26 years old, first-tier city, always anxious about the future, especially the internal conflict at work

Hello, question asker. My name is Evan.

I would like to extend my support to the questioner in the form of a hug, hoping that it will provide some strength. From the description provided by the questioner, it seems that they lack confidence in the future. The challenging situation they are currently facing has led to feelings of nervousness, anxiety, discomfort, pain, and overwhelm.

The questioner is troubled by a number of concerns, including worries about future plans, work-related anxieties, interpersonal relationship issues, and the challenge of adapting to new work environments. These concerns have the potential to generate a range of negative emotions.

It seems to me that the questioner is perhaps more concerned with not having a correct understanding of themselves and not having a good plan for their future. They are just thinking about pursuing their inner feelings and may feel overwhelmed when things go wrong at work. It would be interesting to know how the questioner's family members view the questioner's current situation.

I wonder if they offered any advice to the questioner.

From the narrative, it seems that the questioner is seeking a sense of value and stability. However, the pursuit of these values has not led to positive feelings, but rather the emergence of negative emotions. These emotions are hindering the questioner's ability to navigate the current situation. It would be beneficial to learn how to identify and overcome these negative emotions and cultivate a more positive mindset.

I believe that whatever challenges the questioner may face in the future, they will be better equipped to face them with the courage that comes from having faced similar difficulties in the past.

As the question was asked on a platform, we are unfortunately unable to communicate in detail about it. However, I can offer the questioner some advice on how to deal with the negative emotions that arise:

It might be helpful to try to identify the root cause of your anxiety.

Could I ask what might be causing the questioner some anxiety? Is it perhaps worries about work, or the disapproval of others, or a sense of confusion about one's whole life?

It would be beneficial for the questioner to take the time to carefully search for and perceive what may be affecting their anxiety, and to record it on paper.

It would be helpful to identify the negative emotions that cause the questioner anxiety and to understand the underlying cause of this anxiety. For instance, the questioner may feel that their current job is unsatisfactory and that they are worried about being unable to find a more satisfactory position.

The questioner said that he only considers his own future. Could I ask why that is? Who gave him this idea? Did he or did his family instill this idea in him?

Given your high expectations of yourself at work, it's understandable that you're reluctant to slack off or even to find a girlfriend. It seems that you're still afraid that you won't be able to balance work and relationships. This exclusive focus on work hasn't brought you the sense of stability and security you're looking for. Instead, it's caused you to experience serious anxiety.

Could it be that the questioner is driven by a desire to achieve higher goals, is apprehensive about the prospect of failure, is concerned about their ability to adapt, and finds it challenging to consider other possibilities while focusing on the future? By identifying the underlying cause of their anxiety, the questioner can develop a strategy to address their concerns more effectively.

It might be helpful to focus on what you want to solve the most.

It can be challenging to adapt to a new job, feel undervalued, or lack a clear plan for the future. Taking the time to write down your thoughts can help identify the issues you're facing.

Then, if you feel so inclined, you might consider ranking the importance of the things according to your feelings and identifying which problem you would like to focus on at this time.

Once you have identified the most pressing issue, it is worth considering whether you have the necessary resources to address it independently. If not, it may be helpful to seek the support of others or explore local resources that could assist in finding a solution.

You might consider discussing the matter with your family to see if there is any way to help the person in question solve the problem. When facing anxiety, it may be helpful to avoid dwelling on it or talking about it too much. Instead, try to focus on something positive. With time, you may find that you become more accustomed to it and your state of mind shifts.

It might be helpful to remember that there are often more solutions than problems.

Please take a moment to list the worst possible outcomes.

It might be helpful to consider the worst possible outcome of the situation, as well as any outcomes that the questioner may find difficult to accept. Making a list of these possibilities can help us identify potential coping strategies and areas where we may need to seek further support.

Rather than dwelling on potential negative outcomes, it might be helpful to consider the worst-case scenario and develop a plan to address it. For instance, if you were to pursue a desirable job opportunity, how would you handle it? Having a strategy in place could help you respond effectively when the time comes. Additionally, would this approach reduce the anxiety of the individual seeking guidance?

It would be beneficial to remember that there are often more solutions than difficulties. A gentleman strives for self-improvement. If you want a good result, you can only get it by constantly facing the real you and pursuing the better you.

It would be beneficial to pay attention to your own verbal habits.

It is not uncommon for us to have certain verbal habits when we encounter a situation that is less than ideal. For instance, we might say, "I'm so annoyed," or "I messed up again today." These negative words often reflect an exaggerated and emotional response to things, which can inadvertently deepen negative thoughts.

It would be beneficial for the poster to avoid using these types of words. To help you turn negative emotions into a positive, you could consider replacing these negative words with positive thoughts and praise. For example, "awful" could be replaced with "unfortunate" or "there is room for improvement," and "disaster" could be replaced with "challenge" or "inconvenience."

It may be helpful to look for the positive.

It is important to remember that nobody is perfect, and no matter how capable a person is, they will make mistakes. It is therefore important not to be too demanding of oneself at work and to allow for some flexibility. When you notice that you are dwelling on negative emotions, it can be helpful to stop and think of something positive instead.

It is important to remember that your responsibilities at your current job should not be neglected simply because you are planning a change in your career. It is always advisable to do your best at work, even if there is little time left to do so. I am confident that the questioner will find success in their new role.

For instance, losing a game can be a challenging experience. However, the process of identifying the root cause can provide an opportunity to learn new strategies to avoid similar mistakes in the future.

It might be helpful to seek outside assistance.

If you feel that the above approach may not be the most effective for you, you might consider seeking the guidance of a professional psychologist or counselor for psychological intervention. It can be beneficial to discuss your negative emotions with these professionals. You can talk about them openly and honestly, knowing that these interventions are confidential.

It might be helpful to explain clearly how these anxiety attacks make you feel, describe how they generally start, and how you respond. If necessary, it could be beneficial to maintain ongoing communication with these professionals until these anxiety attacks no longer affect you.

I hope my answer is helpful to the questioner.

Everyone is a beacon! Whether you're asking questions or answering them, your words can illuminate the hearts of more people. This is the energy that belongs to us all!

Hello, I am Fei Yun, a heart exploration coach. I can feel that you have so much potential and that you are ready to take on the world!

You're ready for a change! You're looking for a new challenge and want to make a move. But after much thought and consideration, you're feeling a bit hesitant and have some self-doubt. You're worried that if you change jobs, you won't be able to adapt and survive in the long run. But remember, "Tugging on one hair will move the whole body." Your dissatisfaction at work has led to some challenges in your interpersonal relationships, emotional problems, and work status. But you can overcome these hurdles and emerge stronger and more confident than ever!

There are always more than three solutions to every problem! Let's dive in and take a look at this together.

First, you get to figure out why you want to change jobs!

At 26, you should have been in society for a while, but you are experiencing burnout. What is the reason for wanting to change jobs? Are you unable to adapt to your work, are there tense relationships, or have you hit a development bottleneck? These are all great reasons to make a change!

You're not jumping ship blindly. You've got this! As you said, "I feel that I need a lot of improvement, I'm worried that I won't be able to do the job, and I'm even worried that I'll be fired during the probation period." All of this shows that you have a relatively clear understanding of yourself.

It is so good to have a goal and to bravely step out of your comfort zone! This is a sure sign that you are pursuing progress and being proactive. But remember, stepping out of your comfort zone also requires strength and capital. So, it's important to distinguish whether the present is your comfort zone.

Let me tell you an old story. It goes like this: Employee A complains to B, "I've had enough of the leadership, I've had enough of this company, I'm leaving!" But B persuades A, "Why not use this company to give yourself more opportunities to hone your skills? When you're strong enough, you can take the company's resources with you!"

B listened to reason and worked even harder, and guess what? A pay rise and promotion were only natural! B asked A: Are you still going to jump ship?

A smiled and said, "It wasn't that other people were sorry for me or that the company was unfair to me. It was simply that my own abilities were limited at the time, which gave me the opportunity to grow and learn!"

"I am the root of everything." When we change ourselves, we will find that the scenery around us has also changed. If you want to ignite the firewood around you, you must first become a ball of fire yourself. And you can do it!

2. Take the exciting step to improve your emotional value!

The great news is that you can boost your emotional intelligence to influence the emotions of others. The higher your emotional intelligence, the happier you will be!

Your low energy and low mood also affect your relationships with family, colleagues, and potential partners. But don't worry! You can easily turn this around.

It's not easy for young people to work hard in first-tier cities, but it's also not impossible! Watching dramas such as "Ode to Joy", "Settling Down" and "Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou: We Don't Believe in Tears" can help you understand the pressure and anxiety that young people face in these cities.

It's so important to learn to motivate yourself and maintain a positive, sunny, and optimistic attitude! Both good times and bad times are life experiences. If you regard them as difficulties, they will indeed become obstacles. But if you regard them as resources, they can become your stepping stones!

For example, in the story above, A turned the criticism and accusations of others into motivation. You can do the same! Take responsibility for yourself, find out why the new leader doesn't value you, and improve your performance.

The boss is focused on the business performance of his company. So, if you help to improve the performance, you will naturally be given more responsibilities!

Your happiness depends on your internal motivation. Look inside yourself and you'll find the strength to cope with anything! Look outside yourself and you'll always be left wanting. Look inside yourself and you can enhance your sense of self-worth, constantly affirm yourself, understand and accept yourself, and nourish yourself through learning, thereby maturing and growing.

When you can't hold on any longer, it's time to admit defeat and go for a run! Get some exercise, let yourself go in the midst of the activity, find the freedom of solitude and silence, and let your original wisdom sparkle once again!

I really hope the above is helpful to you! And I just want to say that I love you, and I love the world too! ??

If you want to continue the conversation, just click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom. I can't wait to communicate and grow with you one-on-one!

Greetings.

It is acceptable to proceed at a pace that is comfortable for you.

For many, work represents a primary source of income and a means of achieving career goals. It is also a source of personal fulfillment and a sense of security. Consequently, an understanding of the importance of work can contribute to financial and personal independence.

(1) The necessity to work and maintain self-awareness varies from individual to individual. Different people have different perceptions of a job due to their varying starting points. This can also be described as the disparate outcomes resulting from differences in attitudes towards work. Consequently, those who have a stronger attachment to their work can often demonstrate greater self-efficacy, as if they are warriors on "caffeine." The more they persevere, the more courageous they become. This is because they have a profound sense of connection with their work, and at the same time, their relationship with themselves is harmonious. Therefore, they can receive more positive feedback from their work, which continuously replenishes their depleted energy.

It is evident that our attitude towards work is not contingent on the external manifestation of seriousness and caution, which may or may not yield optimal outcomes. Rather, it is shaped by our intrinsic emotional state towards work. When work is imbued with positivity and love, the challenges encountered can be surmounted through self-determination and perseverance.

(2) Identify and challenge your own limiting beliefs and cultivate a positive attitude towards work. Despite the difficulty in persuading individuals that work can be enjoyable, evidence suggests that work can provide a source of positive energy, facilitate personal growth, and expand one's horizons.

The question thus arises as to why it is not possible to eliminate the various negative feelings and dilemmas that arise in the context of work.

Individuals who are able to discern the nuances of their own experiences may recognize that those who genuinely derive pleasure from their work tend to exhibit a certain degree of tranquility. When they experience fatigue, they engage in mental relaxation and engage in conversation with their colleagues, yet they remain cognizant of their objectives. This state of enjoyment and alignment with one's inner compass serves as an emotional regulator when faced with stress and pressure. They do not immediately demand that they must solve all problems before they can rest, or that interpersonal relationships must reach harmony and friendship as soon as possible before they can relax. Instead, they possess the capacity to maturely view the work process, which may lead to the unexpected development of more positive interpersonal relationships and favorable outcomes.

If the questioner is someone who ranks security as the top priority in their thinking, it is easy to fall into limiting beliefs. These beliefs prevent the individual from relaxing and enjoying the process of working, which in turn hinders their ability to utilize and improve their abilities in solving problems. The first step is to learn to enjoy oneself fully. Once this is achieved, the individual can then attempt to solve the problem at hand. As the ability to solve basic problems improves, the likelihood of falling into repetitive problems decreases.

Best wishes for success!

#Hello, I'm Gu Yi! I'm always humble and consistent, like a valley.

♥ Accept yourself as you are — and you are amazing!

Living in a first-tier city is an adventure! Even if you don't want to move, the surrounding environment will keep you on the go. Even if you choose to lie down after work, it's just your body that's lying down, while our minds are always spinning. The feeling of anxiety inside will only get worse and worse. But what we have to do is accept it first, and then we can take control of our lives!

❀Based on our current understanding of ourselves, we know very well that we are not very adaptable. Jumping from one area to another is indeed a great pressure and challenge. Now that we have come out of it, we realize that the original comfort zone is no longer suitable for us. For this reason, we should comfort ourselves a little more and face the present—and we can do it!

❀Look at the things and emotions that arise in life with an open mind and heart. Everything is happening for a reason! We are all unique and special, and we don't have to fit into a certain mold. By embracing this, we can make positive changes in our daily work and lives. When we do this, we can adapt to society with ease and find joy in life again!

♥ Try looking at the problem from a different perspective!

❀Different people see things differently, and that's a wonderful thing! In our daily work and life, what we see is not the whole picture or the original intention. After all, what we can see is only what others want us to see. Everyone has different sides, and these sides make up a complex person. We choose to associate with and accept those we are willing to, and that's what makes us unique!

❀Embrace everything that comes your way! Allow yourself to be positive, and don't be afraid to embrace your negative thoughts. The spiritual world is always changing, and it's important to recognize that. If you're feeling tired in your daily work and life, take a break! Listen to your inner voice, and have a conversation with yourself. You'll feel so much more relaxed!

Every young person who is struggling to make a living and achieve their dreams has their own difficulties. It may not feel very good, but I absolutely believe that it will all pass! The way to end internal conflict is to face up to its existence and allow it to exist. We can't eliminate it, but we can definitely find a suitable way to live together. I really hope the questioner can find a rhythm that suits them and accept their emotions!

Wishing you the very best!

Hello, host.

I am letmefly, and I'm here to help you and get your feedback.

The host is currently looking to change jobs and has prepared a resume for an interview, but has found the process challenging. Additionally, the host lacks passion for their current role. It's clear that the host is stuck in a vicious cycle. I empathize with the host's anxiety, confusion, helplessness, and self-blame. I want to reassure the host that they are not alone in this.

The host is currently unsure about the new job and is not passionate about the current one. The host is also confused. I reassure the host that I am here to help.

Let me be clear: why are you changing jobs? Is it because the current treatment is not good enough, or because the current job position makes it difficult to achieve your career plan? Is there not enough room for promotion, or are there restrictions on improving your work ability?

If the issue is simply a poor relationship with the new leader, I advise against making a drastic change like switching jobs. Interpersonal challenges are inevitable in any workplace. There will always be individuals, whether colleagues or partners, who are more difficult to communicate with. Seeking to enhance these relationships by changing jobs is an option, but it ultimately depends on the cause of the issue.

The host should not have his own plan or understanding of the new job. He should start by doing his current job well or in a way that is comfortable for him. However, there is always room for improvement. He should rebuild good interpersonal relationships with current colleagues.

The host should take a moment to calm down and think about what their life goals are. If they are not visible in the short term, think about your long-term goals that can be achieved in your current position. If not, what abilities do you need to improve? Go fix the gaps. Fill in the missing pieces. There are always corresponding courses in this online environment, and the host can participate.

The host can also look for career or life planning consultants for a consultation. These professionals can provide valuable advice from a professional point of view.

In today's social environment, confusion is the norm. I'm here to help. I hope you'll give me your feedback, attention, and likes.