Before returning home to visit my family, I was fired. How should I adjust my emotions? How should I tell my family?

Hello, I'm a Heart Explorer coach, Gu Daoxi Fengshou Slender Donkey.

Seeing family across the ocean is special. Parents are getting older, and you may not see them as often as you'd like. The questioner may focus on this family visit.

In modern society, resigning and being fired are both common. This may mean the company and the individual are not a good match. The sooner the problem is exposed, the sooner it can be changed. Thinking this way, will it make the questioner feel a little more relaxed?

Why are the questioner's emotions up and down? Could it be that they can't accept being fired?

Being laid off is humiliating. It makes us feel like we aren't good enough.

I was bad at my job when I started, so my boss asked me to change positions. I felt ashamed and stayed in my position.

Is the questioner's mood affected by the job search? When we set New Year's resolutions, we're also full of energy.

When we have a clear goal, we are full of fighting spirit. When we encounter resistance, we become depressed. This is normal. Many people give up because they don't get enough positive feedback.

The questioner plans to find a new job in 3-6 months, which should be manageable. Maybe you can try to change your perspective. People in the workplace are busy, so why not enjoy a vacation?

Why does the questioner want a job? Is it because they don't feel secure?

Are you bored at home? Do you think you can't find a good job?

Knowing why you're uneasy can help.

In today's world, you can find work no matter what you do. If you have other options, you're more secure. Many people say that if you can't make it, go home and inherit your family business. If there's no suitable job abroad, you can go home to be with your family and find a job that doesn't require much.

It's hard to make decisions. The hardest part is changing our minds. When we accept and reconcile with ourselves, we feel less anxious.

You should tell your elders you're unemployed if you're good at lying. Otherwise, tell them the truth. They'll know you're troubled just by the way you sit.

Home is a safe haven, with unconditional love from parents. The questioner doesn't have to assume they'll be disappointed. They can ask hypothetically to test the attitude. The result might be different.

Why do the old people in China want you to stay? Maybe they want your company.

Or is the questioner not ready to return to China? Ask yourself, and imagine what it would be like to find a job there now. This might help the questioner understand things better.

Read: "A Change of Heart," "Cognitive Awakening," "The Third Alternative."

Best wishes!

I can see the conflict and confusion in the questioner's heart. He is torn between two opposing forces. On the one hand, he is faced with the warm welcome of his family. He feels that he cannot tell them that he is currently unemployed. On the other hand, he is worried that if his family finds out the truth, they may not be able to accept it. He is afraid that their enthusiasm for him may disappear. He is concerned that he will lose face.

This is how you should look at it.

First and foremost, the family welcomes the questioner himself. They care about his return, not about his employment status or the quality of his work. Of course, the family is happy if the questioner is doing well outside, and they probably won't care too much if he isn't doing so well. After all, this is the questioner's own business, although some people may care about it.

The original poster has now returned. Given that life abroad was not good, it is likely that life will be better now that he has returned.

Second, as the saying goes, paper cannot wrap up fire, and a fake will always be a fake. It will be revealed one day, and when that happens, it will be even more embarrassing. It is better to be honest and straightforward. However, being honest about this matter does not mean telling everyone you meet; you only tell others if they ask. After all, this is your personal business, so you can tell others if you want to, or not if you don't.

The questioner has high expectations of himself but lacks sufficient acceptance of the real self, especially a strong rejection of some of the shortcomings. Let me be clear: no one is perfect. We all have both strengths and weaknesses. Our strengths can help us live a good life, and our weaknesses can also reduce a lot of trouble for us. They all help a lot in our lives.

In the face of these things, you must accept your own shortcomings just as you accept your own strengths. Allow yourself to have these deficiencies so that your life will be more exciting and carefree. These are my personal views and are for the questioner's reference only.

Greetings. I am a heart exploration coach. Life is a beautiful journey, not for appreciation, but for blossoming.

I empathize with your predicament and the internal strife it engenders. On the one hand, there is the homesickness that accompanies a prolonged absence, and on the other, the distress that arises from the loss of one's employment. Let us engage in a discourse and exchange of ideas on this matter.

?1. It may be advisable to seek the counsel of a third party.

Although work is a private matter, it can serve as a means of relaxation and familial connection when one is able to discuss it and express their feelings.

It is understandable that your concerns are justified, and they will likely result in your family members becoming anxious about your well-being, exacerbating their distress about your presence in a foreign country, and even encroaching upon your personal affairs.

In response to this, the manner of communication, the nature of the discourse, and the specific content of the discourse are the primary determinants of the extent to which one can elicit support and understanding from family members. For example, a sentence such as "I'm in the process of adjusting to work" is a tactful way to express oneself that will not lead to an inordinate number of inquiries from family members.

Should one desire assistance, comprehension, and aid, it is possible to engage in discourse with friends who are of a similar age and with whom one shares a close bond. The adage "two heads are better than one" holds true in this context, as it allows for the acquisition of additional perspectives on the matter at hand and the identification of a viable solution.

2. It is important to allow and accept all of one's emotions.

My circle of friends once espoused two enduring tenets: that life is an unstoppable forward trajectory and that discouragement is futile; and that life is akin to an electrocardiogram, with smooth progression indicating a terminal state.

It is inevitable that individuals will encounter difficulties and setbacks throughout their lives. However, it is precisely because we have experienced these challenges that we have been able to lead rich and colorful lives.

From your written account, it is evident that you have formulated a plan and adopted a positive attitude towards your future. Your intention to secure alternative employment within a three-to-six-month timeframe is commendable and demonstrates your psychological resilience.

It is not uncommon to experience a range of emotional states, including feelings of low mood and elevated mood. These emotional responses are normal and should be acknowledged. It is beneficial to focus on the present day and recognise the autonomy, agency and control that you have in your life.

The emotions in question also manifest as a desire for recognition, affirmation, comprehension, and acceptance. Some preconceived notions cause individuals to suppress their emotions and feelings, yet this repression can lead to a proliferation of intense emotions.

3. It is recommended that one live in the present and experience everything as it happens.

One may cultivate and exercise the ability to meditate through meditation and Zen practice, thereby becoming more present in the moment and reawakening one's original wisdom. This allows for a greater capacity to perceive and engage with new life opportunities and challenges with clarity and awareness.

This period of time without work should be regarded as an "idle window period," which may be likened to shifting gears in a car. Before shifting gears, the vehicle should be placed in neutral. Whether moving forward or backward, adjustments can be made in neutral.

It is recommended that you fully enjoy the happiness and warmth of being reunited with your family while also allowing yourself to adjust your state of mind. It is important to note that even if you have not yet quit your job, you should continue to pay attention to work at all times. In the eyes of your family members, your computer operations should appear to be normal.

It is recommended that you read "5% Change" and "The Power of Self-Growth." You will undoubtedly encounter these texts at some point in your life.

It is my sincere hope that the aforementioned advice will prove beneficial to you. I extend my warmest regards to you, and I wish you well.

Should you wish to pursue this discussion further, you are invited to follow my personal homepage, entitled "Heart Exploration Service."

Hello! I'm Bai Li Yina, and I'm excited to help you with your question.

The questioner confided that he lost his job before returning to China. He is excited to start anew and is eager to share his journey with his family. He is a little nervous about their reaction, but he is confident that they will be understanding and supportive. How should he adjust his state of mind to face his family?

[Situation analysis]

You were really looking forward to going home to visit your family and enjoying your vacation, but now that you've lost your job, you're facing the challenge of finding a new one. Don't worry, though! You've got this. And we're here to support you. Here's a warm hug for you.

You have a great balance between work and family! Let's dive into the reasons that make you suffer:

1. Losing your job suddenly is a challenge, but you'll get through it!

2. You are afraid that your family will worry about you and be disappointed in you.

3. You're excited to find a job and spend time with your family, but you're also a little nervous about how it will work out.

4. You don't want to pretend to be happy.

5. You can't respond to your family's enthusiasm with the same enthusiasm — but you can respond with enthusiasm of your own!

[Questions for further thought]

1. What do you think your family expects of you?

2. Just imagine for a moment that you hadn't lost this job. How would you feel about facing them?

3. Absolutely not! Your family's love and care for you will only grow stronger if you stay abroad for development.

4. If you haven't lost your job, do you love it? How long do you think you'll be able to do it?

[Recommended methods to try]

1. The great news is that very few people work for just one company for their entire lives. Changing jobs is actually a very common and ordinary thing. Part of your anxiety comes from being suddenly laid off this time. In a poor market economy, being laid off may actually be a normal operation of the company to save costs.

You can absolutely find out the specific reasons for this layoff and adjust accordingly by analyzing the situation.

2. Look for your next job with anticipation, not with depression. Summarize what you gained from your previous job and actively prepare yourself mentally for the new job and environment. This will also help you escape from your current depressed mood.

3. There's absolutely no reason why going home to visit relatives and looking for a job can't coexist! It's just a case of you being afraid of something that hasn't even happened yet. We all know that life isn't always plain sailing, but worrying about problems before you even encounter them is only going to affect your enthusiasm and dampen your enthusiasm for going home. Focus on the present! All you need to do is go home to visit relatives and actively submit your resume to find a job. There's absolutely no reason why you can't do both!

4. Whether or not to tell your family the truth, and how to do it, depends on your understanding of their expectations. Telling them with enthusiasm that you are changing jobs and telling them with frustration that you have lost your job, the important thing is not the change of job, but your state, your true state. Fake smiles cannot necessarily hide the fact that you are not doing well. But you can choose to focus on the positive!

Once you've adjusted your state, you can then decide whether or not to tell them!

I really hope these methods help you!

You've got this! Change takes time and patience, but you can do it. Don't worry or be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems, but you're stronger than you think.

The world and I are with you, and we're rooting for you! I wish you an early solution to the fog in your heart and a path to your own most comfortable state.

A big thank you to everyone who has liked and responded to me! I wish you all peace and joy!

Good day. I am a heart exploration coach, and I am pleased to be able to offer you some advice.

From your written description, I can understand your situation quite well. When someone returns from abroad, they often hope to appear radiant and bright to their family, who may be concerned about their well-being.

You are a highly filial individual with aspirations to make a name for yourself in the workplace or in your field. You have consistently set this goal for yourself, but circumstances have not aligned as anticipated.

Prior to your return to China, you were terminated from your position. At the time, I believe this was a sudden and unexpected development.

You had high expectations of returning to your home country with honor and reuniting with your loved ones. However, you are now experiencing a sense of loss. You are unsure if you should conceal this emotion or reveal it to your family to help share the burden.

I will now provide a detailed description of your current emotional state in response to your question.

Your recent emotional state has been variable. At times, you have experienced feelings of discouragement, yet at other times, you have felt motivated. You have indicated your intention to secure employment within the next three to six months.

Therefore, your emotional state will fluctuate in accordance with your job search. Initially, you will experience a sense of elation upon receiving contact from a potential employer. However, after submitting numerous applications, you may encounter a lack of response or discover that a few opportunities are not aligned with your qualifications. This can lead to feelings of discouragement.

It is important to consider this emotion objectively.

Following your dismissal, I believe your self-esteem was adversely affected, leading you to question your own exceptionalism. This raises the question of why you were the one let go.

I understand that discussing the circumstances of your dismissal is a sensitive topic for you. However, to facilitate emotional adjustment, it is essential to provide a detailed account of the incident, including the underlying causes, the sequence of events leading up to it, and the ultimate outcome. Please organize the information in a clear and concise manner.

The reason for your dismissal was due to the nature of your work, the company you were employed by, and the circumstances surrounding your departure.

This practical content will enable us to assist you in managing your emotions more effectively.

If the company is facing closure or layoffs, or if the current economic situation is causing difficulties, then being made redundant is a distinct possibility.

Is it truly your fault? The answer is no.

It is not a question of your abilities, but rather the impact of external factors that have resulted in this outcome.

Not having a job can create feelings of unease. You were anticipating planning your future career, but now your plans have been disrupted, and you must consider your options carefully.

This will undoubtedly have a significant impact on you. Please describe the specific events that have transpired, as well as your interpersonal relationships in the workplace and your career plans. Organize the text carefully, click on my personal homepage, and ask me questions. I will be able to provide more detailed assistance.

You have made plans for yourself, which is an admirable quality. It demonstrates that you still have high expectations for the future. However, since some of your plans have not yet been realized, it is necessary to return to China with an unemployed self.

If you return to China, it is understandable that you want to be happy every day and spend time with your family. However, as a family, it is important to share both happy and sad times together.

You are determined to persevere, but your current emotional state is not conducive to success.

Regarding your job search, you may inform your family, but do not unduly concern them. You are already sending out your resume and interviewing, so they will have no reason to doubt your ability to succeed.

It is important to remember that your family has placed a great deal of trust in you. As long as you are working hard and making progress, and if you ever need help, you can inform your family in advance.

In that case, I do not anticipate significant interference with your plans.

The first step is to address your feelings about being fired and any resulting low mood. We will then determine the best way to communicate with your relatives and family.

This will allow you to accompany them happily and, with their support and expectations, find a suitable job. The decision of whether to develop yourself abroad or domestically is yours to make, as it is your life.

Furthermore, you have endured significant challenges abroad for an extended period. It is evident that you possess remarkable abilities and strengths, which should be celebrated. It is now time to enjoy a well-deserved break, free from the constraints of work that have previously disrupted your family gatherings. This is a unique opportunity to reflect on and process your experiences abroad over the past few years. I encourage you to make the most of this opportunity.

I will await your reply and we can discuss the other specific matters in detail.

I wish you the best of luck.

Dear colleague, I empathize with your predicament. It is not uncommon to experience fluctuations in mood when confronted with the demands of life.

You are currently seeking new employment, which is a challenging process that can also bring stress and anxiety. Concurrently, you are dealing with your relationship with your family. You want to maintain your independence, but also do not want to cause them undue concern.

This internal conflict and struggle is something that many people encounter during their growth process. You are trying hard to find a balance, which is commendable.

It is not uncommon for individuals to experience fluctuations in mood when confronted with significant life transitions, such as a change in employment. Your intention to secure a new position within a three-to-six-month timeframe is a commendable goal. However, it is important to recognize that such a transition can also give rise to stress and anxiety.

However, it should be noted that "painful memories" may trigger depressive emotions, which is a common psychological reaction in humans.

In regard to your relationship with your family, your comment that "if I don't tell them, they'll worry that I'm having a hard time putting on a fake smile every day" demonstrates your concern for your family and your honesty about your feelings. Concurrently, you are also concerned that disclosing this information may cause them unnecessary distress.

This challenge of balancing family expectations with personal feelings is one that many people encounter as they mature.

When we share information about our work with others, we may be seeking understanding and support, hoping to gain recognition and affirmation. Conversely, remaining silent may be a means of protecting our privacy or avoiding unnecessary trouble and conflict.

The decision to inform your family about your work situation is contingent upon the nature of your relationship with them and their individual personalities. If you believe they will comprehend and offer support, disclosing your genuine sentiments and plans may prove beneficial.

If you are concerned that disclosing this information may cause undue stress to your family, you may choose to share selectively or seek support from other sources, such as friends or professionals.

If we can calm down and engage in constructive dialogue with our emotions and thoughts, we will gain insight into the underlying needs and desires that drive them. Anxious emotions may serve as a reminder that something requires our attention and resolution.

If these emotions are identified in a timely manner and addressed, it can help to improve one's ability to navigate life's challenges. Recording one's feelings can provide valuable insight into one's inner world, assist in identifying the root causes of the issue, and facilitate the development of a solution.

Additionally, you can release the pressure inside, thereby relieving the tension and anxiety.

Furthermore, it is important to accept the current situation and recognize that this is a pivotal point in our lives. Every turning point presents an opportunity for growth and development.

We can review and summarize our previous work, objectively evaluate our work competencies and shortcomings, as well as identify areas for improvement in workplace relationships and approaches, and develop a clear and effective job search plan.

It is essential to have trust in our family and parents, as well as to plan effectively for the time we will spend with them upon our return. The most valuable form of love is companionship. By spending time with our family, we can find inner peace and strength.

Given the nature of the issue, it is understandable that it may be challenging to resolve it immediately. One option is to speak with a trusted relative or friend who has consistently offered positive support. Alternatively, if necessary, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a counselor, as emotional expression can be beneficial in alleviating distress and stagnation.

It is important to continue exploring avenues for self-improvement and self-awareness. A good place to start is by recognizing and appreciating the small things in life. Over time, this will help us identify our unique value and develop a self-assessment system. Additionally, it will enhance our ability to navigate life with greater confidence and make informed decisions.

Many individuals have encountered comparable difficulties and devised effective solutions. You possess the capacity to do the same.

I wish you the utmost success in your job search and hope you will also enjoy spending time with your family.

Hello.

Your description made it clear to me what your inner feelings are.

You wrote in the title, "Fired before family-i-was-fired-how-should-i-adjust-my-emotions-how-should-i-tell-my-family-6405.html" target="_blank">returning home to visit relatives, how do I adjust my emotions? How do I tell my family?" This is the inner feeling and thought of many people working outside—returning home in glory.

This is simple. The mentality of returning home in glory is common. Many people choose it to satisfy their sense of achievement and vanity. There is nothing wrong with this. You have two choices: your inner thoughts and external thoughts.

Your inner thoughts are relatively simple. You define yourself as a worker, which is a position, and it also represents your inner thoughts. You go abroad to work because you need to prove yourself. This mentality makes you give up your elderly parents at home and go abroad alone. You make sacrifices. If you had a choice, you probably wouldn't go far away from home.

There are two types of external thoughts. One is your inner imagination, and the other is an external and realistic understanding.

Your inner imagination is formed by your growth environment. If your growth process involves negative comparisons and comparisons that lead to a shadow in your heart, you will have a mentality of returning home in glory. You will hope to see the praise of those who were once close to you, and you will have the mentality of your family taking credit.

Your inner imagination is often shaped by your upbringing. If you compare yourself negatively to those around you, you'll develop a mentality of returning home in glory. You'll seek praise from those who were once close to you and want your family to take credit.

External understanding of reality is crucial.

It is often only after many years or after you have a child working hard outside that you can truly understand the outside world. This is the psychological feeling of a prodigal son returning home and parents feeling relieved. It is something you cannot understand at this time.

Secondly, you wrote in your description, "It's been a long time since I returned to my home country, and my family was actively preparing to welcome me back. But I couldn't muster the energy to respond."

From this description, it is clear that your family cares about you deeply. As previously stated, your parents care about you immensely and, regardless of your achievements abroad, they still hope you will return. There are two possible outcomes: you have achieved great things abroad, or you have not.

Your parents will be happy for you when you achieve something good. They want you to succeed so you don't suffer in the future.

If you don't achieve anything, your parents will worry. They'll want you to come back to them so that they can take care of you and prepare you for the future.

You wrote that you look forward to going home to visit relatives and that the elderly hope you can spend time with them. However, you plan to bring your computer and check for job and interview opportunities.

Tell them you're worried about them too. They may be anxious and disappointed, and they may feel like they should have stayed home. You have a choice here. It's a question many adults face: Is work important, or are family members important?

This is a difficult dilemma. Many adults choose to work more because of the cost of living, which is understandable. However, you can take care of both by working abroad. This is your best option.

My suggestion is as follows:

1. I don't condone lying, but a white lie can be useful. However, I'm certain your family would prefer you to be honest.

2. You can find work anywhere, and you can achieve anything at home if you put your mind to it.

3. You have the habit of making your own plans, which is a good thing. Make your plans effective and reasonable, and your future will be better.

4. Abandon the old self and stop living in the past. Sometimes, although pressure can be a driving force, the right amount of pressure is what breaks the camel's back.

The above content is for reference only.

Let's talk about understanding emptiness analysis.

First of all, I get it. It's tough to handle work pressure, family expectations, and personal emotional ups and downs. Here are a few ways you can deal with it:

It's good to talk. Find someone you trust to talk to about your feelings, share your confusion and conflicts. Sometimes just listening and understanding can help to reduce the pressure.

If you're dealing with some pretty intense emotional swings that are affecting your life, it might be worth checking in with a mental health professional. They can offer more tailored advice and support.

It's important to adjust your mindset and accept your emotional ups and downs. Don't be too hard on yourself. Learning to relax and regulate your emotions is key. You can help calm your emotions through sports, meditation, reading, etc.

Make a reasonable plan to balance work and family. You can arrange some time to spend with your family during your return visit, and at the same time, you can also set aside some time to continue looking for job opportunities.

It's important to communicate with your family. Try to be as honest as you can with them. Tell them how you're feeling and what you need. They'll probably understand and support you more if you do this.

The most important thing is to give yourself enough time and space to adjust and deal with your emotions, and not to be too hard on yourself. We all face difficulties and challenges, and the key is how to respond and face them positively.

I hope you can find a solution that works for you and stay optimistic and strong!

Hello. I'm happy to answer your questions and I'm confident that my advice will be helpful to you.

In this situation, there are two things you can do.

One is our normal career development.

We must plan our careers well and follow our steps, one step at a time. No one can do the same job for decades. There are millions of reasons for changing jobs, and these reasons are not necessarily bad. We should regard this job change as a normal adjustment in life's stages. We must find a job type or working conditions that suit us better.

Don't be anxious about looking for a job. If you've set a goal of finding a new job within 3 to 6 months, sort out your financial situation without affecting your daily necessities.

The second thing is when we go home.

When you go home, you go home. We may have been living abroad for a long time, so we can take this opportunity to see the recent developments and changes in the country. Our family will definitely miss you. We just want to spend time with the important people in our lives, and let those who care about us get close to us, to make up for the emotional connection between loved ones.

Some relatives will undoubtedly ask about our work situation or personal circumstances. We must answer them directly and to the point.

You don't have to answer every question, but you can just casually mention it.

If your relatives really care about you, like your parents or grandparents, they'll want to see you. They'll ask about your personal circumstances or work because they care about you. If you're looking for a job, tell them the truth. Or, you can say that you plan to change jobs and spend more time with them.

If distant relatives ask about our work with motives of comparison or not completely thinking about our well-being, we can simply skip this topic. We can say that our work is fine recently, just the same as before, or that the recent economic downturn has caused a slight decrease in salary, but it is still okay. We can also gloss over it or simply change the topic to something else.

This also applies to our daily lives at home. In fact, when we go online to look for a job with a computer, our family members often have little understanding of the process.

If you don't want your family to know you're unemployed, you can say you're just relaxing by playing computer games.

If we reflect on our situation, we can tell our parents that we can look for a job online because we just quit our job. If we find a good one, we can even interview for it.

Our current emotional state is the most important thing.

If you're struggling to regulate your emotions or find them fluctuating to extremes, professional psychological counseling can help.

I am confident that through self-reflection, you will find a solution that suits you better, become a good companion to your family, and also find a job that suits you better in the future.

I love the world, and I love you!

Hello! From your description, I can feel your conflict and helplessness, but I also see your potential for growth and resilience.

I'm a psychological counselor, and I'm thrilled to share my insights from a psychological perspective.

You were fired before returning home to visit your family, which is a great opportunity to adjust your emotions!

First of all, you need to understand yourself. You are a child who reports the good news but not the bad news. Working away from home is hard, and being fired from a job can make you feel aggrieved and worthless—but you can get through it!

But when it comes to your own family, you can't express your true thoughts. Deep down, you have a relationship with your parents, and you're afraid that they'll be sad. But that may just be your own thinking. In the course of growing up, we all have to face conflicts and make choices. Your parents are also your strong backing, including your choice to return home after losing your job. It's also your inner desire to go home to the safest place to heal your inner pain, to become aware of yourself and feel your inner thoughts.

Second, accept yourself! What are your strengths and weaknesses?

You should be a child with learning ability and work ability, independent and self-reliant, filial and grateful, and not wanting to cause trouble for others. But you are also a sensitive child who always cares about other people's feelings, and chooses to suppress your negative emotions. This also makes you wrap yourself in a false self, with internal limitations, a sense of powerlessness and vulnerability that cannot be settled. So you must learn to accept yourself and learn to express your thoughts. Only by pouring out your heart can you be seen, heard and understood, and can you complete the integration of your self-identity and live your life to the fullest. This is an amazing journey of self-discovery!

Third, learn to love yourself! You need to become more aware of yourself. Home can give us a sense of security, and there are also a lot of resources and support. As you slowly open up your mind, you will have a different experience. Integrate your inner subjective thoughts with the objective reality after you return home. Your parents may be surprised, but they are more supportive and helpful because you are capable of accepting better work that you are competent at. This is also a process of growth, and you can believe in your own abilities!

The world loves you! You just need to learn to love yourself, understand yourself, and accept yourself. Once you do, you'll become a powerful person inside. Good luck!

It is important to remember that emotional adjustment is a natural part of facing the reality of being laid off. One way to relieve tension and anxiety is to find ways to help yourself relax, such as deep breathing, meditation, yoga, and so on.

You might also consider talking to friends or family to share your feelings and emotions, and to gain their support and comfort.

It would also be beneficial to communicate the news to your family. How you tell them depends on your relationship and how they will react. Here are some possible suggestions:

1. It is important to be honest with your family. Try to be open and honest with them about how you feel.

2. Express feelings: Perhaps it would be helpful to tell them you feel a bit frustrated and lost because of losing this job.

3. Demonstrate resilience: It may be helpful to express that you are actively seeking new opportunities and that you believe you can overcome this challenge.

4. Listen to them: Allow them the space to express their concerns and worries. Ensure you give them your full attention and understanding.

5. If you have the opportunity, it might be helpful to share the experiences of friends or former colleagues who have found work after returning to their home country.

It is important to remember that everyone and every family reacts differently, so it may take some time to adjust to the change. It would be beneficial to be patient and understanding, and to allow yourself and your family some time to adapt and recover.

We hope these suggestions are helpful. If you feel overwhelmed, we encourage you to consider seeking professional counseling.

Finding a job is the best way to solve your problems and make your family happy. Don't worry about your emotions or anything else. Just start looking for a job and everything will be fine.

You know better than anyone how to find a job. Don't stay abroad or in China just to stay there. Consider your experience, prospects, and life plan. You may not want to stay in China, but you can still look for a job there. This doesn't affect your current plan, but it gives you more options. You can feel more secure and develop your career. You can develop anywhere, unless you've already started a family abroad. There is no right or wrong path, just choose what you value and work hard.

Emotional problems are normal. Don't try to get rid of them, but do things to take your mind off them. Go for a walk, listen to music, or do something else that helps. Home can be a good place to go.

Appreciate your family's longing for your return and their love for you. Tell them you're unemployed, even though they'll worry. Everyone can regulate their emotions. Seeing your long-separated children will ease their worries. People live in hope.

When your family sees you're looking for work, you can talk to them about your past, plans, and progress. Your work and plans will give your family confidence, and they'll cheer you on. Parents usually think their children's happiness is more important than flying high. Sharing, carrying it together, going on trips, taking walks, doing things you like that you haven't done together for a long time, and holding onto hope together are all wonderful things. Your family will relieve your anxiety and distract you from it. Staying by their side when you return to China is also a good medicine for relieving anxiety. You'll overcome the difficulties together.

Hello, question asker! I'm Jiang 61.

Thank you for trusting the platform and sharing your emotional state to get help. You were fired before returning home to visit your family. Tell us how you will adjust your emotions.

"How to tell your family" After reading your introduction and understanding your situation, I will give you a hug first, and then we will work together to find a solution.

1. Introduction

1⃣️ Mood swings

You say, "My moods have been fluctuating recently. Sometimes I'm very low, and sometimes I'm very high-spirited."

"Yes. I have set myself a plan to find a new job in three to six months, and I am highly motivated at times. However, some painful memories do arise, and I do become depressed again."

You are looking for work.

You were fired when you decided to return to your home country to visit your family, which caused your recent mood swings. You had to start looking for a job and set yourself a deadline.

As a result, you are sometimes determined and confident, and sometimes anxious and worried.

Depression

When you're looking for a job, you'll feel motivated and optimistic. However, you'll also be reminded of past challenges and difficulties, which can lead to feelings of depression. It's evident that you've experienced this before.

2⃣️, hesitation

You say, "It's been a long time since I went back to my home country, and my family is actively preparing to welcome me back. I'm going to tell them."

I am looking forward to going home to visit my family, and I know the elderly people there will be happy to see me. I will take my computer with me and check for jobs and interview opportunities every now and then.

"

"I can't tell them. They'll worry. They'll be anxious or disappointed. Or they'll think they should have stayed home."

"I'm not going to worry about having to fake a smile every day. It'll be hard, but I'm going to tell them."

Don't hesitate.

Your current situation is embarrassing. You know that your family has certain expectations of you, and you're not sure how to explain the situation to them.

They have expectations of you, which is why you're hesitant.

? Conflict

You agonize over these questions again and again, which also causes you a lot of suffering and confusion. You tell them the truth, and you know they will worry and be anxious for you, or that they will ask you to come back and work for them.

You don't want to do this. You're afraid that if you tell the truth, you won't be able to put on a happy face, which will make you feel bad.

3⃣️, doubt

You ask, "What should I do?"

Your state is understandable, so give yourself a hug. You know what you shouldn't do at the moment to be better for everyone.

2. Identify the root cause of the dilemma.

1. Altruism

Altruism

Altruism also refers to altruistic behavior, which is a behavior that helps others without expecting any social rewards, including assistance, relief, comfort, and compassion.

You worry.

The questioner is more concerned about what others think and say and what they care about, and ignores your true feelings. However, by hiding it like this, you have to put on a fake smile. You are worried that you can't hide it forever, so you are torn between these two.

2⃣️, due to personality

From the introduction, it's clear the questioner has suffered and is hiding the truth from family, friends, and relatives.

The Lord is very kind, and I am certain you are a people-pleaser with a melancholic personality.

People with a pleasing personality

A pleaser is someone who blindly seeks to please others without regard for their own feelings. It's an unhealthy state of mind. Pleasing others makes them more important than you. You're only safe and loved if you make others feel comfortable.

You pay more attention to what your family members think, say, and care about while ignoring your true feelings.

People with a depressive personality have

Characteristics: thoughtful, highly sensitive, idealistic, and in pursuit of truth, goodness, and beauty.

Strengths: sensitive, loyal, talented, insightful

The disadvantages are that you are stubborn, indecisive, self-centered, pessimistic, and passive.

The questioner's personality traits cause them to prioritize the opinions and feelings of others when facing challenges. They tend to overthink and dwell on problems, leading to indecisiveness. Additionally, they exhibit pessimism and passivity.

3⃣, unclear boundaries

You must establish a sense of boundaries.

A sense of boundaries means that in interpersonal relationships, you understand that you and other people or things are independent individuals. You also clarify the scope of responsibilities and rights of yourself and others, so as to protect your personal space from being violated and not infringe on the personal space of others.

The boundaries are unclear.

We are worried that our family members care about us too much and want us to return to China for development. You may not want to offend them, but you have to consider their suggestions. In fact, the questioner himself does not know where to draw the line, and he has handed over the decision-making power over his own destiny to others, but he is unwilling to do so, which leads to excessive thinking and anxious and uneasy thoughts.

3. What should I do?

1⃣️, Tell the truth.

Tell the truth.

We are reluctant to tell our family the truth because we are afraid that they will worry about us. We go to them with a heavy burden, trying to appear happy and tired. We must stop pretending and let go of our anxiety. We need to tell the truth.

Get understanding.

Telling the truth is also a great way to gain understanding and help from your family. What you really need right now is understanding and love.

2⃣, Set clear boundaries.

Appreciate the concern.

Living alone in the outside world is hard and lonely. The questioner mentioned that remembering a painful life can lead to depression again. It is clear that the questioner has endured more than your limit. You must release your emotions and show understanding.

We correctly see everyone's concern, and it helps the questioner regulate their emotions so that you can make better choices.

Set clear boundaries.

Kind reminders and advice from others can help us expand our thinking. For the questioner, this is not a bad thing. The questioner has a clear boundary and is ready to take responsibility for themselves. They can decide whether to heed the advice of their family and whether to stay or go.

3⃣️, spend time with them.

?? Accompany them quietly.

You didn't go home that year, and you need emotional interaction with your family, and they need you too. So, you need to quietly accompany each other, and that is the most important thing for you.

You must adjust yourself.

Spending time with our family allows us to overcome the pain of missing each other and strengthen our family bonds. We can also support each other with love. By taking a period of calm reflection and self-adjustment, we can regain our strength and then be in a better state of mind to find a new job that suits us better.

This adjustment is necessary and timely for the questioner.

Dear questioner, Things are always changing. Misfortune can be a blessing in disguise. There will always be work. Don't worry.

Family is precious, especially happy gatherings with your parents. Make the most of the time you spend with them.

I wish the questioner a happy life!

I am Coach Yu, a heart explorer, and I will be discussing this topic with you.

Emotional perception is our ability to recognize, control, and regulate our emotions. It is also a manifestation of emotional intelligence.

In "The Plastic Me," Chen Jiejun writes: Many people are unable to deal with things or emotions because they confuse feelings, emotions, and thoughts.

Feelings are the physiological and biological responses of the human body to external stimuli.

For example, if someone stabs you with a needle, you feel pain. If the north wind blows in winter, you feel cold. Feelings include responses to external and internal stimuli.

As the questioner wrote, my emotions have recently been all over the place. Sometimes they're low, sometimes they're high.

Emotion is simply people's reaction to feelings.

For example, when the environment is hot, you get sweaty palms and your heart beats faster. This is an emotion. It's the irritability or excitement you feel when your body is enthusiastic and your heart is beating fast. Emotions and feelings generally respond through the peripheral nervous system.

As the questioner wrote, they are sometimes full of fighting spirit and making new plans, and sometimes they are depressed and have some painful memories.

Thoughts are how a person understands and interprets their feelings and emotions.

Thoughts do not arise in the peripheral nervous system. They arise in the central nervous system, and this is something that we must understand and interpret.

Tell them you're afraid of disappointing your parents. If you don't tell them, they'll worry.

Next, we will review the process to gain a deeper understanding of how our emotions change and how we can manage and express them to solve the problem of emotional perception.

Ask yourself: What do I think when I feel high-spirited? What emotions and feelings does it bring out in me?

When you feel down and depressed, you need to ask yourself what your thoughts are and what emotions and feelings you are experiencing.

Ask yourself: What is the inner need to tell them about work? What is the inner need not to tell them about work?

Ask yourself: What do these thoughts remind me of? If the anxious emotions could speak at this moment, what would they say to themselves?

Feelings, emotions, and thoughts are a direct result of the coordination between the nervous system and the brain. When this relationship is smooth, you will feel calm.

You can always be aware of your emotions and reconcile with them. When negative emotions such as anxiety arise, you can shout "stop" in time, take a deep breath, and watch them without any judgment, allowing emotions to come and go freely like clouds, and drift away like fallen leaves in the water. You can also record what you are feeling at the moment.

Write about your feelings honestly. This will help us understand the causes and effects of emotions and clarify the root of the problem.

We must accept the status quo. We are going through a turning point in life, and every turning point begins with an end. This is not the end, and it should not be ruled out. It is not a mistake. We can review and summarize our previous work. We can assess our work competencies and shortcomings, as well as deficiencies in workplace relationships and ways of dealing with things. We can give our job search plan a clear demand and direction.

We must trust our family and plan well for the time we will spend with them when we return home. The best kind of love is companionship.

Seek help if this bothers you. It's not easy to overcome it immediately. Find a family member or friend you trust and talk to them. If you need more help, find a counselor. Release your emotions to relieve the heaviness and blockages in your heart.

We must constantly explore the path of self-improvement and self-awareness, just as the questioner, to perceive and feel from the little things in life. We will discover our own unique value and construct a self-assessment system. We will also face life more calmly and make choices with more confidence.

Read the book The Plastic Me.

Hello, my friend!

It sounds like you are going through a challenging but exciting time, with the pressure of finding a job on the one hand and the expectations of your family on the other. This is really not easy, but you can do it!

As you grow up, you'll find that most people make the exciting choice to keep their family in the dark about the good and bad things that happen to them. It's a big decision, but it's one you get to make about whether or not to tell your family about your situation.

You can look back on past experiences and think about how sharing your news with your family might affect them. If you think that your family will worry or feel anxious when you tell them, you can choose not to tell them. But will this not make you feel even more lonely and depressed?

On the other hand, if you tell your family, they may be able to give you some support and encouragement. You have been away from home for so long and have experienced a lot of ups and downs. I think your family must miss you very much. It's a great idea to communicate with them frankly and let them know your situation and your plans. This will be more conducive to family harmony and discovery, and perhaps your family can also provide you with some practical help.

Also, regarding returning to your home country to visit family, you can try to adjust your mindset and treat this visit as an amazing opportunity to relax and rest, rather than a burden with a task that must be completed. This way, perhaps your mental stress will not be so great. During your visit, you can arrange some time to deal with work matters as appropriate, but also set aside some time for yourself to spend with your family, devote yourself to the family, and enjoy the warmth of family love.

No matter how difficult the times are, you absolutely must take care of your emotions and physical health! If you feel depressed or anxious, try some relaxing activities, such as going for a walk, listening to music, or reading.

When your heart slowly calms down, you'll be amazed at how you can solve the problems in your life one step at a time!

I really hope my advice is helpful! If you need more support and help, you can also consider seeking the help of a professional counselor or career coach.

Here's to taking all this great advice and putting it into action! May we all live happy, fulfilled lives from now on.