What to do when gender-based thinking differences lead to communication breakdowns?

Good day.

I have taken the time to read through your question. It seems to me that this communication issue may have a number of contributing factors, including differing perspectives on the situation and varying emotional responses to the house.

Initially, communication was somewhat challenging, but with your efforts, you were able to achieve your goal, which I believe was an effective approach.

You felt that your husband was not fully supportive of your emotional needs because you were crying. This led to a compromise where you agreed to "ditch" the house and he agreed to "open the passage" for you. I believe this was an effective way to communicate your needs.

In this situation, it seems that there are differing emotional views on the house between you and your husband. The contract for the Hong Kong house has now expired.

Your husband has a logical perspective on the situation and believes that selling the Hong Kong house at a high price would potentially increase the income a little. Men tend to be more rational, but it's important to acknowledge that your husband has never lived there and may not have the same emotional attachment to the house as you do.

I can understand why you feel so strongly about the house. It's not just a matter of "just a house."

If that house is sold, it might be perceived as a severing of a 13-year emotional bond, which could be seen as a loss of a remaining connection to one's mother.

It is understandable that you feel a deep sadness at the thought of losing the bond with your mother and the memories of your youth. It is natural to feel this way when we experience sadness.

When you and your husband are unable to communicate effectively, you express your feelings by crying. I can see how sad you are about losing your youth and your bond with your mother.

It's not uncommon for expressing dissatisfaction with others to come from a place of anger. However, your expression also encompasses sadness. It might be helpful to reflect on your own feelings and identify if there are other emotions present beyond anger and dissatisfaction.

You mentioned that your crying makes you feel like you're in a "childhood state." I can see how that could be a positive feeling. Being in an intimate relationship often means taking on different roles, such as that of a parent or child.

When you are a child, he is the parent, and he accommodates you. When you are a parent, you accommodate him.

This is precisely what our intimate relationship allows us to do. It is only when we are both parents and children that conflicts and contradictions may arise.

It is important to remember that regardless of the form of communication or the process involved, as long as the desired outcome is achieved, the communication can be considered smooth. Given that the desired outcome has already been reached, it seems that your husband has been willing to compromise.

He saw and understood your tears. It seems that you two are emotionally connected, and crying may express that much more than words.

Crying can be a more direct, effective, and powerful way to communicate than words. Therefore, your way of communicating is not bad at all, and it can be retained.

It is not important whether this is perceived as a "childish state." What is important is that your husband accepts your state and that communication can be "communicated." This is a good way of communicating and can be chosen as a way of communication to be retained.

I hope the world and I can show you our love.

Men and women think differently for a reason. Biology and genetics play a role, as do the environments and experiences that shape us. It's not surprising that men and women have different personalities and ways of thinking. The same is true within families, where people of the same gender often have distinct approaches.

This is a perfectly normal situation that most people will face and accept calmly. Otherwise, why are there men and women?

This is acceptable, but the questioner's inner problems still need attention. The house is the questioner's emotional attachment to his mother, but it is also necessary to first consider the current couple and family. After all, this is the questioner's current life support. This does not mean that the emotional attachment to his mother is unimportant. The questioner needs to calmly tell her husband about this importance, rather than expressing it through crying.

Crying will only make your husband misunderstand. He won't know what's going on and will be very annoyed, which will affect the relationship between the couple. From the way the husband reacted, as described by the questioner, he cares about the questioner very much and can't bear to see her suffer. Then the questioner can tell her husband how she feels, so that he knows that this is why the questioner wants to keep the house. He will understand and support the questioner.

You don't have to sell the house. You can find a balanced point of view between the two of you that preserves the house and doesn't make the question owner couple worry about the maintenance of the house. They can rent it out, etc., and discuss it slowly.

However, I strongly believe that the questioner is unable to let go of her feelings for her mother, and some knots have not been untied. I advise you to find a suitable psychological counselor on a platform to do formal psychological counseling, which I believe will be helpful. The above are my personal opinions for the questioner's reference only.

Hello, I'm Zeyu.

"What should I do when there's a lack of communication because of differences in how men and women think?" In response to Teacher Tian Tian's confusion, let's try to look at the problem from a new perspective.

Let's take a look at this sentence: "The differences in men's and women's thinking lead to a lack of communication." We're not saying that this isn't true, but we believe the problem stems from our own choices. Put simply, we think this way because we feel deep down that the differences in men's and women's thinking make effective communication impossible, which in turn causes problems in communication between each other.

If we look at what happened from an outsider's perspective, we'll see that my husband's position is purely rational. The other person ignored our inner emotions and the need to be seen and cared for. They just gave advice and ignored our inner emotions. Is this the other person's fault? Clearly not. So is this our problem?

Are we being sentimental or weak? Absolutely not. We have strong feelings about this house that the other person just doesn't get. So, this isn't a communication issue, it's a perspective thing.

Of course, emotional thinking and rational thinking can intersect. They can both be aware of objective facts and truths, but emotional thinking doesn't focus on this aspect, while rational thinking ignores emotions other than the truth.

In this situation, we can try to share our inner feelings and emotions with the other person. The purpose of this is not to prove anything to the other person, but rather to show them what emotional thinking is like and what parts we care about, so that they can feel and try to understand this.

We can also try to put ourselves in the other person's shoes and think about what happened. We can try to understand that they meant well and were trying to help us. Then we can forgive them and try to see the event in a different way.

Hello. I know this is a tough call for you. The house in Hong Kong is a big deal.

When your husband said this was a minor issue, it struck a chord, making you feel frustrated and angry. You especially need understanding and support right now, so his comment may have made you feel even more that your feelings aren't being seen or even dismissed.

It might seem like you and your husband have had communication problems because of your different ways of thinking. But if you look back at the whole process, you'll see that the emotional flow between you has been very real and smooth. First of all, your husband noticed that you were under a lot of stress, so he opened up the topic to discuss it with you.

He noticed your emotions before you even said anything, which shows he cares about you and is willing to support you.

Secondly, when you didn't know how to communicate with him and expressed your dissatisfaction by crying, your husband saw how upset you were and made compromises, prioritizing your feelings. This shows that you can be true to yourself and express your inner grievances in front of your husband, and that your husband can also respond immediately. You have a very close emotional connection.

When there are disagreements or conflicts in an intimate relationship, it's more important to talk about emotions than logic. Your husband tends to think rationally, but he respects your sensibility, and you have sufficient emotional communication.

It seems like you also want to consider his logical side and do a good job of the "reason" part of the communication. You can do this gradually after the emotions have calmed down.

You see your Hong Kong home as more than just a place to live and an asset. It's also a place with memories of your youth and a connection to your family. This deep emotion is only understood by the person involved. To make others understand it, you really need to share it. You can tell your husband stories about your home in Hong Kong. You can talk about what that home meant to you from elementary school to university. You can also talk about what emotions flow through your heart when you think of it now. Of course, you have also done a lot of rational thinking yourself. You've thought about how to deal with the house from an economic point of view to reduce waste. After sharing this idea with your husband, he should also be able to see that you have carefully considered the plan from different levels. He will also understand your stress a little more.

Hi, I'm June.

This is a pretty common situation, and something many people can relate to. The differences in how men and women think can lead to communication difficulties and misunderstandings. In your story, you talk about how you feel about the house, and your husband's more logical take on it.

This can make it tough to communicate effectively, as you might both have trouble understanding each other's perspective.

From a psychological standpoint, the differences in how men and women think can lead to communication breakdowns in the following ways:

First, generally speaking, the connections in men's brains are more concentrated within the cerebral hemispheres, which may make them more inclined to logical, rational, and focused thinking. The connections in women's brains are more extensive between the cerebral hemispheres, which may give them an advantage in emotional perception and interpersonal relationship management. This difference may lead to different focuses and ways of understanding the same issue when communicating.

Second, men often focus more on the facts and the solution itself, and tend to give advice or solutions directly. Women, on the other hand, tend to pay more attention to emotions and details, and want to gain understanding and empathy first. This can lead to communication barriers when men are eager to solve problems and ignore women's emotional needs, or when women feel that men do not understand their feelings.

Once again, socio-cultural factors also have a big impact on how men and women think. Long-standing social expectations and gender roles affect the way men and women express themselves and deal with problems.

For instance, men are often taught to be strong and independent, and to keep their emotions in check. Women, on the other hand, are often encouraged to be more communicative and expressive. This difference can also lead to misunderstandings in communication.

On top of that, differences in cognitive style play a part. Men are more likely to think in a linear, analytical way, while women are more holistic and integrative.

This can lead to different ways of thinking and different priorities when discussing issues, which makes it difficult to reach a consensus.

You've been talking about how men and women think differently, but I don't think that's the main issue here. From what you've said, it seems like it's normal that you and your husband have different ideas about what to do with the house.

It's normal for couples to disagree sometimes. The key is finding ways to resolve these differences.

During the Wednesday evening conversation, you felt like you couldn't communicate with your husband, so you expressed your dissatisfaction by crying. This approach might not be the most effective way to communicate, as it could confuse and disorient your husband. Instead, you could try the following:

First, recognize your emotions and be aware that you may be in a "childish state," which means you may be particularly sensitive. Have important conversations when you're feeling calm and collected, so you can calm down and avoid emotional over-excitement, which will make communication even more difficult.

Then, when you're both feeling calmer, have another in-depth chat about your feelings and why they matter to you. Speak calmly and let your husband know what you need.

Once more, listen to what the other person has to say. Give your husband the chance to share his thoughts and opinions. Listen carefully to what he has to say and don't interrupt. See if you can find common ground and come to an agreement.

If you can't come to a complete agreement, you can try to find a compromise that's acceptable to both of you.

Since you've already agreed on how to handle the food in the fridge and the house, just go with that. You can also use this experience as a chance to think about how to handle similar issues better in the future.

This is a great chance to show your husband how you feel about the house.

First, tell him about the special moments and experiences you've had in the house. These stories will help him understand how important the house is to you.

Next, you need to connect emotionally and explain how the house is connected to your personal growth, family history, and emotional security. Let him know that it is not just a physical space, but also your emotional home.

If you can, use something he can relate to to show him how you feel about the house. Something he values might work well.

Then, share how you're feeling and use "I" statements to express your feelings, like "I feel sad because this house holds so many of my memories." This will help you avoid making accusations and focus more on your own feelings.

Next, talk about your experiences together. Ask him to go over the house with you, pointing out corners or objects that have special meaning for you so he can see what the house means to you.

It's also important to listen to his point of view and understand his position. When he's listened to and respected when expressing his views on the house, it'll encourage him to listen to your feelings as well.

Talk about your shared values and see if you can find a solution that respects your feelings and meets practical needs.

In short, it's important to maintain respect and understanding, and to avoid letting emotions dictate your actions. Couples need to support and understand each other to face the challenges of life together.

Have a great day!

Dear questioner, I can tell you're struggling with this and reluctant to admit that you and your husband aren't communicating well about the house. The house is more than just a place to live for you; it's also a part of your memories and emotions that you can't let go of.

I get it. I know why you're reluctant to let it go so easily.

First of all, I want to tell you that your feelings are totally valid. We all have something in our hearts that we really value. It might not seem that important to others, but it means a lot to us.

Your house is a place that holds memories of you and your mother, and those memories are invaluable.

I get where your husband's coming from, too. He might be more focused on the practical stuff, like how the house is run and used.

This isn't to say that he doesn't care about your feelings, but that his way of thinking is different from yours. It's not uncommon for there to be differences in how men and women think. It's not about who's right or wrong, but about learning to understand and communicate better.

So, how can we improve when faced with this kind of difference?

First, try to express your feelings in more specific and detailed language. You can tell your husband what the house means to you and what fond memories it brings.

You can also give him some examples to help him understand your feelings better.

Second, listen to your husband's thoughts and concerns. Don't jump in and interrupt or refute him right away. Let him finish his thought.

If we understand his position and concerns, we can find a solution together.

Then, try to find a balance. While it's important to preserve your precious memories, you also need to consider practical issues.

You can talk it over together to see if you can find a solution that meets your emotional needs and also solves the practical problems.

And finally, remember to respect and understand each other. We all have our own values and way of thinking, and we can't change each other, but we can learn to find common ground in our differences and build a harmonious relationship.

If you're having trouble communicating with your husband, try these tips:

1. Pick a good time and place: Find a time when you're both relaxed and not too busy, as well as a cozy spot to talk about this issue. For example, on a weekend afternoon, make a pot of tea, sit on the sofa, and chat slowly.

2. Express yourself using the word "I": When communicating, try to express your feelings and needs using the word "I" as much as possible, rather than blaming the other person. For example, you could say, "I feel that this house is important to me because it holds so many happy memories of me and my mother."

"Instead of saying, 'You don't understand what this house means to me!'"

3. Share specific stories and feelings: Talk to your husband about some of the good times and stories from when you lived in the house. This will help him understand why it's important to you. You could talk about funny things that happened when you were a kid, or the warm times you spent with your mom.

4. Brainstorm solutions: Talk with your husband about possible solutions. You could keep some important furniture and objects, or you could come up with a long-term plan for managing and using the house.

As you go through this process, try to respect each other's opinions and feelings. Work together to find a solution that is acceptable to both parties.

5. Get some professional help: If you feel like you can't solve the problem on your own, think about getting some professional advice or help. A professional counselor or family therapist can help you better understand and deal with the emotional differences and communication problems between you.

6. Give each other time and space: We all need time to process our emotions and feelings sometimes. If you feel emotional or unable to continue during the communication process, you can take a quick break and give each other some time and space to calm down and think.

7. Stay open and respectful: Try to stay open and respectful during the communication process. Respect each other's views and feelings. Don't try to change the other person, but find common ground in your differences and build a harmonious relationship.

8. Show your appreciation: Don't forget to thank your husband for his understanding and support during the communication process. Let him know how much you value your relationship.

Such expressions can really help to strengthen your relationship.

In short, communication is a process that requires time and patience. I believe that as long as you are willing to understand and respect each other, you will definitely be able to find a satisfactory solution.

You might face some challenges along the way, but remember that every conversation is an opportunity to learn and grow. I hope you can get through this rough patch with your husband and find your own way to happiness.

Stay strong!

That's a good question.

The differences in thinking between men and women undoubtedly lead to problems in daily communication between husbands and wives.

I'd like to share some thoughts with you for your reference.

It is normal for the differences in male and female thinking to occasionally cause communication issues. Men are typically more direct and concise, and they prefer to solve problems rather than listen.

For example, you described the details of "It's just a house, is it that difficult?" and "If you don't want to clean the house now, just leave it. You can go back at the beginning of next month and see what to do with the food in the fridge."

Women are more inclined to listen and express their emotions, and they prefer to solve problems through communication.

For example, the plot you described is clear: "It's like I've lost my connection to my mother," and "I have feelings and memories for the house."

Your analysis and judgment that "my husband is a male with rational thinking, and I am a female with emotional thinking when it comes to the house" is also accurate.

Men think logically and analyze problems. They are calm and rational, focus on practical solutions, and prefer to make quick decisions.

Women, on the other hand, think more comprehensively and pay more attention to emotional factors. They focus on emotional expression, consider multiple factors, and prioritize maintaining relationships.

There are also more complex and profound social, cultural, biological, and evolutionary reasons for the differences in thinking between men and women.

For example, there are differences in the structure of the brain and neurobiology between men and women.

The male brain is more involved in spatial perception and motor control, while the female brain is more involved in language and emotion processing.

Furthermore, men and women have played different roles in the evolutionary process.

Men are more likely to develop the ability to adapt to the physical environment and solve technical problems, while women are more inclined to develop the ability to adapt to social interactions and express emotions, etc.

Based on the above understanding, you should try the following methods to alleviate and reduce the difficulties in communication between husband and wife caused by the differences in thinking between men and women:

First and foremost, communication and understanding must be timely.

You can't just "cry to express my dissatisfaction." Couples must communicate honestly, understand each other's views and thoughts, and respect each other's differences in thinking.

You will find the right time and place to listen to and respect each other's views, which will effectively reduce conflicts.

Second, accept and tolerate the other person objectively.

You have already grasped the contrasts between men's and women's "rational and emotional" modes of thought. It is now essential to accept the divergences in thinking between men and women and to be tolerant of the other person's way of thinking.

You must accept and embrace each other's differences if you want to respect and understand each other's thoughts and actions in your daily lives.

Once again, find common ground.

You must identify the common ground in your thinking and behavior. For example, you may eventually agree that "you don't want to clean the house right now." Only by strengthening this common ground can it serve as a basis for communication and interaction.

You must find more common ground to work together to establish shared values and goals in your relationship and solve problems through cooperation and negotiation, not confrontation.

Seek help at the right time.

From what you have described, it is clear that your husband is still able to resolve problems through compromise in a timely manner.

If serious communication problems, conflicts, and arguments continue to occur in your relationship, you should seek professional help.

A counselor will provide you with professional, specific, and personalized guidance and help to solve your problems and improve your relationship.

We are confident that this will be of some help to you!

Hello. I can sense from the tone of your writing that you are experiencing some sadness and confusion regarding the communication methods that arise from differing perspectives between men and women. I extend my deepest sympathies to you and hope that my response will be of some assistance to you.

I can appreciate that the incident you mentioned about the house is currently a significant event for you. It is possible that understanding your current feelings is very complicated and sensitive. It is not just a place to live, but also a place that holds many precious memories from elementary school to university. This emotional attachment is very natural, and everyone has different levels of emotional investment in the objects in their lives, which makes them special to us.

From what you've shared, it seems that you're feeling frustrated and alone when your husband doesn't fully understand how you feel. It might be helpful to give you a hug again.

I would like to begin by reassuring you that your feelings are valuable and that you have the right to express your emotions and concerns. It is important to acknowledge your emotions in this process.

When communicating, it might be helpful to share your feelings and tell him what the house means to you and how much it means to you. You could say something like, "I know you may think it's just a house, but it's more than just four walls to me. It's where I grew up, and every corner is full of memories."

"

I would also encourage you to try to understand his position. It may be that he is not ignoring your feelings deliberately, but rather out of practical considerations or a desire to lighten your load.

Perhaps you could ask him why he made the suggestion and what the reasoning behind it is. This might help you to better understand his point of view and show him that you value his opinion.

Additionally, you might consider exploring whether there are other solutions that could potentially preserve what is important to you while also taking his ideas into account. For instance, you could think about whether there is any furniture or an object that could be kept as a reminder, or whether the house could be used as a place for family gatherings so that it becomes part of your shared memories.

It is not uncommon for communication to be challenging when there are differences in how men and women think, particularly when emotions, memories, and material possessions are involved. It is helpful to recognize that men and women may have different ways of expressing and dealing with emotions.

As you have described, it seems that men may be more inclined towards logic and problem-solving methods, while women may pay more attention to the emotional and relational aspects.

In addressing these challenges, we can collaboratively examine ways to enhance communication, with the aim of offering a constructive approach that may prove beneficial for you.

It is important to express feelings, rather than making accusations. When expressing your feelings, it is helpful to use "I" statements, rather than "You" statements, which can be perceived as accusatory.

As an alternative, you could say something like, "I feel sad because this house holds so many good memories for me," rather than saying, "You don't care about how I feel."

It might be helpful to try to understand the situation from the other person's perspective and ask them to do the same. You might like to tell your partner why you have a special emotional connection to the house and ask for their opinion on the issue.

It may be helpful to choose a quiet moment when you both have time to sit down and discuss the issue, rather than when you are stressed or tired.

It is important to listen carefully to the other person's point of view, even if you disagree. Being heard and understood can often help to relieve tension.

It might be helpful to propose finding a solution together. For example, you could consider whether it is possible to partially retain the memories of the house, or whether there are other ways to commemorate those memories while meeting both parties' needs.

If you feel yourself becoming emotional, it might be helpful to take a moment to calm down and then continue the conversation.

If you find it challenging to resolve communication issues on your own, you might benefit from seeking guidance from a marriage counselor or a psychologist.

It might be helpful to consider writing letters or journal entries as a way of expressing your feelings more clearly and sorting out your emotions.

At times, it might be helpful to give each other some space to calm down and then discuss the issue at hand when you're both feeling more composed.

It may be helpful to acknowledge your partner's feelings and position, and express your appreciation for their willingness to understand and compromise.

Effective communication is based on mutual respect and understanding. Despite differences in thinking, it is often possible for couples to find a compromise that satisfies both parties through patience and hard work.

It would be beneficial to maintain an open mind and be receptive to each other's perspectives throughout this process. I hope you can find a solution that is mutually acceptable. Warm regards,

I hope my answer is helpful. Wishing you all the best, Love, The world and I

I appreciate you sharing your experiences and feelings. Men and women often think and communicate differently, which can lead to challenges in communication and understanding.

The disagreement between you and your husband over the house is a great example of how different we can be when it comes to problems. You see the issue as an emotional one because you have a strong emotional connection with the house, while your husband may be more focused on practical considerations. This is just one example of how men and women think differently when they're facing challenges.

If differences in thinking between men and women make communication tricky, here are a few ideas to try:

1. Understand and accept differences: First, recognize the differences between men and women in terms of thinking and communication styles, and accept these differences. Don't expect your partner to think and express themselves exactly the way you do.

2. Listen and express: When you're communicating, try to stay open and listen. Give your partner enough time to share their views and feelings.

At the same time, you should also be clear about your thoughts and feelings so that the other person knows what you want.

3. Look for common ground. Even though you might have different views, you can still find something you both agree on. Try to see things from your colleague's perspective and find a solution that suits both of you.

4. Compromise and compromise: In communication, you might have to make compromises. This doesn't mean you have to give up your position, but rather find a balance that meets the needs and expectations of both parties.

5. If you're still having trouble communicating, you might want to think about getting some professional help. A counselor can give you a fresh perspective and some practical tips for working through your differences.

In the situation you described, you eventually got your husband to compromise and find a solution that was acceptable to both of you by expressing your dissatisfaction and emotions. This is a good example of how important it is to communicate effectively.

At the end of the day, communication is something you learn and practice forever. When you improve your communication skills and understand each other better, you can handle the differences in how men and women think better and build better, healthier relationships.

Hello, I'm Beric.

It's important to be empathetic and understanding when there are communication barriers caused by differences in how men and women think. We need to recognize that men and women tend to have different inclinations and approaches when thinking about and dealing with problems.

Men are often more inclined to a rational, logical, and problem-solving perspective, while women tend to focus more on emotions, experiences, and relationship maintenance.

It's totally understandable that you feel like you can't be understood by your husband. It's hard to express the deep emotions you have for the house and the memories it holds of your mother in words.

Your husband might not realize this, and his logical thinking makes it tough for him to grasp your emotional feelings.

I think the best thing you can do is try the following strategies:

First, try to express your feelings in a more concrete way. For example, you can describe the meaning of a certain room or object in the house to him, or share some fond memories related to the house.

This will help your husband understand your emotions better.

Try to find a way to understand each other better. You can try to help your husband see things from your perspective and understand your feelings and needs.

At the same time, try to see things from his point of view and find a solution that works for both of you.

It's important to listen to and respect the other person's point of view.

Even if you disagree with someone, it's important to respect their thoughts and feelings. By listening and showing respect, you can build better communication and trust.

4. If you're still having trouble communicating, consider talking to a professional counselor.

They can help you understand each other's thinking styles and needs better and provide effective communication methods and skills.

Finally, everyone is different, and we all have our own way of thinking and emotional needs. When we communicate, it's important to respect each other's differences and listen and express ourselves with understanding and tolerance.

This is the only way we can build better relationships with each other and work together to make things better.

Wishing you the best!

Hello, dear question asker! From your description, I can see your sentimental side. For example, you are nostalgic about your childhood home. You not only want to keep the home, but also maintain it regularly. Even though you don't live there full-time, you still keep the refrigerator stocked with food and someone takes care of it carefully. It's as if the people, events, and objects in the house have never gone away. You try to maintain the atmosphere there as much as possible, as if you want to hold on to the memories of your youthful days as long as possible.

You're probably the only one who can truly appreciate all these little thoughts.

You put your heart and soul into it, and so do I. We've invested a lot of time, energy, and money into this. I can see why your loved one thinks it's time to move on.

As you can see from your analysis, you can also understand your lover's thoughts and you can persuade each other through your own unique way of communicating. You are also aware of the differences in thinking between men and women, which again reflects your rational side.

It's totally normal to feel a little confused about whether using a "child's state" to communicate with your husband might seem a bit childish, and whether there might be a more mature and rational way to make the other person understand you.

It's important to remember that no communication method is perfect. It all depends on your personal characteristics and the other person's. Just because a child's way of communicating might seem ineffective or childish to you, it doesn't mean it's ineffective or childish in general. And a mature way of communicating may not work either. It all depends on what communication methods you are good at and what the other person can accept.

Some couples are totally comfortable with flirting and teasing each other. Others are totally comfortable with one partner being a bit of a spoiled child and the other being the indulgent parent. Some are totally comfortable with either being silent or crying to express themselves, while the other partner is willing to compromise and take the initiative to break the ice. Some are totally comfortable with a rational and critical mode of debate, while others are totally comfortable with the mode of a long-married couple chatting about everything under the sun.

There are so many different ways to communicate! In fact, there are thousands of families with thousands of different ways to communicate. It all depends on which way suits you best. To put it more colloquially, it's a matter of which approach each of you finds appealing.

Communication styles vary according to the situation and mood. Don't worry, there is always a way to communicate, even if it doesn't work the first time.

If you always confront rationally, the other person might think you're unfeeling. If you always act cute, the other person may think you're childish. If you always cry, the other person might think you're difficult and unreasonable. It's important to find a balance!

So, the way you communicate depends on you and the other person. If the other person is feeling frustrated, you can use a calm and understanding tone.

If you really want to reason with her, it might not be the best idea. As I said before, only you can know what it's like to lose your childhood, and only professional counselors like us can truly understand you. From an economic point of view, you might be in the wrong. So, it's okay if you don't feel like you're in the right state of mind to reason with her right now.

I'm so happy to hear you're doing well! I think you're doing a great job communicating with her. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it. It's really good!

Just a heads-up: next time, with a different thing, a different time, a different place, and a different person, you might need a different way of communicating.

It has to do with the differences in how men and women think, and sometimes it has nothing to do with it. It has to do with human nature, and with the fact that people are sometimes complex and changeable, and sometimes simple and straightforward.

All you need to do is switch to a woman to communicate.

Warmest regards!

You want to communicate with your husband on the same wavelength. You are troubled by the lack of communication.

1. My husband's thoughts

"The contract for the house has expired, it needs to be vacated." "It's just a house."

It's not that difficult.

The husband considers how best to proceed, judging right and wrong from an objective perspective and emphasizing facts. His own residence status is irrelevant, as his thinking focuses on the factual level.

2. The wife's feelings

"Emptying the house is the same as losing my connection with my mother." "I have feelings and memories connected with the house. I have lived there since the third grade of elementary school, until just before I graduated from university. I lived there for a total of 13 years."

The wife sees the house as more than just a material thing. It's an emotional level, representing her own growing-up experience and connection with her mother. To her, it's not just a house. It's "the root of life," "the testimony of life," and "the taste of mother."

It is more difficult to feel this from a male perspective.

[Gender differences]

Men and women think differently. If they don't understand each other, they'll have a communication breakdown.

Men value logic and facts. They like to speak directly about conclusions or right and wrong. Women value feelings and relationships. They care about feeling cared for and protected.

[Coping method]

Men must be more patient when listening to women's stories. As long as they are curious, refrain from judging or giving advice, and don't take things too seriously, they will be able to hear what is really being said.

Women must learn to express their emotions, not have their emotions expressed. Tell your husband clearly: "I have lived in this house for 13 years, it has witnessed my growth and represents the bond between me and my mother. I have feelings and memories, and I will not empty this house out."

Men can understand you better when you express your feelings objectively and clearly.

[Self-awareness]

You said, "I feel that I can't communicate with my husband, so I express my dissatisfaction by crying because I feel that he doesn't understand me and I can't say anything. It's a bit like I was also in a 'childish state' at that time."

When you feel dissatisfied, you can't say anything, so you cry. When you don't feel understood, you feel so sad. That sadness wells up inside you, and your emotions fill the whole space, so you can't objectively express your feelings in an "adult manner" with your husband.

Tell me, what evokes this emotional experience in you? Did you experience that feeling of "not being understood" as a child?

What makes you feel strong emotions? When you experience a "childlike state," you can and should observe and understand it.

I am confident that my answer will be enlightening and helpful.

Communication problems caused by differences in men's and women's thinking are not just psychological or emotional. They involve the body, mind, emotions, and cultural background. Each person is a whole, and our thinking, feelings, and expressions are all processes involving the whole body.

So, when we look at ways to deal with communication problems caused by differences in thinking between men and women, we need to think about everything.

Men and women think and express themselves differently because of physical differences. Men tend to think in a more logical, analytical way, while women are more emotional.

This difference is not about being better or worse, but about the natural differences between men and women. If we only look at things from our own perspective, we might not understand the other person.

We need to learn to understand and accept others.

Men and women also have different emotional communication styles. Men tend to be more direct, while women focus on details and emotional communication.

This can cause misunderstandings and conflicts. To avoid this, we need to listen and observe the other person's body language.

This helps us understand them better.

We also need to pay attention to our emotions and physical reactions. When we feel angry, anxious, or frustrated, these emotions can affect our thinking and communication.

To stay calm and communicate well, we need to learn to calm down and relax. We also need to pay attention to our body, as it may be trying to tell us that we need to rest or adjust.

Cultural background also affects communication between men and women. Different cultures have different rules and expectations about men and women's roles and communication styles.

In some cultures, men are expected to be strong, while women are expected to be gentle. This can lead to misunderstandings.

We need to understand and respect each other's cultures and avoid communication barriers caused by cultural differences.

Communication problems caused by differences in thinking between men and women are complex. To overcome this, we need to use a combination of methods and techniques from multiple levels.

We need to listen to others and understand their feelings. We also need to express our own feelings. We need to be open and respectful. We need to avoid prejudice and discrimination.

By working together and communicating, we can bridge the thinking gaps between men and women and have better communication.