I feel like I've messed everything up and hurt so many people. What should I do?

Good day. I extend my support and understanding with a warm gesture from a distance.

From your description, it is evident that you are experiencing significant self-blame and guilt, as well as a profound sense of guilt towards others for your actions.

The self-blame, guilt, and guilt you feel towards him are merely feelings and do not reflect how others have truly treated you. What is your opinion on this matter?

The underlying cause of these feelings is an internal inferiority complex, lack of confidence, and an inability to accept oneself. When an individual has an excess of self-acceptance and a strong dislike of themselves due to feelings of inferiority, they may unintentionally project these internal self-rejecting feelings onto others, assuming that others will not accept them either.

Allow and accept these painful emotional feelings you are currently experiencing, and then try to stay with them to identify the underlying needs that are driving your feelings of guilt and self-blame. For example, you may be afraid of being rejected or disliked, or you may crave acceptance, recognition, affirmation, and a sense of belonging.

When you can identify the underlying needs driving your emotional state, you will be better equipped to accept and understand your current emotions.

At this juncture, you will be more confident that your self-perception is not shaped by external factors, but rather by your own internal beliefs and behaviors. When you can try to fully accept yourself from the inside out,

Even in instances where you have caused harm to yourself or others, you will not be unduly self-critical. Instead, you will be able to identify the underlying needs and motives that drove your actions. This will enable you to apologise to those affected with courage and without regret. Furthermore, you will emerge from this experience with enhanced personal growth.

This is Q&A Pavilion Little Ear Lily World, and I extend my sincerest regards to you.

Greetings,

I empathize with your situation, as you have been harshly self-critical for experiencing feelings of guilt towards others. I offer my support in the form of a comforting embrace.

The assertion that "all problems really come from me" is a fallacious one. Psychological theory posits that the dynamics of relationships are shaped by mutual influence, with each party bearing equal responsibility for their actions. In a team context, this implies that each member is accountable for their contributions. To illustrate, if an individual fails to complete a task, it is the leader's responsibility to provide guidance and ascertain the reason behind this failure. Therefore, it is implausible to attribute the capacity for assuming responsibility for another's work to this individual.

"Hurting a great many people." Was this feedback provided by these individuals in an honest manner? Or is this an assumption on your part?

It is important to understand that one's own feelings are not necessarily indicative of the feelings of others. Learning to distinguish between issues is a crucial skill.

The concept of "separation of issues" entails the ability to differentiate between the concerns of others and one's own, as well as between the emotions of others and one's own. To illustrate, if another individual expresses themselves forcefully in a manner that evokes discomfort and elicits anger from you, it is essential to recognize that their emotional state is independent of yours. Prioritizing self-care and emotional regulation is crucial.

The aforementioned evidence indicates that you are also a highly sensitive individual. I suggest two books for your consideration: "Embracing My Sensitive Emotions" and "Self-Care." The fragility of the heart begins with self-care, self-acceptance, and the embrace of sensitive emotions, which, in turn, facilitate the gradual strengthening of the heart.

The world and I extend our love to you.

Wen Jun