Why is it that the more you have, the less happy you are?

Good day, question asker.

It is curious to note that the more one has, the less one may feel happy. Before considering this question further, it would be beneficial to first ascertain what one truly desires.

From your description, it seems that you are actually doing quite well in terms of material life. However, as you gain more social experience and grow older, it seems that you are constantly adjusting your standards of happiness.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs identifies five levels of human needs: 1. physiological needs, 2. safety needs, 3. needs for belonging and love, 4. needs for respect, and 5. needs for self-fulfillment.

It seems that the questioner is no longer focused on the basic fulfillment of material needs. It appears that they have already reached a level where they are pursuing spiritual needs.

From your description, it is evident that you have a certain material foundation and a supportive family. Compared to many individuals, you are undoubtedly in a favorable position.

However, I sense a persistent sense of unease in your demeanor. Could it be a lack of confidence? Or perhaps it's a concern about the unpredictability of the future? Or is it a desire for deeper insight?

I have experienced this feeling that cannot be described in precise words. Please find below a list of my feelings that I would like to share with you:

1. Focus on the present and maximize the value of each day.

It is important to recognize that despite our concerns and apprehensions, certain events will inevitably occur. However, if we allow ourselves to become overly preoccupied with worry, we may inadvertently overlook the beauty of our surroundings and fail to recognize the small but meaningful blessings in our lives.

Furthermore, it will result in increased internal conflict.

It is important to be aware of potential risks, but it is also beneficial to embrace the opportunities that arise in life. By fully engaging with each day, one can gain valuable insights and unexpected insights.

2. Engage in an activity that brings you enjoyment.

The longest and most beneficial relationship a person can have is with themselves. Engaging in activities that you truly enjoy will generate positive energy and nourish your inner self.

When you immerse yourself in your own little world, you will feel a sense of joy and fulfillment. I believe that recharging yourself in this way is beneficial.

3. It is up to each individual to determine their own definition of happiness and contentment.

You are the primary authority on your own performance. External standards are secondary and for reference only.

It is essential to prioritize your own feelings and recognize that external standards may not align with your personal needs.

Finally, I would like to remind you to set aside time each day to be alone. I also encourage you to keep a journal of the small blessings in your life.

I hope these suggestions are helpful to you.

I hope this information proves useful to you.

Hello. I can see that you're confused and disoriented, and I'm here to help.

I was thinking about a similar question the other day. I always want to get everything, but I can never feel satisfied.

I am going back to school to get good grades. I am spending as much time as I can with my friends and making time to improve my skills. I am learning to appreciate what I already have and the growth I have gained along the way. I am noticing that my mind has grown by leaps and bounds. I am focusing on my own progress and not comparing myself to others. I am recognizing that I have skills that I can be proud of. I am not letting envy get in the way of my happiness.

I'm ashamed to admit that I've missed countless opportunities to be proud of myself and feel happy. Have you also reflected on the moments of pride and happiness you've overlooked?

You already know the answer to this question. How we perceive the amount of things we have has a greater impact on our happiness than the things themselves.

People who value material things are less satisfied with what they have and are more likely to complain about life. A large-scale international survey definitively shows that people in wealthy countries are not necessarily happier than those in poorer countries.

Let's be clear: the rich people who are among the top 100 on the Forbes rich list are only a little happier than ordinary people.

It's normal to feel that these are only temporary pleasures and that lasting happiness is out of reach. In the book There's a Method to Happiness, a psychology professor at the University of California writes, "50% of our happiness is innate and determined by our genes; 10% of our happiness is determined by our living environment; the remaining 40% of our happiness is determined by our actions and thinking."

"I'm going to tell you how to make yourself happy.

1. Cultivate a grateful heart and be thankful for what you already have. Don't envy what others have; recognize that what you have may be something others can only wish for.

Second, accept the imperfect self. Spend time getting to know your shortcomings. Don't compare yourself to others. Focus on improving and paying attention to your progress.

Treat yourself like a friend. Give yourself tolerance and understanding.

3. Give yourself more credit. When you were studying, you knew you'd be able to buy the things you wanted once you got a job. And you did!

You have a house and a car at home, and you also have a warm family. You should be proud of that!

I am Qingtai, and I am confident that my answer will help you. Have a happy day!

Hello, why is it that the more you have, the harder it is to be happy? I've been thinking about this too.

I hope my experience can help you.

At the Spring Festival dinner, friends said I have a happy family and am a winner.

When I get home, I'm still puzzled. I'd rate my happiness less than 6.

Am I happy? I found the answer after meditating on self-acceptance.

During my seventh meditation on self-acceptance, I realized I was full of self-criticism and self-doubt.

I find flaws in myself and feel disgust.

I've always been too eager to become a better version of myself.

When I can't meet my own standards, I feel disappointed, inferior, and anxious.

I've been too hard on myself.

Can you accept yourself?

Accepting our flaws, but still trying to be better.

Then we can find happiness.

We can be happy even if we're different.

02, Internalizing and consuming oneself is an evolutionary trait.

In life, it's easy to see the differences between ourselves and others. This leads to comparisons, which cause self-doubt and self-defeating behavior.

Comparisons can make us reject and ignore parts of ourselves.

If you don't accept yourself, you won't be happy.

03, we can accept ourselves and be happy.

First, we learn to accept ourselves.

I didn't really accept myself. So I began a new journey of learning and growth.

Self-acceptance doesn't mean liking yourself. It means letting go.

I now allow and "let go."

Allow yourself to see your flaws and accept them. Then, try something new.

"Letting go" means letting go and letting be. I will try to let go of some of my thoughts and obsessions.

When you let go of your obsessions, you will feel at ease.

I saw myself through self-acceptance meditation, so I've kept meditating.

Take some time to relax, slow down your breathing, pat yourself, hum a low tune, or practice mindfulness and meditation.

Then, you will feel peace and love, and happiness.

I love you, world! I hope this helps.

Dear Questioner, Thank you for your message. I can appreciate the confusion and unease you have expressed.

In today's fast-paced social environment, it is easy to become caught up in a cycle of comparison and dissatisfaction. Even when individuals have achieved a certain level of material comfort and social status, they may still face challenges in achieving lasting happiness and inner peace.

This phenomenon can be interpreted from a number of different perspectives.

There is a psychological concept called "relative deprivation," also known as "adaptation level theory." This theory posits that individuals' perceptions of their own well-being are often influenced by comparisons with their surroundings and social groups.

When you observe your colleagues enjoying a different lifestyle or owning newer and better material things, you may still experience a sense of relative deprivation despite already having what you need, which can diminish the satisfaction you should otherwise feel.

2. The Diderot effect, also known as the "complementary effect," refers to the phenomenon whereby individuals who have acquired a new object find that their existing possessions no longer meet their psychological expectations. This leads to a desire to consume more and a constant pursuit of a higher quality of life. This never-ending pursuit is often accompanied by stress and dissatisfaction.

3. The relationship between goal setting and happiness is that in the pursuit of goals, there is a tendency to overlook achievements already made and to focus unduly on unachieved goals.

Stable work and a harmonious family are elements of life that many people strive for. However, once these are achieved, new expectations arise, such as more free time and a higher quality of life. This can result in the neglect of existing sources of happiness.

4. I once met a highly successful businessperson who had accumulated considerable wealth and status. However, during our conversation, he candidly revealed that the moments that brought him the greatest joy were not those when he had the most, but rather the days spent striving for his dreams and sharing ordinary moments with his family. He came to understand that true happiness does not lie in the accumulation of material things, but in inner peace and gratitude.

5. Over time, satisfaction and happiness in life are not solely dependent on material factors. They are also contingent on spiritual fulfillment and satisfaction.

It may be beneficial to re-examine your values, learn to appreciate what you already have, and shift your focus to the non-material realm, such as personal growth, relationships, physical and mental health, and meaningful work.

Cultivating an attitude of gratitude, regularly reflecting on and adjusting one's priorities in life, can help reduce unnecessary anxiety and stress.

In conclusion, the quantity of possessions does not directly correlate with an individual's level of happiness. The determining factor is the perception and utilization of these possessions, the ability to maintain contentment and happiness, and the ability to achieve a balance between pursuing material things and enhancing one's inner spiritual world, in order to achieve true happiness and peace.

Hello! I can see you're feeling a bit confused about why it can be so hard to feel happy when you have so much. It's because we often see the good things about other people, but we often forget that we are also very good!

Comparison is a real bummer, isn't it? We're all different, and what makes us happy is different, too. But desire is a big factor in happiness.

Contentment is happiness, my friend. And you can also be happy by eating delicious food and wearing beautiful clothes.

It seems like you have a lot, but you're still feeling anxious, stressed, and afraid of losing it. I'm wondering if it's because you feel insecure and confused inside?

I also went through a rough patch where I felt really unhappy, even though I was doing well at school and had found a decent job after graduation. I felt like life was meaningless. But you know what? We can try to look at the ordinary things in life with a positive attitude and find happiness in the little things.

Your attitude is a really important factor in how happy you are. A positive attitude is completely different from a negative one. A positive attitude can learn from setbacks and grow.

It's so important to learn to be grateful! Write in a notebook about all the things you have that make you happy. Don't think about the things you don't have. The more you think about it, the less you'll get, and you'll lose your happiness.

If you really want it, you can set a plan and goal, work hard to achieve it, and reap the happiness! I really hope the original poster can be happy every day!

Hello.

You say you have a lot, but you don't feel happy compared to others.

You work as hard as others, but don't get the same rewards.

You'll believe you're unwilling and unfair.

I don't know if the OP agrees or resists when I'm so blunt.

I used to be like the original poster. I saw that other people had a lot without working hard for it, while I still couldn't have a lot of things.

This makes you anxiety/a-teenager-student-why-is-he-or-she-feeling-inexplicably-unhappy-recently-and-unable-to-cheer-up-12247.html" target="_blank">unhappy.

We compare ourselves to others and want to be the best.

We can't accept our lives, our imperfections, or that we're inferior to others. This is a common state of mind.

Buddhism teaches that the more we want to possess and the more restless we feel, the more anxious and stressed we become.

People are obsessed with getting more. They also fear losing.

A few years ago, I was afraid my husband would leave me. I tried to control him, which made things worse.

A counselor helped me sort out my thoughts and focus on myself. I stopped worrying about others and started feeling happy and confident.

If you can't find a way to improve your mood, you can look for a counselor on the platform.

When we want to let go, we need someone to catch us.

I love you, world! ?

Greetings,

From your writing, it is evident that you are an individual who has attained a relatively comfortable material standard of living and continues to prioritize the pursuit of a spiritual life.

There is an inflection point between happiness and the accumulation of wealth. Prior to this inflection point, it is true that an individual's happiness will increase in direct proportion to their wealth. However, after this inflection point, even if income continues to grow, the increase in happiness is unlikely to be significant.

The relationship between money and happiness is contingent upon how one spends and utilizes it. Many individuals fail to achieve happiness because they spend money in a mindless manner, adhering to the tenets of consumerism.

Such individuals fail to consider their ranking of values and their genuine needs.

The following section presents a series of recommendations for the prudent expenditure of financial resources, with the objective of enhancing one's psychological well-being and sense of purpose, even within the constraints of a limited budget.

The primary guideline is to refrain from conspicuous consumption.

The greater the proportion of showing off and comparing, the greater the negative impact on happiness. This phenomenon can be succinctly captured by the proverb, "You win face, but lose essence."

Individuals typically purchase items with the intention of experiencing positive emotions. However, it is also possible to invest in time to alleviate negative experiences.

Psychologists posit that this phenomenon is primarily attributable to the adaptability of the human mind. Individuals tend to underestimate their capacity to adapt to negative experiences and overestimate the degree of happiness derived from positive ones.

The purchase of a new residence, the attainment of a promotion, and the receipt of a salary increase are all events that may be expected to engender feelings of happiness. However, it is likely that these feelings will subside after a period of time. As time progresses, our capacity to experience the same level of happiness diminishes.

This is a social phenomenon, and more and more people are finding it difficult to feel happy. But there is hope!

What could be more joyful than something easily obtained?

Which is happier: someone who has obtained something unique or rare that only a few people possess, or someone who has obtained something that everyone around them has? I'm going for the former! Even if the quality of what I have isn't as high as what other people have, I'm still happy because I'm one of the few who has it.

We are living in an incredible time of information explosion! Knowledge that was once difficult to obtain can now be easily accessed online.

In the era before the internet, our exposure to people was very limited, and we still had some advantages over the people around us. Now that the internet is so well developed, we just need to go online and see: the average monthly income in a certain region is tens of thousands of yuan, the annual salary is hundreds of thousands of yuan, and luxury homes and cars are everywhere. It's a whole new world out there!

I can't help but doubt myself: Am I the one holding everyone back? Am I a total failure?

Is this not hard enough? With these kinds of thoughts, where is the ability to feel happy about what you have? But we can change this!

Let's explore how we can improve our ability to feel happy!

Know yourself. Break away from external evaluation systems and turn on internal evaluation systems!

We all love to hear what others think of us, don't we? It's human nature to want to be approved of and appreciated. But external evaluations can be so unstable. They can be positive or negative, and when the negative comments outweigh the positive ones, it's hard to be happy.

When you turn your evaluation system inwards, you'll find that the voices of others become less important. You'll start listening to your inner feelings and enjoying the simple joy of doing things. And the best part is that this joy is always there, waiting for you!

Listen to the voice of the body!

Our thinking is influenced by the external environment, which presents us with a wealth of voices, from certain authorities to family attitudes and the mainstream voice of society. Sometimes the mind can be misleading, but the body never is! The body is a mirror of the mind, and it will prompt the correct voice.

The mind will tell you to do this and that, and it will judge you for doing this and not doing that. But guess what? The body will send signals, perhaps a tightening of the muscles, clenched teeth, furrowed brows, or a headache.

It's time to let go of all that judgment in your mind! Trust your body, and feel the position of your body as it changes. Empty your mind, stop directing your body, and feel the natural state of your body!

There are so many amazing mindfulness exercises related to listening to the body!

Let those painful emotions flow!

You may be wondering, since we are discussing the ability to be happy, why should we let painful emotions flow? Well, because we can!

Because we don't only have one kind of happiness, there will inevitably be some pain and other emotions. And that's okay! It's all part of the journey to happiness.

And the great news is that our minds can expand to accommodate more than just pain. By letting go of painful emotions, we make room for happy ones to flow in!

Let it all out! Express your pain on an emotional level in words and pour out your emotions. If there is a suitable person, someone who can listen, talk to them.

If there is no one to talk to, you can always find a safe material object to turn to, such as a tree, a flower pot, or a toy!

Another great way to let go of negative emotions is to write them out! It's a fantastic way to express those crazy, chaotic, negative emotions in written form on paper. It's always better to let it stay on paper than in your heart.

Good day, questioner!

I am fortunate to have a house and a car, and I am grateful for my family. However, despite these blessings, I find myself wondering why I am not happier inside.

The above paragraph is an exact reflection of your question. You are now reading it carefully again. You used the words "just" and "only" to indicate that you may not fully accept and appreciate having these things. It's possible that your heart is not truly content.

Perhaps it would be helpful to really see and feel the happiness and sense of security that what you have brings you. It's possible that the mind is mistaken in thinking that you have a lot.

You might find it helpful to read the book The Magic, which I think could help you to feel more satisfied and happy.

You might find it helpful to write in a gratitude journal and really feel that you already have a lot.

For instance, I am grateful for my good health.

I am grateful that my family has a house to protect us from the wind and rain.

I am fortunate to be able to live comfortably.

I am grateful to have a car that can take me further.

I would be grateful if you could make my travel more convenient and free.

You may notice a difference in the way these words sound when read aloud, compared to the original version.

It might be helpful to consider whether constant anxiety and stress, and the fear of losing what you have, are having a negative impact on your life.

Anxiety, stress, and fear can unfortunately have the effect of reducing our natural ability to feel happy.

Perhaps what we could benefit from is learning to relax and enjoy the present. It might be helpful to focus on being happy and joyful about the things we can do in the present.

It can be challenging to feel happy when living with anxiety, stress, and the fear of losing. I would gently suggest reading the book The Power of Now as a way to help navigate these feelings.

If I might summarize,

1. If I might suggest, it would be beneficial to take the time to appreciate the things you have and the happiness they bring you.

2. Consider letting go of your worries, fears, and anxieties. This could allow room for happiness.

3. It might be helpful to try to live in the present and feel the happiness of the moment.

Hello, dear questioner!

I'm thrilled to dive into this topic with you! From your description, it's clear the questioner has touched on a major topic that's on everyone's minds these days: why are we less happy when we have more?

I'm so excited to share some of my thoughts with the questioner! I really hope they'll find them helpful.

1. Be content and grateful!

It's no secret that humans have an insatiable desire to always want more. We often tell our brains, and even have an urge, that the more we possess, the better. And why not? The more we have, the better and happier we will feel!

On the contrary, it's the lack of material possessions that makes those who have nothing happy! Think about it. If you find a dollar on the street, you'll be overjoyed, thinking good luck has come your way.

Being satisfied with 1 yuan fills him with hope and a sense of divine blessing. Of course, some people are thrilled to find money, but most people are not satisfied with just finding 1 yuan.

For example, when we only have half a glass of water, some people see only half a glass of water, while others are grateful that there is still half a glass of water. Being grateful makes us richer inside!

This brings to mind the "minimalist" lifestyle that's all the rage these days. There's a minimalist brand called Muji that I'm sure the questioner has heard of!

Their designer, Kenya Hara, has long been a champion of the concept of "the use of uselessness." It's amazing what an empty room can do for our comfort levels!

Sometimes, less is more, and slow is fast!

2. Greedy dopamine

Once we have a house, we want a bigger one! Once we have a car for daily use, we want a cooler, newer one! We are always unconsciously trying to have more and more, constantly feeding our inner desires!

Why is this so?

The author of the book "Greedy Dopamine" has an intriguing suggestion: the word "satisfaction" is not in the dictionary of dopamine. This means that no matter how good things are now, dopamine will make us want more! It turns out that dopamine is not a "happy molecule" at all, but a "desire molecule."

It doesn't make us happy, but it has a much greater impact than just being "happy." And that's a good thing!

3. Make the most of your health!

As the original poster mentioned, we have so much, and yet our hearts are not happier. We are always anxious and stressed, and we are afraid of losing what we have. The more we have, the less we are satisfied, and the more we feel like there is always something missing. So we keep sending signals to our brains: we want this, we want that, we want everything. The more we want, the more anxious we become, and the more we are afraid of losing. It seems that we have entered a kind of cycle, like a long-distance run with no end in sight. But we can break free from it!

The finish line is no longer in the distance—it's right beside you! Take a good look around you. Stop chasing endlessly, and you'll feel much more relaxed!

As the saying goes, a person's wealth lies in having a healthy heart!

That's all I have to share for now, but stay tuned because there's more to come! Best wishes!

Hello, my name is Beric, and I'm happy to be here with you today!

It's really interesting to think about why it is that the more you have, the less happy you feel. There are lots of different ways to explore this, from a psychological and sociological perspective.

Our psychological needs are like a pyramid, with the most basic physiological needs at the bottom and higher-level needs like safety, social connection, respect, and self-fulfillment at the top. Once our basic needs are met, we naturally start to pursue these higher-level needs.

However, as material wealth increases, people may find that it does not directly satisfy higher-level psychological needs, such as emotional connection and self-identity. In addition, the "principle of adaptation" in psychology also states that people's responses to external stimuli will gradually weaken, including their sense of satisfaction with material wealth.

So, even if people have more, they might lose that excitement and satisfaction over time as they get used to it.

Another way to look at this is through social comparison theory. We all tend to compare our situation with others, and this comparison process often leads to a sense of dissatisfaction.

It's only natural that when we see others have more, we might feel a bit deprived, even if we already have a lot. And it's true that our society often defines success and happiness in terms of material possessions. This can make us feel like we need to keep chasing more to meet social expectations, while sometimes we might forget about our true inner needs.

On top of that, the fast pace and high pressure of modern society can make it tough for folks to feel happy. In the pursuit of material wealth, people may sometimes neglect emotional communication with others, self-growth, and inner peace, which are all important elements of happiness.

In a nutshell, the more you have, the less happy you feel. It's because people's psychological needs are complex and multi-leveled, and material wealth can't always meet all of them. Plus, social comparisons, social expectations, and the pressures of modern society can also make it tough for folks to feel truly happy. So, it's important to pay attention to our inner needs and pursue a balanced lifestyle to truly feel happy.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello! I understand.

Everyone wants to be happy. It's part of how we're wired. In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to compare and compete. We're also influenced by what others say and do, as well as by our own doubts. All of this affects how happy we are.

It's hard to be happy when you compare yourself to an ideal you can't reach. Self-empowerment doesn't always help. Your feelings are normal. They reflect your expectations, awareness, and concerns.

A correct way of looking at happiness is also relative and a rational tool. Only by looking at it in a positive way can lasting happiness be achieved.

First, analyze the reasons for unhappiness.

1) A weak sense of self-identity.

The mind is full of pain and fear, which makes it hard to feel happy.

3) Values are confused, so happiness is hard to find.

4) Happiness is short-lived.

Some people are unhappy even though they have a lot. This is because people have different needs at different stages of life. They often neglect to satisfy their own needs.

How can we be happy?

(1) Know yourself and become your best self.

Happiness comes from focusing on yourself, sharing your happiness with others, and setting goals.

2) Be grateful and appreciate your good fortune.

Be grateful for the people you meet and enjoy the moments you share with them. You can also enjoy your interests and hobbies.

For example, writing, yoga, and sports help you find a balance between what you like and what others like.

3) Improve how you see things and develop your spirituality.

Know yourself, explore yourself, and awaken your inner power. Stay aware of your body and mind, practice mindfulness, and allow happiness to flow.

4) Think rationally.

Think rationally, find your own motivation, and let emotions pass. When emotions are balanced, you will feel happy or less pained.

Happiness doesn't come from having a lot or from getting what you want. It comes from understanding yourself and accepting what you can accept. Just as grass is happy when it's nourished and appreciated, we can be happy too. It's not about getting more, but about letting go of what's holding us back.

Maybe it depends on what you want. You can find happiness by trying, enjoying the moment, or getting things done.

Recommended books: "Resilience" and "The Power of the Present Moment." Read them for inspiration!

I'm Peiwen. I love the world.

Hello, questioner! I can sense your confusion and exhaustion from the text. This is a complex issue involving multiple factors. I will provide some explanations that I believe will be helpful for us to discuss.

—Adaptation and habituation: We adapt quickly to new things or environments, including increases in material wealth. Once we have adapted to a higher standard of living, the sense of happiness brought about by new material wealth diminishes.

This adaptation phenomenon is called hedonic adaptation.

—Comparison mentality: We often compare our lives with others. When we have more things, we may find that the people around us have even more, which is a clear sign that we are lacking. This can trigger dissatisfaction and anxiety and reduce the sense of happiness.

—Pressure and responsibility: Having more often means taking on more responsibility and pressure. Having more possessions requires more time and energy to maintain and manage, which leads to feelings of fatigue and anxiety and affects the sense of happiness.

—Changing values: As material wealth increases, people's values inevitably change. Some people foolishly regard having more material wealth as a sign of success, neglecting other important aspects of life such as relationships, health, and spirituality.

This shift in values makes it difficult for people to feel true happiness.

—Endless pursuit: Human desires are endless. Once a desire is satisfied, a new one arises.

Therefore, even if one has a lot, one will still feel dissatisfied and thus find it difficult to feel happy.

To feel more joy in life, pay attention to your inner needs, cultivate a positive attitude, establish good interpersonal relationships, maintain a healthy lifestyle, and find things that truly make you feel content and happy. At the same time, learn to cherish and be grateful for what you already have and avoid being caught up in endless desires.

It is a common misconception that having more material wealth or experiences will automatically bring greater happiness. In fact, your state of mind and lifestyle play a much more significant role in determining your happiness levels. If you want to avoid the situation of "the more you have, the less happiness you feel," then you need to take control of your mindset and lifestyle.

—Set reasonable expectations. High expectations often lead to disappointment. Understand your own needs and abilities, and set realistic goals. This will help you maintain a positive mindset and a sense of satisfaction.

—Pay attention to your inner needs. True happiness often comes from inner satisfaction. Understand your own values, interests, and passions, and pursue what is meaningful to you. Don't pursue material wealth blindly.

—Cultivate a grateful heart. Learn to cherish what you have and be grateful for the little beauties in life. A grateful heart helps you cherish what you have now even more, and thus feel more happiness.

—Build good relationships: Maintain good relationships with family, friends, and the community. Share your lives and experiences with each other. Do this, and you will be happy. —Caring for others and accepting the love of others will make you feel warm and happy.

— Maintain physical and mental health. Exercise, a healthy diet, and adequate rest and sleep are essential for maintaining a good physical and mental state, which increases happiness.

Pursue personal growth. Learn continuously, improve your abilities and skills, and achieve personal growth and progress. This will bring inner satisfaction and happiness. Challenge yourself and break through your limits to discover more potential and value.

—Learn to let go and accept: It's time to accept that the more you have, the more you'll have to learn to let go. Learn to accept the imperfections and changes in life, and face challenges and difficulties with an open mind. This is how you'll face life more calmly and feel more joy.

Pay attention to your inner needs, cherish what you have, establish good relationships with others, pursue personal growth and progress, and learn to let go and accept.

I'm Deng Hong, a listening coach. I can help you. Every voice in your heart is worth listening to. Talk to me.

My dear friend, I empathize with your feelings. In this fast-paced society, we are often influenced by various external voices, which may sometimes make us question our lives and even cause us to forget what we truly value.

It's not uncommon to feel anxious and stressed, and to fear the loss of everything you have. Your feelings are understandable and valid, reflecting your concern for your life and your worries about the future.

The emotion you mentioned is called "comparative anxiety" in psychology, and it is a common psychological phenomenon. Many people experience a sense of emptiness and unease inside while pursuing material things and success.

It is often the case that we forget that inner satisfaction and happiness do not come from external achievements alone. Rather, they come from a love of life, care for family, value for friends, and acceptance of oneself.

Everyone's life path is different. It's possible that your classmates may have things you envy, but it's important to remember that they may also have their own worries and challenges.

Similarly, you also have your own unique characteristics and areas of pride. You are fortunate to have a loving family, a stable home, and a reliable means of transportation, which many people only dream of.

These seemingly ordinary things are the cornerstone of your happy life. However, we often tend to overlook what we have and focus on what we don't have.

It could be said that true happiness does not come from material possessions alone, but also from an attitude towards life and inner contentment. Psychologist Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory suggests that human needs can be divided from low to high into physiological needs, safety needs, social needs, esteem needs and self-fulfillment needs.

Once our fundamental requirements are met, it becomes increasingly important to pursue higher levels of self-realization and inner satisfaction.

In order to find inner peace and happiness, it can be helpful to engage in self-reflection. In our busy lives, it can be challenging to maintain a sense of inner calm amidst the hustle and bustle of the outside world.

Through self-reflection, we can gain a deeper understanding of our emotions and needs, and recognize that our value extends beyond material possessions. This enhanced self-awareness can assist us in maintaining a peaceful state of mind when facing the challenges of life.

Practicing gratitude can help us to appreciate the beauty in life. You might like to try setting aside a few minutes every day to write down what you are grateful for. This could be the support of your family, the company of friends, or even a delicious meal.

This practice allows us to appreciate everything in front of us, which in turn helps us to cultivate a positive force in the depths of our hearts. Setting short-term and long-term goals provides direction in our lives and also helps to stimulate our potential and motivation.

It may also be helpful to consider that positive social interactions can play a role in relieving stress and enhancing happiness. Deep communication with family and friends, sharing feelings and experiences, can potentially contribute to enhancing relationships and providing support and encouragement when difficulties arise.

If anxiety and stress persist, it may be helpful to consider seeking professional psychological counseling. Professional counselors can provide guidance in understanding our emotions and may offer strategies for coping with psychological difficulties, with the aim of promoting inner peace and happiness.

Everyone's journey through life is unique. It's important to recognize that we all have different paces and preferences. Rather than comparing ourselves to others, it's valuable to appreciate our own pace and enjoy the scenery along the way.

You have already accumulated a great deal, and these are all valuable assets on your journey through life. It would be beneficial for you to believe in yourself, cherish the present, and embrace the future.

Happiness is a feeling in the heart that does not depend on external wealth, but rather comes from a love of life and an awareness of oneself. It is important to remember that happiness is not something that can be compared, but rather something that is felt.

May you greet every morning and sunset with a more peaceful mind in the days to come, and experience every moment of life. May your inner world be a source of strength and comfort.

Dear friend,

It seems like your unhappiness might be tied to a specific way of thinking: I have to be better off than others to be happy.

It's so easy to think that happiness has to be based on something external. But it doesn't have to be like that! Having a house, a car and a warm family is a great start.

It can be so hard to keep up with all the changes and expectations that come our way. We're always being told we have to be the best in a certain category.

I think the bar for happiness is set pretty high, don't you? The world around us is always changing, and if we decide that we can only be happy if we're better than everyone else, it can cause a lot of stress and anxiety.

Our minds can play tricks on us, can't they? They'll constantly look at other people's achievements and keep telling us that we're not as good as others, that we must work harder and not relax and enjoy ourselves. Of course, this kind of thinking will create all kinds of internal unrest, anxiety, and stress.

They just can't seem to feel and enjoy the happiness they already have.

There's a psychological term called "learned helplessness" that describes how if a child is frequently dealt a blow during their development, they're likely to develop learned helplessness. When they grow up and encounter problems, they'll habitually feel that they cannot solve them and that they are helpless. I think the education we receive about happiness from an early age can also cause us to become unhappily learned.

If parents in the family rarely have time to be happy, are often in a state of anxiety and stress trying to get ahead, and often show envy of others, children will naturally learn that their family is inadequate and that other people's families are happy.

If parents are anxious, constantly criticize their children for not being good enough, compare their children with others, fail to recognize their children's individual characteristics, and rarely show their children appreciation and contentment, it can really take a toll on their children. They might start to believe that they can only be happy if they can surpass others and have more than others in order to gain recognition.

This kind of thinking will only get stronger when you start school and get a job.

As adults, we tend to get used to feeling unhappy. Even if we have a lot, there are always people with more. It can be hard to see what you have, which makes it tough to feel happy. But it's also easy to feel unhappy.

You've taken a good look at your own thinking habits, and you've probably noticed that you agree with this way of thinking. That's why you feel more anxious and stressed. But there's a part of you that's at peace while you're feeling anxious and stressed. That's because this way of thinking gives you a certain sense of rightness.

On the other hand, letting go of this way of thinking might feel like a big challenge at first. It can mean taking a few risks, as if you're challenging and betraying your parents' education, challenging the mainstream values of society, and entering an experience that's completely new and different, with a lot of uncertainty and fear.

You have the choice to either keep on struggling with anxiety and stress, try to succeed, or reflect on your own thoughts. You can slowly let go of the beliefs that make you feel stressed and learn to experience real happiness in life.

I really hope this helps. I'm listening, therapist Xu Yanlian, so please feel free to come and chat.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello, I'm Zeyu.

"Why is it that the more you have, the harder it is to feel happy?" The answer is simple: human desires are endless. The more you have, the more you want to have. What you can get and want to get will make us more aware of what we don't have and ignore the part we already have. In this state, it's impossible to be happy.

The situation described by the questioner in his description is a reflection of our daily lives. We long to have, but once we really have it, we want more. When we were young, we longed to grow up, and when we grew up, we hoped to go back to the past. When we were in school, we wanted to go to work, and after we started working, we thought to ourselves, "If I had another chance, I would study hard."

We know these thoughts are impossible and will never come true. However, the thoughts themselves can give us a chance to escape the burdens and responsibilities given to us by real life. People are often contradictory.

Our envy stems from our definition of happiness itself. If we believe that we can only be happy if we have it and unhappy if we don't, then we are deluded. What we already have cannot make us feel satisfied, while what we don't have will make us feel envious and want to have it. This is a competitive happiness, and the only way to feel happy is to surpass your opponent. This kind of happiness is based on acquisition, but the reality is that the more we have, the more we desire. Human desires are endless.

"But why is it that even though I already have a lot, I don't feel happier inside, and I'm always anxious and stressed, afraid of losing everything I have?" This is because we worry internally that we will lose everything we have, and that only when we have it will we be happy.

If you want to change this way of life, start by recognizing the positive aspects of what you already have. For those who long to have it, imagine yourself with it. This can relieve the pressure in our hearts. For the anxious part, calm your heart through mindfulness or accept and calm your emotions through rational thinking.

Hello, my name is Yang Yiqing, and I'm a listening coach!

It's so important to understand how you feel, especially in today's society, which is full of comparisons and competition. The great news is that your feelings are not isolated; many people experience similar emotions, so you're not alone!

We can absolutely explore your emotions step by step to find inner peace and contentment!

First of all, what you are experiencing is a sense of relative deprivation. When you see that other people have things that you don't have, it's an opportunity for you to recognize what you already have and be grateful for it!

It's only natural to compare ourselves to others. Social media and online culture just make it easier to do so! After all, people tend to only show the best parts of their lives, which can make you feel like your life is not as good as others.

However, it is important to remember that everyone's life trajectory is unique, and we each have our own pace and timing, which is great because it means we can all find our own path to success!

Next, let's talk about the incredible power of gratitude! When you focus on all the good things in your life, it can transform your sense of well-being.

For example, you mentioned that you have a warm and loving family, which is something many people dream of. That is something to be grateful for! Try to spend a little time every day thinking about the things you are grateful for.

This is a great way to reduce the tendency to compare yourself with others and help you refocus on the positive aspects of your life!

Then there's "inner unrest and fear." Your anxiety and fear may come from worrying about losing what you have, but you can conquer that!

This fear is totally normal, but excessive worry can affect your mental health. The great news is that you can take control of it! Try practicing mindfulness meditation, which can help you live in the present and reduce unnecessary worries about the future.

Embrace the uncertainty in life and watch your fear disappear!

It is also a great idea to seek external support! Talking to friends, family, or a counselor about how you feel can be very helpful.

Sometimes, simply sharing your feelings with others can make you feel better. And if you need a little extra help, there are plenty of great professional psychological counselors out there who can help you!

And finally, remember that happiness is an internal process! External things, such as material wealth or the way other people live their lives, can only provide temporary satisfaction.

True happiness is yours for the taking! It comes from understanding and accepting yourself, and cherishing what you already have in life. Learn to find happiness from within, and you'll be on the fast track to long-term happiness!

And finally, remember that your life is your own special journey. Don't compare it to anyone else's. Focus on your own growth and happiness, and enjoy every moment of it! You'll feel more fulfilled and satisfied for it.

I'm excited to recommend these books!

1. The incredible "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle!

In this book, Eckhart Tolle really emphasizes the importance of living in the present. He teaches people how to transcend self-consciousness and reduce excessive focus on the past and future, and it's truly amazing how much of a difference this can make to your quality of life and inner peace!

2. "The Art of Simplicity" by Dominique Loreau

This incredible book introduces a revolutionary philosophy of simplifying life that will change your life forever! It advocates improving the quality of your life by reducing material possessions. It emphasizes increasing inner clarity and peace by simplifying your environment and habits.

3. Braving the Wilderness by Brené Brown

Brené Brown is on a mission to spread the word about the importance of courage, vulnerability, belonging, and the significance of bravery. She offers insight and practical strategies to help people stay true and brave in the face of loneliness, criticism, and uncertainty.

I am Yang Yiqing, and I love to listen! Life is an amazing journey, and every step is worth celebrating. Let's move forward together with joy and excitement!

Hello. I can see you're anxious, so let me give you a hug!

We have more than before, but we are less happy. Many people feel this way. Stress and anxiety make it hard to be happy. They also make it hard to stay happy. I don't have a simple answer, but I can share a thought. I hope it helps.

People are less happy, stressed, and anxious. This has led to new words like "withdrawal" and "lying flat." This is the problem, and it's also why people don't want to talk about it.

I found my childhood diary while cleaning out my old house. I was a child in the mountains in the 1990s. There were only two channels on TV at home. I had never seen a playground or been to a library. I read my Chinese textbook like a storybook. My toys were little yellow clay branches and cards. It was boring compared to now. Back then, there were no video games or Internet novels. It was like the Journey to the West, which I watched every summer vacation.

I wonder why that diary entry, which described happiness, reached me even after twenty years, despite the typos. The leaves in the notebook brought me joy, but later I thought it was different from playing a mobile game. There was no audience or comparison, so the happiness was pure.

I was happier before the internet. I went to an internet cafe in high school and got a cell phone. I didn't have many friends. I read more books, but I still spent a lot of time looking at clouds, the moon, and mountains. I spent a lot of time observing the world. Even the halo of the setting sun shining on a spider's web made me happy. I haven't seen a spider's web in years.

I'm not as happy as I thought I'd be. I wanted money to buy books and spend all day in the library. I can do this by downloading a WeChat reading app. I wanted my own room with space for my things. I wanted to go wherever I wanted without asking my parents. I have these things now.

I used to be happy with what I had, but then I started seeing more and more. I realized that there were people who were better than me. I won one game, but I might lose the next. There are great players who have made tutorials, recorded their screens, and opened live broadcasts to receive countless praises, but I feel lost because I have directly faced my own "not good enough." It's not bad enough to make me give up and throw in the towel, and it's not good enough to make me content and satisfied. As the questioner said, it's not that I'm not doing well or I don't have anything, it's just that I'm "not good enough."

The internet broadens our horizons, allowing us to see glitz and glamour even when we are surrounded by bare walls at home. It allows us to stop being limited by poverty in our imagination. But this also brings pain, the pain of not being able to become what we want to be, the pain of wanting to become what we are not. It is the pain of no longer being happy with what we have, the anxiety of wanting to get what we don't have. We are chewing the cud in our mouths but we don't have the mood to savor it because the carrot is always running ahead.

Maybe we were taught to work hard. When we were young, it was just a competition to see who could learn the most. Even my primary school classmates were neighbors from the same few alleys. But now it's different. Children have to compare themselves with other children on their phones. So when you have children, you want them to succeed. Reasonable comparisons will make people work harder and strive for success. But when the goal becomes broad and elusive, it can only bring anxiety.

Even after all this analysis, you can't suddenly become happy. Just as most people who lie down flat can't do so easily, people will look at others. What should I do? I'm also looking for a solution. For now, I can only share a little insight.

When I'm unhappy, I disconnect from the present and return to a time of happiness. I might go to the mountains, watch clouds, or read a book. I disconnect to take a break and replay happy moments. This method may be difficult at first, but it's worth trying. Happiness is our right, and anxiety doesn't need constant attention. The more it intrudes, the more we have to choose happiness.

Meditation is also a good method. If you do it for ten minutes every day, it will help you feel less anxious and more joyful. I recommend it to the original poster. As long as we don't give up on happiness, happiness will never give up on us.

Dear Questioner, I am honored to have the opportunity to engage in discourse with you on this matter.

Firstly, it is notable that the term "envy" was repeated on several occasions. This immediately brought to mind a personal experience from the early stages of my professional career. A colleague overheard me expressing a sentiment of envy towards a group of college students outside the bus. She then posed the question, "How can you be certain that they are not also envying you?" At the time, I was compelled to acknowledge her viewpoint and experienced a sense of instant healing. I would like to share this experience with you in the hope that it might offer a brief moment of solace.

As I mature, I have come to recognize that envying others is a diversion from introspection. We are all distinct and irreproducible, so it is prudent to direct our attention and energy back to ourselves. It is beneficial to examine our own unique characteristics and needs and to practice self-love.

Secondly, it was noted that the subject in question made mention of "a house" and "a car," two concrete material things. It may be assumed that the subject is aware of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, and it is therefore presumed that the subject has already commenced the process of moving towards the next level of satisfaction.

Thirdly, it is my view that the concepts of happiness, anxiety, stress, and fear of loss represent a more profound examination of one's emotional state, cognitive processes, and underlying motivations. It is possible to cultivate the ability to delve into these aspects through various techniques, including meditation, reading, and educational courses. As discussed in the book "Meeting the Unknown Self," it is essential to connect with one's authentic self and pursue the joy that emanates from within, rather than relying excessively on external sources.

Ultimately, it is my hope that you will learn to live in the present, to embrace the present, and to own the present. Doing so will allow you to create a bright future, much like the joyous springtime and heartfelt joy that follows.

Hello, questioner! I'm Rose, and I'm here to listen and support you.

Your words reveal a deep distress and inner anxiety. This is a problem that almost everyone is facing right now.

Let's talk about it!

1. When we were studying, we had nothing and wanted nothing. We were certain that we would be able to buy whatever we wanted for ourselves once we started working and earning money. We felt extremely useful when we were able to provide for ourselves and our needs.

2. When we see others who don't have to work but can still live a happy life, we become unhappy because we have to work every day to get what we want. We ask ourselves why we have to work.

We envy others because we believe that we can only get what we want if we work hard. This is a key point that prevents us from being happy.

Happiness is not conditional. It can be divided into small and big pleasures. We deserve a leisurely walk, a promotion, and a pay rise. We are worthy of them.

We often form the fixed mindset that happiness is only attainable through hard work and the acquisition of material possessions. We neglect to recognize our inherent capacity for happiness in the absence of material things.

2. Having a lot of material things but unable to perceive happiness.

We have allowed ourselves to be conditionally happy, believing that happiness is conditional. This has led to a loss of ability to perceive happiness.

Life is full of anxiety and stress, which gradually erode our ability to feel joy and beauty in life.

We must recognize that we spend too much time pursuing material things. This prevents us from experiencing the natural happiness that comes without material conditions. For example, we miss out on the simple joy of a family gathering around the dinner table, chatting about happy things while eating.

Take a family vacation. Do something you've always wanted to do but never got around to.

You can find happiness in many simple things. Even a short walk can help you reconnect with yourself and feel at peace with your surroundings.

Start by experiencing the little things in life, regardless of whether you are happy or not.

3. You must properly manage your anxiety and stress.

In this materialistic society, everyone faces a lot of pressure, which of course generates a lot of anxiety. We must adjust our ways and attitudes to deal with stressful events and improve our ability to withstand pressure.

When facing anxiety, ask yourself, "Is it really that scary for something that hasn't happened yet?" Give yourself some positive suggestions and see the great power within yourself.

You are not alone. Even if you feel you cannot face it, there is always the support of family and friends.

When faced with stress, we can change our work or lifestyle, and do something relaxing after work to regulate our emotions. We can also seek help from others to find better problem-solving strategies.

When we conquer our fears, we relieve ourselves of anxiety. The more we dwell on our fears, the more anxious we become.

Often, what we fear is not what it is.

4. Fear of losing everything you have

Write down what goes through your mind whenever you feel this fear. This will help you understand why you are afraid and what you are really afraid of.

Tell me, are you afraid of accidents or death?

We must face our fears. When we do, we conquer them and continue to move forward. We can also focus on the beauty of the present moment and experience more of it.

Every problem is an opportunity for us to grow. Solving every problem is a form of self-redemption.

Questions will reveal what's holding you back from happiness and show you what truly matters. Don't be afraid of questions — what's worse is being trapped by them.

If you don't know why you're living and you don't know what makes you happy, it means you've forgotten yourself for too long. Take some time to find yourself. Figure out what you really need, what's most important to you, what you most want to do, and what you like best.

Once you know what you want, go for it! Don't limit yourself or set conditions.

Your existence is a reason for joy.

The world and I love you, and I am certain that we will meet.