It's annoying, I really want to disappear, so I shouldn't pay any attention to my family?

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to express my appreciation for the opportunity to engage with you in this forum. It is a unique experience, akin to meeting someone in person when you read their words. I look forward to our continued dialogue. Kind regards,

After carefully reviewing your description, I understand your frustration. You had already found it challenging to manage your response to your family's attempts to persuade you, despite recognizing that they might not fully comprehend your circumstances. You were initially reluctant to engage with your family's "chicken soup," but now that you have, you have gained valuable insights and taken the crucial step of seeking assistance on the platform. This has significantly motivated you to pursue personal growth.

Let us take a moment to discuss the circumstances you have outlined.

You indicate that you are experiencing significant irritation and an increasing difficulty in controlling the urge to die. Additionally, you state that you considered trying harder that morning but ultimately decided against it, citing the need to prioritize your family's input. After reviewing this information, I have the following questions:

1. Could you please clarify when you first felt irritated?

2. What factors influenced your decision to engage with the input from your family members?

3. If you were to ignore them, what adjustments would you make to your approach?

4. Could you please elaborate on the expectations that underpin this thought?

5. Would your level of distress be reduced if your family members were to refrain from offering unsolicited advice?

The aforementioned five points are intended to demonstrate your exemplary self-awareness. It is evident that you are not inclined to heed your family's advice and instead wish to make your own decisions regarding your affairs. However, your family members appear to have chosen to intervene with what they perceive as the "right" opinion, without fully considering your "real needs," which has led to your resentment and anger. Consequently, your actions are merely a means of defending your own boundaries.

You have demonstrated courage in expressing your emotions, but they have been met with a lack of understanding, as you have observed.

How might one regulate and restore one's emotions? In psychology, there is a concept called "issue separation."

Applying this concept to the state you mentioned in your description, it can be a way of thinking that adjusts your awareness. The onus is on your family to understand your situation; your freedom to choose your lifestyle is not contingent on their approval.

I understand that you may have chosen to listen to the advice from your family because you value their input. However, I believe it would be more beneficial to consider a different perspective: each individual is the master of their own life, and therefore the only person who can decide what kind of person they want to be.

In conclusion, I hope this response and the information I have shared will provide you with the inspiration you need to overcome the feelings of irritability and depletion.

The diversity of life lies in the fact that it has more than one side. I believe you also have a side that you want to live out. As for what that side looks like, I will leave it to you to determine in the future through your own efforts.

Please take care of yourself. I hope you are well and look forward to seeing you again in the future.

Greetings, question asker. My name is Jiang 61.

Firstly, I would like to express my gratitude for placing your trust in us and disclosing your personal difficulties, which enables us to assist you in identifying a solution. You have inquired as to whether it is accurate to conclude that if one is experiencing such a high level of annoyance that they wish to cease existing, they should refrain from engaging with their family.

"After reading your brief introduction, I fully comprehend your current emotional state. I offer you a hug to provide you with physical warmth, and then engage in a discussion regarding potential courses of action.

1. Introduction

1. Irritable

You stated, "It is bothersome, and it is becoming increasingly challenging to manage the impulse to end one's life. It is evident that I considered attempting a more vigorous approach earlier today, but ultimately, I concluded that it was unwise to devote any attention to my family."

The source of your irritation can be traced back to interactions with your family. It is evident that you are already burdened by numerous concerns, which contribute to your sense of unease. The incessant nagging and preaching from your family only serve to exacerbate your annoyance, prompting you to seek respite from this environment.

2⃣️, Don't understand

You state, "I am aware that my family members are unable to comprehend my circumstances, and I recognize that they possess limited knowledge about me. As I listen to their discourse on the subject of chicken soup, I experience a growing sense of despondency. I am compelled to acknowledge that I harbor a profound desire for self-termination."

One may choose to be alone.

It is possible that you are experiencing depressive symptoms, which may manifest as a tendency to become easily irritated. You appear to desire solitude in which you can engage in self-reflection.

A lack of comprehension

Your family members lack comprehension of your present circumstances, evince no inclination to gain such understanding, and persist in proffering the same counsel you find unpalatable, thereby intensifying your distress. You entertain suicidal thoughts.

3⃣, doubts

The subject inquires as to the means of regulating and restoring their emotions, as well as the underlying causes of the increasing difficulty in doing so.

Furthermore, you are reluctant to continue residing in this environment and express a desire to achieve a state of calm. You inquire about the specific emotional state that is becoming increasingly challenging to regulate.

2. Causes of Irritability

1. Repressed Emotions

Depression

The process of suppression is a psychological phenomenon that can be consciously perceived and that causes discomfort to conscious feelings. It is a method used by individuals to exert control over certain desires and cravings.

These desires are not applied to things that have serious conflicts of consciousness; however, they remain significant. For example, repression is when an individual is tempted to argue or confront another person, yet is afraid of hurting their feelings and must control their emotions to make the other person feel better.

The term "suppressed emotions" is used to describe the phenomenon of individuals experiencing negative emotions but choosing to refrain from expressing them.

From the aforementioned introduction, it is evident that the questioner is experiencing a sense of annoyance. However, as previously stated, the questioner is aware that their parents do not fully comprehend their true needs and thoughts. Despite feeling anger, the questioner is concerned about upsetting their parents, leading to the suppression of their annoyance and the concealment of their negative emotions.

Such repressed and uncomfortable emotions will not disappear automatically; rather, they can only be temporarily suppressed in the subconscious. Upon encountering a similar situation, they will manifest and evoke a negative emotional response.

2. Family environment influences

The term "family environment" is used to describe the combination of all external factors in the family that have an impact on the individual. These factors can be divided into four categories: the soft environment, the hard environment, the internal environment, and the external environment. The soft environment includes family structure, parenting style, atmosphere, and living environment. It also encompasses the internal emotions and feelings of the individual. The hard environment includes financial strength, parents' education level, literacy, and other factors.

The term "family environment" encompasses the collective external factors within the family unit that exert influence over the individual. These factors can be broadly classified into four categories: the soft environment, which includes aspects such as family structure, parenting style, and the living environment; the hard environment, which encompasses financial strength, parental education level, and literacy; the internal environment, which pertains to the dynamics and relationships within the family; and the external environment, which includes the geographical location and neighborhood relationships. Collectively, these four environments exert a significant impact on an individual's well-being and development.

Influence

From the questioner's introduction, it appears that the primary source of the questioner's emotional state is the internal environment of the family. The questioner has been raised by parents who espouse moral principles and, as a result, the questioner's actual needs and thoughts are not fully understood.

The family environment exerts a considerable influence. Due to the question asker's inability to resist, he suppresses his emotions. Over time, the lack of an outlet for emotional expression results in restlessness and agitation.

3. Due to personality

From the questioner's introduction, it can be surmised that the questioner may exhibit characteristics of a pleasing type of melancholic personality. This would suggest that when they have an idea or emotion, they suppress it to avoid direct conflict with their parents.

Individuals with a pleasing personality

A pleasing personality is one that is driven to please others without regard for one's own feelings. This state of mind is considered unhealthy. The essence of pleasing others is that they are of greater importance than oneself. One's sense of safety and love is contingent upon making others feel comfortable.

As a result, greater attention is paid to the opinions and concerns of one's parents, even in the face of personal distress. In such instances, the individual may resort to self-restraint and the suppression of their own emotions, while also neglecting to acknowledge their genuine feelings.

Individuals with a melancholic personality

Individuals with a melancholic personality tend to exhibit the following characteristics:

Individuals with a melancholic personality tend to be thoughtful, highly sensitive, idealistic, and in pursuit of truth, goodness, and beauty.

The strengths of this personality type include delicacy, perceptivity, loyalty, reliability, talent, and insight.

The disadvantages of this personality type include obsessive tendencies, indecisiveness, self-centeredness, pessimism, and passivity.

The questioner's cautious, careful, perfectionistic, indecisive, pessimistic, and passive personality traits contribute to their reluctance to express their emotions and difficulty in extricating themselves from challenging situations.

3. Recommendations for Action

1. Professional counseling

Psychological counseling

Psychological counseling is defined as the process of utilizing psychological techniques to provide psychological assistance to individuals experiencing difficulties with psychological adaptation and seeking solutions to their problems.

Professional counseling is an effective approach to address the issue at hand.

The questioner presented himself as an individual experiencing heightened irritability, a lack of control over his emotions, and a suicidal urge. He also reported a perceived worsening of his irritability and difficulty in adapting to these changes.

In order to facilitate a swift and effective change in the emotional state of the questioner, it is imperative to pursue professional psychological counseling. By leveraging the counselor's expertise, we can assist the questioner in identifying the underlying causes of psychological distress, enabling a swift return to a state of emotional stability and overall well-being.

Secondly, it is important to understand the source of emotions.

A Brief Introduction to Emotions

The ABC theory of emotions was developed by American psychologist Albert Ellis. It posits that an event, designated as A, serves as an indirect cause of emotional and behavioral consequences, designated as C. However, the direct cause of C is the individual's perception and evaluation of the event A, which produces a belief, designated as B. In other words, a person's negative emotions and behavioral obstacles result from C, not from a direct trigger of A. Rather, they result from the incorrect perception and evaluation of A by the individual experiencing it, which produces a mistaken belief (B) that directly causes C.

The release of emotions is a crucial aspect of emotional management.

Once an individual becomes aware that they are experiencing a negative emotional state, it is not the situation itself that is the primary source of distress, but rather the beliefs that they hold about the situation. To illustrate, if a parent repeats a phrase such as "chicken soup for the soul," it is not the direct words themselves that evoke a negative emotional response, but rather the interpretation of those words (B) that leads to feelings of annoyance (C).

Therefore, this B is the reason we need to resolve, and it is the emotion we need to release at an appropriate juncture.

3⃣️, Emotion Management The ability to regulate one's emotions is a crucial skill in navigating interpersonal relationships. It entails recognizing the presence of an emotion and accepting it as a natural aspect of human experience. This allows individuals to respond to their emotions in a constructive manner, rather than allowing them to take control and influence one's actions and interactions in an unproductive manner.

The ability to manage one's emotions is a crucial skill for navigating family relationships, intimate partnerships, and interpersonal dynamics. Emotion management can be defined as:

The initial step in emotional management is to recognize the emotions one is experiencing.

This constitutes the initial phase of emotional management. When an emotional state is experienced, it is essential to identify the specific emotion involved, such as anxiety, anger, or sadness.

The initial step is to accept the emotion.

A healthy emotional state is one that is aligned with the circumstances at hand. When one's emotional response is in alignment with objective reality, the initial step is to acknowledge that these feelings are normal. This is known as emotional acceptance.

In this manner, emotional strain will diminish, and inner tranquility will manifest naturally.

The act of expressing one's emotions is a crucial aspect of emotional regulation.

Emotional expression is the articulation of one's own emotions, with the subject often employing the pronoun "I" and phrases such as "I feel," "My feelings are," and so forth.

The cultivation of emotions

Furthermore, the management of emotions necessitates cultivation and practice, which can be achieved through the following methods:

1) A regular lifestyle has also been shown to have a stabilizing effect on emotional states.

2) Cultivate a hobby that will maintain positive emotional states, foster self-love, and encourage appreciation for the beauty of life.

3) Practice care and assistance toward others, allowing love to reside within your heart. Assisting others is the most profound joy; facilitating self-sufficiency is also a worthwhile endeavor.

4) Immersion in nature, absorption of the essence of heaven and earth, and the opening of the heart will result in the soothing and stabilization of emotions.

5) Forming relationships with individuals who demonstrate emotional stability can help to mitigate the influence of emotional fluctuations.

The primary cause of the increasing frequency and difficulty in regulating irritability is the accumulation of unresolved emotions. To address this issue promptly, it is essential to seek professional guidance, identify the root causes of these emotions, and employ effective emotion management techniques to detect, accept, and express emotions in a constructive manner. Additionally, it is crucial to cultivate a mindful approach to emotions in daily life to facilitate their timely resolution.

It is recommended that the questioner maintain a healthy attitude, as it is believed that their negative emotions will become less frequent and intense over time.

Ultimately, it is my sincere hope that the individual in question will lead a fulfilling and joyous existence.

Good day. My name is Coach Yu, and I would like to engage in a discussion on this topic with you.

First, it is important to understand the nature of emotions. Emotions are composed of three key elements: subjective experiences, external manifestations, and physiological arousal. Each emotion may be an unmet internal demand. For example, when we miss the opportunity for a promotion or pay rise, we feel sad; when we lose a treasure we have treasured for many years, we feel angry.

In examining the subject of emotions, there is a tendency to focus on those that are more readily identifiable and outwardly expressed, such as anger, pain, and self-harm. However, there is a dearth of attention directed towards the less conspicuous and more deeply buried emotions, including guilt, self-blame, and shame.

As a result of their deep-seated nature, these emotions often evade verbal expression, rendering them difficult to convey to others and elicit their comprehension.

As the original poster stated, I am experiencing a high level of irritability, and it is becoming increasingly challenging to regulate my emotions and restore equilibrium. How might I effectively regulate and restore my emotions?

One might inquire as to the nature of the thoughts that arise when one's family members offer words of encouragement. What emotions and feelings does this evoke?

Additionally, one might inquire as to which emotional need is being fulfilled when the thought of disappearing arises. If this bothersome sensation could communicate its thoughts at this moment, what would it say?

Our emotions are repressed in the subconscious, and the cells of the body retain a memory of the experience. When a similar situation arises, this bodily memory is triggered, resulting in increased bodily tension and accelerated breathing.

This phenomenon is referred to as a "complex" in psychological literature, or an "emotional button."

Let us attempt to recall a previous instance in which we experienced this emotion in our interactions with our family. What circumstances surrounded that occurrence?

What precipitated this negative emotional state? What factors contribute to the emergence of such thoughts?

However, awareness represents the initial stage of change, thus allowing us to attempt to reconcile with our emotions. In the event of such irritating emotions arising, we can promptly issue a directive to "stop," take a deep breath, and quietly observe them without any judgment. We can also attempt writing therapy, which involves writing and drawing out our pain and suffering, thus providing an outlet for emotions and facilitating their release.

Additionally, the use of an empty chair can facilitate the creation of a secure environment through role-playing and self-dialogue. This approach enables the connection of past experiences with the present state of mind, as well as the conscious integration of chaotic thoughts, thereby allowing for the release of negative emotions.

Additionally, it may be beneficial to consider what one's ideal self and ideal family relationship might entail. What steps might be taken to align with this vision of the ideal self?

Once an individual has identified their own desires, they are able to differentiate between their own wants and the wants of others.

Once an individual has identified their desires, they will be better equipped to discern what they must decline. Such discernment and refusal will facilitate the emergence of one's authentic self, as postulated by Winnicott.

It is therefore essential to gain an understanding of ourselves and to confront our true selves.

It is important to note that assistance is available should one require it. If the issue is causing distress, it may be challenging to overcome it immediately. It is recommended to identify a family member or friend who can provide positive support and a safe space for discussion. If necessary, professional counseling may be sought to help manage emotions and overcome obstacles.

Let us discuss the concept of self-love. The individual in question was able to recognize her emotions in a timely manner and seek assistance on an online platform, which is an effective approach. Therefore, it is essential to prioritize self-care, including physical and emotional well-being.

Regardless of one's level of exhaustion and stress associated with academic and professional obligations, it is imperative to prioritize relaxation. While parents and family members may not fully comprehend this necessity, they nevertheless hope for my well-being. Moreover, we have all been allotted a finite amount of time and resources, and we can all experience the wonders of life and enjoy the prosperity of the world.

It is recommended that one take a deep breath, calm the mind, venture into nature, listen to the croaking of frogs, smell the singing of birds, and observe the blooming of flowers. This will allow one to connect with one's authentic self and experience the reality of life. In accordance with the principle of separating issues, it is important to recognize that the opinions of others are not a concern and that one's response is a personal choice.

When we gain clarity regarding the real world, resolve internal conflicts, accept experiences that did not align with our expectations, and develop an understanding of ourselves, we have undergone maturation and growth. I wish you the best of luck in this endeavor.

It is this author's recommendation that the reader view the motion picture entitled Forrest Gump.