

Anxiety can affect your studies and life. Try relaxation methods like deep breathing, meditation, or yoga.

These methods can help you relax, relieve anxiety, and improve your concentration.

If you don't understand, I can recommend some books or courses for you to read or study.

Second, set a reminder for "study time" and put your phone on silent. This way, you won't be distracted and can concentrate on your homework.

You can also use apps like "Focused Tomato" or "Forest Focused Forest" to help you concentrate and reduce distractions.

Use the Pomodoro Technique to make a study plan. Study for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break.

This will help you focus and manage your time better. Alternatively, you can break down your homework into smaller goals and complete a portion each day.

Also, make your self-rewards concrete and visual. For each small goal you complete, draw a star or write a sentence to encourage yourself.

You can also reward yourself when you finish a task. This can help you study harder and feel more confident.

You can also try self-affirmation methods like saying an encouraging word to yourself in the morning or writing a small self-affirmation card and putting it on your desk. These methods can help you feel more confident and worthy.

Don't blame yourself too much. You've worked hard, so don't put too much pressure on yourself.

You will get good results if you work hard at your own pace. Come on!

I hope these tips help. Good luck with your studies!

I'm here for you, my friend. I hope these words will help you think things through, find inspiration, and feel stronger.

People are a funny bunch, aren't they? They want to play, but they're afraid that if they play too much, their grades will suffer. They want to study, but they don't want to play enough, and they feel that they'd be letting themselves down if they don't.

You're caught in a tug-of-war between guilt and worry, and time just seems to slip away. You never feel like you have enough fun or learn enough. You burn through your energy inside, feel bad, judge and condemn yourself, then play and please yourself again, and beat yourself up again. Is this the state of mind you're in?

One of the best ways to solve problems is to focus. When it's time to play, play hard! When it's time to study, study hard!

It's totally normal to want to play when studying and to not want to study when playing. The same amount of time, whether you concentrate or not, determines your level of efficiency. You don't have to have a sea of questions or rely on time to study well. You can also rely on tactics and efficiency. If you demand efficiency from time, you'll find that you spend less time playing and more time studying, and your studies will become more efficient. It's a positive cycle!

The second key to solving a problem is planning. If you have a plan in mind, you'll be less likely to panic.

Start by making a reasonable plan. It's important to find a good balance between having fun and studying. Don't push yourself too hard, but don't get off track either. We all know that time is wasted when most people are self-disciplined, occasionally allowing themselves to be lazy. No one can maintain a high intensity for long, and everyone can't hold out. It's essential to find a balance between relaxation and exertion.

Don't worry! Most children on holiday are just like you. It's totally normal to need a break from studying sometimes. Everyone is more or less the same.

The third key to solving problems is to set goals. Having a goal in mind gives you strength in your steps. And remember, goals are like the Big Dipper. When you can't find your way, when your heart is uncertain and you want to give up, look up at the direction of the stars, find your place, and march towards your goal. You've got this!

Come on, you can do it!

Hello! I'm thrilled to be able to answer your question. I really hope some of my suggestions will be helpful for you.

You're facing a few challenges right now, but I know you can overcome them! The main problems you are facing at the moment are inattentiveness and anxiety when studying, and pressure about your future studies.

It's important to remember that vacations are meant to give us a chance to recharge. While it's true that students also need to study during the holidays, the overall purpose of vacations is to give us a chance to relax. So, it's totally normal to want to rest during the winter and summer vacations. We can also allow ourselves to relax properly during the first few days of vacation, without touching books and playing with mobile phones. As long as it's not excessive, doesn't harm our physical health, and doesn't affect our daily meals and rest, it's totally fine!

Second, we get to think about how we can arrange our holiday life in a way that gives us the best rest and relaxation!

The holidays are a great time to enjoy two important parts of life: rest and entertainment, and consolidating learning and completing homework.

We can make some vacation plans and do some good study planning! In these plans, we don't have to study from morning till night like we do in school. Instead, we can give ourselves a little bit of a break, so that we can combine work with rest, and have fun when we play and study hard when we study.

And finally, it's time to combine your own learning situation with your own goals and develop a learning plan that's perfect for you! This plan isn't just for fun — it's an overall learning goal.

Your grades are already excellent! The most important thing for us right now is to keep up the great work. If we maintain this level, I'm confident that we'll ace the college entrance exam. Then, on the basis of maintaining this level, we can plan how to effectively improve our scores or rankings, so that our target school can have a better basis to obtain them, or we can also set better goals to strive for on the basis of our original target school.

In this process, we don't need to put too much pressure on ourselves. For you right now, the most important thing is your attitude, and you've got it!

Your mentality is also particularly important in the college entrance exam and during our exam and learning process. Not every student can do this thing of how to bring their usual level into play, but you can!

And having a calm mind to face exams and studies will help you beat the competition and stand out from the crowd!

If you're feeling down, anxious, or stressed during the holidays or at the start of the school year, don't fret! You can easily seek timely psychological counseling to help regulate your emotional state.

You can call the national psychological hotline at home in a timely manner, and at school you can seek help from the mental health teacher.

If you find that self-regulation isn't working for you, don't worry! You can simply communicate with your parents and ask them to take you to a professional psychological institution for systematic guidance. This will help you stabilize your emotions and better face your studies and life!

We really hope you can find a way to spend the holidays that suits you! It'll be a great chance to relax, enjoy some entertainment, and get your homework done and your review done too!

I love you, world!

Dear friend, I understand your situation. It's normal to feel anxious and have difficulty concentrating. It's also normal to feel like you don't want to do your homework and want to escape when you're facing pressure.

Your anxiety and sense of depletion are a result of your high expectations of yourself and your inability to meet them. This internal conflict and struggle is very energy-consuming.

You aced your final exam, which proves you have excellent learning abilities and potential. However, this success may have also brought you additional pressure, as you are worried that relaxing during the holidays will affect your grades.

This is a reasonable concern, but it should not prevent you from enjoying your vacation and rest. Grades are only one way to measure learning outcomes, and they do not fully represent your value.

You should recognize your efforts and progress. Don't deny yourself just because of temporary difficulties.

Your anxiety is likely caused by an overemphasis on grades and concerns about the future. This anxiety is affecting your emotional state, which is then affecting your learning efficiency and motivation.

Many people experience similar things when faced with pressure and challenges. The "internal depletion" you mentioned is a manifestation of self-criticism and self-doubt. This is known in psychology as "self-depletion," which refers to the feeling of exhaustion an individual experiences after exercising self-control and the difficulty in continuing to do so.

You procrastinate because you're afraid of the task, you're a perfectionist, or you're worried about failing. You said you don't want to do the homework, and that's because you feel pressure or uncomfortable about some aspects of it.

You also mentioned that you can't help looking at your phone or finding other things to escape. This is likely a way of self-regulating to relieve the tension inside.

You're right to be concerned about your ranking during the holidays. But remember, ranking is not the only measure of your personal value. What matters most is your effort and growth.

Rest and relaxation are essential for recharging your batteries and improving your learning efficiency. They are not a waste of time; they are a necessity for facing future challenges.

Concentrate on your homework. Break down big tasks into smaller pieces and work on them one step at a time. Reward yourself for each small piece you complete.

Set a regular study schedule and stick to it. Keep your phone out of sight while studying to reduce distractions.

You should also try relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, short meditation sessions, or going for a walk, which can help reduce anxiety. If you feel like you need more support, talk to your family, friends, or teachers about how you feel.

Your value is not determined by your grades alone. It is also determined by who you are as a whole. This includes your feelings, your efforts, and your growth. All of this deserves respect and celebration.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Give yourself some leniency and space. Your future is bright, and you will overcome the difficulties you face.

You can do this. Believe in yourself. You will find the balance and enjoy your vacation while maintaining your academic performance. Good luck!

Hello. You have to deal with things. It's just a matter of finding the right opportunity to start a positive cycle. As a top ten student, you will always have fewer homework difficulties than other students who can't do it. However, you don't want the guilt of not doing your homework. These internal conflicts will be more serious than others.

"If you want to wear the crown, you must bear the weight." If you want to be ahead of your peers, you have to put in more effort. I've used these methods myself and I know they work.

[Entertainment downgrade]

Mobile phones are a problem because they offer intense entertainment. Vivid images make simple text seem boring. This is why it's difficult to concentrate on reading after playing with a mobile phone. It's also taxing on eyesight, willpower, and brainpower. From this perspective, mobile phone entertainment (games, comics, or novels) is not a tool for relaxation. Playing a mobile game requires a lot of brainpower, and losing may even lead to emotional problems.

I'm going to tell you a method called gradual transition. After playing with your phone, insert a physical activity, such as an outdoor walk. Before studying, insert an activity of reading extracurricular books (not novels, but a book of prose appreciation, such as Zhu Ziqing's "On America" or "A Brief History of America," and Xu Yuanchong's "Diary of Studying at the Southwest Associated University"). Thereafter, gradually allocate the entertainment time of playing with your phone to sports, reading, and completing your studies.

[Supervision by a friend]

Teachers love setting up study groups. It's because "fighting with others is even more fun." Studying together and comparing notes is always more motivating. Find a good friend, share your confusion with him, and invite him to join your study group to make progress together.

If you don't have anyone to trust, do this: Find your homeroom teacher or the teacher you're most comfortable with. Ask them to supervise you. Send them your winter vacation homework schedule and make a daily check-in. It's a little embarrassing, but it works.

I am confident that these two methods will be of benefit to you. If you require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact me again.

Hello, I'm Coach Yu from XinTan. Let's talk about this.

Many people say that we want to do things but don't. We often blame ourselves and give up.

We avoid things because we're afraid of failure. We're afraid that if we don't do well, people will criticize us or even damage our self-esteem.

If we don't do it, we won't face frustration or feel inadequate. So we choose to escape.

A way to express resistance and aggression is to escape. Our childhood may have been marked by strict discipline or excessive control by our parents, and we may be prone to resistance as adults.

As children, we had no choice but to obey our parents. This has left us feeling angry and unable to express our emotions. So, we lash out in other ways.

Or maybe we are tired and fed up. We don't like to admit it, but our actions show it.

Striving for good grades and rankings while struggling to concentrate on studies can make us tired and irritable.

We can change our thinking, let go of perfection, and accept our flaws. Childhood doesn't define our lives. Life is a long race.

We can set learning goals and break them down into smaller steps. This can help us feel more in control and confident. Start with simple tasks and rewards to help you connect learning with happiness.

We can learn to distract ourselves. When we are learning, try to stay away from the phone to stop thinking about certain events. When we think about things that make us anxious, we can try to distract ourselves. Meditation and mindfulness are also good ways to regulate.

If you need help, find someone you trust to talk to. You can also find a counselor. It's okay to feel this way.

Recommended book: Mindfulness: The Moment is a Flower

Greetings, It is my hope that the following response will prove beneficial to you.

As previously stated, you are proficient in your academic pursuits and possess the capacity to excel. However, you exhibit a reluctance to do so. You tend to engage in distracting behaviors, such as checking your phone or seeking alternative forms of entertainment. This leads to feelings of exhaustion and a sense of having accomplished nothing, resulting in a loss of motivation. Additionally, you experience anxiety about falling in the rankings if you continue this pattern of behavior. You find it challenging to focus on your academic responsibilities. This has led to a vicious cycle. To break this cycle, we can begin by modifying our objectives. We can also utilize the phone as a form of self-reward, transforming it from a source of temptation and distraction into a motivating factor. Furthermore, we can implement other forms of positive reinforcement and feedback to encourage the completion of academic tasks. By doing so, you can transition from a vicious to a virtuous cycle, alleviating feelings of exhaustion and anxiety.

What types of games do you typically engage with on your mobile device?

It is for these reasons that we are compelled to engage with our mobile devices, which are designed to adhere to three fundamental principles:

1. The game has a clearly defined objective.

Games typically have clearly defined objectives. For instance, the objective of "Plants vs. Zombies" is to vanquish the zombies and safeguard one's territory, while the objective of "Digging for Gold" is to excavate gold and amass wealth. The objective of "Tetris," on the other hand, is even more straightforward: to minimize one's mortality and accrue as many points as possible.

When a specific goal is established, individuals tend to perceive the game as meaningful, understand the desired outcome, and are motivated to persevere.

2. The degree of difficulty is commensurate with the player's ability.

2. The level of difficulty is calibrated to the player's skill level.

Appropriate goals can serve as a motivating factor for individuals. Goals that are perceived as being "just within reach," or moderate-intensity goals, have been found to be the most motivating.

It is notable that in gaming, levels are typically structured with varying degrees of difficulty. Typically, individuals will commence their gaming experience at the initial level.

The initial level is characterized by low difficulty and simple tasks. The subsequent level can only be accessed once the preceding level has been completed.

Consequently, the difficulty of a game is calibrated to the abilities of the player. Each challenge can be overcome through the player's own efforts, and upon completion, the player will experience a sense of accomplishment and enjoyment.

Consequently, individuals will become engrossed in the experience of advancing through levels and vanquishing monsters, deriving pleasure from these activities.

3. Timely feedback

3. Timely feedback.

A tap on the phone can send a bullet, dig up an ore, or catch a fish. These are examples of immediate feedback in games that can motivate people instantly.

In contrast, in the context of real-life activities, the provision of immediate feedback is less common. To illustrate, in the case of studying, an improvement in grades is not necessarily evident simply as a result of reading a few pages of a book or memorising a few words on a given day.

Moreover, the psychology of the "feedback effect" indicates that immediate feedback is more impactful than delayed feedback.

Therefore, we are more inclined to seek out the gratification that comes with immediate feedback in the context of gaming.

Consequently, games employ these three characteristics. Each level provides a sense of purpose, enabling players to succeed through their own efforts and receive timely feedback, which then allows them to progress to the next level and repeat this reward loop continuously, thus immersing them in the activity and preventing them from disengaging.

These three characteristics are the basis for the phenomenon of "flow," a state of deep concentration that is experienced when an individual is engaged in an activity that is both challenging and rewarding. During this state, the brain secretes several hormones that contribute to a sense of pleasure, leading to feelings of happiness and fulfillment. Consequently, individuals who have experienced this state of flow are motivated to repeat it.

However, as has been demonstrated, when one engages in gaming on a mobile device, the experience is enjoyable, yet subsequently, a sense of depletion and self-blame ensues. This illustrates that this type of flow is not a positive one, and it can be designated as "junk flow." To interrupt the current cycle, it is essential to substitute "junk flow" with "positive flow."

In light of the aforementioned characteristics, it would be beneficial to consider how these can be applied to enhance the learning process.

The question thus arises as to how this can be achieved.

First and foremost, it is imperative to have a clearly defined objective.

Do you set specific and clear learning goals on a daily basis?

In accordance with the characteristics of games, it is evident that the objectives one sets for oneself must be precise. For instance, stating that one will engage in daily study is, in fact, quite vague. It is, therefore, more prudent to set goals that are more specific, such as the number of pages of mathematical problems to be solved, the number of pages of reading material to be read, or the number of English words to be learned. This approach allows for a more targeted and focused approach to learning.

Secondly, the objective should align with one's capabilities.

In accordance with the second characteristic of games, the objectives that individuals set for themselves must align with their capabilities.

The objective should be sufficiently challenging yet achievable. If the objective is too ambitious, it can be divided into smaller, more manageable components, analogous to the progression through levels in a game. Initially, these components can be kept simple and straightforward, fostering confidence in the learning process. As proficiency increases, the difficulty can be gradually enhanced, allowing for the completion of each learning task in a step-by-step manner.

Such an approach will engender a sense of accomplishment and self-assurance, thereby fostering motivation to pursue further learning.

Thirdly, it is important to pay attention to timely feedback.

One strategy for enhancing self-discipline is to create a daily study plan. This plan should include all the tasks that need to be completed each day. Once a task is finished, a check mark should be placed in the corresponding box. However, after checking the box, it is important to take a moment to acknowledge the accomplishment. This can be done by feeling the sense of accomplishment, giving oneself a mental pat on the back, and affirming oneself.

Additionally, one may bestow upon themselves a substantial reward following the attainment of a significant objective, such as a trip, a lavish repast, or the purchase of a desired item. These may serve as positive reinforcements for academic pursuits.

If one makes learning an enjoyable experience, one will be drawn to it.

I continue to adhere to the aforementioned methods, which can be applied not only to academic pursuits but also to one's overall lifestyle. They have proven to be immensely beneficial for me. Adherence to these methods can foster increased self-discipline, while simultaneously providing the sense of accomplishment and joy that comes with continuous growth.

The aforementioned information is provided for your reference. Best wishes!

Hello, questioner!

From your description, it sounds like you have a lot of homework over the winter break, which is great! But, you can't help wanting to check your phone to relax. After a long day, you realize you haven't done anything, and you panic. You ranked tenth in your grade, and you're afraid your grades will drop, which is totally normal! I can understand your anxiety, but you've got this!

I've got a few suggestions to help you get your homework done!

First, get your parents involved! Many people find it tough to resist the allure of electronic products.

It's not that you don't have self-control, but electronic products nowadays are designed to make you like what you're doing and keep you in a happy state all the time. And people naturally prefer pleasure to suffering. So you need your parents' help to make sure you get the most out of your studies!

Here's a great tip: help you keep electronic products away, or put them in a place where you can't get them quickly. This can really help you create a fantastic learning environment!

Second, treat yourself! You can make a schedule for yourself, and as long as you complete it, you can play with your phone for a while. Then, simply put it back after playing with it.

This can be a great reward and also really motivate you to study! However, playing with your phone without supervision can be hard to resist.

This is something you can easily adapt to suit your own needs. For example, if you discover at the end of the day that you have not studied, you can immediately get down to it. This is a kind of reverse punishment that can also help you adjust your study time.

Third, when it comes to grades, it's not just about where you rank, but more importantly, how much you've learned and how well you've done. So, aim high and aim for the best grades you can get!

And guess what? Grades are more directly linked to the school you want to attend! So, forget about the rankings. What is more important is what you have mastered!

Fourth, it's time to let go of those negative emotions! If you're feeling anxious, go for a run! It's a great way to release all that pent-up energy.

I really hope this is helpful for you! Wishing you all the best!