After enduring a major setback, what should I do now? Can you give me a reason to keep living?

I'd like to understand why you can't continue your studies and get psychological counseling at the same time. Make a list and compare the two options: continuing your studies or taking a break from school. This will help you identify which path has more significant obstacles and which will be relatively easier.

The person who hurt you might also be giving you a chance to meet someone who is truly good for you. Maybe you misunderstood the abandonment, or maybe you are paying for not knowing people? Or maybe there is a problem with your perception of him?

Maybe this experience will help you grow and improve your perception of people. It'll be important to not dwell on the past and look forward to a better tomorrow. You'll have to work on this every day, but you can do it.

What are the obstacles to continuing your studies? If it's your classmates, you can apply to change dormitories.

Psychological counseling can also help you figure out your relationships with your classmates, improve them, and learn to face painful things. Right now, the only thing you can do on your own is finish your studies. Your parents and classmates can't stop you from attending lectures, answering questions, and taking exams. You can do this on your own. I suggest you try it. Focus on listening, doing exercises, and taking exams, and let yourself be in control of your future. This might be the key to unlocking a bright future for you.

On top of the hurdles you've already identified, going solo could also lead to more depression. Losing your regular routine, social circle, and even the ability to see people can make it tough to cope. And of course, financial concerns and future worries can make it even harder. Based on what you've shared, I don't think you'll be able to handle it very well.

So, of these two paths, don't choose the one that is more difficult. Ultimately, you have to find the joy and anticipation of going to college again, look back on the 12 years of hard work, forget about other people and unpleasant things, and live your dream for once.

From what you've told me, it seems like you're caught in a vicious cycle that's really affecting your self-confidence. It's possible that this has already started to impact your daily life and decision-making abilities.

When you're facing these kinds of challenges, it's really important to understand your situation and face it head-on. It can feel like this cycle is trapping you, but it's also a sign that something needs to change.

I really think you should try to seek professional help and communicate honestly with your family and friends to find suitable methods and strategies to solve the problem. It's so important to be aware of the problem and take the initiative to seek a solution, believing in your ability to overcome difficulties.

It's so important to give yourself the time and space you need to gradually build up your self-confidence and adjust your mentality when you're dealing with psychological problems.

There are a few reasons why this might be happening.

It's so sad to hear about your early traumatic experiences. You mentioned being abandoned by classmates, teachers, and parents from elementary school to high school. These experiences can really take a toll on our self-esteem and sense of trust. It's understandable that you might have developed a skeptical attitude in interpersonal relationships and difficulty in establishing stable emotional connections.

2. Lack of formal psychological treatment: You mentioned that you haven't had the chance to get the help you need from a professional. It can be really hard to deal with negative emotions and stress without the right support.

3. Abandonment by an important person: You described being abandoned by the most important person in your life during your time at university. This must have been really tough for you. It's understandable that it triggered memories of past abandonment and made you feel really insecure.

It's totally understandable that this experience might make you a bit wary of relationships and make it difficult for you to form close connections.

4. How this vicious cycle affects your mind and body: This vicious cycle may cause you to experience physical reactions such as waking up in the night, feeling cold, and shaking, as well as a loss of interest in life and a desire to socialize. This situation may further exacerbate your depressive symptoms, creating a vicious cycle.

When you're facing a big decision, it's so important to be kind to yourself and make the choice that's best for you. Here are some tips to help you out:

1. Get to know yourself better: First, take the time to get to know your inner needs, values, and goals better. Through reflection and self-examination, figure out what you really want and which choice is in your long-term interests.

2. Take care of yourself! Before making a decision, it's important to regulate your emotions and stress. You can relax yourself through meditation, exercise, or talking to friends to avoid making hasty choices affected by emotions.

3. Get some help from your friends and family, or even professionals! They can give you advice from different perspectives and help you see different aspects of the problem.

4. Develop alternative plans: Before making a decision, you can develop several alternative plans and then evaluate the advantages and disadvantages of each plan and its impact on your future. This will help you consider issues more comprehensively and make an informed choice.

5. Respect your own choices: At the end of the day, no matter what you choose, you've got to respect your decision and take responsibility for it. Believe in yourself and your gut feeling, and even if you end up regretting it, try to learn from it and move on.

6. Accept challenges and risks: Making important decisions is often accompanied by challenges and risks. You've got this! Be brave enough to accept the uncertainty and believe in your ability to overcome difficulties.

Ultimately, learning and growing is what it's all about! With time and experience, you'll get better at making choices and find a path that's right for you.

I really hope you find your way through all the choices you have to make and that you succeed and grow in all the right ways.

Good morning, host. I appreciate the opportunity to address your question. Based on the information you have provided, it is evident that you are currently facing significant challenges.

I was suddenly taken ill while at university. In seeking assistance from others, I failed to recognise my own ability to support myself. I was unable to provide the support you needed at a crucial time.

There has been a five-year history of depression, with no formal treatment. The approach has been solely pharmacological, without psychological healing.

This abandonment evokes memories of being left by teachers, classmates, and parents from elementary school to high school. While they provided protection, it appears that the instances of protection were not the most significant. The moment of abandonment seems to be the most pivotal.

Now that you are in college, you have the most important person in your life at that time, who abandoned you, and was suffering from a very serious illness at the time. You recall the experience as particularly painful. You wake up almost every night in the middle of the night, feeling particularly cold and shaking all over.

I am currently uninterested in pursuing any further opportunities.

You must decide whether to take a leave of absence or continue your studies. The advantage of continuing is that the school has professional psychological teachers and you have your own medication.

There is a risk of falling behind in your studies. Furthermore, you may encounter classmates who have caused you harm, which could potentially lead to a relapse.

Furthermore, you lack the energy to manage roommates and complex interpersonal relationships. The rationale for taking a leave of absence must be approved by your parents, and you are concerned that your mental illness will affect your future.

Furthermore, following a leave of absence, hospitalization may be necessary for treatment, which is a significant financial burden. If there is a compelling reason to continue living, pursuing your studies would be the optimal choice.

From this information, I can discern that you have already made a definitive decision, but you require substantial support and encouragement from external sources to instill a sense of autonomy in the face of these potential setbacks and challenges.

I do not intend to sound like a motivational speaker reciting catchphrases and making vague statements. Regardless of whether you are isolated by your classmates, teachers, and parents from elementary school to high school, does it make you stronger and more independent each time? The process of growing up is the process of breaking away from your original family and the gradual control and bondage of your parents.

You have completed your studies at the primary school level and successfully transitioned to middle school. You have distanced yourself from your former classmates and teachers. It is important to recognize that this process is beyond your control. When you feel that you have lost control, you may experience feelings of helplessness, failure, and loneliness. However, it is essential to understand that these feelings are a result of the collaboration between you and those you have distanced yourself from. If you remain unchanged and do not grow or improve, they will not be abandoned.

This process is analogous to metabolism. As you grow and progress, individuals and circumstances that are no longer aligned with your current needs will gradually become less relevant. It's just that these individuals and circumstances have become a liability in the process of your growth, and the separation process is too harsh.

It is comparable to the process of a snake shedding its skin as it grows. This process is also quite painful and can be considered equivalent to being reborn.

If someone leaves or goes away from you, it indicates that you are growing and improving rapidly. This is the primary reason I advise you to live. It is unlikely that anyone would choose to self-destruct during a period of rapid growth.

Your tendency towards depression and asthma, as well as your experience of completely healing yourself without assistance, demonstrate a robust capacity for adaptation and adjustment to your surroundings. I am pleased to have met you in 1983, and I extend my best wishes to you and the world.

Dear Questioner, My name is Rose, and I am here to listen and provide support. Every individual's life is a unique journey, and you are a valuable and worthy person.

From your words, I can discern the pain and despair you are currently experiencing. I can also better comprehend the challenging yet resilient individual who has traversed this journey independently for so many years.

It is imperative to remember that one is never alone. Regardless of one's circumstances or personality traits, there are always individuals who wish you well and a life filled with joy and contentment. There are also always people who are willing to support and stand by your side.

The five-year period of depression must have been a challenging one for you.

Despite the discomfort, you persevered in your studies, bearing the burden of pain alone. While medication can mitigate the discomfort, it cannot fully address the underlying psychological wounds.

2. Another instance of abandonment occurred during one's college years.

The act of being abandoned by a significant other has the effect of reopening old wounds. This can be likened to the experience of a child being abandoned by a primary caregiver when they are in need of assistance.

This is akin to inflicting further injury upon an already wounded individual, thrusting them into a state of helpless despair.

You endured this challenging period of isolation and helplessness while entering university. I commend you for your resilience and self-reliance.

3. The experience of being abandoned by the university has served to exacerbate the wounds that you had already sustained.

Despite the passage of time and the ostensible resolution of the pain associated with being abandoned, you continue to experience distress on a persistent basis, exhibiting a lack of motivation and reticence to communicate.

Have you ever considered seeking professional assistance? Professional guidance can facilitate more effective coping mechanisms and facilitate healing. While the process may be challenging, with the support of a trained professional, you may find that your pain is significantly reduced. With repeated sessions, you may eventually be able to move on from past traumas.

You are a commendable individual. Despite the challenges you have faced, you have consistently demonstrated resilience and fortitude. Despite the difficulties, you have been able to identify the underlying issues and contemplate strategies for moving forward. Your strength and determination are evident.

I am prepared to accompany you on this challenging undertaking.

Despite having been abandoned at some point in the past, you have consistently demonstrated that you are worthy of love.

The fact that you were abandoned by others cannot alter the fundamental truth that you are a meaningful and valuable being, the best there is, and that you deserve to be loved.

Now that you are an adult, you have the capacity to love yourself in a more profound and comprehensive manner. You are able to discern your own desires and needs and to pursue them to the fullest extent.

Furthermore, it is imperative to prioritize self-care and maintain optimal physical health.

2. Should one be amenable to professional treatment for past traumas, it would facilitate the alleviation of distress and the commencement of a new life.

While experiences cannot be forgotten, they can be let go of. This process of letting go is an inner healing process that must be undertaken by the individual. With the help of professionals, it is possible to begin anew and create a beautiful life.

Given that you have consistently demonstrated strength and resilience, it is reasonable to conclude that you possess the capacity to adapt and evolve.

An individual who is prepared to undergo personal growth and to confront adversity is a person of considerable strength of character, capable of becoming the true self they aspire to be.

3. It seems reasonable to posit that the answer to the dilemma in question resides within the subject.

You have conducted a thorough analysis of the problem, and regardless of the decision you make, you will inevitably confront your own challenges. It would be beneficial to document each option and ascertain your true preferences.

Once an individual has a clear understanding of their desired outcome, it requires an even greater degree of courage to confront the situation and take the necessary steps to achieve it.

Regardless of the option selected, it is important to recognize that the perceived problems are largely a product of one's imagination. This imagination can often instill a sense of fear and prevent the actualization of one's true thoughts.

Indeed, the unknown invariably entails a considerable degree of uncertainty, and it is this uncertainty, coupled with our fantasies, that instills a sense of fear.

However, the reality is not as frightening as one might imagine.

When one makes a courageous decision, it is imperative to be prepared for any eventuality. Regardless of the challenges that may arise, it is essential to have faith in oneself and to strive to find solutions. It is possible to lead a fulfilling life. These experiences are crucial for personal growth.

It is imperative to view these challenges as potential avenues for skill development. By confronting and overcoming these obstacles, one can foster significant growth and enhance their resilience, equipping them with the strength and fortitude to navigate the journey ahead.

I am of the opinion that you are capable of achieving this. Given your previous experience of pain, I believe that you are able to overcome any obstacle.

The aforementioned represent my personal views. Simultaneously, I am pleased and grateful to have had the opportunity to meet you.

I extend my sincerest regards to you, and I hope that you experience a state of contentment on a daily basis.

Dear Sir/Madam, From your description, I can discern the presence of significant internal conflict, pain, and feelings of helplessness. Best regards, [Name]

As a psychological counselor, I would like to share my understanding from a psychological perspective.

Your inquiry is:

In light of the recent setback, what is the best course of action? I am seeking a compelling reason to persevere.

Good morning, teachers. I have a few additional questions. I had a sudden illness while I was in college. When I asked for help, I didn't think of relying on myself.

The individuals who were most instrumental to my success at the time were unable to provide the necessary assistance. Who do you consider the most important people here?

It was your friend or someone you considered a close associate, but that is only what you thought.

Prior to that, there was a five-year history of depression, but there was never any formal treatment. It was always just medication without psychological healing. There was also no suspension from school.

Despite the lack of formal treatment for depression, you were able to continue your studies and enter university. This is a testament to your inner motivation and resilience. It's clear that you possess the strength and determination to succeed.

Thank you for your question. I will do my best to answer it.

At this juncture, the sense of abandonment evokes memories of instances when I was similarly abandoned by classmates, teachers, and parents, from elementary school to high school. While they did offer protection, these instances of abandonment were infrequent and inconsequential. The most pivotal moment in my life was when I experienced a sense of abandonment.

This is a trauma being activated, and it is your subjective assumption that you will be abandoned by the people you love at important moments, which is causing you to experience separation anxiety.

At the time, I was facing the abandonment of a significant figure and managing a serious health condition, namely asthma. I lacked a reliable source of support. It is recommended that you seek professional psychological counseling at this pivotal moment. This will help you gain insight into the underlying emotions driving your pain.

Following my recovery, I would recall the pain for nearly two or three months. I would wake up almost every night in the middle of the night, feeling extremely cold and trembling after waking up. I lost interest in everything and was disinclined to engage in conversation.

Please describe the process you used to achieve a state of recovery. Was medication a factor? Or did you rely on self-awareness and self-healing?

Have you sought the guidance of a professional counselor?

I am currently facing a dilemma regarding my academic future. I am considering whether to continue my studies or take a break. The school has professional psychological counselors and I also have medication.

However, it can sometimes be challenging to balance academic responsibilities. Additionally, when confronted with classmates who have caused distress, there is a possibility of experiencing a reoccurrence of the trauma.

Interpersonal relationships are complex, and the dynamic with my roommate is particularly delicate. I recognize that I have room for improvement in my interpersonal skills.

I am concerned about the potential for negative reactions from others. There are helpful resources available, including your school counselor and continued medication.

Your significant other is your classmate, and you believe he has caused you distress. It is essential that you address the underlying trauma.

The latter option, taking a leave of absence from school, requires navigating the complexities of the parent-child relationship. It is evident that there is a lack of support and communication from the parents.

I am writing to inquire about the possibility of taking a leave of absence. My primary concern is whether a history of mental illness will be included in the file and potentially impact future opportunities. It is important to note that depression and anxiety are mental health disorders that are distinct from severe mental illnesses.

Furthermore, following a period of absence from your studies, should you require hospitalisation, this will undoubtedly result in significant costs. It is therefore recommended that you attend a regular hospital for an assessment and diagnosis. You are required to follow the doctor's advice with regard to medication or psychological treatment, including inpatient treatment. This is based on the doctor's advice and not on your own opinion.

If I had a compelling reason to continue my studies, I would do so without hesitation. I can see that you are driven by a strong motivation. You possess the ability to learn, independence, careful thinking, and resilience.

By applying psychoanalytic dynamics to your issues, I am curious to understand your perspective on your own situation.

Let me take this opportunity to share my understanding.

First, gain an understanding of your own character traits.

Please describe the nature of your relationship with your parents. When you encounter problems, do you choose to discuss them with them, address them independently, or do you choose the person you believe is most important to confide in? This is a topic that requires further exploration in a professional and secure counseling setting. By doing so, you will gain a deeper understanding of your inherent patterns, enhance your awareness of your perceptions, and develop a more nuanced perspective on your thoughts, which will help you resolve internal conflicts.

Secondly, it is important to accept yourself. Do you understand your strengths and weaknesses? Your independence, persistence, resilience, and tension are all your own strengths, but you have your own subjective ideas about some things and people. This is where your narcissism comes in. It is necessary to integrate subjective assumptions with an optimistic reality in order to change perceptions and relieve emotions. You can do this through reading and learning, as well as through communication, feedback, and discussion. This will help you to better understand yourself, accept your limitations, and adjust accordingly.

Third, learn to express your thoughts and feelings in words. There are good resources available to you. You must learn to express your thoughts. Only by talking can you be seen, heard, and understood, and you can then communicate and interact better. Instead of repressing and avoiding, you should address your negative feelings, which will lead to your somatic symptoms and impede your progress.

It is important to recognize that the world and I love you. In order to foster a positive and productive environment, it is essential to learn to love yourself, understand yourself, accept yourself, become more aware of yourself, and be strong and stable within. I encourage you to embrace these concepts.

Dear questioner, My name is Duoduo Lian, and I'm thrilled to be able to help and support you!

College was a challenging time for you. You suffered a serious illness and the most important, trusted friends around you left you. This stirred up a lot of memories, but it also made you stronger! You felt helpless and powerless when you had no one to accompany and support you in critical times, but you got through it!

In the past three months, I have been reliving the pain of that time. I wake up almost every night in the middle of the night, and after waking up, I feel extremely cold, shaking all over. I have no interest in anything and don't want to talk. I don't know how you survived such pain. The support of friends is so important to you.

You're facing a big decision: Should you continue your studies or take a break? If you take a break to seek medical treatment, it will be a big expense. But if you continue your studies at school, you'll be under a lot of pressure from the comments of your friends and classmates. So, if you want to cry, just cry out loud! Such days are too difficult. But at this critical moment, you also need to sort things out.

As you said yourself, it's about survival. What can you do to survive? Focus on the present! After all, there are still options. Both paths are difficult, but you can do it! Otherwise, all the hard work you've done before will be ruined.

You feel lost, but you're going to find your way!

Not accepting it may make you suffer more. But there's no need to worry! The worst outcome is being gossiped about by your classmates and having to pay a lot of medical expenses at home, which you really don't want. But no matter what, this is also a way to go!

There is a way to go, so set your mind firmly and go!

What can you do in the present to make yourself happy and joyful? You are not alone, and you've got this! Everyone has their own worries, but you've survived five years of depression, and you know the solution. You know better than anyone else how to do it. Taking a temporary break is also to make the future more stable.

It's true that you need a strong heart at school. It's natural to want to keep your vulnerable side hidden from others, but remember, you're stronger than you think! People will inevitably gossip, but you can choose not to engage with it. You have the power to choose your own path. Do you agree?

Ultimately, the root of the problem is that you care a lot about the support of the most important people, which is great! I'm sure the other person has struggled and the choice was difficult, but you made the best decision for you.

It's also a great reminder that the most important people in your life are your crutches. It's time to start relying on yourself! When the crutches leave, you'll be ready with your inner strength.

Once you throw away your crutches, you can start moving forward again! This is something to think about.

If you feel unhappy, it's time to find all the resources you can to help you! Open your heart, find a trusted friend to talk to, and seek support from professionals.

After all, being alive is the key! Everything else can only be left to chance.

Asthma has had a big impact on you, causing pain both physically and mentally. What is the real reason? Let's find out together!

Do you want others to care for you? Absolutely! And you can do something about it. There's anger inside you, which causes your physical condition to deteriorate. But you can resolve this, and both your physical and psychological conditions will improve!

You said that you have rarely been abandoned before, but this time you have been abandoned by someone important. This has triggered your trauma, and you believe that you are unimportant, unworthy, and unloved. But you are so much more than that!

When I get sick, others abandon me. I am so powerless. I have never paid attention to myself. This is also a reminder to you that you are important. I am the master of my life. Listen to the voice inside you. Connect with your body. If you don't care for your body, even your breathing will go against you. But you know what? You can change that! You can take control of your life and your health. You are important, and you matter. So start listening to that voice inside you and start connecting with your body. You'll be amazed at what you can achieve!

Illness is also a great reminder that if you don't value yourself, you will be punished.

The past is just that—the past! People are on a journey, and the people around them are actually also just passing through. It is only normal to have good times and bad times. The only one who can support you is yourself. So, enjoy being alone and accept the impermanence of life!

You've already been through some tough times, so go for it!

Best of luck!

Hello, question asker!

You wrote at the end that you saw that I was right.

I would absolutely continue my studies if I had a good reason to live.

I see a college student with a pleading look in his eyes, desperately seeking a reason to find himself and continue to persevere with his studies. I know you still have the motivation to continue your studies. It's good for you, but what is the reason to live?

I am not you, and I do not have your experience and background. I would like to completely switch places with you. If I encountered the same thing as you, I would do this.

What happened to me was different from what happened to you, but I felt just as disappointed. The other person wasn't there to help. I felt like the sky was falling, and life was hopeless. I was wrapped up in that person. Imagine losing the support of your other half. How could you live in the world? It was desperate.

Think about those dark days, those unbearable times. Every minute and every second was really like having your heart bleed. At that time, I wanted to live because I loved my parents, who loved me. Since I was young, I saw my parents working in the fields, and I knew how hard it was to raise children. I knew that if I went to school and studied hard, I could let my parents live a good life in the future, free from poverty. As a child, I felt that since my body came from my parents, I should take care of my body for their sake. I would never let my elderly parents worry about their children, and I would never let their gray-haired parents die before their black-haired children. That kind of pain is really heartbreaking. Today, I heard about such a terrible thing that happened in a family, where the only child under 30 lost his life. I am still very uneasy about it.

There is another reason that I think is even more important, and that is that we are beautiful and should be loved by ourselves. In the World War II film Schindler's List, there is a line that says, "A moment's life is also life." That was said by the woman to the child after she was rescued. We must cherish our own lives because a moment's life is also beautiful.

This is how I think about you from my personal experiences and feelings. From your written description, I can also see where your personal potential lies. You said that this important event you experienced after going to university was a major blow to you. You see, when you had a sudden illness, a tendency to asthma, and were ignored by an important other person, the hurt, disappointment, and injustice in your heart were unimaginable. But in the end, you won, you prevailed, and you overcame the illness. This proves the huge unseen potential within you.

Afterwards, you reflect on the pain and the feeling of unbearable pain is really a process that must be experienced. You just can't get over it in your heart. Why did that person you considered so important do that at such an important moment? In our perception, that was really the most inappropriate thing to do. But as time goes by, our perceptions will also change. If you think about those moments in the past that you once considered abandonment, whether it was your parents or friends, you'll see that your perception at that time was not as deep and clear as your current perception.

I am certain that this matter will gradually fade in the future, just like me now. When I think of the past, I know that the fatal moment was really when I felt that other people's actions were just normal, that it was their duty not to help, and that I was just too sentimental. I can still remember a classmate saying something like, "It's normal to be heartbroken. Who hasn't been heartbroken before? Now that I think about it, it was really my own problem. I overreacted, and I really shouldn't have done that."

I believe that when things have passed, your perception will also change. I also wonder if this important moment is related to our own perception. You say that your parents and friends have always protected you, but sometimes abandoned you in important moments.

You may not always be able to tell when they're protecting you, but you will know when they go against your wishes.

I'm not denying you did the right thing at the right time. I just think our perceptions change all the time. One thing is for sure: if we keep learning, our perceptions will change. You came here to ask questions and find solutions. I think your thinking will be opened up, and you'll have different ideas.

If I follow this logic, I know that now, if you can overcome your fear with a little wisdom, you can stop waking up in the middle of the night or waking up less often. You can persevere in school. You can solve whatever problems you encounter on the way.

You can do this. As long as you are determined and don't leave yourself any room for retreat, and face all the problems along the way, just as you did when you had this attack and didn't think you could solve it yourself, I know you can make a breakthrough. There will be more and more ways for you to solve problems on your own that you never thought possible.

You can do it. I believe in you, so keep up the good work. The world and I love you!

The incredible journey of self-growth and transformation is all about discovering how to truly love others, correcting your energy field, and avoiding or alleviating negative emotions.

To truly love others is to wish them happiness and accept or forgive everyone, the outstanding, the ordinary, and the weak mentally. If there are mistakes or shortcomings, then they can be corrected. Everyone has the right to happiness, no matter how close or distant the relationship is, whether it is right or wrong, gain or loss. We all hope that others can be happy! People can bring each other spiritual comfort and even joy. It is good to love and accept others and yourself, to tolerate shortcomings and lack of ability, and to be kind at heart. In other words, it is beneficial to others or society, not to despise or reject ordinary people, not to be jealous or intolerant of outstanding people.

If you don't get along with most people, it can lead to negative energy and negative emotional problems. But don't worry! You can easily correct your energy field to find and have a loving and suitable relationship and career. And you can share and exchange what you see, hear, think, feel, or are interested in with others in real life and on the Internet, such as Douban communities.

And don't forget to love your life and be happy with the little things!

Your physical health is affected by negative energy, so it's important to keep your body comfortable and healthy! Give yourself a full-body massage to feel your best. The head massage includes the forehead and face, which also have meridians. Massage the head with deep, firm strokes, and massage the stomach with a firm massage brush. Do not massage the stomach on an empty stomach, and then take a walk!

If you have negative emotions, thoughts, or behaviors, you will not feel comfortable physically or mentally. You will often encounter unhappy people and things, interpersonal conflicts, relationship and marriage problems (which will affect your magnetic field), and even problems in your academic or career life. But there is a way to change all of that! When you are too self-centered or pursue self-interest, you accumulate a lot of negative energy. The more self-centered you are, the more your magnetic field will be out of sync with other people's. But you can learn how to truly love others and adapt to people and things, so as to correct your energy field, resolve conflicts, improve your emotions and interpersonal relationships, and better solve the above problems. In addition, if you know how to truly love the people and things in the world, you will not be too attached to love, and you will be able to alleviate negative emotions such as separation anxiety and pain. You will not feel lacking inside, and you will be able to feel happiness. And that is how your life can become fulfilling and meaningful!

And if necessary, they can also help those around them grow and change together!

The way in which excessive self-centeredness manifests itself varies from person to person, which makes it an exciting topic! There are so many different psychological motivations that drive us to pursue self-satisfaction, compete for self-importance, suppress self-deprecation and ingratiate ourselves, give unreservedly in order to gain, and even fear losing. Being too narcissistic or inferior, paying too much attention to oneself, generating stress and worry, social phobia, being caught up in one's own emotions and thoughts, attaching too much importance to what others think of oneself, not accepting one's own shortcomings and deficiencies, striving for one's own perfection, being obsessive, controlling, possessing others or forcing others to satisfy oneself, otherwise resenting and being discontent, being unable to let go of oneself to forgive and forgive, brooding—these are just a few of the fascinating ways in which excessive self-centeredness can manifest!

If you only pursue the self, you'll end up feeling anxious, depressed, and tired. You might even struggle to adapt to the people and things in your school or workplace environment. But if you truly love others and adapt to people and things, you'll naturally look down on the self and restore positive energy!

In short, go for it, do good, and help others!

A hug for you first! You'll get through this.

It's normal to feel this way. It's natural to feel pain and confusion when faced with such a challenge. Your value and future depend on your choices and actions, not on others.

Here are some ideas to help you live and continue your education.

1. Counseling: School counseling can help you deal with past trauma and current stress. You can also find a counselor outside of school, especially one who specializes in trauma treatment.

2. Treatment plan: If you have depression or anxiety, medication and psychotherapy are usually the best treatments. Make sure your treatment plan is complete and that you talk to a mental health professional often.

3. Self-care: Get enough rest, eat right, and exercise. These help your mood and overall health.

4. Build a support system. If you feel your relationship with your housemates is delicate, consider finding new accommodation or joining a support group.

5. Get professional advice if you're worried about how taking a break will affect your future.

6. Think long term. Taking time off may help your long-term health and success. Don't be afraid. You are not alone.

7. Future planning: Think about your future goals and how you can achieve them. Break these goals down into small steps and focus on progress at each step.

8. Legal advice: If you are worried that a break from studies will affect your future job, you can ask a lawyer about your rights.

9. Find a belief that gives your life meaning and hope.

10. Take small steps: Set a small goal for each day, such as finishing a school assignment, taking a short walk, or talking with a friend. These steps can help you regain control.

11. Take action step by step. Don't try to solve everything at once. Break your goals down into small steps and take action.

Every step is a step forward.

12. Get help with money if you need medical care but are worried about the cost. Ask your school if there are any programs that can help.

13. You matter. Your life has value and meaning.

You can overcome difficulties, achieve your dreams, and make a positive impact.

Your value is not defined by others. It is defined by you. Live your life, follow your dreams, and give love and support to others.

Don't give up. You deserve help and a better life.

Hello. I am happy to answer your questions and I am confident that my suggestions will be helpful to you.

You are in a very good state right now. You can self-monitor and sort things out in a timely manner, find ways to get help, and explore several paths for the future.

You should do both at the same time. Get help from a mental health teacher at school, an outside doctor or counselor, or tell your parents about the situation. You also need to understand and plan for everything. If you can, do it all at the same time.

The first thing we must do is tell our parents what's going on with our health. They'll take us to the hospital for a detailed examination so they can understand our current condition and the state the disease has reached.

When we see the doctor, we must ask about our current situation. We need to know if we need inpatient treatment, if we can rest at home, or if we need to undergo treatment in a leisurely manner. Then, we will resume school after the situation improves.

Seek help from the school's mental health teacher. If the teacher determines that your situation is serious, they can arrange for home-school contact, intervene with your parents, and arrange for you to be taken to the hospital for a detailed examination. During this process, the teacher will also educate the parents on the severity of the situation and the need for further examination.

If our current situation is extremely bad and we need to take a break from school to recuperate, then we must take a break from school and stay at home. We will adjust our physical condition with the assistance of a doctor or psychologist.

A leave of absence from school simply means not going to school. It does not mean that we have given up on learning. We can and should still study at home when our physical condition is still relatively good. We can even review previous lessons to make sure we don't forget. This will be beneficial for us when we return to school later.

If our current situation is still manageable according to the doctor's comprehensive judgment and we don't need to take a leave of absence, we can and should keep this method and continue to attend classes at school. At the same time, we must also follow the doctor's advice and actively cooperate with treatment.

We must not allow psychological and mental illnesses to affect enrollment or work. These illnesses are no different from any other illness we commonly have. They are equal to everyone, and they are equal. It is not because they belong to the psychological or mental category that they are different from some other internal medicine and surgery.

I am confident that through the testing and judgment of professionals, I will be able to find an intervention method that suits you and will not affect your daily life, physical health, or study plans.

The world and I love you!

Hi, I'm Fly, your heart exploration coach. Life is a beautiful journey, not for appreciation, but for growth.

They hug you tenderly, and you can feel their pain through the screen. You need help most now, but a classmate you considered very important has "abandoned" you. You're facing a dilemma: should you continue or suspend your studies? Let's explore how to find the confidence to move forward with determination.

1. You see the resources and motivation you already have within yourself. The real reason for this major setback is

You've done a great job of self-analysis. You had a sudden illness in college, and you were counting on that classmate who was very important to you to help you out, stick by you, and support you through the difficult time, but he let you down.

I don't know all the details, but from what you said, it seems like you felt abandoned when your dad didn't help you out. It's like you felt hurt on a psychological level, not that he actually hurt you or that you were physically hurt.

As you mentioned later, this "psychological feeling" is familiar to you. It's the neglect, indifference, criticism, and denial you suffered from your parents, teachers, and classmates during your growth process. And this student's behavior has once again activated that "feeling" you once had.

The emotional needs we look for from others but can't get are really psychological needs we didn't get from our parents. So, this student isn't wrong, and neither are you or your parents.

The mistake was that your parents didn't know how to love and protect you back then. They may not have had good role models themselves, and that's something they've had to work through as parents.

You've found the "cure" for your "heart disease." Your parents affirm, understand, and accept you, which means you're seen and loved well by them.

And you can also be your own "significant other" and provide yourself with "psychological nutrition"—self-affirmation, self-acceptance, self-appreciation, and so on. You know that your parents are first and foremost human beings with their own limitations. You can see your parents' imperfections and the harm they have unintentionally caused you.

It's also worth noting that your classmate isn't really abandoning you. This is just your own feeling, and it's worth considering it as a possibility. Can you think of any other possibilities?

For instance, Ta couldn't get away at the time, Ta also had problems, and Ta had concerns that shouldn't have come up. At the very least, you can see there are more possibilities and that it's not just your fault or Ta's fault, but also other reasons.

2. For the two options you've come up with, make the best and most optimal choice.

Keep up with your studies. Use the school psychologist. Worried you can't handle schoolwork and therapy at the same time? Worried a classmate is causing you secondary trauma? Having trouble getting along with roommates?

If you're considering suspending your studies, you'll need to get parental consent. You might also be worried about the cost of hospitalization and the fact that mental illness is recorded in the file.

When it comes to academic studies and physical and mental health, it's clear that health is still the best choice. No matter how many zeros there are in the number 10,000,000, they still need to be followed by a value, and that value is our health.

You can get help from a counselor or school psychologist, talk to your parents, and come to an agreement as a family. Parents love their kids, they just need some guidance. Cost is a concern for parents, and earning money is their responsibility.

Depression is a kind of psychological disorder. With the improvement of the standard of living, it now accounts for a high proportion. If you take a break from school due to depression, it won't be recorded in your file, so you can rest assured.

You can usually adjust your mood and state of mind by listening to music, meditating, writing, or reading psychology books to distract yourself from thinking about everything. I'd recommend "Living the Meaning of Life," "The Power of Self-Growth," "The Terrific Me," and "Lifelong Growth." And Jia Ling's "Hot and Spicy" is worth a look too.

I hope this is helpful to you. I love you and I hope the world loves you too.

If you'd like to keep the conversation going, you can follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service."

Hello, I am Coach Yu from Xin Tan, and I would love to discuss this topic with you!

As the saying goes, "an illness comes like a landslide, but goes like a slow process of silk unwinding." The great news is that very often, it is not that physical illnesses cannot be treated, but rather that our psychological wounds need time to heal.

As the original poster wrote, for the past two months, I have been reliving the pain of that time, shaking all over, and unable to take interest in anything.

Let's dive deep and ask ourselves: What was the scene like when I thought about being abandoned in the past? What were my thoughts?

And what emotions and feelings did it bring up in me?

And we can also ask ourselves: what was the scene like when I thought that the important people in college had abandoned me? What were my thoughts?

And what emotions and feelings did it bring up in me?

And we can ask ourselves what we want to say to ourselves about these experiences! What does it make me think of?

What are my worries?

We can try to reconcile with our emotions. When such distressing emotions arise, we can calmly observe them without judging them. We can let the emotions come and go freely like clouds, drifting away slowly like leaves in the water. We can also try to record what our feelings are at the moment!

Your writing is for you, so go ahead and write about your feelings! Be honest and open, and you'll be amazed at how much it helps. You'll understand your emotions better and see the root causes of your problems more clearly.

We can also try using an empty chair, role-playing, and self-dialogue to create a safe situation and atmosphere. This is a great way to connect the past with our current state of mind and allow chaotic thoughts to be consciously integrated, so that negative emotions can be released.

Let's talk about loving yourself!

The questioner mentioned some of the difficulties they face in continuing or suspending their studies, and these are real problems. But there is a solution! We can try talking to ourselves first: What kind of state do I want to live in to make myself happy?

When we are clear about our needs, we can continuously improve our resilience and ability to heal from trauma—and we can do it!

Second, it's time to let go of our self-esteem and narcissism! Reach out to the outside world and join some school clubs or activities to distract ourselves. Practicing our abilities and knowledge in real-life interactions will gradually improve our ability to withstand trauma.

Absolutely! We can also find an appropriate time to communicate with our parents, express our concerns and thoughts honestly, and listen to what they expect from us. We believe wholeheartedly that the love and care of our family can also help us face difficulties.

We absolutely must encourage and care for ourselves! We should never be too hard on ourselves. We need to allow ourselves to be true to ourselves. We must acknowledge and accept the trauma. We should always maintain physical and mental health. We should give ourselves time and space to accept and believe that life is a process of continuous experience.

Absolutely! We can also seek help. If this thing is bothering you, it is not easy to overcome it immediately. But you can do it! Try to find a family member or friend you trust and who has always given you positive support to talk to. If you feel it is necessary, you can also find a counselor. Emotions must have an outlet to relieve the heaviness and blockage in our hearts.

If you need to, go to the hospital to get your physical condition checked out again. It'll put your mind at ease and reassure your family!

I highly recommend reading "The Biography of Su Dongpo," an incredible biography of a truly great writer!

Hello! I'm Zhang Qi, and I'm here to help. From your description, I can tell you're feeling a bit overwhelmed, but I'm here to bring you warmth and help. I can see your fear, worry, and confusion about the future, but I'm excited to help you analyze the current situation and find solutions.

First of all, give yourself a big, warm hug! It's really not easy to bear so much hardship, and I applaud your strength.

The decision you are facing is a major life challenge, and the process can be filled with confusion and anxiety. I can feel your inner struggle and pain, but I know you can do it! It is not easy, but you can do it!

It takes a lot of courage and wisdom to weigh up the pros and cons of various options – and you've got this!

Facing such challenges is an amazing opportunity to grow! Take some time for yourself to think. You can also share your worries with family and friends, who may give you some unexpected advice or support.

You can also try to recall the good times to give yourself some positive energy. Sometimes it feels much easier to talk about problems, so go for it!

If you feel that you need some time to adjust, then go for it! During this period, you can try some new activities or hobbies to get back to enjoying life.

And don't forget to take care of your amazing body and mind! Get plenty of rest, fuel your body with delicious, healthy food, and move your body with some fun, regular exercise.

Second, no matter what decision you ultimately make, have confidence in yourself! Believe in your ability to overcome difficulties and meet all the challenges of the future. You can do it!

When you're facing challenges in life, remember to stay positive! Believe in yourself and know that you can overcome any difficulty. Give yourself positive affirmations and encouragement, as they can give you incredible strength!

You said that if you had a good reason to live, you'd keep studying. And that's a great attitude to have! Life is all about finding out what it means to you. It's a wonderful journey that lets us feel the wonder and beauty of life all the time. By trying new things, we can learn and grow. What you're going through now is just a part of life. I'm sure that when the suffering is over, you'll see how precious life is and understand what it means to live!

Finally, don't be afraid to seek help from a counselor! They are professional and experienced, and can help you better handle emotional problems. They can also provide you with practical advice and skills to help you better cope with life's challenges.

In short, no matter which path you choose, believe in your ability to overcome difficulties. Every challenge in life is an opportunity to grow! Believe that you can learn and grow from it, becoming stronger and more confident.

You are not alone! There are so many people around you who care about you and are ready to support you through this difficult time.