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A 21-year-old male, I've been feeling a bit of a sissy lately? Strong desire for control and possession.

mild-tempered empathetic internal conflict control desire vent emotions
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A 21-year-old male, I've been feeling a bit of a sissy lately? Strong desire for control and possession. By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

I am usually very mild-tempered, gentle, considerate, and empathetic, enjoying listening to others' concerns. I have a good temperament and am well-liked, with many girls confiding in me. However, lately, I feel an inner desire to control a girl, to have a "doll-like" girl, and I want to vent my emotions, "torment" her, which feels amusing. But at the same time, my rational side strongly resists this, causing me great internal conflict. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I can't seem to help myself.

Kimberly Kimberly A total of 3434 people have been helped

Good day. From your description, I can see some of your recent confusion. Before discussing the issue, if you allow, I would like to offer my support in the form of a gesture of warmth and encouragement.

You describe yourself as "particularly gentle in character, considerate and empathetic, [and] like to listen to other people's problems, have a good temper, [and] are well liked, and many girls confide in me." These traits align with the characteristics of a highly empathetic individual. It is evident that you possess a kind and amiable personality, free from any negative traits.

As you previously stated, when you feel that you want to exert control over a woman, that you desire a submissive partner, and that you want to express your emotions in an aggressive manner, you will resist these urges.

I am curious to know how it feels to be a good person for a long time. Apart from the aftertaste of "giving roses to others leaves your hands fragrant," I believe there may be other feelings. If this is still a precious rose that you have painstakingly identified, there may be even more feelings.

You have chosen to be a kind individual who makes others feel warm, which is a result of your kindness. At the same time, it also shows that you have a strong ability to establish good relationships and interactions with others.

From a psychological perspective, your behavior of "can't help but think about it" may be a way to compensate for your long-standing role as a helper, providing support for others. This thought may also serve as a reminder that while taking care of others, you can also prioritize your own well-being.

The above represents my personal opinion for reference only. Please take care of yourself.

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Comments

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Zeus Davis A goal is a dream with a deadline.

This is really complex, feeling torn between these two sides of yourself must be incredibly challenging. It's important to recognize that wanting to control someone or "torment" them isn't healthy, and it's great that your rational side is pushing back against those feelings.

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Roy Davis Do not, for one repulse, give up the purpose that you resolved to effect.

It sounds like you're experiencing a tough internal struggle. It's crucial to address why you feel this urge to control and what might be triggering these emotions. Seeking help from a professional could provide some insight and coping strategies.

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Phyllis Miller Diligence is the voice of reason in the chaos of idleness.

I can sense the conflict you're going through. It's admirable that you acknowledge the wrongness of wanting to control someone. Perhaps exploring these feelings with a therapist can guide you towards healthier ways to channel your emotions.

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Raul Davis An honest man's path is strewn with the roses of respect.

Feeling this kind of inner turmoil is no easy feat. Your awareness of the potential harm in your desires is a strong first step. Consider finding safe outlets for your emotions, such as art or sports, and talking to someone who can offer support.

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Lorelei Bell Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.

You seem to have a lot on your mind, and it's commendable that you're aware of the negative aspects of these urges. It might be beneficial to focus on understanding where these feelings come from and working on personal growth to resolve this conflict.

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