Together for 5 years, separated for 4 years, repeatedly dreaming about my ex, what should I do?

Hello, answerer. I'm sending you a hug from afar.

You said you were with your ex for five years and broke up four years ago. He hasn't stopped contacting you in those five years. I understand why you're reluctant and persistent in this relationship. You stayed with him for five years even though he pua'd you. He loved you.

When you said, "Then he cheated on me and broke up with me. At the time, I was reluctant to let go, but I deleted and blocked all contact information," I understood exactly how you felt. You were in pain and felt helpless, trying your best to maintain a relationship but not getting a good outcome.

You have given a lot to this relationship, and it is normal to think about it. The first thing the respondent should do is accept it and allow it to happen.

You've been in a relationship for five years, and he's caused you a lot of pain. It's normal to feel pain.

Answerer, I want you to know that none of this is your fault.

You have taken your emotions very seriously, which is why you can recall those less than happy pasts.

The appearance of the dream may remind you of something not so good. Hug yourself.

You have done enough. The only thing you need to do is love your current boyfriend well. He is gentle and good enough for you.

Then love with courage.

We respect our own choices and take responsibility for them, even if we love the wrong person again.

At least, we still have ourselves.

You are not alone. Open your heart if you need to. I am a little whale, and the world and I love you.

Hello, question asker.

Your ex-boyfriend did you harm. When you were together, he threatened you and forced you into submission. He also made you feel insecure and emotionally unstable. Even after you broke up, you still felt bad when you dreamed about him.

It's not the fact that you dreamt about your ex that matters. It's how you feel about it. How did you feel in the dream? You were talking about getting along normally.

In the dream, you are not afraid.

This is a clear sign that you are returning to normal in life. You have replaced your own state of peacefulness in the dream to make it less painful.

Your current boyfriend provides you with a strong sense of security, so you don't feel fearful when you dream about your ex.

This is a kind of compensation mechanism, where something that is impossible in reality is fulfilled in a dream. It's like a retired athlete who has never won a gold medal dreaming that they have won an Olympic gold medal.

Once you come to your senses, you know that dreaming about your ex is a betrayal of your current life. So, why do you still think about your ex? You also feel guilty towards your current boyfriend.

When you wake up, if you care about it, you'll reinforce the impression of your ex-boyfriend in your mind.

When you let yourself go, the next time you meet him, you won't even remember what he looks like.

You can make painful memories less and less by creating more happy memories.

I wish you well!

Hello, question asker. I see you're confused. I'm here to help.

Why do you keep dreaming about your ex?

Maybe you didn't deal with your feelings when he broke up with you.

This is called a "unfinished event" in psychology.

You might need to deal with your feelings towards him. You can do so in the following ways.

Write him a formal farewell letter. There is no limit to the number of words or length.

When writing, don't worry about the content or handwriting.

You can also use the "empty chair technique."

The "empty chair technique" is to imagine your ex is sitting in another chair and tell him how much you miss him.

Once you've said it, you'll feel better.

When you let go, he may not appear in your dreams.

Dreams reflect our subconscious.

Your subconscious mind is still connected to your ex, so you keep dreaming about him.

I hope you can solve your problem soon.

Now I only think of the above.

I hope my answer helps and inspires you. I'm the answerer, and I study hard every day.

Best wishes, Yixinli!

!

Kindly extend a welcoming gesture in the form of a hug.

Repeatedly dreaming about your former romantic partner may be indicative of your subconscious mind processing past emotions and experiences. To assist you in coping with this situation, we have provided the following suggestions:

1. Gain an understanding of your dreams. Dreams are often a reflection of the subconscious mind and may be related to past experiences, unresolved emotions, or internal conflicts. Analyze your dreams to determine if they are related to your current life or emotional state.

2. Address unresolved emotions: If you have unresolved emotions such as anger, sadness, or guilt towards your former partner, it is advisable to identify constructive methods for managing these emotions. This may include journaling, creative activities, exercise, or seeking guidance from a trusted friend or counselor.

3. Prioritize the present: Concentrate on your current situation and relationship. Value the time you spend with your current partner and focus on the positive interactions and shared goals you have.

4. Establish a new routine: Engage in relaxing activities before bedtime, such as meditation, yoga, or reading, to reduce anxiety and stress. This will improve the quality of sleep and reduce the impact of dreams.

5. Adopt a positive mindset: Upon waking, attempt to shift your perspective by focusing on the positive aspects of the dream. For instance, you might remind yourself that the dream is merely a relic of the past and that your current circumstances are more favorable.

6. Seek professional assistance: If the dreams continue to affect your emotions and daily life, consider seeking the help of a counselor. They can help you gain a deeper understanding of the reasons behind the dreams and provide coping strategies.

7. Communicate with your current partner: It is important to maintain open communication with your current partner. Be sure to let him know that you are trying to deal with these dreams and express your gratitude for his understanding and support.

It is important to remember that dreams are a reflection of one's psychological state and do not always directly predict reality. By employing the aforementioned methods, you can gain a deeper understanding of these dreams and learn to manage them more effectively, while maintaining a focus on your current happiness and growth.

Hello, host, I hope that my sharing will be of some help to you in getting out of your current situation.

As you mentioned in your article, you were with your ex for five years, and now it's been four years since you broke up. However, you've been having dreams about your ex recently, which seem to be causing you some distress.

Perhaps we could begin by taking a moment to review the reasons behind this dream.

As you mentioned in your article, you were together for five years. Your ex-boyfriend may have caused you some pain.

It seems that your ex-partner may have threatened you on more than one occasion with something dangerous, in order to prevent you from ending the relationship.

It's possible that you may have experienced some shocks during those five years. These experiences may have been stored in your heart, uneliminated and unresolved.

Even though you have broken up, it seems there is still some residual feeling left.

If I might make a suggestion, I think it would be beneficial for you to consider that since you have broken up, it might be helpful to look towards a better life.

Given that your current partner treats you better, it might be beneficial to spend more time with them.

It is often said that time heals all wounds, and that the past is the past. Perhaps it would be helpful to try to move on from it. You might find it beneficial to mention it to your current partner as little as possible. Although the person is treating you well now, it might be best not to dwell on the past. It is important to focus on the happy life we have now.

It might be helpful to delete any information about the ex. You might want to consider throwing away anything that needs to be sent. It could be beneficial to sever all ties with the ex forever. It might be helpful to try to forget any memories you have of the ex, even if it's just one detail.

It would be beneficial to try to cherish the present and live in the moment. This could be a valuable approach in today's world.

If you feel it would be helpful, you can speak with your parents or a counselor on this platform.

I hope these thoughts are helpful to you.

Hello! I'm so happy to be able to answer your question. I really hope some of my suggestions can help you.

It's totally normal to still feel the effects of past emotional experiences, especially if our previous relationships weren't as harmonious as we'd hoped or if we lacked emotional control. It's only natural that these experiences might still affect us, even if we've moved on from them. After all, anyone who has been emotionally hurt or treated unequally will be affected by their own emotional state.

If you're in a current situation that's affecting you, it's really helpful to take a good look at what's going on. If your previous relationship has had a big impact on you and is affecting your current relationship or your daily life and emotions, it's a great idea to get some timely psychological counseling to help you work through it.

When it comes to dreams, there are two possible explanations. One is that the previous emotional trauma has had a really strong impact on us, which is why it continues to haunt us.

The second possibility is that we're feeling a bit anxious and curious about why we can't seem to get rid of our ex. It's totally normal to think of them every now and then, and it's okay to have feelings about it. What we're really anxious about is not our ex, but why we can't forget them. The focus here is on self-reflection and understanding what's going on inside us, and it's not necessarily because the reasons are still with the ex.

In this part, we're here to help you regulate your thinking and emotions by relieving anxiety and calming your mind.

I really hope that through self-reflection or with the help of a professional, you can find a way to adjust that suits you and won't affect your daily life or emotional relationships.

I love you, world! And I love you, too!

Hello, question asker! I'm June Lai Feng, and I'm excited to help you!

From your brief description, it seems that your previous relationship was a bad experience, and your frequent dreams about him have triggered anxiety. But don't worry! This is totally normal.

Repeated dreams about an ex could be your mind's way of reminding you that you're not quite finished with the relationship yet! It's possible that you're still dealing with some unresolved emotions or issues, and your dreams are your subconscious way of telling you to work through them.

It could be a subconscious psychological message! It could be that you are longing for a similar experience to your ex in some way, or your subconscious mind is reminding you of certain emotional needs related to your ex.

Another fascinating possibility is that when there are major changes or stress in your life, people tend to dream more about people and things from the past. This may be because your brain is looking for familiar things for comfort.

It doesn't necessarily mean that you're still in love with your ex; it could just be your mind trying to process past experiences. And sometimes, our dreams can be a wonderful way to help us understand our emotions and inner conflicts!

It's totally normal to dream about your ex from time to time. But if these dreams are happening more often than you'd like and they're starting to affect your daily life, it might be time to dig a little deeper and find out why.

Now, think about whether these dreams bring you a particular emotion or feeling. They could be a deep signal from your heart that you need to pay attention to your emotional state!

Dealing with unresolved emotions or issues is a gradual process—and you can do it!

First, recognize that it is totally normal to miss your ex! You don't need to feel ashamed or troubled by this. Accepting these feelings will help you deal with them.

It's time to embrace your feelings! Let yourself feel and express whatever you're feeling, whether it's sadness, anger, or disappointment. Don't suppress or ignore these feelings — accept them as natural emotional reactions!

Now for the fun part! Find a quiet moment to think about how you feel about the relationship. Try to understand why these feelings still exist and explore what you may need to work through.

Take the time to understand your feelings towards your ex. It's so important to identify the root of these feelings, such as love, anger, sadness, or loss.

Self-reflection is a great way to sort out your thoughts and find a starting point for dealing with your emotions!

Again, maintain an appropriate distance from your ex and avoid unnecessary contact. Set clear boundaries to protect your emotional and mental health. You've got this!

Then, it's time to focus on your current life and future goals! Engaging in enjoyable and meaningful activities and making new friends is a great way to create new memories and reduce your thoughts about the past.

Finally, accept the reality of the breakup and learn to let go! Try letting go of past regrets or resentments. This may take some time, but acceptance is a great way to move forward.

It is an absolutely crucial step in healing emotional wounds. By letting go, you can open up a whole new world of possibilities for your future!

Everyone's emotional recovery process is unique, and it is so important to give yourself some time and space to heal. Be patient and kind to yourself. Dealing with unresolved emotions is an amazing process of personal growth that requires time and effort.

As time goes by, you'll find that your thoughts about your ex will gradually fade away.

You are not alone! Many people have experienced similar situations and have come out the other side stronger and wiser.

The world and I love you! I wish you the happiest of times!

It is not uncommon to experience the psychological effects of a former relationship, particularly if the relationship involved manipulation and emotional distress. Your feelings are understandable, and it is commendable that you are already attempting to address these negative effects.

Firstly, it is important to recognise that dreams are a way for our brains to process the experiences and emotions of the day while we sleep. It is not always the case that dreams reflect our desires or reality directly; rather, they are a reflection of our subconscious.

It is important to note that dreaming about an ex does not necessarily indicate the presence of residual feelings or a desire to resume the relationship.

Secondly, the guilt may be due to concerns that these dreams will impact your relationship with your current partner. This is a valid concern, but it is important to recognise that your feelings and dreams are beyond your control.

Your partner's understanding and support demonstrate his commitment to your well-being and willingness to assist you in overcoming these challenges.

To better manage these dreams, we recommend the following methods:

1. Accept dreams: It is important to accept that dreams are a normal part of the sleep process and that they do not necessarily reflect one's true desires.

2. Relaxation techniques: Engaging in relaxation exercises such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga before bedtime can help reduce stress and anxiety.

3. Journaling: Documenting your dreams and feelings can assist in comprehension and management.

4. Professional counseling: Should the dreams persist in affecting your mood and quality of life, it would be advisable to seek the assistance of a counselor.

5. Focus on the present: Concentrate on your relationship with your current partner and the positive experiences you have created together.

It is important to remember that your feelings are valid and that you have the right to seek assistance in dealing with them. Your current partner's support demonstrates an understanding of your past experiences and a commitment to your future well-being.

Do not be overly critical of yourself and allow yourself the necessary time and space to recuperate.