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29-year-old woman, dislikes assigned tasks by superiors, reacts with tension?

female teacher secondary school overwhelmed pressure pandemic stress WeChat communication
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29-year-old woman, dislikes assigned tasks by superiors, reacts with tension? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

A female, a psychology teacher at a secondary school currently employed, working for less than a year, feels overwhelmed by the pressure of the tasks assigned by the leadership, even simple ones. She becomes tense upon hearing the headmaster's call. During the pandemic, she frequently checks her WeChat messages to see if the headmaster has left any messages. She dislikes her own traits and finds herself uncomfortable and uneasy in daily life. She acknowledges her desire for others' recognition, being concerned about what others think, and has a tendency to be overly accommodating. She finds conversations with people outside her family and relatives to be draining. How can she change?

Poppy Young Poppy Young A total of 9465 people have been helped

Dear Questioner,

It appears that you possess keen perceptiveness and a personality that is perceived as agreeable. The characteristics of an agreeable personality can be delineated as follows:

1. They are reticent to express their opinions.

Such individuals experience feelings of vulnerability when expressing their thoughts, leading to feelings of isolation and concern about being rejected or attacked by others. Consequently, they tend to conceal their genuine thoughts and opinions, preferring to express them in a more indirect manner.

2. They tend to apologize.

Those with a pleasing personality are fearful of conflict and seek to resolve it through an apology. This represents the primary method of dealing with issues for individuals with this personality type.

3. They will cater to others.

In social interactions, they frequently concede to others' opinions, a tendency that can be attributed to their inherent timidity. They tend to perceive others as more capable than themselves, which often leads to a tendency to defer to their opinions.

Such individuals are perpetually concerned about causing offense to others, yet they are unable to discern their own emotions and voices.

4. They lack the ability to decline requests.

The fear of rejection can also be attributed to the concern that if they reject others, they may be perceived as dislikable. Conversely, if they do not reject others, they may feel compelled to maintain a facade of a positive relationship, which can alleviate feelings of guilt. However, this can result in a significant psychological burden, leading to increased fatigue.

5. Absence of principles or bottom lines

In interpersonal relationships, individuals with a pleasing personality tend to disregard their own needs and desires. They prioritize maintaining harmonious relationships with others, which can lead to a lack of principles and a tendency to compromise their own values in an effort to please others. This mode of relating to others often fails to garner respect from others.

In essence, the defining trait of the agreeable personality type is the tendency to conceal one's emotions and an acute apprehension of conflict, which often manifests as the suppression of one's own needs.

How might this issue be resolved? My recommendation is as follows:

It is crucial to live out one's true self and remain true to one's original aspirations. This original aspiration must be safeguarded with awareness. Regardless of the era or system one is in, one is the sole arbiter of one's inner self. It is imperative not to be deterred by the stares or comments of others. While one cannot control how others perceive them, one can determine one's original aspirations. It is essential to pursue one's capabilities while recognizing that one is not responsible for the actions of others. This allows one to prioritize one's own actions. Hypocrisy and sincerity are antithetical, and living out the self one wants is of paramount importance.

It is evident from your description that you lack confidence and are fearful of being punished if you fail to complete the task assigned by your leader. It is of paramount importance to bolster your confidence. The completion of the work assigned by your leader does not necessitate perfection at all times. We all have our own lives. While working, we should endeavour to complete the tasks assigned to the best of our abilities, and when we are not working, we should relax. We are not machines. We should not attempt to please others at the expense of our own well-being. We should learn to distinguish between work and personal matters, and adhere to the boundaries of our roles. We should gain an understanding of ourselves, relax, and love ourselves.

③: [Learn to be independent and cultivate your personality] It is essential to develop independence in thought, personality, and character. This entails maintaining spiritual independence and the capacity to think critically and solve problems independently. Inconsistency in one's actions and inability to meet personal needs indicate a lack of psychological maturity. To achieve this, one can engage in self-reflection and learn from psychological literature, such as that available on the Yi Xinli platform.

It is my hope that the aforementioned responses will prove beneficial to the individual who posed the initial query.

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Nathanielle Nathanielle A total of 9237 people have been helped

You are inclined to exercise caution and strive for excellence in all endeavors, which can induce feelings of nervousness and anxiety. You may frequently perceive a lack of comfort and ease.

It is not uncommon to exhibit these behaviors when one is newly employed. The underlying motivation may be a desire to excel and avoid errors, as well as a tendency to value the opinions of others.

In a professional setting, it is advisable to concentrate on the task at hand and the process involved, rather than focusing on the outcome.

While the greatest reward is the result of one's best efforts, the outcome is not solely dependent on these efforts.

The implementation of organizational tools can facilitate a greater sense of control over one's work.

For instance, one might utilize a compact notebook for to-do lists, a mobile application for reminders, a schedule, and a task plan.

One strategy for achieving a significant objective is to divide it into smaller, more manageable components and then address each component individually.

Furthermore, as a novice in the professional setting, it is imperative to prioritize the avoidance of missteps and the solicitation of guidance. The errors one makes and the inquiries one poses during this initial phase will prove invaluable in the long run.

This concept can be extended to encompass life in general.

Life is not always straightforward. It is often through mistakes and setbacks that individuals can develop and become stronger.

One might consider these challenges as opportunities for growth. When faced with obstacles, it can be beneficial to remind oneself that these difficulties can be overcome and that personal development is possible.

It is my hope that the aforementioned information is beneficial.

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Comments

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Salvador Anderson Learning is the only thing the mind never exhausts, never fears, and never regrets.

I can totally relate to feeling swamped with work pressures, especially when you're new. It's important to set boundaries and learn to say no sometimes. Taking small steps towards selfacceptance can also make a huge difference.

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Silvia Anderson Failure is a detour, not a dead - end street.

Feeling anxious about every task and message is draining. Maybe focusing on one thing at a time and practicing mindfulness could help ease the tension. It's okay to not be perfect all the time.

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Reagan Miller The more one studies different subjects, the more well - rounded one becomes.

It sounds like you're really hard on yourself. Try to remember that it's alright to seek support from colleagues or even a mentor who can offer guidance and reassurance. Building a supportive network can be incredibly beneficial.

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Bobby Davis Learning is a never - ending adventure.

Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it's okay to feel this way. Seeking professional help might provide strategies to cope better with stress and anxiety. Therapy can be a great place to start.

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Dahlia Anderson To forgive is to embrace the truth that we all make mistakes.

Understanding your need for recognition is a big step. Perhaps working on building confidence in your abilities can reduce the dependency on external validation. Confidence grows with each challenge faced.

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