Hello, question asker! I just wanted to say that I'm here for you.
After reading the questioner's words, I feel like giving them a hug.
We're all still learning the ropes when it comes to being kids, and our parents are also new to the role of parents. They might not have all the answers when it comes to what makes a good parent, so it can seem like they're not doing a great job of taking care of their kids.
It seems like the OP might not feel loved by his parents.
But from what the OP says, it seems like their parents still care about them. Otherwise, why would they have spent money to send the OP to school and try to find a job for them? I know some classmates who dropped out of high school without finishing, but at least their parents tried to help them.
Their generation may be more conservative at heart, and they feel that having a job means having a foundation. They don't know what kind of job is considered a good job, so they can only take the most misguided approach and listen to what other people say. But the questioner knows what kind of job is not a good job.
So, there's a difference of opinion because you see things differently.
Given all this, I don't want the question asker to blindly obey their parents. I just want them to understand that their parents may not be as bad as they think.
We can affirm our parents' love without necessarily having to affirm the way they love us.
I think that being in a repressive environment for a long time is not good for your mental health. It's not impossible that a moderate distance creates beauty. The questioner can think about this approach.
You might want to try to find a job first and then tell your parents about your plans and intentions. If they know you have plans and a place to go, they may not be so opposed. I think the questioner said that because they hadn't found a job after graduation, their parents asked someone to find a connection and give a red envelope to secure a position.
It seems like the parents don't love the questioner, but maybe they just used the wrong method.
My mother also said I was dark and ugly when I was young. In our culture, we tend to be humble and conservative, used to suppressing and lecturing, and not used to expressing love verbally. This makes it difficult for us to be affirmed by our parents.
I think the best thing for the questioner to do is to ignore the emotional expressions of their parents.
Just to give you some context!


Comments
I can't imagine how tough it must have been growing up feeling neglected and misunderstood by my own parents. It's heartbreaking that they didn't provide the support you needed during school or when you faced mental health challenges. It seems like their actions only added to your struggles, making everything more difficult than it already was.
It sounds like you've been through an incredibly hard time with your parents not just failing to support you but also undermining your confidence and wellbeing. The job situation they arranged for you seemed exploitative, and it's upsetting that they blamed you for quitting a job that was clearly detrimental to your health. You deserve better treatment and respect from them.
Facing such criticism and lack of understanding from family must be really disheartening. It's important to remember that you're not alone in these feelings, and it's okay to seek out a supportive network outside of your immediate family. What happened with the sales job and now with this receptionist position shows a pattern of them trying to control your life without considering what's best for you.