What should I do if I always feel guilty about my thoughts?

Hello! I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I'm here for you.

Your writing was moving. You have a strong sense of awareness. Many people have been through what you have, but not everyone can express it. Writing about your feelings helped you feel more relaxed, right?

To address your confusion, I've sorted it out.

The first is catastrophizing.

You already know the key to breaking through. Next, say hello to this thought when you fall into it again. Stay with it quietly. During this time, practice mindfulness. Believe that it won't stay for long.

The second is about feeling safe.

Feeling safe is natural. It's important for building safe relationships. You can improve this by talking more with family and friends and doing more social activities.

Listening to music can relieve tension and anxiety.

Exercise helps burn calories and improve blood circulation, which helps with negative emotions. Examples include running, swimming, and jumping rope.

The third is fear.

When fear strikes, think rationally. Tell yourself that this is not true and look for a more reasonable explanation.

Enhance your self-confidence, have confidence in yourself, and don't worry too much. The truth is, things will never be as bad as you fear. You can also verify this in your life: have all the things you are afraid of happened?

What are the chances? I'm sure you'll find out!

I hope this helps, and I wish you well!

I love you, world.

Hello! We think about everything in relation to our cognitive and behavioral patterns, which is a great thing! However, wrong perceptions can affect our thoughts and behaviors and cause us to obsess, so it's important to keep an eye on that.

[I always like to exaggerate and catastrophize an issue indefinitely. For example, if I have a certain thought, a certain conjecture, or do something, I will think that this thought is wrong and sinful. Then I fall deeper and deeper into this emotional trap, and I can't get out for a long time, always letting myself be in this self-critical, pessimistic environment. But then something amazing happens! I find myself in a different environment, one that is self-critical and pessimistic, but also full of possibilities. It's like I'm waking up from a dream and realizing that I'm in a whole new world!]

This is where we can make some changes! Let's look at some of the wrong perceptions that can affect us: magnification/reduction, blaming ourselves, generalizing, and jumping to conclusions.

Don't jump to conclusions without a basis! Ask yourself if there is really a factual basis to suggest that it is really wrong. Jumping to conclusions

Envision the best-case scenario and ask yourself: Is this really that serious, that scary? – Enlargement/reduction

Feeling that you are wrong and guilty. Is it really your fault, and is there proof that it is? - Blame yourself Let's get to the bottom of this!

If I do something wrong, it just means that there are times when I do something right! Generalizing from a single instance

Hugging you, your sensitivity, and your insecurity makes me feel very sad. But you know what? I'm going to change that! I'm going to help you feel secure in yourself and your relationships. I'm going to help you feel supported by your family of origin. I'm going to help you accept your heart for what it is. When we encounter dangerous signals or situations, we feel insecure. But we can change that too!

Always on guard!

The amazing thing about our sensitivity is that it allows us to pick up on the not-so-nice intentions or attitudes of others. This can sometimes cause internal conflict, but there's a way to turn this around! We can simply become a little more insensitive.

I highly recommend reading the book The Power of Insensitivity. You'll love it!

From your description, I can see that a lack of security and anxiety have seriously affected our physical and mental health. The good news is that we can start in several ways!

The first thing you can do is go to the psychiatric department of a hospital to find a professional/psychologist to help you feel better.

The mind and body are inextricably linked. When we face challenges in our minds, our bodies respond, and we may experience some discomfort. But there's so much we can do to support our bodies and keep them healthy!

2. We can talk to our loved ones about our worries and let them give us strength and support!

3. Self-acceptance and tolerance. It's time to focus on the amazing things we have achieved! Let's not dwell on our shortcomings, but celebrate our strengths and accomplishments.

Absolutely! You can absolutely strengthen your inner strength.

I'm really hopeful that the original poster will get better and better and be happy every day!

Hello, my friend. I'm here to support you. I've read your words and I can feel your sadness and fear. I'm with you in this unfamiliar environment, crying with you.

We are like timid rabbits, overwhelmed by the big, new world. However, we admire your courage. You speak up when something happens, face your anxieties, fears, and other pessimistic emotions, and let people with similar feelings see you. You want to save yourself through some means, and you're going to do it!

After you've sent this text, do you feel that you've become braver? You have, and I applaud you for it!

As we list and summarize the points that make you feel uncomfortable (marked with the " " symbol), we will explore ways to deal with them.

1. "It's easy to think of something in a negative way, and the more you think about it, the worse it gets."

I'm going to help you find the first thing that made you think more and more. We need to find this point on your card, see what it is, and then explore whether there is another way of looking at this matter. There is a better way to solve this problem.

Find a suitable time when you are alone, sit or lie down, and relax. Breathe in slowly through your nose and out slowly through your mouth, 3-5 times. Then, focus on the present moment and recall where you started. If you don't know where to start, that's okay. Just calm your mind and focus on your breathing.

My advice is simple: be a dwarf of action, not a giant of ideas. I used to be someone with a very big brain, very good at thinking. But I lacked the execution to do what I had thought, let alone the corresponding feedback. I had no idea whether the direction I was thinking was right or not, and it was easy to go astray.

For example, if you want to write an article, stop worrying about whether anyone will like it or whether the plot is good enough. Just get on with it. Show it to someone and get their feedback. Then, make the improvements and keep writing. You can do it.

If it's about interpersonal relationships, don't even think about it. You'll be wrong nine times out of ten.

For example, today my son went to play with a very good friend. My son walked with bouncy steps in front of his friend. His friend called out to him to wait, and he did so two or three times. My son slowed down a bit, but still walked with bouncy steps. The two were actually quite close to each other. I heard my son yell something, but because I was relatively far away from the two children, I was walking behind my son.

Then his classmate cried. She was a little girl. Later, they understood where the communication bug was through mediation with the adults.

The little girl is waiting for my son to keep up with her. My son knows that slowing down means waiting. The other person keeps him waiting and yells at him when he gets impatient, but there is no ill intent, and he doesn't want his classmate to cry. They finally understood each other, and they happily agreed to play together again in the afternoon.

I want to be clear that instead of speculating about each other's thoughts, we should talk things through. We should argue as much as possible, rather than being "opinionated" for the sake of saving face.

2. "You are sensitive and lack a sense of security. Your emotions are easily affected by the outside world, and whether it's other people, things, or trivial matters, you may feel uneasy, scared, or even break down and cry."

I used to be a sensitive and insecure person. I would even aggrieve myself to please others. I liked to pick the same seat in the same store and shop in a store just because there was someone who remembered me after repeated purchases. I was reluctant to throw away a pencil after it had been used for a short time and continued to use it by connecting it to a pencil holder. I preferred to use a pencil rather than a ballpoint pen or a marker. I don't know if this was nostalgia or familiarity.

Later, I read books and classics, such as our national classics like the Analects, the Tao Te Ching, and the I Ching, etc. They are full of wisdom, including Wang Yangming's school of thought, Su Dongpo's biography, etc. I also read modern authors like Yang Jiang and Nan Huaijin, including Feng Tang's books and Fan Deng's lectures, etc. All of these authors are very good. In the process of reading, it's like having a dialogue with the author. If you don't understand something, you can watch a video of a great teacher explaining it, and then experience it yourself. Then, you should examine yourself three times a day. Or, whenever bad thoughts come again, you can be self-aware of your emotional baby, tell it that you see it, thank it for coming, don't be afraid, let me hug you, and we are all fine.

Walk away from the thinking level and embrace the beautiful parts of your emotional baby.

3. "When attending class or being alone, I experience panic, unease, and anxiety. I easily get distracted and become immersed in boundless sadness."

Let me ask you this: is your fear of panic in class about worrying about being asked questions by the teacher? Or is it about worrying about not doing well on an exam?

Tell me, do you worry about having nothing to do when you are alone, and does your mind start to wander?

You need to understand that if you worry, fear, or dread something, it will still come as expected. Likewise, things that are not meant to happen will not happen no matter how much you wish for them to. So, if it's meant to be, just let it be.

It's okay if you don't know the answer to the teacher's question in class. We're here to learn, so it's normal not to know. It's just as well that you get a chance to clear up any doubts. I'm not going to worry about doing badly in the exam. Making mistakes and losing marks is part of the process, so I'm going to treat the exam paper like a game.

I like being alone best. I can do whatever I want without anyone to argue with.

There's no point in thinking about ten things. Get down to work and do one thing. What do you think?

4. "I am on the verge of collapse because of the double stimulation from the outside world and myself. The ripples in my heart caused by trivial matters, combined with my own brain processing things in a sad direction, have made me fragile. I heal myself by crying."

In this session, hug yourself, tell yourself that you are doing well, and learn to praise yourself more. Also, tell yourself that you are allowed to make changes, live in peace with your emotions, and live a happy life. Learn to be at peace with yourself and learn to love yourself.

Hugs!

5. I am going to become my own pillar of support, make changes, live in peace with my emotions, and live a happy life.

This is a great idea! Don't forget to exercise more often!

You will get along better and better with your emotional baby as you slowly practice. And in unfamiliar places, there are also good people, good things, and good things waiting for you to discover them!

After listing all these points, my mood has fluctuated several times with your frequency. You are a brave and strong baby, and I hug you again! I know you will wake up early and break out of your self-imposed cocoon, dance like a butterfly, and live for yourself.

Dear questioner,

Hi, I'm Kelly Shui!

"What should I do if I always feel guilty about my thoughts?"

Pain and confusion. I truly believe that after you think and reflect, you'll see things differently. You'll also be aware of your own changes because of the "obstacles" on your growth path.

[About emotions]

I can see how you might feel like this has been going on forever. It's totally normal to feel like things are amplified and catastrophic when you don't know when it started.

I just wanted to check in and see if you feel like this situation has been going on for a long time.

Our family environment is beginning to be reevaluated, and we are growing up. I'm wondering if our parents have optimistic personalities or if they like to affirm us?

Let me give you an example, my dear friend.

A while back, a friend confided in me that she felt like she'd fallen into a bottomless abyss. She told me that during her upbringing, her parents were always worried about her and told her that if she didn't study hard, she'd be looked down upon.

If there's a tiny change in her figure and she's gained a couple of pounds, her mom might say that a nice guy won't be too keen on that.

The father also told her that the world is a bit of a dark and painful place.

My friend was really struggling at the time, and we had a good long chat afterwards.

All of these experiences will add up and shape her life and values.

After all, parents are also really important people in our lives!

We can write:

1: In our past lives, did we feel like we got more criticism or more affirmation?

2: I'd love to know which five words come to mind when you think of the qualities of your parents.

For example, think of words like courage, perseverance, and strength.

3: Which of your parents' wonderful qualities have influenced you the most?

We all get caught in emotional traps sometimes. When you're in one and feeling trapped, who can you turn to for help?

Or who in the family will notice your change in mood?

It's also worth noting that emotions can build up over time. If you find yourself facing two choices at the moment, I'd love to share some existentialist ideas with you.

Existentialism is all about remorse and authenticity.

If you could live your life over again, what would you change? Or would you live the same way?

One woman who worked as a secretary said,

If I could, I would love to be more involved in life. I'd stop standing on the sidelines, afraid to really get involved, and I'd stop asking for so much from life.

There are two ways that we humans can accept our previous shortcomings.

1: You can either change now and commit to a new plan, or...

2. Or you can forgive yourself for the past, or others.

We can see our emotions and even our "sins." How do you want to start?

I truly believe that each of us will find ourselves and discover the reason behind our emotions.

[About acceptance]

I know you've had a tough time in the past. You were self-critical, pessimistic, and relatively sensitive and insecure.

You've had a tough journey, haven't you? I'm so proud of you for getting to where you are today!

I feel that you, being highly sensitive, must have a delicate emotional nature. Perhaps some of it is our environment, external conditions that have affected us.

On the bright side, it also allows you to understand yourself very well. We all know it's easy to have your mood swing greatly because of a trivial matter. I remember it was also mentioned in "High Sensitivity is a Gift" that some of us are very susceptible to external influences.

Everything has two sides, my friend.

I have a friend who is also highly sensitive, just like me! I feel so much when I read. My friend loves art, and her paintings are full of hope. There are so many things in life that we can't realize and are painful, and she expresses her emotions through painting.

Like writers and poets, she is emotionally delicate, and her words really resonate with people.

It's totally normal to feel uncomfortable or insecure about people and things. It's okay to have these feelings! They might even be protecting you in some way.

We're so afraid that if we speak, we'll try to help the fear say what it wants to say. We're afraid the fear will make you scared and insecure, and you'll be unable to stop crying.

If fear needs your help, or your best friend needs your help, or you need your own help, what can we do to calm her down?

It's totally normal to care about the tone of others and to be reminded of past experiences, embarrassing moments, and fears. But when it comes to confronting fear, why do we care so much about the tone of others? And why do we let ourselves be reminded of past experiences, embarrassing moments, and fears?

Are you safe right now? I know those past fears can really mess with our heads, but you're doing great!

I'd love to know how you managed to face such circumstances and people!

It can be really tough to write it all down and see if something similar has happened today. It's natural to feel this way. Have you thought about other ways you could approach the situation?

I just wanted to check if you talked to someone about it at the time?

If you can talk to a listening teacher or write a question now, you'll get all the support and help you need from us! And don't forget to thank yourself for having the strength to help yourself.

It's so sad to see fear, insecurity, and anxiety all the time.

Even when fear takes over your whole body, you still have the courage to write it down and seek help from others. You're so strong!

Fear can also inspire some of your amazing abilities and the importance of self-protection.

I also have to thank myself for keeping the faith that you can love yourself, help yourself, and protect yourself. I know there are still a lot of feelings at the moment, but I truly believe that they will get better and better as you grow up.

When we accept this true self, there can be vulnerability, and it's so important to remember to tell ourselves:

You can do it! You've got this! You are strong!

I admire you for being like this, and I truly believe that you will slowly change for the better.

[About my sharing]

If you're interested in this interpersonal high-sensitivity self-help guide, you can take a look. It was written by the wonderful Zhu Zhihui of Yixinli.

She's shared some of her own stories in many books and courses, including those of her teacher Cong Feicong and mine. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not perfect, and I'm still learning to embrace my imperfections.

I'll let that part of me be, and I'll do my best to find the right way to adjust myself, live in peace with my emotions, and live a happy life, just like you.

This is our common goal, and as long as we keep learning, I truly believe we'll all be at peace with ourselves.

I love you, world! And I love you, too, my dear friend!

Let's talk about this topic.

Let's start with a sense of security. Maslow defines it as a feeling of confidence, safety, and freedom from fear and anxiety. It's about having a sense of satisfaction with one's needs in the present and future.

If we look back at our childhood experiences and see that our relationship environment has always made us feel insecure, with a lot of dislike, hatred, annoyance, accusations, punishment, neglect, etc., and we have never been able to trust or rely on anyone, we will have a lot of hostile experiences. These experiences of relationship often affect us until we grow up, and they will spread to all kinds of other relationships, always making us worry and even feel that the relationship environment around us is full of insecurity and hostility.

Our feelings about relationships are often influenced by how we feel about ourselves and others. It's simple: when we feel that there is a lot about ourselves that is not good, or even that we are bad in many ways, we can easily worry or even feel that other people just don't like us and hate us.

When we feel angry, irritated, or have a lot of emotions towards others, we can easily feel nervous, worried about being seen by others, or even worried that others will discover and retaliate, punish, or attack us as a result. At this time, we often feel that the relationships around us are insecure, or even full of hostility. When we suppress and don't allow these emotions to be felt and expressed, we will feel very uneasy.

As the questioner wrote, some factors that make me feel uncomfortable, or people and things that make me feel insecure, or a place that makes me feel insecure, I will feel very uneasy, very scared, very strongly, always around me.

We can and should objectively evaluate ourselves, record our strengths and weaknesses, praise our strengths, and accept our shortcomings.

As the psychological master Adler said, past life experiences are not of much use to us. What is decisive is the perception and meaning we attach to them.

Let's talk about emotions again. Emotions are composed of unique subjective experiences, external manifestations, and physiological arousal. Each emotion may be the result of an unmet internal desire. When we miss the opportunity for a promotion or pay rise, we feel sad; when we lose a treasured possession we have had for many years, we feel angry.

As the original poster wrote, we always feel guilty about our thoughts. We are easily affected by mood swings over a trivial matter. We get scared for no reason. We panic for no reason. We easily get distracted and get lost in sadness.

Ask yourself: What do you think about bad experiences and embarrassing moments from the past? What emotions and feelings does it bring up?

We must ask ourselves: what needs in our hearts are being met by our tendency to blow things out of proportion and make a mountain out of a molehill? What needs in our hearts are being met by our tendency to consider our thoughts sinful?

We must ask ourselves: what is the need inside us when we fall into self-criticism and can't help crying?

We must also ask ourselves: What is the ideal self? What are the ideal interpersonal relationships?

We must ask ourselves, what can we do for ourselves?

We can and should ask ourselves, "If the anxious and fearful feelings at this moment could speak, what would they tell us?"

It is important to understand that emotions themselves are neither good nor bad. When we become aware of uncomfortable emotions, we can and should ask ourselves, "What am I worried about? What does this remind me of?"

When we accept our emotions and let them flow, we avoid developing distorted behaviors due to emotional repression. We can also try writing therapy, writing and drawing out our feelings to find an outlet and release them.

Sing out in a rock rhythm. Release pent-up emotions.

Use an empty chair, role-play, and self-dialogue to create a safe situation and atmosphere. Connect past events with your current state of mind and consciously integrate chaotic thoughts so that negative emotions can be released.

Love yourself.

It's clear that negative emotions impact your life. You can seek help. Since this is troubling you, it's not easy to overcome it immediately. Find a family member or friend you trust and who has always given you positive support to talk to. If you feel the need, find a counselor. Expressing emotions relieves the heaviness and blockage in our hearts.

We also try to learn to love ourselves, starting by treating our bodies well. We know we have grown up, that we have the strength and ability to protect ourselves, that we can affirm and satisfy our own needs, that we can express and communicate our own thoughts, and that we can accept and appreciate our imperfect selves. Other people's opinions are just a minor incident. We learn to look within, hug our inner child, and become our own inner parent. When our core is stable, we will find the eye of life for ourselves, as well as the eye of love, and of course the eye of living a happy life.

Read this book: Embrace Your Inner Child.

Hello! I really hope my answer can be of some help to you.

From what you've told me, it seems like you have a lot of emotions that need to be released inside you, rather than continuing to build up and suppress them. It's also clear that you lack a sense of security inside yourself, and we need to find ways to build up a sense of security inside you. In addition, we can also understand ourselves by reviewing our early experiences, understand why we are the way we are, and grow ourselves on the basis of accepting ourselves.

I really want to help you, so here's my advice:

It's okay, it's not your fault! You didn't encounter a stable and constant object when you were a child, and that's okay. We all need to understand ourselves, and you are doing that now.

It's totally normal to wonder how you were cared for before you were one year old. We all have different experiences growing up, and it's natural to have different memories of how our parents met our needs. Did your parents always give you what you needed, or did they sometimes forget to give you what you wanted, like a hug or a diaper change? It's not your fault if you feel like you don't have a sense of security. It's just because you didn't have a stable and constant object that gave you a sense of security in your early experiences.

So, it's not your fault, and neither is it your parents'. We all grow up with some deficiencies. What has happened in the past is in the past, and there's no changing it. What we need to do is understand ourselves deeply by understanding our early experiences and see why we are the way we are now. When we see, accept, and understand, change will happen.

2. When you accept yourself, you're on the path to growth and improvement. You'll also establish an internally stable and constant object, which will give you a stable sense of security.

The past is a part of us, and it's so important to accept the impact of past experiences on ourselves. Only when we accept ourselves can we grow and develop ourselves better. Even though we haven't encountered a stable and constant external object, that doesn't mean we can't establish an inner sense of security. There are still so many ways to help us establish an inner sense of security, and an inner sense of security is the source of our sense of security in all relationships and in various environments.

We can help ourselves to establish a sense of inner security in so many ways! For example, finding a good enough psychological counselor who matches you, being re-parented in the relationship, establishing a new relationship model, and gaining a sense of stable security. You can also join a supportive group, where the unconditional acceptance of the group members, their tolerance, understanding and acceptance of you, their trust, encouragement and support, can all be internalized as your sense of security. And the luckiest thing is that our inner self is actually complete and self-sufficient. We can give ourselves enough acceptance, understanding, trust, recognition and care. When you can learn to be your own inner parent, you expect what your parents give you, and you give yourself what you expect. When you become a person who cares enough, respects, accepts, recognizes, supports and loves yourself, you also establish an inner stable and constant object, which is the beginning of your independence.

3. Try to release your emotions in a healthy way. Don't suppress them, let them out!

I know it can feel like there are so many emotions inside you that need to be channeled and transformed. Those emotions that you have suppressed are actually always there, but you can let them out! If we don't clear them up, they won't go away, and they will just explode when they accumulate to a certain level.

It's so important to find the right person to talk to. Talking has a very good healing effect. You can find a professional such as a listener or counselor, or a friend who can give you support and understanding. It's all fine! You can also develop the habit of writing for healing. This often helps you express your inner feelings and emotions in writing, which can help you feel more relaxed. Another great way to release depression and anger is through exercise. Mindfulness meditation is another wonderful way to connect with your inner self. This can help you gain relaxation and tranquility, as well as improve brain function, enhance the function of the prefrontal lobe, make us more intelligent, and our emotions more stable and peaceful.

I hope this is helpful for you! Sending you lots of love and best wishes!

Dear Landlord, I came across your description and hope that my input can provide some inspiration and assistance.

As you stated in the article, it is not possible to control one's emotions. When one is feeling depressed, it is common to engage in crying or other forms of self-expression.

It is a universal experience to have emotions, yet there is a diversity of perspectives on how to manage them.

It is often beneficial to release pent-up emotions.

It should be noted that the aforementioned discovery does not entail seeking confrontation with another individual or discharging negative emotions upon them.

It is essential to find an alternative means of expressing these emotions.

To illustrate,

When experiencing a depressive or negative mood, it is possible to gradually transform these emotions into a source of motivation. One potential approach is to engage in physical activity such as running.

It is possible to transform feelings of depression into motivation by engaging in physical activity such as running.

It is also beneficial to discuss recent experiences with a trusted colleague or friend.

It may be the case that those directly involved are unable to see the situation clearly, whereas an external observer may be better placed to do so.

It is possible that he may perceive the situation from a different standpoint.

It is also important to find someone with whom you can discuss your concerns. Often, the reason we suppress our emotions is because we have not yet identified the appropriate individual with whom to share them. Once we have identified this person, we can discuss our emotional issues with them and may even receive guidance on how to address them.

If necessary, you may also wish to seek advice from a professional counselor. They are qualified to provide guidance on these matters.

Please consider these thoughts.

I'm so sorry you're going through a rough time. It's totally normal to feel overwhelmed by your emotions. The good news is that there are lots of ways to help you cope with these feelings. Here are some ideas that might help:

1. Cognitive restructuring: It can be really helpful to try to change the way you think about things and the way you think. When you have negative thoughts, challenge your thinking and ask yourself if there are other possible explanations or perspectives.

It's so important to learn to view things in a more positive and rational way. This can really help to reduce those emotional overreactions!

2. Emotion Management Techniques: Learn and practice some lovely, soothing emotion management techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, exercise, or relaxation exercises. These techniques can help you calm down when you are emotional and reduce physical tension and anxiety.

3. Self-acceptance: It's so important to accept your sensitivity and insecurity as part of who you are. We all have our own unique characteristics and emotional patterns, so don't be too hard on yourself!

It's so important to try to make peace with your emotions rather than fight against them.

4. Seek support: Share your feelings with friends, family, or someone you trust. They're there for you, and they'll be happy to provide emotional support and understanding, as well as practical advice and help.

5. Professional Help: If you're struggling with emotional issues that are affecting your life and studies, it's okay to seek help. There are lots of wonderful, supportive professionals out there who can help you understand your emotions better and learn some great coping strategies.

6. Nurture your body and mind with a healthy lifestyle! Make sure you're eating well, getting enough sleep, and moving your body in a way that feels good. Your body and mind are connected, so it's important to take care of both!

7. Practice positive self-care: Treat yourself like a good friend! Show yourself the same care, tolerance, and encouragement you would show a friend. Try some self-care activities you enjoy, like taking a hot bath, watching a favorite movie, or doing something you love.

8. Face your fears gradually: You've got this! Take it one step at a time. Start with small things, gradually challenge yourself, and before you know it, you'll be facing your fears and insecurities like a champ!

9. Develop a hobby: It's so important to take care of yourself! Engaging in a hobby you enjoy can help you distract yourself, reduce the impact of negative emotions, and improve your mood and quality of life.

The most important thing is to give yourself time and patience. It'll take time to regulate your emotions, but you've got this!

You've got this! Every effort you make is a step forward. You can gradually find a way to live in peace with your emotions and lead a happy life.

Hello! I'm Fairy, and I don't drink. I'm happy to answer your questions.

Some say life is a process of constantly moving forward through confusion.

You think the present is the hardest time, but if you think about it,

You have already overcome many obstacles. Action helps you overcome confusion. Let's act together!

You seem to be experiencing anxiety and depression.

These problems can affect your daily life, including work, study, and relationships.

Here are some tips to help you cope:

Seek professional help. A psychologist or psychotherapist can help you understand your problems and provide effective treatments.

Tell your family and friends how you feel.

Relax. Try breathing exercises, meditation, or other techniques to reduce stress.

[Increase exercise]: Exercise helps mood and anxiety. Do 30 minutes of aerobic exercise daily, like walking, running, or swimming.

Get enough sleep and stick to a routine to regulate your mood.

Learn to recognize negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones.

[Stay positive]: Focus on the good things.

Join a support group to help you face and overcome emotional problems.

Asking for help is not weak. It's the first step to facing your problems.

I hope these tips help. Get well soon!

Hello, I'm Yang Yiqing, a psychological counselor at One Psychological.

I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts and feelings with me. I understand how you feel, and I want you to know that I value your experience and every detail you've shared.

You mentioned some of the challenges you are experiencing, including infinite amplification and catastrophic thinking, sensitivity and insecurity, and a strong sense of fear. It's possible that these feelings may have their roots in your past experiences, your personality traits, or how you perceive yourself and the world around you.

It might be helpful to remember that these feelings can be improved with some methods and strategies. As you mentioned, finding someone to rely on can be a good way to do it. It can be beneficial to remember that you are not alone and that being strong is important, but it's also important to recognize that you are not the only person who can help yourself.

It would be beneficial for you to learn how to identify your own resources and learn to use them effectively, rather than becoming overly reliant on them. Regardless of the method you choose to employ, it is important to remember that you must be the one to get through it and maintain your stability.

1. Dealing with magnification and catastrophizing

You mentioned feeling guilty about your thoughts and being prone to self-criticism and pessimism. This way of thinking is known in psychology as "cognitive distortion."

It's not uncommon for us to unconsciously adopt these distorted thinking patterns when we're faced with challenges. Identifying and challenging these thoughts can be an important first step in changing them.

When you find yourself starting to amplify or catastrophize, you might like to ask yourself, "Is this thought based on facts? Is there a more balanced, realistic way to look at this?"

"

2. Sensitivity and insecurity

You might find it helpful to try practicing self-acceptance and empathy as a way of dealing with sensitivity and insecurity. It could be beneficial to say to yourself, "Yes, I feel insecure now, and these are my feelings, and I have the right to feel this way."

It might be helpful to explore the deeper reasons behind these feelings. At the same time, it could be beneficial to look for things and environments that give you a sense of security, and to spend more time in these environments.

3. Coping with fear and anxiety

It may be helpful to consider that fear and anxiety are often a manifestation of our inner uncertainty and sense of lack of control. In such cases, relaxation techniques and mindfulness exercises could be beneficial.

Mindfulness is a way of being in the present moment and accepting our current feelings and experiences. Many people have found that this can help reduce anxiety and fear.

You might find it helpful to spend some time each day practicing mindfulness meditation, as this can assist you in better managing these emotions.

4. Recommended reading

I would like to suggest The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle as a helpful resource for those seeking to reduce suffering and anxiety and cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness and calm by living in the present.

The Art of Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff offers a helpful approach to overcoming a critical inner voice by learning to be more gentle and understanding towards oneself.

I would like to suggest the book Feeling Better: Learning to Love Your Negative Emotions (original title: Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy) by David D. Burns. This book provides practical techniques to help you change negative thinking and thus improve your mood.

My friend, I believe your feelings are completely reasonable, and I want you to know you are not alone. I think it's fair to say we have all experienced challenges and difficulties to varying degrees.

I hope you can find a source of support you can rely on.

I am a listening therapist, Yang Yiqing. I believe that life presents challenges, but that every step is worth celebrating. I hope we can move forward together.

Please don't hesitate to talk to me if you'd like to.

Hello, questioner! I can tell you're feeling anxious and confused. Some people tend to magnify minor issues and have a tendency to think in catastrophic terms. There are a few reasons why this might be:

Psychological defense mechanisms: This way of thinking might be a psychological defense mechanism to distract attention from the real problem or challenge. By focusing on minor things and exaggerating their potential consequences, people may try to escape from a bigger and more difficult dilemma.

People who are chronically anxious or depressed are more likely to have this way of thinking. They may be afraid of the uncertainty of the future and therefore tend to see any small mishaps as potential disasters.

Past experiences can also play a big part in how we think. Things that happened to us when we were young can affect how we see things now. For example, if we were criticised or ignored when we were kids, we might think that any small mistake is a big deal. This is because we're trying to predict and control the bad things that might happen.

Cognitive biases: Certain cognitive biases, such as "catastrophizing" or "overgeneralizing," can also make people focus on minor problems to an extreme. This way of thinking may prevent people from looking at problems objectively and instead focus excessively on their potential negative consequences.

It's important to know that this kind of thinking isn't healthy. It can lead to excessive worry, fear, and anxiety that get in the way of daily life and work. If you find yourself constantly caught in this way of thinking, professional psychological counseling or therapy might be a good solution.

By learning healthier ways to cope and think, they can slowly change this unhealthy habit and lead a calmer, more confident life.

Also, feelings of insecurity can come from a lot of different places, like past experiences, current stress, or concerns about the future. Here are some tips to help you deal with feelings of insecurity:

It's important to recognize and accept your feelings. First, be aware of and accept your insecurity. Don't try to escape or suppress these feelings, but face them and try to understand the reasons behind them.

2. Take some time to reflect on what's causing your insecurity. This might involve looking back at past experiences or examining your current situation.

Knowing what's really behind your insecurity can help you find ways to deal with it.

3. Get help: Talk to your friends, family, or a professional. They can give you different points of view and ideas to help you deal with insecurity.

4. Build a positive self-image: Boost your self-esteem and self-confidence. Focus on your strengths and achievements, not on your weaknesses and failures.

Boost your self-esteem with some positive self-talk.

5. Learn relaxation and stress-reduction techniques. Try some relaxation and stress-reduction activities like deep breathing, yoga, meditation, etc. These can help relieve tension and reduce insecurity.

6. Set realistic goals. Make sure they're clear and measurable, and work towards achieving them. You'll feel more confident and secure when you accomplish your goals.

7. Stay healthy! Get enough sleep, eat right, and exercise. These help you stay physically and mentally healthy, and they can help you feel less insecure.

If you're struggling with insecurity and it's affecting your quality of life, it might be time to reach out to a counselor. They can provide guidance and support to help you cope with your insecurities.

Everyone's situation is different, so it might take a little time and a few tries to find a solution that works for you. The important thing is to be patient and positive, and to believe that you can overcome your insecurities.

I hope my sharing can be helpful to you. I'm a listening therapist, Deng Hong. I'm here to listen to you with all my heart. Please feel free to talk to me.

It is recommended that when one experiences feelings of anxiety, one should engage in a brief walk. It is not necessary to travel a great distance; even a short distance can be beneficial. Similarly, when one feels frightened, it is helpful to wash one's face.

Any action, regardless of its magnitude, can contribute to the formation of a significant outcome.

It is my conviction that each challenge encountered will ultimately facilitate the advent of a more straightforward trajectory.

One may record on a sheet of paper the factors, both internal and external, that contribute to feelings of anxiety. Similarly, one may record on another sheet of paper the factors that contribute to feelings of fear.

On a third sheet of paper, record a personal achievement or accomplishment that evokes a sense of pride.

Anything that is detrimental to one's physical and mental well-being should be folded into paper airplanes and released.

Gradually release the plane to the furthest extent possible.

It is my hope that you will be able to relinquish your concerns and insecurities.

It is my sincere hope that you can perceive my enthusiasm and that you can continue to improve with each passing day.

It is a common experience to feel anxious, depressed, or insecure.

It is my hope that you are able to discern the emotional fluctuations within yourself.

One might inquire whether the subject in question experiences a sense of aimlessness or confusion.

It is advisable to avoid feelings of anxiety and depression.

Maintain a positive and optimistic outlook.

It is recommended that mindfulness be practiced on a daily basis.

One may choose to list one positive occurrence each day for a period of one year. It is recommended that this task be completed, as it may yield positive results.

Notwithstanding the prevailing opinion, I am convinced that you are capable of achieving this.

I encourage you to persevere. I extend a gesture of support and encouragement.

I am currently enrolled in middle school.

Good day. I empathize with your current distress. This situation is indeed unsettling. I fully understand the psychological pressure you are currently facing and your determination to seek change. Your emotional experiences and insecurities are truly heartbreaking.

The feelings you mentioned, such as a lack of security, over-amplification of things, and negative self-evaluation, are common challenges that many individuals may face during their personal and professional growth. It is important to note that these issues are not uncommon and are not necessarily indicative of a problem.

If you identify your most trusted sources of information and speak up with confidence, you will receive the optimal response. My recommendation is that you:

Firstly, it is important to understand the concept of safety in a relationship. Safety can be defined as a feeling of comfort, relaxation and freedom within the relationship.

If an individual has been raised in an environment that is characterized by insecurity and hostility, this may influence their perception and emotional response to relationships. In order to regain a sense of security, it may be necessary to reflect on and examine past experiences that have caused feelings of unease and fear.

Identify the root cause and work to develop more stable and healthy relationships, fostering closer connections with those who understand and support you.

Secondly, with regard to the issue of exaggeration, this may be linked to your cognitive processes. Psychological research indicates that individuals may occasionally fall into an automatic negative thinking pattern, leading to an overestimation of the severity of a situation and excessive self-criticism.

It is essential to learn to view your actions and thoughts in a rational manner, rather than allowing them to control you. Establishing a positive self-image and understanding that mistakes are an inherent part of the learning process is crucial for avoiding similar mistakes in the future.

It is also crucial to develop self-confidence, avoid undue influence from external opinions, and maintain an attitude of confidence in one's ability to overcome life's challenges. Additionally, mindfulness meditation can be an effective tool for achieving a state of calm and reducing unnecessary concerns.

As a result, you may wish to consider some cognitive behavioral therapy techniques, such as identifying and challenging these negative thinking patterns, and attempting to view your thoughts and actions in a more objective manner. Concurrently, it is advisable to remain calm and rational, and to refrain from immediately attributing blame to yourself or experiencing excessive self-loathing.

In terms of sensitivity and insecurity, this may be related to our emotional experience and emotional regulation ability. With regard to the over-amplification and catastrophic thoughts you mentioned, this is a manifestation of excessive self-criticism and anxiety.

It is essential to learn to view your actions and thoughts in a rational manner, rather than allowing them to control you. It is crucial to develop accurate self-awareness, recognize that everyone makes mistakes, and understand that the key is to learn from these mistakes and avoid repeating them.

It is also important to develop self-confidence. It is advisable to avoid paying excessive attention to the opinions of others and to believe in your ability to cope with the various challenges that life may present. At the same time, mindfulness meditation is an effective method of calming the mind and reducing unnecessary worry.

It would be beneficial to explore and understand these triggers in order to learn to respond more consciously when similar situations arise. At the same time, establishing a stable base of security, such as finding people, environments, or activities you can trust, can help relieve feelings of unease and fear.

Additionally, you may wish to consider meditation exercises or artistic creation activities as a means of providing a constructive outlet for your emotions.

Finally, modifying one's own thinking patterns and emotional regulation skills requires time and effort. It is recommended that you seek the assistance of a professional counselor, who can provide more targeted guidance and tools to help you reshape your perceptions and improve your emotional regulation skills.

Furthermore, allow yourself the time and space to adapt and change. Each moment of self-awareness and growth represents a solid step towards a happy life.

I hope the above suggestions are helpful. Should you have any further questions or require additional assistance, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Let's proceed.

In regard to the sensitivity and insecurity you have outlined, it is possible that these issues may have their roots in fears and insecurities that originated during your childhood or adolescent years. It would be beneficial to engage in open communication with family members or friends about your feelings and concerns, so that they can gain a deeper understanding of your situation and provide you with the necessary support.

Additionally, professional psychological counseling may be a beneficial avenue for addressing these issues more effectively.

I hope the above suggestions will prove beneficial to you.

Dear child (I hope you don't mind me calling you that!), how are you doing?

As an older aunt, when I see you in your prime, I can't help but take a second look at the confusion and problems you encounter. I always hope that you can enjoy the freedom and joy of this age, my dear.

Reading your thoughtful and well-organized description, I was once again torn about whether to share my thoughts with you, as I'm not very knowledgeable in this area. But I read to the end and saw your struggle. I was even more moved by your resilience and your determination to heal yourself. So, I started writing this down to let you know that, like the other brothers and sisters who have responded to you, like this platform, we see you, we love you, and we hope that you will continue to have the courage to get out of this difficult situation.

I really think that if you can, it's a great idea to get some help from a professional counselor. They'll be able to help you understand what's going on and use a more professional and systematic method (like cognitive behavioral therapy) to help you adjust more quickly.

I've also found some practices that have really helped me over the years to find emotional stability. I'd love to share them with you if you're interested:

It's so important to talk about it! When I'm feeling really emotional, I often chat to my friends and family or write it all down. It's a great way to let out all those feelings and sort them out. Sometimes I even have little epiphanies and find ways to deal with them myself.

Meditation: There are so many wonderful meditations on the platform! You can practice them "according to the symptoms" when you're feeling emotional, or you can do them every day.

I'll leave it to you to discover all the amazing benefits of meditation!

Hey there! We're here to help you learn and grow. Our platform's official account has lots of great articles that you can read to see if you're in a similar situation. Then, you can choose the solutions that work best for you. There are also lots of great lectures you can watch or listen to. Last week, we had a fantastic one by teacher Zhou Fan on the platform about the inner child and psychological nutrition, as well as a very inspiring happy psychology class at Capital Normal University. You can also read some great psychological books, such as "It's Not Your Fault," "The Courage to Be Disliked," "Meeting the Unknown Self," and "Mr. Toad Goes to the Psychologist."

And finally, I just want to say that dealing with emotions is something we all have to do for the rest of our lives. It's not something you can achieve overnight, so please don't rush. Take things one step at a time and be patient with yourself. I wish you all the best as you say goodbye to panic and sensitivity, and hello to abundance and security.

Hello, my dear friend! I'm Super Sister from Yixinli.

Focus on your goal: you want to live a happy life and become happier! If you want it enough, you will get it sooner or later. I believe in you! ?

You say that you often feel an inexplicable sense of guilt, and that you don't think it's good to feel this way. This may be due to the high standards and strict requirements you have within yourself, as well as your feeling that you are prone to panic and being sensitive. All of this may be related to your past experiences. So whatever you do now and whatever experiences you create will be different for you in the future. I'm here to help! Here are some suggestions:

1. Self-acceptance and the permission to make mistakes

It's so important to understand and accept that everyone has negative emotions and thoughts. It's all part of being human! And you don't need to be too hard on yourself. Give yourself permission to make mistakes and allow yourself to grow and change.

2. Self-adjustment and active experimentation

Take a deep breath and try to relax. Distract yourself with some meditation or yoga. This will help you avoid becoming too overwhelmed by your fear.

It's so important to look after yourself! Making sure you have a regular routine, eat a balanced diet and exercise moderately can really help to relieve psychological stress.

Why not find out where the nearest park to your home is right now and go for a lovely walk when you want to feel happy and content? What do you love most about the park?

3. Restructure your thinking

If you find yourself feeling guilty for no good reason, like you have to be perfect all the time or that you're a terrible person for making a tiny mistake, it might be time to challenge those beliefs. Try to adopt a more positive and tolerant outlook instead.

We highly recommend keeping a diary to record your feelings and thoughts every day. It's also a great idea to read "Get through it, and you will become a better version of yourself," which provides a detailed introduction to the ABC emotional theory. Once you've used this template to write in your diary, you'll be able to see the real reasons behind your emotions.

4. Get some help!

It can be so helpful to talk to your friends and family about your worries. They'll understand and encourage you in ways you might not expect.

If you're going through something serious and it's been going on for a while, it might be helpful to chat with a professional counselor. They can help you figure out what's going on underneath it all and come up with ways to cope that really work for you.

No matter what happens, remember to take care of yourself and show yourself love. You deserve it!

Let's all try to become braver and braver, and live the way we want to!

I feel your pain and confusion. I hug you.

You know you overthink and want to change. That's courageous. You're great! You also said, "A small thing can make me feel very emotional and affected."

You might be overgeneralizing. Catastrophizing and generalizing are cognitive distortions.

Many people have been through this, including me. I know how it feels, so I hope I can help you.

Catastrophizing is when you think something will be worse than it will be. The next time you notice it, think about whether you're being too negative.

Overgeneralization means making a generalization about everything. When something doesn't go the way we want, we can fall into learned helplessness, thinking we can't change things.

My usual method for dealing with overgeneralizations is to cite a counterexample. You say, "A small thing can make you feel very emotional." First, it is that small thing that can make you feel very emotional, not everything. Second, it is that small thing that can make you feel very emotional at that moment, not always.

If you still find it hard, tell yourself you'll do better next time.

I've been through this for two years, and I know it's tough. I want to give you a hug. First, know that your feelings are real and normal. Your sensitivity helps you perceive your state and the world around you.

Second, see a counselor. They can help you feel safe, understand you better, help you explore yourself, and give you advice. I was able to use my sensitivity to find security with the help of a counselor.

You also said you feel scared when you're alone. This is probably because you're insecure. I wonder if you were abandoned or neglected as a child.

Hug the lonely you more often. How do we overcome this fear of being alone?

Start with one hour and gradually increase the time.

☘️ Remind yourself you're safe.

They'll be back.

Find something you like and keep learning.

☘️Face your loneliness.

☘️Take care of yourself.

Recommended books: Self-Care, The Courage to Be Happy, and Live Your Most Optimistic Self.

I hope this helps! I'm Qingti, and have a happy day!

Hello, I'm Xiaoying. I'm lucky to answer your questions.

I admire you for struggling with these negative emotions for so long.

Maybe it's because you notice things more and are more emotional. Things that others don't notice can affect you and cause problems.

This is torment for you.

You're sensitive, insecure, scared, and cry easily. You also seem lonely.

You're trying to move in a better direction, but you don't have anyone to walk with you. What do you think about the idea of companionship?

Everyone feels this way to some extent. If you have someone to talk to, it can help. Most people do this to feel better.

You feel pressure, especially from yourself.

You know you're in a bad place, so you try to get back to a "normal" state, but you can't accept your negative emotions.

You're under a lot of pressure. These emotions and feelings didn't come out of nowhere. They may be linked to something you've ignored or something that's happened to you. Looking at what's causing these feelings and exploring them will help you understand yourself better.

I hope this helps.

Dear Sir/Madam, I empathize with the emotional distress and insecurity you describe. Each of your feelings is genuine and serves as a form of internal communication.

These issues may have a variety of underlying causes, including anxiety, low self-esteem, and excessive thinking.

The following suggestions may prove beneficial:

1. It is advisable to seek support from a suitable source, whether it be a loved one, friend, counselor, or other professional. It is beneficial to share one's feelings and concerns with this individual, who can provide understanding, comfort, and advice. It is also helpful to identify tools that are effective in managing emotions, such as writing, drawing, music, sports, and other activities.

2. Acceptance of Self: It is important to accept one's emotions and thought patterns, and to avoid excessive self-blame. It is essential to recognize that everyone experiences different emotions and has varying degrees of vulnerability; the key is to learn effective strategies for coping with and managing these experiences.

3. Alter your cognitive framework. Be conscious of your responses to your own thought processes and inquire of yourself whether this is truly the case. Attempt to discern the origin of these thoughts, consider alternative perspectives, and identify the constructive aspects.

Fourthly, it is recommended that individuals learn relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation. These techniques have been demonstrated to effectively alleviate anxiety and fear, thereby enhancing emotional stability.

5. Develop habits: It is advisable to pay attention to good sleeping, eating, and exercising habits, as these can improve physical and mental health and enhance emotional stability.

6. Seek assistance from a qualified mental health professional. If one is unable to cope with emotional distress, it is advisable to seek guidance from a professional counselor or psychologist, who can provide more specific and personalized advice and treatment options.

The following books are recommended for further reading: 1. Stop Your Inner War 2. Mr. Toad Goes to Therapy

It is a fallacy to believe that emotional problems manifest instantaneously. Rather, they evolve gradually, and with the application of positive efforts and appropriate support, it is possible to achieve a marked improvement in one's emotional state and to adopt a more positive and happy lifestyle.

I extend my affection and best wishes to the world and to you.

Hello, question asker! I can see the confusion you are facing right now, but I'm here to help! Hugs to you!

You said in your question that you lack a sense of security, which is something we can definitely work on together!

This can usually be traced back to your infancy and a relationship with your mother. And that's something you can change!

It's totally possible that at that time, your mother didn't respond to your needs in time every time you cried.

As a result, ever since then, you have felt unsafe in the whole world. But now you know how to change it!

And the fact that you came here to the platform to ask a question today shows that you are someone who wants to change themselves, which is a great start!

There's a great saying in psychology: "Seeing is healing."

And the great news is that self-awareness is often the beginning of healing!

So the next time you feel insecure, think of it as your inner child coming out to play!

But the current self is different from the child self, which is great!

For example, you are taller and stronger than you were as a child; you are also more powerful inside!

Now that you're an adult, you can give yourself a sense of security!

If you think it would help, I'd love for you to seek help from a professional counselor!

A counselor can help you better deal with the "inner child" part, and it's a great idea to get help if you need it!

If you're interested, I highly recommend reading Embracing Your Inner Child!

And guess what? Your negative emotions also need to be dealt with.

But here's the good news: if you do deal with them, they'll be gone!

So, how do you deal with your negative emotions?

I highly recommend that you exercise for at least half an hour every day if you can!

When we exercise, our bodies produce endorphins and dopamine, which makes us feel happier!

Of course, the next time you notice a negative emotion, you can try doing some topic separation!

And guess what? You can even look at who caused all those bad emotions!

And the best part is, we are only responsible for our own emotions!

And that's a good thing! After all, other people's emotions are not something we can control.

If you can, it's a great idea to start keeping an emotional diary!

And the best part is, when you write more, you may even discover a pattern!

For example, if your bad mood is caused by something, then you can take some measures in time to prevent them from recurring next time. And you can do this!

If you need a little extra help, it's a great idea to seek the support of a professional, like a counselor.

She is a professional and can help you in so many ways!

There are also lots of great online mutual support groups you can join!

I highly recommend that you join them!

In mutual aid groups, you will find people who have similar experiences to you, and they can give you the support and help you need!

I highly recommend you read the book, The Power of Self-Care.

I really, really hope that you can solve your problem soon!

Now, all I can think of is the above!

I really hope my answer is helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner! I'm the answerer, and I study hard every day.

Here at Yixinli, the world and I love you! Best wishes!

I'm so excited to see what the future holds for you!

Hello, I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you. From what you've said, it's clear that you're going through a rough patch. It's important to take care of yourself, especially when you're feeling low. I can sense your unique loneliness. You've been facing it by taking care of yourself, which is really not easy. I hope my words can bring you a little warmth.

I always like to blow something up and make it seem catastrophic. When I think about something, I blow it up and make it seem catastrophic. I can see that when you are facing this thing, it is really not easy to accomplish. When people want to refuse something and accomplish it, they can't see the motivation and can't take action. This is also very normal. You see that your own strength is really too small, and you hope that someone can help you. You especially hope that someone around you can pay attention to you. Maybe your mentality and state will be much better. From what I can see, you are thinking of many ways to take care of yourself, because you know that you have to rely on yourself a lot of the time, but another voice tells you that you are not willing to give up, and you hope that someone can care about you, take care of you, understand you, and stay with you. But you know that it is not easy to get these things, and is this warmth really so difficult to come by?

From what you've shared, it seems like you've found a helpful resource on this platform. Kudos to you for spotting a potential solution and for seeking warmth, support, and attention on this platform. Keep up the great work!