What if you feel ashamed of your bad reputation? I don't want people to know about this.

Hello! It seems like this is a big problem for you. You've been feeling ashamed for many years. You've been anxious since junior high because of this. Do you want to keep yourself closed off because of what happened in the past?

Your grades are dropping in junior high, and your pranks are making you unpopular. You're ashamed and don't want anyone to know.

You worry about your grades because you're afraid of being teased. You try to cause trouble and make others resist. Your classmates pay more attention to their own grades. You focus on how you see yourself. Everyone was in school, but they don't represent you now. What matters is how you live your life. There are many reasons for your grades. Not everyone can get 100% on every test.

If you face the past, you won't be afraid of the future. When you meet an old classmate, you can talk about anything. If the topic is your past grades, you can admit it. You accept that you're imperfect.

The dolphin teacher heard you. I hope my answer helps. I look forward to talking to you.

Dear questioner, Hello! It seems like you're dealing with some psychological issues and anxiety regarding your interpersonal relationships. It's making you sensitive and a bit insecure, and you're concerned about what others think of you.

It's actually a pretty normal psychological reaction. Most of us have had similar experiences to yours.

First, you need to figure out where your problems with people are coming from.

In your message, you said that when you were in junior high school, you often played with your classmates, but you may not have had a good sense of proportion, so your classmates didn't like to play with you or didn't want to spend time with you. Let's first reflect on ourselves and see if there's something inappropriate in our language.

Sometimes I still get a little heated. When I realize I've made a mistake, I just fix it right away.

Second, you can ask your friends and classmates for advice. If you ask others with an open mind and a humble attitude, they'll respond to you sincerely. As long as you're prepared mentally, can accept criticism, and can look at your own problems in the right way, you'll be fine.

Your attitude will also affect how others see you.

Third, don't be afraid of who you once were. We all gradually become better versions of ourselves through making mistakes and learning from them.

We all have our flaws, so it's important to accept them. If we've made mistakes in the past, we can learn from them and improve. Being confident enough to face ourselves and take responsibility is a valuable quality. Those who take responsibility for their actions are more likely to succeed in the future.

You'll get better and better at this.

Fourth, we can choose to explain or not explain others' comments. We need to know that time will tell. In our future interactions with others, we will get along better, show our character and outstanding qualities, and others will naturally feel it and slowly change their views and perceptions of you.

So, the real enemy may not come from others, but from yourself. How you perceive and evaluate others is up for debate, but they don't know you completely either, and we can work hard to improve in the future. Don't be afraid of your own inadequacies. We all learn and grow while constantly improving ourselves.

You have to believe in yourself. You are also very good, but nobody's perfect. We all have shortcomings, and we're always trying to improve. We try to show the best side of ourselves, learn to hide our weaknesses, and let others get to know you and the real you.

I hope this helps. I love you and I think the world loves you too.

Hello, I'm here to help.

It's important to understand your feelings.

You think you didn't get along with your classmates because your grades dropped, so you feel like you don't have good relationships with people.

You also feel ashamed of your social skills and don't want others to know, which causes you trouble.

I'd be happy to walk you through this, and I hope it will be helpful and encouraging.

1. Make a distinction between what happened in the past and what's going on now.

You feel like your interpersonal relationships weren't so great in the past, so you're not too keen on sharing that with others.

So, how do you feel about your relationships now?

Has that improved at all?

As we grow up, we often feel like we could have done better in some of our past actions.

For instance, in your third year of junior high school, due to your grades, you tended to engage in mischievous behavior and felt that people didn't like you.

During that time, it's normal for us to do things we wouldn't normally do when we look back now, because of puberty, the pressure of schoolwork, and emotional instability.

Think about it. Would you rather know how someone is now, or how they used to be?

Or how the person used to get along with their classmates?

We often make the mistake of thinking that others care about how we used to be, especially when it comes to our own affairs.

It's like when we hear a story. Even if you used to get along with your classmates and then you adjusted and got along well with them, we can see growth, not past failures.

So whenever we're troubled by something from the past, we should remind ourselves that it's in the past and that the present is more important. Your classmates are more concerned about your present.

The bottom line is, we can control the present.

2. Get to know how you evaluate people who aren't very popular.

It's important to remember that the past is gone and the present is what matters most. Your classmates are more concerned about your current performance and what you can control.

You want to know how people see people with bad interpersonal skills, and maybe you secretly hope to have better interpersonal relationships.

Why do you feel so ashamed of being unpopular?

This is what's going on in our minds.

Some people have a few friends and average interpersonal relationships, but they don't mind because they probably don't have the same thoughts as we do.

Just for a moment, imagine if you felt that if you didn't have good relationships with people, it was because you weren't good enough, that you weren't liked by others, and that you were therefore worthless.

"All human troubles stem from interpersonal relationships."

Adlerian psychology suggests there are three main areas of focus in life: making friends, work, and love.

We all need to be able to work well with others.

It's just that when you're interacting with people, you have to keep learning and adjusting.

So, having bad relationships at best just shows that things are a bit rocky right now. It doesn't mean that you're a bad person who is not liked.

And interpersonal relationships are always evolving.

As you reflect on yourself and explore these issues, you'll be better able to have ideal interpersonal relationships.

So, let's stop judging ourselves as not being liked.

If you ever felt like you weren't very popular, it was probably just because you were under a lot of pressure and didn't know how to get along with your classmates.

This is pretty much common knowledge.

Who can say they've always done everything right?

3. Try to relax and focus on the present.

3. Try to relax and focus on the present.

Sometimes, thinking about things I've learned not to dwell on can feel like a psychological burden, and I feel like I might have social anxiety.

You try to relax a little, but isn't that a form of self-torture?

The main reason is that we haven't yet had a calm, honest conversation about this.

When we can replace old ideas with new ones, we gain a great deal of freedom.

Since social phobias are accepted, why is being unpopular such a big deal?

If we don't gel with people, we just need to improve, without thinking it's a bad thing.

We all feel shame, and it can make us feel down, depressed, or cut off from others.

Shame is a painful belief. We need to learn to make friends with shame, not be afraid of it or hate facing it.

It's not shameful to have bad relationships with people.

We're all constantly learning how to interact with different people.

And relationships are a two-way street.

Even if you don't get along with people, it doesn't make you a bad person. It just means there's a problem with the relationship.

Dear questioner, Try to relax and enjoy your life.

Tell yourself, "I'm doing okay, I'm valuable, and I don't have to be ashamed."

It's important to keep repeating this.

When we affirm ourselves, it's easier to have harmonious relationships with others.

Our relationships with others are, to some extent, really about our relationships with ourselves.

Please feel free to share these.

If you're interested, you can check out "The Terrific Me."

Wishing you the best!