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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker!
First, give yourself a big hug and comfort your heart, which is crumbling because of the impending end of your marriage!
As a man, I totally get where you're coming from!
You are about to win a career victory! But you also realize that your long-term neglect of your wife has caused the imminent loss of your marriage.
The loss of your family.
This is an incredible opportunity for any responsible man to step up and take control of his life!
We're so excited to help you! Due to the limited information, we are not sure how to help you. We can try to consider the following aspects first:
First, take a deep breath and calm down your anger, grievances, and anxiety. You've got this!
So, let's stay calm and rational!
So, the first thing you need to do is stay calm and think clearly.
Second, it's time to think about what you really want!
If you still want to save your marriage and family, you've got to think about what you say and do so you don't anger your wife.
Your wife is the one at fault, so she probably feels more justified than you do. This is the only way to hide.
You can absolutely protect your self-esteem! All you have to do is face your own inner shame.
Third, you need to know where you went wrong, not your wife's.
Otherwise, you'll just be making things worse for yourself and giving her the chance to leave, even if it's her fault. But you can't point it out!
Unless you want to divorce her as punishment?
You can do this! You just need to find the reason in yourself, such as a long-term lack of necessary communication with your wife.
And don't forget about material needs and emotional needs!
Fourth, find a connection point of love and seize the opportunity to repair it!
Just look at the amazing foundation you've built with your three children and your marriage over the past few years! You absolutely have to believe that you will have
There's so much potential for more points of connection based on shared interests, values, etc.! It'll be like reuniting a broken mirror.
I am the consultant, Mr. Yao, and I will continue to support and care for you!
I'm counselor Yao, and I'm here to support and care about you!
Helpful to me 343
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Comments
I can't imagine how painful and challenging this situation must be for you. It's clear that you're deeply committed to your family and are trying your best to keep everything together. Perhaps it would help to seek professional counseling, both for yourself and possibly couples therapy with your wife. A therapist could provide a safe space to express feelings and work through the issues that have arisen.
It sounds like you've been carrying a heavy burden for a long time. The fact that you're reaching out shows courage. Maybe now is the time to prioritize your own wellbeing and mental health. Taking care of yourself doesn't mean giving up on your family; it means being in a better position to support them. Have you considered talking to a trusted friend or family member about what you're going through?
Your commitment to your children and the desire to maintain the family unit is commendable. However, it's important to recognize that you can't control your wife's decisions. What you can do is focus on creating a stable environment for your kids, even if that means adapting to new circumstances. Sometimes, setting boundaries and accepting reality can lead to unexpected healing and growth for everyone involved.
The pressure you're under is immense, and it's understandable that you feel overwhelmed. It might be helpful to connect with support groups where you can meet others who are facing similar challenges. Sharing experiences and advice with people who truly understand can be incredibly comforting and may offer you some practical solutions as well.
You've already shown great strength by enduring so much. But it's crucial to remember that there are resources available to help you through this. If you ever feel like you're at a breaking point, please reach out to a crisis hotline or a mental health professional immediately. They can provide immediate assistance and guide you towards longerterm support options.