Why are you always fixated on your ex-girlfriend, and why does everything seem to involve her?

Hello, question asker!

Based on your description, let me summarize your situation: you have already obtained a marriage license, and you still subconsciously call him your boyfriend. When your boyfriend does something for you, goes somewhere with you, or tells you to do something, you subconsciously think, "Did he treat his ex-girlfriend this way?" This is a great opportunity for you to start fresh with your boyfriend and build a new, exciting relationship!

First of all, you have already obtained a marriage certificate, which is fantastic because your relationship is now protected by marriage law. This is different from other relationships between couples, which is great because it means you have rights.

Your boyfriend, as you call him, has been in many relationships and has chosen to marry you. I believe he has made this decision after careful consideration. You must believe in yourself! You are attractive in your boyfriend's eyes, and he loves you for who you are!

Second, you said that this happens every time you fall in love: you obsess about what they did and where they went with their ex-girlfriends.

The point you are struggling with is actually a sense of comparison. You feel that you are different from them, and you also demand to be different from them. You feel that being treated differently from them can show how special you are, and you think that this is the only way to prove that they love you.

And again, your boyfriend, who has already been certified with you, should be called husband, Mr., or husband, right? He cares about your physical and mental health, which is so important!

He's so excited for you to get back to work! He just wants to make sure you're not bored, that your mind isn't getting idle, and that you're staying connected to society. At the same time, he's thrilled you're considering studying because he knows you'll keep learning and improving. He's especially encouraging you to study to be a kindergarten teacher or a preschool teacher.

It may be that in his perception this job is caring and stress-free, and if you learn the professional knowledge in advance, you can accumulate experience for your future children. Men sometimes think more long-term, which is great because it means they're looking ahead to the future!

You're subconsciously wondering, "Did he do this and that before?" It's a sign that you're eager to learn and grow. You're not yet fully confident in yourself, but you're open to new experiences and ways of seeing things. You're curious about their sincerity and your own attractiveness.

Your boyfriend (husband) has now got a certificate for you! This gives you a legally protected identity, which is proof of his recognition and love for you. Believe in yourself and your husband. You are excellent!

I wish you both the very best and a lifetime of happiness!

Good morning, host!

Upon reading your text, a phrase came to mind: "Can the sun of yesterday dry today's laundry?" What are your thoughts on this?

From your description, it seems that your boyfriend is very considerate, willing to do the laundry and cooking for you, and also encourages you to study. However, it seems that you may associate too much and compare yourself to others too often. Could I ask whether you think there might be anything to gain from such comparisons?

If I might ask, what else are you hoping to gain from this situation?

First, it might be helpful to look outward. Your boyfriend had a girlfriend, and this could be creating an invisible yoke for you, causing you to wonder: Did your boyfriend do all these things for you that he did for his ex-girlfriend?

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether dwelling on past events is truly beneficial. It's understandable to reflect on the past, but it's also important to focus on the present and future.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether your focus on your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend is truly a reflection of your feelings for him, or if it's driven by other factors. Constantly dwelling on this issue might not be the most constructive approach, as it could lead to feelings of self-doubt and mistrust in your relationship.

Could I ask what you are afraid of?

Secondly, it might be helpful to take a moment to reflect on your own thoughts and feelings. You have a certificate, which means it is legal.

You mentioned that you used to have similar concerns about your ex-boyfriend, which suggests that you recognize this as an issue that stems from within. Could you please share what specific things tend to bring up memories from the past?

I wonder if you had similar experiences when you were young. In my experience, finding the root cause is often the solution.

With regard to the choice of major, your boyfriend is simply offering you objective advice. Is that what you desire?

Perhaps the question is whether he should give you advice.

It could be said that every bad marriage is the result of the interaction between oneself and the relationship, while every good marriage is the result of growing together.

Additionally, it's worth noting that male and female thinking patterns differ. Men tend to think in a linear, direct manner, while women often have a more circuitous, multi-faceted approach. This distinction is worth considering when navigating communication and decision-making.

In relationships, it's not uncommon for our complaints about others to reflect our own insecurities. Given that your boyfriend is willing to marry you, it's a positive sign that he values you.

I believe that you should have enough trust in yourself. In my opinion, what you need to do is accept yourself as you are and make yourself better. I think that doubt and curiosity are not good ways to communicate. What you need to do now is just look at today and tomorrow and never look back at yesterday!

Perhaps the most beautiful form of love is a love that is equal in strength, and a friendship that is a match for each other. What else comes to mind?

Hello, I'm Li Yamin, a psychological counselor. Thanks for inviting me to answer. You said you're stuck on your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend and you'll do the same with other boyfriends. You're constantly stuck, and you and he have already gotten married, so all kinds of assumptions about the upcoming marriage and your relationship may make you more suspicious, anxious, and panicked, and lack security right now. I'd like to give you a big hug first.

Since there's not a lot of info here, I'm not sure when you started linking your ex with this guy. Was it at the start of the relationship, before the wedding, or after? If it's a result, it's probably down to some things like marriage fears and worrying about the future. You said it would be the same in other relationships, which makes me think you're not totally confident in the relationship and have more negative expectations. This guy seems really thoughtful and caring, and he's got a mature outlook. If you can get the love of a guy like this and get married, that's not so bad. It means you're not a bad catch yourself.

But why are you still in a relationship that's already over? It's creating an image of an unfamiliar girl between you, which is making you feel like a psychological shadow. I think the reasons can be the following: one possibility is that the boy's behavior triggered your insecurity. Perhaps he wasn't clear about his attitude towards girls, or maybe his meticulous care made you feel dependent and possessive. Another possibility is that you don't feel worthy of love. You doubt others, but you doubt yourself even more.

These are just possibilities, though. They might not be true. If you can, I suggest you do some self-awareness exercises, explore your inner self through psychological methods, understand your past relationship patterns, learn some psychological knowledge, and do it through various forms such as psychological counseling. I look forward to meeting you on the road to self-knowledge.

I hope this helps.

Hello, host!

I'd anxiety/how-to-deal-with-a-female-college-student-who-lacks-paternal-love-and-easily-develops-a-fondness-for-the-opposite-sex-7056.html" target="_blank">love to share my thoughts with you!

One of the most important and exciting characteristics of love is exclusivity. We all want a unique love, and this kind of love is best described as favoritism: "He's cold and indifferent to others, but head over heels in love with me." This special kind of love will give us a great sense of satisfaction and enable us to constantly reaffirm our sense of self-worth.

Unfortunately, reason tells us two unfortunate truths:

1. The great news is that personality is stable!

A person's attitude towards love and the way they get along with their partner are relatively stable as part of their personality traits, especially those that are positive and appreciated and affirmed by the other person.

In the question, you mentioned "cooking for your girlfriend, doing the laundry, taking her out to play, etc.". I think this is just his way of spending time with his girlfriend, and he doesn't treat everyone differently. At the same time, this is also proof that he treats the relationship seriously, with warmth and love.

2. The great news is that what we like may not be a specific person, but a specific type of person!

Everyone in the world is unique and has their own distinctive characteristics, but some traits are similar! When we choose our partner, we may also be attracted to a particular type of temperament.

So, you and your partner's ex-girlfriend may be quite similar! This could be a wonderful thing, as it means you have a lot in common. However, it could also mean that your partner is looking for a replacement.

In fact, they all just belong to the same type that he likes. When you find that he persuades you to take a preschool education course or makes some other suggestions that are similar to what his ex-girlfriend did, it may not be because of the ex-girlfriend, but because he himself may like some of the qualities that girls who majored in preschool education show, such as gentleness, kindness, and love. This is great because it means that he has positive feelings towards women who have studied this subject.

Let's get rid of this anxiety!

1. Always remind yourself, "Forget the evil of the past, and only take the good of the future." A person's past belongs to them and cannot be changed. But here's the good news: you can choose how to respond to it! If we dwell on it too much, not only will we not be able to relieve our anxiety, it will also affect the emotional state of the two of you. So let's choose to focus on the good things in our past and future together!

2. Be more aware of the sweetness and beauty of the relationship. Since you have already decided that you are the right person for each other, then look at the relationship with appreciation and gratitude, and feel the beauty and sweetness of being together. I absolutely believe that will give you a greater sense of security!

3. Do some self-growth to enrich your heart and make yourself more confident! Reading, exercising, cultivating hobbies, etc., are all excellent ways to better see your own value.

I really hope the above is of some help to you!

It can be observed that feelings of jealousy and hatred are often intertwined. When these emotions become enmeshed, they can perpetuate a cycle that traps an individual in a state of dilemma. It is evident that the other person has provided assistance, whether in the form of guidance or in the execution of domestic tasks such as cooking and housework. Such actions are worthy of commendation.

These behaviors may initially appear beneficial, yet they are likely to be met with ambivalence and doubt. This is because they may be perceived as a manifestation of residual jealousy towards one's former romantic partner. Additionally, there may be a sense of unease and embarrassment stemming from the assumption that the former partner may have engaged in similar actions towards the individual in question.

The question thus arises as to why one is perpetually preoccupied with one's former romantic partner. It may be observed that such preoccupations are largely centered around the former partner.

Additionally, one might inquire as to whether the subject in question frequently prepares meals for his former romantic partner.

Additionally, it is perceived that the subject in question frequently performs laundry duties for his former romantic partner.

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️Stuck

☁️☁️☁️☁️Involved

This indicates that the emotion in question is likely to be jealousy. When another individual possesses something, the subject in question will experience jealousy and a desire for that object to be exclusively theirs. The underlying motivation is a need for uniqueness.

It would be beneficial to consider whether you are currently engaged in a cycle of jealousy.

It is worth questioning whether it is truly necessary to experience feelings of jealousy towards individuals from one's past.

It is probable that dwelling on the past will have an impact on the present lives of both parties.

Those who dwell on past events may experience significant repercussions in their present circumstances. They may also perceive a sense of loss, as if something truly occurred to the other person, diminishing their sense of individuality.

In many cases, however, individuals are in fact unique and thus do not need to compare themselves to others. Even if two individuals have previously visited the same restaurant, the restaurant itself, the people who work there, and the environment will all change, as will everything else.

The other individual requested that you register for a professional examination with them. In reality, the other individual is merely offering their opinion. It is still unclear whether or not to pursue this major, and there are still numerous possibilities.

Given that you have already obtained your marriage certificate, it is imperative that you adopt a firm stance and focus on your role as the primary wife. You are the mistress of the house and therefore do not require contact with other individuals of lesser importance. The past is firmly established in historical records.

It is not possible to alter the course of history. It is possible that your ongoing preoccupation may be rooted in feelings of jealousy and anxiety. We advise you to take the Love and Life Psychological Test, which can be found in the Psychological Test section on the homepage. You can then receive a one-on-one interpretation of the results. We wish you the best of luck!

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