What does she mean by this? Is it worth staying with her?

It's annoying when a friend doesn't repay a loan. The amount is small, but the money reflects the person's values.

He didn't want to pay back the money. He wanted to buy something else and pay later. He had the money, but he just wanted to use other people's money to do his own thing. He had to finish his own business first.

You should pay back a debt as soon as you can.

You borrowed the money when you were in a hurry and paid it back when it was convenient. Even close friends should be clear about their finances.

Everything should be done moderately.

Your friend didn't repay the money, showed no gratitude, and was reluctant to pay it back. Such values are problematic. The loan was to borrow money, but it was to take advantage of the situation and invade someone else's property boundaries.

You can't help someone who is broke. You can lend money, but you can't take advantage.

You're right to be angry. Your friend has no clear boundaries, while you do.

Fifty dollars shows how a person thinks about money and values. It also shows how a person thinks about other people.

Your friend doesn't consider others.

If you can still have fun together without money, try not to argue about it. If your friend is also unremarkable in other ways, just move on.

Best wishes!

Friendship is a very special word. I once read an amazing report or interview with a fascinating character about a girl who had two very close friends. They grew up together in the village, studied together in elementary school, junior high school, and high school, and later graduated from high school together!

Instead of continuing her studies, she made the bold decision to embark on a new adventure in Shenzhen after graduating from high school. Despite having no money, she was determined to seize the opportunity and made the courageous choice to sell the only mobile phone her parents had bought her to fund her journey. She shared the money with them to go out for a meal, a gesture that reflected her resilience and resourcefulness. When winter came, she embraced the challenge and worked inside the factory, living in a dormitory that might have been a little run-down, but it was her home for the night.

So I braved the cold, and she ended up going to the dormitories of two other girls. When she saw the other two girls, they had new quilts, because they had hidden their own money and not shared it with her. From that day on, she learned that some friends really would be on certain things. You can see through them, and it turns out that they are just taking advantage of your kindness.

They're not really your friends, but that's okay! True friends help each other and understand each other's feelings, just like you're both feeling right now. You lent your friend money out of goodwill, and now it's time for him to repay you! He's been waiting a long time, so it's time for you to take the initiative and go out. It's only natural that the other party can repay you and pay back the debt.

This is a great opportunity for you to learn more about this person and their true nature. It's clear that they're not interested in your friendship and are only interested in the money. It's a shame, but you've now seen their true colours. You can move on from this experience with your head held high.

He'll put his own interests first, which might mean that if you continue to spend time together in the future, he'll cause even bigger problems and disappoint you, make you despair, and make you lose a little faith in friendship. So it's probably best not to get too close to this kind of person, but it's still great to have a friend for a short time! A true friend will care about your feelings.

And the best part is, we can help each other! It's a common saying that if you lend something, you can easily borrow it again. This attitude of the other person is really not ideal. It's unfortunate that it took two months to return it to you, and they were reluctant to do so. But you know what? You can draw a clear line between you and not deal with people like this anymore!

Fifty dollars is the perfect amount to gain a clear understanding of the other person's personality.

I still highly recommend that you talk to a psychological counselor about some of your confusion and emotional expression in this area. The great news is that you can stop some people in time, see them clearly, and spend more time recognizing some of each person's values and character traits. You can also more clearly understand your own declaration of friendship. As a professional heart exploration coach, I'm excited to recommend that you read "I am you: seven practices for entering the heart of others," "Deep Connection: Using the Best People for You," "Long Story Short," and "How to Achieve Effective Socialization." Best of luck!

ZQ?

Hello. You seem angry and disappointed in your friend. You think he's a problem because he didn't repay your money on time and doesn't value your relationship. After you reminded him, he tried to stall, which made you feel uncomfortable. You even questioned whether he's worth keeping in touch with.

It's not pleasant. I've had similar experiences. I ask someone to pay me back, and they get upset.

There are a few things to think about when it comes to friendship.

First, friendships are usually formed because you like or admire the other person. There are different types of friends with whom you can maintain different distances.

We can get closer to friends who share our values. If there's more we don't understand or accept, we should keep a certain distance.

If you can't get along and don't respect each other, you probably can't be friends. Sometimes friends change. Some become distant, while others you didn't like at first become friends.

The key to a friendship is support and acceptance.

Second, no one is perfect. Everyone has flaws. Decide if you should tolerate them or keep your distance. Everyone has different views on what kind of friends are good.

What's your relationship with this friend? Is this the first time he's annoyed you by not paying back a loan?

Did he forget or do it on purpose?

Do you not care about money? If he neglects you and makes you feel uncomfortable, you might want to adjust your relationship.

If he gets along with you and has feelings for you, you can consider going out. Know how close you are.

Third, you have to decide for yourself if borrowing money is right. Many people say that borrowing money can damage a relationship. Some people think that talking about money hurts feelings.

Sometimes people need help. If you help them, it can be a beautiful experience. Your friend didn't borrow a lot of money. You are both students, right?

Is he used to borrowing money? If he asks again, you can say you don't have enough money.

Appropriate rejection also protects you. It lets the other person know your attitude and reminds him to be careful and bring the money with him. What do you think?

I hope these have helped.

Best regards!

Hello, dear question asker!

I'm sending you a big, warm hug!

From what you've told me, I totally get how you're feeling.

I can see you're feeling pretty angry.

You lend money to a friend out of the kindness of your heart, but it seems like your friend doesn't really want to pay you back. He says he's already spent the money and will pay you back later.

You didn't mind the 50 yuan, but his attitude made you feel a little uncomfortable. You felt a bit cheated and like your trust wasn't taken seriously, and you were a little angry.

I know it can be tough, but should you get along with this kind of person?

Normally, people are trustworthy and will repay a loan if they borrow money. But this person doesn't seem trustworthy, and it seems like they have you in a tricky spot. They think that if they delay repayment, you'll have to just accept it.

I'm sure that person probably feels this way.

Most people are honest and keep their promises. It's only fair that if you borrow something or money, you should return it. If someone borrows money from you, they should repay you. It's only right!

And she's had money for the past two months. It's not about how much money there is, but there is a bottom line for human character and morality.

Even a child knows that if you borrow a dollar, you have to pay it back. It's the golden rule! This is the way people get along with each other.

It's so important to follow the right path in life, especially when it comes to our relationships with others. We can't rely on lowly morals to deceive or take advantage of other people's kindness.

I'm sure you'll agree that someone like her, who cheats on her friends and everyone around her, or who owes people money, will definitely become notorious in the future. As the saying goes, good deeds never leave the house, but bad deeds travel a thousand miles.

You can also ask around to see if she borrows money from everywhere, often defaults on payments, or has recently borrowed money from many people.

Another great way to get to know someone is to keep an eye on their financial situation.

You can follow your heart, and you'll find that people who are worth keeping will bring you good, positive feelings. People who are not worth keeping will bring you feelings of disgust and hatred.

And if a friend isn't being trustworthy, it's probably best to move on.

It all comes down to how you see it.

I know you can do it! Trust your own judgment.

You are such a kindhearted person, so you will definitely have friends who are positive and uplifting to be around. Sometimes when helping a friend, you also have to consider whether the person is trustworthy, rather than just helping anyone.

And it's always a good idea to be careful and avoid being taken advantage of by someone who might try to hurt you.

Your kindness is such a good quality!

I truly believe you won't lack friends!

I really hope what I said can help you. Let's work together to improve our ability to judge people so that we don't trust the wrong people.

Every individual has the capacity to serve as a source of illumination, whether by posing a question or offering an answer. The words we utter have the potential to enlighten the hearts of many. This is a power that is inherent to us all.

Good day. I am Fei Yun, a heart exploration coach, and I empathize with your situation, as I have also experienced a similar disagreeable incident of being lent money and not repaid.

It is evident that the issue at hand is not the 50 yuan itself, but rather the other person's apparent lack of integrity, disrespect, and disregard for your position. It is perplexing why the other person is able to easily borrow money from us on numerous occasions, yet when it comes to repayment, they fail to take the initiative and we are even compelled to "demand" it.

The reason for the anger is that the behavior is interpreted as a serious injury to one's self-esteem and a drain on one's trust in the other person.

1. Perception of Emotions and Unmet Needs

Anger is a subjective emotional state that arises when an individual encounters or perceives a harmful act. It is often accompanied by a sense of injustice and a sense of helplessness after suffering harm, whether physical or mental.

As previously stated, the source of your anger is the perception that the other individual is not treating you with respect. Despite your sincere efforts, the other person's lack of integrity has caused you to feel hurt.

In your worldview, treating each other as equals is the optimal means of demonstrating sincerity. I provided you with assistance when you borrowed money, and you should also take the initiative to repay me, utilizing such positive actions to respond (or even repay) my sincerity.

The underlying cause of feelings of disrespect is a lack of self-worth. Those who lack a sense of value are more likely to be sensitive and suspicious, which can lead to feelings of inferiority.

By treating each other as equals, we can achieve a state of inner equality and thus satisfy our need for a sense of worth.

A sense of value is a subjective evaluation of oneself. Those who are confident in their own value are less likely to be affected by the stares, comments, or attitudes of others towards them.

2. Identifying the underlying pain that manifests as anger, courageously confronting the long-standing trauma, acknowledging one's own helplessness, and developing resilience.

The anger you are experiencing about this matter is a deeply rooted emotion that must be identified and addressed, as it has the potential to resurface when a similar situation arises.

A significant proportion of our unmet needs can be attributed to unmet needs experienced during our upbringing. One such example is a lack of a sense of worth. Children who are subjected to constant criticism, blame, and rejection by their parents are likely to develop a low sense of worth.

One of the most straightforward methods for enhancing one's self-worth is to consistently offer oneself constructive and encouraging feedback.

In conclusion, two methods exist for facilitating growth and achieving breakthroughs:

1. It is important to be aware of your anger and to allow it to make you stronger.

2. Accept a greater variety of individuals and circumstances. It is possible that he has forgotten; it may also be the case that he deems the sum of $50 to be insignificant. In such instances, it would be prudent to seek alternative avenues for reciprocating the gesture in question. It is also plausible that he does not attach the same degree of importance to this matter as you do.

It is my sincere hope that the aforementioned information is beneficial to you and, indeed, to the world at large. With love,

Should you wish to continue the communication process, you are invited to click on the "Find a coach" link, which can be found in the upper right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. I will communicate and grow with you on an individual basis.

Hello?

1. Existence: I frequently encounter situations where I am in a position of owing someone money, borrowing a vehicle to retrieve an item, or returning borrowed books. This is a common occurrence in life.

2. Emotions: From my own perspective, I feel a great deal of resistance and depression, and I am reluctant to proceed. This often results in sulking, and over time, I find myself in a negative mood, and even experience anger and depression.

3. Identify the underlying issue: I have considered this on numerous occasions. Do I truly have to provide the item in question? The reality is that I lack confidence and am even somewhat inferior. I am reluctant or afraid to directly decline a request for something to be borrowed.

If the individual in question demonstrates a willingness to engage in a mutually beneficial relationship, they will accept and understand your reasons for not extending credit or accepting their request. Conversely, if they do not demonstrate a willingness to engage in a mutually beneficial relationship, your refusal will not significantly impact them emotionally. This is simply an awkward situation for both parties, and it will only persist for a limited time. Your emotions will not be significantly affected for an extended period.

4. Method: From the outset, take steps to prevent situations that may cause discomfort. This requires confidence in oneself, the availability of a reliable advisor, and a reasonable and well-founded approach. It is also essential to be determined not to regret one's decision.

5. Practice: In psychology, this is a manifestation of not accepting oneself. Without a deep level of self-acceptance, individuals may experience low self-esteem, which can hinder their ability to assert boundaries with others. To overcome this, it's essential to listen to your inner voice and ask yourself: Do you want to, are you willing, is it worth it, do you dare, do you do it...? By facing the issue head-on and directly addressing the underlying emotions, you can effectively resolve it.

6. It is important to love yourself, accept yourself, and maintain a positive outlook. With time and practice, you will become more adept at handling these situations.

Hello, I'm Phil, and I hope you'll accept this warm hug.

I'm grateful you took the time to ask your question.

From what you have told me, it seems that you have a good relationship with this person.

It seems that after borrowing the money, this person did not keep their promise and took a long time to repay it.

It is often said that borrowing and repaying is a relatively straightforward process, and that it is not uncommon to borrow again, particularly in the case of loans.

In a situation of trust, when the other person is in a hurry for money or is in a difficult life situation,

I believe that offering help and assistance is also a kind of support.

It seems, however, that the person in question may not have had this mentality.

It is possible that the person in question may exhibit behavior that shirks responsibility.

In such a situation, Phil would advise against involving friends in the explanation.

It would be beneficial for you to establish your own bottom line and boundaries.

Perhaps it would be helpful to let your friend know if this behavior is causing you any discomfort.

It would be advisable to clearly state the deadline and consequences of repayment when lending money.

After all, money is meant to be spent wisely, not recklessly.

I'm pleased to see that you have this admirable mentality of helping others.

It would be wise to learn to protect yourself and avoid unnecessary suffering.

Perhaps you could talk to your friend about it.

Perhaps you could kindly ask him not to do it again.

It would be greatly appreciated if you could repay it on time.

It would be greatly appreciated if you could return it on time and not treat it as a form of indulgence.

I hope my answer can be of some assistance to you.

I hope that my answer can help you to see that the world and I love you.

You indicated that a friend borrowed 50 yuan from you and took two months to repay the loan. You inquired about the status of the repayment, and he provided the funds. While the amount was not significant, his demeanor caused you to feel annoyed and angry. You questioned why he did not repay the loan promptly, given that he is not financially constrained.

You may have anticipated that he would take the initiative to repay you, but he did not. Furthermore, his response when you inquired about the matter was unsatisfactory. This may deviate from your expectations. In your view, it is typical for friends to assist each other, and if you borrow money, you should repay it promptly. If you fail to do so, at the very least, you should maintain a positive attitude, so that others will be encouraged.

It should be noted, however, that not everyone is capable of thinking this way. If his behavior differs from what was anticipated, it may be challenging to accept, leading to feelings of irritation or anger. There are a number of potential reasons for this:

Firstly, your expectations of him are high and you care about him as a friend, but he is not meeting your expectations.

Secondly, there may be a slight imbalance in your emotional state. Despite your best efforts, he has not expressed gratitude or appreciation. This has led to the perception that he does not value your contributions.

Third, it is possible that you have not had the opportunity to observe him in a different context. It is also likely that you have formed an inaccurate impression of him based on previous interactions. When he displays behaviours that are less than ideal, it can be challenging to accept them.

Firstly, it is important to understand the underlying reasons for these emotions and to allow yourself to feel them.

Secondly, it is important to learn to express your needs, communicate effectively, and learn to say no when necessary.

It is also important to be able to distinguish between true friends and those who may be a burden.

I wish you the best of luck!

Hi, I'm Strawberry.

A friend asked the questioner for a loan. The questioner lent the money. The money belongs to the questioner, and the questioner was willing to lend it, which shows that he values this friend. The other person borrowed the money, but when he had the money, he didn't think about repaying the questioner.

The questioner had to go after him to get the money back. If you lend someone money, it's not hard to lend them more. This showed the questioner what kind of person this friend was and whether it was worth continuing to associate with him.

Where does the emotion come from?

You can understand why the questioner is so angry. You trusted him and lent him the money. You said it was a loan, so you expected it to be paid back. The questioner is angry because this friend is just like that, showing his true character with just a small amount of money. You could also say that you hate him for being so disappointing!

The questioner waited two months before asking the other person to pay back the money. You kept waiting for him to bring up the matter on his own. The longer you waited, the more disappointed you became. If the person who borrowed the money says he forgot, that is a lie.

Everyone sees things differently.

Our environment, people, and education shape our perceptions. Before lending it, the questioner believed in the other person because he was his friend. After lending it, the questioner was reluctant to believe in him because he was his friend.

Money can be a sensitive topic in any relationship. People have different perceptions and values.

Solution: Don't get emotional.

The questioner has already seen this friend clearly. It is still important to release their emotions, whether or not they continue to associate.

1. See reality: Even close relatives and friends may have problems when it comes to interests and money. It's normal for friends to have such problems. If you don't want to hurt your friendship because of money, you can refuse. Friends who are too different cannot last long.

2. Accept your emotions. It's normal to be annoyed by a friend's behavior. You just don't accept that someone with such behavior is your friend.

3. Don't take relationships too seriously. We value relationships, but we can't expect them to be one-sided. Some friends are just casual acquaintances. Treat relationships with sincerity.

The book "Don't Let Not Knowing How to Say No Hurt You" is recommended to the questioner. Sometimes we are right, so we should insist on it. We should learn to say no to unreasonable demands. I hope my answer is helpful. Best wishes.

Hello, question asker!

I am so glad you wrote to me! After reading your description, I can very much understand how you feel. I also really dislike this kind of person: someone who doesn't keep their word and has no integrity.

? I know 50 yuan is not a lot of money, but I think you can do better than this attitude! I don't know how old you are now, but I bet you're not very old, otherwise your friend wouldn't have lent you 50 yuan...

It doesn't matter how old you are or how much you borrow. If you don't pay back on time, it doesn't matter if you are reminded to pay or if you plan to buy something else first and pay later. I really can't understand what kind of mentality this is. She should know the saying, "If you pay back what you borrow, you can borrow again without any problem!"

"These eight words are the very essence of trust, integrity, and keeping one's word. They're the minimum trust and respect required for getting along with others, and they're a great place to start!

Your friend's attitude towards not keeping promises is just like this. If she lends you 50 yuan today and doesn't pay it back on time, who knows what unreliable things will happen next time? Anyway, it will make people think this way, at least I do, and that's a great opportunity to show them what a reliable person you are!

Trust is the honesty between people and the openness of heart to heart. It's the virtue of being a person and the realm of life. A person without trust can hardly establish themselves in society. But you can! Others choose to believe in you, and you can keep them believing in you by being trustworthy. Over time, people who lose trust will have fewer and fewer friends. But you can have friends who believe in you and support you! Even if they have friends who are like her, deceiving and taking advantage of each other, you can choose to be different. You can be a friend to yourself and to others!

We make friends with people who share our values, spending habits, outlook on life, etc. If someone is as untrustworthy as your friend, I think you already know what to do. It's definitely me, and I'll definitely not be friends with her anymore...

Integrity is the foundation of being a person and the basis of social interaction. "A person cannot stand without trust." If you have no credit, your aura will definitely be greatly reduced, and it will be difficult for you to be respected...

50 yuan is a small matter, but character is a big deal! Who wants to be associated with someone who casually tramps on trust and doesn't keep her promises? Not me!

The questioner doesn't need to worry, and we know that you're not reluctant to part with the 50 yuan. What you care about is her integrity and attitude towards this matter. I think the way you handled the situation and your views on this matter are spot on. There's no problem at all! The problem is with your friend. Don't waste any more energy on internal conflict. The fault lies with others. Don't punish yourself for their mistakes...

The way people get along with each other is to be comfortable. And if you don't feel comfortable anymore, it's time to find a new kind of relationship!

Our ancestors in ancient times were absolutely right to emphasize the importance of three pillars: moral character, words, and actions. It's so inspiring to see how they ranked moral character first, showing just how important character is. And it's so true that integrity is an integral part of character!

Trust is the driving force behind everything! Without it, you're like a high-rise building without a foundation, at risk of collapsing at any time. So make sure you build your trust muscles!

Trust is the glue that holds friendships and relationships together! Without it, things just don't last as long. And once it's broken, it's really hard to get it back. Think of trust as a mirror: once it's broken, it can't be fixed. Or think of a pool of clear water: once it's cloudy, it casts a shadow.

All that being said, I think you should make your own choice! I really hope you will meet better and more reliable friends in the future!

I wish you the absolute best! The world and I love you!