A 34-year-old woman, why can't I control my emotions recently?

Hello, dear question asker!

I can see from your questions that you've noticed your emotions are a bit impulsive. It's totally normal! When you encounter something, you don't have time to think, and your brain instantly loses its rationality, and you immediately react. Afterwards, you may feel that you have handled some things inappropriately and that you have acted rashly.

Firstly, it's important to remember that our emotions have a cause and are closely related to external events.

It's totally normal to get emotional. We all have our own perceptions of the outside world and other people, and if the outside world and other people make us unhappy, it's only natural to feel negative emotions and feelings.

Over the past year, you've been going through a bit of a rough patch. Before, you were doing really well and didn't have much fluctuation in your emotions.

I'm wondering if something might have happened in your life over the past year? Compared to your previous life, what changes have you noticed?

Take some time to think about it and feel free to share your thoughts with me. For instance, have your expectations of life changed at all?

I'd love to hear more about your life goals. Have there been any new changes in your family or home?

For example, I'd love to know if you're happy with yourself and if you feel like you're living the life you want to be living.

And so on.

It's important to remember that emotions don't just pop up out of nowhere. They all have a reason behind them.

Secondly, it's totally normal to feel negative emotions when we feel hurt by something that's happened to us, or when we're feeling a bit down about ourselves.

Let's say someone speaks to us in a harsh tone. We might feel disrespected and unhappy and even angry. We might feel like our abilities are weak and that we can't achieve great things. We might also feel frustrated.

We feel that other people shouldn't do this, and we get really upset when they do something wrong.

It's totally normal to feel negative emotions sometimes. We all have different ways of dealing with them. Some people can tolerate negative emotions, while others can sort through these negative emotions mentally, figure out the cause of things, and adjust their own negative emotions.

Some folks have a hard time tolerating emotions, and they feel things pretty deeply, even about the tiniest things. They need to act fast to get rid of negative emotions. For instance, some people have to smash things when they get angry; otherwise, they just can't let it go.

This just shows that we could all do with a little more help when it comes to dealing with negative emotions.

3. Let's talk about how we can deal with negative emotions and adjust them.

1. When you feel like losing your temper, it's really important to take a deep breath and immediately avoid the situation that's making you angry. Go to a safe environment where you can calm down and think rationally about what happened. It's also a good idea to sort out the sequence of events and see what others have said or done that hurt you. This could be anything from your self-esteem to your sense of dignity or something you did wrong.

2. Once you've had a chance to calm down, take a moment to reflect on what happened. Think about how you felt and how you reacted. Was it because someone said or did something that made you feel offended?

3. Try to connect these emotionally charged events, find patterns, categorize them, and see what you think about them before you get negative emotions. It could be a problem with interpersonal relationships, a problem with your sense of self-worth, a problem with your self-esteem, or a problem with right and wrong. We've all been there!

4. You can absolutely grow yourself and develop your emotional management skills!

If you're still feeling stuck, don't worry! You can also make an appointment for counseling. Your counselor will be happy to help you sort through these events and work through those negative emotions.

Hello, I'm the whale social worker, and I'm here to kiss the wind with you!

If the host doesn't know how to control their emotions when they encounter something, they will always act rashly. But don't worry! There are lots of ways to help the host regulate their emotional state when they are emotional.

Take a few deep breaths to calm down. It's okay to feel emotional and to get angry sometimes. We all do! But when you feel like you're about to lose your temper, try counting your breaths to calm down.

Take a few deep breaths, then breathe in slowly through your nose, count slowly to four in your mind, and then exhale slowly, counting to four. Repeat a few times. You'll feel so much better after a few times!

I find that positive self-suggestion really helps. If I'm feeling angry about something, I'll tell myself that anger is bad for my health, that it can hurt other people, that it reveals my own shortcomings, that it doesn't help me solve problems, and that it doesn't help me grow. I find that repeating these positive suggestions to myself really encourages me and gives me positive guidance, which helps my mood to improve.

It's so important to try to put ourselves in other people's shoes. It's also good to remember to stay calm in the face of a sudden crisis and to remain unruffled when we're attacked without reason.

I try to communicate with people who know how to restrain themselves, observe their actions, and accumulate ways to deal with problems. When I encounter a problem and want to lose my temper, I first tell myself, "If I were one of those people who know how to restrain themselves, how would I handle it?"

This kind of empathy is a wonderful way to bring your thoughts back to a rational place.

Take a deep breath and count to three. When I come across a challenge that gets me all riled up and I can't seem to find a solution right away, I take a little break, step away from it, and count to three. It's a great way to reset and reframe. So, ask yourself: Is this something I need to get upset about?

What do you think will happen if I lose my temper? Usually, it doesn't take more than three minutes for the anger to subside.

Wishing you all the best! (Yixinli Whale Social Worker)