After the mid-term exam, I feel that my existence is worthless. What should I do?

Hello, I'm Gu Yi. I'm a pretty down-to-earth, reliable person, just like a valley.

It's so important to take a moment to calm your heart first.

❀Huge congratulations on getting a short break after the end of the exam! I remember that after the end of the exam, I couldn't wake up every day and often felt dazed, not knowing what I should do. Once the nice, orderly rhythm of life is disrupted, you don't know who you are or what you can do. So at that time, I took a short break and went out to work for a while during the summer vacation.

❀Then you'll really understand your current state of mind. Before the exam, you felt like a panda bear, but after the exam, you found that your treatment had plummeted, so you began to feel a sense of loss. It's okay, sweetheart. This is also a time to test our own strength. We can arrange this period of time to learn a skill or specialty, or go on a trip.

The description mentioned that because of our parents' wrong way of educating us, we have not been able to adjust to our current state in time. We cannot find a way to relax after exams, and we don't know how to let our emotions out. Children, this is normal. Parents are already doing their best to help us become better and give us better conditions, so it's up to us next. And we can do it!

We're here to help you make your life a little more fulfilling!

If you're feeling a bit lost after your exams, why not help out your parents with some chores? It's a great way to show your love and appreciation, and you'll also get to learn a new skill!

If you have a little free time, why not use it to arrange some tasks for yourself? You could even think about the specialty you've always wanted to learn but haven't had the chance due to time constraints.

For example, what is one thing we have always wanted to do, and can we rearrange it now? We need to learn to control the pace of our lives, and I'm here to help!

We've made it! We've worked so hard for three years, and now we're facing the middle school entrance exam. Soon, we'll be ready for the college entrance exam. This is a great time to think about our future goals. What school do we want to go to? What major do we want to study? These things might not seem urgent now, but if we prepare in advance, we'll be ready for them.

Warmest regards!

Greetings. This period of adjustment should be relatively tranquil, yet you appear adrift, somewhat overwhelmed, and burdened by concern. It is evident that you are striving to safeguard your well-being amidst a maelstrom of intricate emotions, which bespeaks a profound sense of unease. In viewing yourself thus, do you aspire to extend him some fortitude?

Let us endeavor to collectively identify strategies that will fortify our resilience.

An examination of the past is necessary to achieve liberation from its constraints.

It is evident that your upbringing by your parents has had a detrimental effect on your psyche. You have consistently striven to meet the expectations of others, to the extent that you are fearful of losing their affection should you fail to perform well. Reflecting on your younger self, who was once plagued by worry and anxiety, do you wish to extend a gesture of comfort? Did such an incident truly occur?

The individual in question may feel a sense of helplessness and loneliness, as though they have been abandoned, due to a perceived lack of competence. It is unclear whether allowing the individual to dwell on this perception could result in a loss of emotional control. In such instances, it may be advisable to refrain from further reflection and instead accept the individual's past self.

The motivation for this behavior may have been a desire to meet the expectations of others or to gain love, whether from parents or from oneself.

This is the self that has been in existence for some time and which I accept. I am grateful to it because it was this self that made me aware of my situation after the college entrance exam. I do not like this self, and this may be an opportunity to start being the self I like.

One may attempt to "ground" oneself and return to the present moment.

You are experiencing profound distress, as though the world has undergone a fundamental transformation. Let us employ the "landing" technique to ascertain the truth. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, then open your eyes and enumerate ten items you can see. Then, consider whether you are secure in the present moment.

One might observe that the external environment appears to be unaltered, that the surrounding circumstances and even the tone of voice used by one's parents remain consistent. There is a desire for change, accompanied by a concern that the absence of change might compromise one's sense of security. However, at this moment, one's sense of security is intact.

Additionally, one may create a "safe island" for oneself. This can be conceptualized as a place of solace and security, devoid of external influences, where one can retreat when feeling distressed. This space should be imbued with elements that evoke comfort and positivity. When experiencing anxiety, apprehension, or unease, one can direct their attention to this "safe island" for a period of respite.

Once one has attempted to accept one's emotions, the subsequent step is to take action.

Despite being aware of one's abilities following an examination, an unexpected state of temporary loss of control may arise, preventing the individual from adhering to established norms and exerting the same level of effort as usual. This can result in feelings of anxiety. However, if one can establish a link with past experiences, accept them, and then identify a method of "safely" transitioning into the present, it may be possible to take incremental steps towards a change in behaviour.

Has there been a film you have long wished to view? Have there been particular dishes you have been eager to sample?

One might inquire as to whether there exists a particular city or playground that has long been the object of one's desire. Similarly, one might also inquire as to which classmates will be missed after graduation.

One might inquire whether there is a musical instrument one has long desired to learn to play or a book one has always wanted to read. It would be prudent to consider that when one shifts one's focus from "I seem to be afraid of something" to "Is there something I can do?" one may experience a slight sense of calm and then act promptly.

Is there any unexpressed sentiment you have harboured towards your parents for an extended period, but have been reluctant to verbalise due to concerns about their potential response and the impact on the relationship? It may be beneficial to consider attempting to express this in a sincere and honest manner.

If verbal communication is not feasible, composing a written missive may be a viable alternative. It is essential to muster the courage to take action. The question remains: can this be done?

It is the obligation of parents to guide their children, and it is the right of children to become their own person. As the book Silent Confessions states, "We spend our whole lives breaking free from the constraints of others and becoming ourselves."

One will learn to confess in a forthright manner and to become the person they aspire to be, rather than becoming the person others desire.

The world and I extend our affectionate regard to you.

Good day, question asker.

I can see that you are experiencing a range of emotions following the conclusion of the examination. These include feelings of emptiness and sadness, uncertainty about the future, and a sense of unease. It is understandable that there is no sense of relief or joy after running a marathon.

Lacking clarity on the desired outcome, you experience a sense of helplessness, distress, and frustration. You perceive a loss of direction and feel that your nine years of effort have been in vain. It is, therefore, understandable to experience these emotions.

The objective set by your family is to pass the high school entrance exam. You feel this is not your true goal because it does not align with your own development path. You feel a sense of loss of participation and accomplishment, and you feel like a marionette controlled by your parents' wishes. This is the root cause of your pain and anger.

Middle school students are children in puberty, at which time physical development is becoming increasingly mature, while psychological and social development lags behind. In the process of self-reflection, the questioner stated that a significant portion of this stems from the parents' misguided approach to education. I consistently live my life in accordance with the expectations of others.

Furthermore, she is concerned that if she does not perform to the best of her abilities, she may lose the respect and admiration of those around her.

The questioner's use of the word "love" indicates a lack of security and a need for love. This is related to the questioner's perception and the usual words and deeds of his parents, which closely link the parents' love for them with their demands on them.

It is not uncommon for parents to say things like, "I love you, I want what's best for you, you should do this and that..." Over time, the child may come to believe that if they don't do what their parents want, their parents won't love them. This can result in a self-evaluation based on parental demands and evaluations, which may in turn lead to the development of a personality that is less independent. This can also contribute to a perception of low self-esteem.

The awakening of self-awareness has caused the questioner to experience anxiety and unease at the conscious level. The anxiety arises from the questioner's concern that if they act in accordance with their own desires, their parents will cease to love them.

In this situation, the questioner must differentiate between their own needs and their parents' love. If they interact with parents who are highly controlling, they must discern which of their parents' demands are reasonable and which are not. They must then communicate with their parents to convey their thoughts and inner needs. When you engage in communication with your parents, they will re-examine the relationship between them and you and some of their previous practices. They will realize that their child is growing up and that some methods are no longer applicable. They will then recognize the need to change their relationship with their child.

Self-esteem is derived from two key elements: self-awareness and a clear sense of identity. If the individual wishes to undergo a change, it is essential to reinforce their sense of identity.

It is important to learn to love, including yourself and your parents. Expressing your needs and having open dialogue is also a way to express love.

Forgiving your parents for their excesses and choosing to reconcile with them is a decision that will allow you to reconcile with yourself. With effective communication, you will be able to manage your emotions more effectively. As you become more satisfied with yourself, you will also rebuild your confidence. The more harmonious the relationship between you and your parents, the stronger the bond. The questioner will be able to feel the growing sense of security between you and your family.

A sense of control over one's life, strong social support from family members, and confidence in one's future prospects without a sense of emptiness or anxiety are the desired outcomes. These outcomes may occur unexpectedly.

I am here to provide guidance and support. I care about you and your well-being.

Hello!

The college entrance exam is over, and it's time for some fun and relaxation! When I saw your headline, it made my heart ache. I'm excited to listen to your story through your words and do what I can to give your soul a spa treatment!

"It's over now." What I see is not a you who has to live for others, but a you who is trying hard to love your parents, and a you who is trying hard to break through in your studies—and you're going to succeed!

As their children, they naturally love them so much!

But they may be good at face-saving, and the reason for this is that they are not strong enough inside and are too self-conscious. Because of a strong sense of inferiority, they compare themselves with others and put all the invisible pressure on their children.

My feeling about the various focused stares from the people around you is that they are depressing. But don't you worry! You were originally expecting the warmth and kindness within, and you'll get it!

As a stranger online, I really, really hope that you will get good grades, support yourself in the future, and follow the path you want to choose!

No matter what the situation is, you can absolutely regain confidence, embrace yourself, keep yourself company, and say to yourself: "Sometimes I am vulnerable and I will encounter failure, but that is because I truly exist above the world."

I'm so excited to share my feelings after embracing the world with you! I love, accept, and embrace myself fully, and I encourage you to do the same. Let's encourage each other to live our best, most authentic lives!

Do you want to know what's absolutely delicious? Do you want to see the most incredible theatrical performance you've ever seen?

Do you want to play badminton or other sports?

Have a blast and stay safe!

Hello, colleague?

I'm an intern cat and a listener at Yixinli.

I'd like to congratulate the students on passing the high school entrance exam. This marks the end of nine years of non-stop learning.

This is also the end of one chapter of our lives! Soon, we'll be entering a new one.

What is the meaning of life?

The meaning of a person's life doesn't depend on how long they've lived, but on how they've lived it.

Every day is an opportunity to find ourselves and realize our self-worth. The most important thing is to have the right values and outlook on life, a positive ideal, and an optimistic attitude.

It doesn't matter if you don't know now. We're both on the path of searching for it. Some people find their meaning early. Some people need a long time to find it. And some people may be searching for meaning their whole lives.

As they say, "You should keep learning throughout your life." As you learn more and grow in your role, the meaning you once identified with may change.

So, what do you think your purpose in life will be?

Make sure you're taking care of your own needs.

In life, we often forget about our own needs because we're too busy worrying about what other people think. As you said, "always living up to other people's expectations."

This can leave you feeling confused about what you really need.

I believe this confusion is your body's way of telling you to "love yourself." When you love yourself, you're happier on the inside and you see the meaning and value in your life.

Sometimes, due to our parents' poor parenting, we may have been neglected when we needed love. And in order to be loved, we may have lost ourselves, always thinking that we can only be loved if we are obedient, and turning ourselves into a humble child.

You don't want to be that child anymore. So, what kind of person do you want to be?

Psychologist Viktor Frankl said, "If you accept your fate, including any suffering that comes with it, and face your challenges head-on, you can still find meaning in your life and remain steadfast, dignified, and selfless, even in the worst of circumstances." (From "Make Your Life Meaningful")

? Find your worth.

? Focus on your spiritual growth.

Most of us now live in comfortable conditions, with no worries about food and clothing, but we could all do with some spiritual nourishment. Some people remain children at heart even though they are adults.

Spiritual growth varies from person to person depending on things like family, experience, and education. That's why each of us, including you, is unique in the world.

When it comes to spiritual growth, developing our ability to think for ourselves is key. It's only when we can think for ourselves that we can truly be free from external influences.

Spiritual growth is a bit like the process of metamorphosis from caterpillar to butterfly. You don't know what kind of butterfly you'll become until you break out of the cocoon.

An open worldview is key.

People with an open worldview are first and foremost accepting of themselves, accepting of both their shortcomings and their strengths.

People with an open worldview can accept others fully, regardless of who they are, their background, status, wealth, or culture. We can all treat them equally. Even when their values differ from our own, we can find a balance of acceptance or approval. (Of course, we cannot accept or approve values that go against morality and ethics.)

Be tolerant and open-minded.

Hello!

Yesterday, we talked about how sadness can come from feeling empty. Today, I'll share ways to fill yourself up and grow stronger.

How do I become strong?

The answer is to "pay attention to your own needs and enhance your sense of value."

Everyone is different, but we all have things in common. You are you because you have a strong feeling that you live your life according to other people's expectations.

Your time, energy, and feelings have been torn apart by these expectations.

"I don't know who I am or what I want. I feel helpless, angry, and hurt," is a cry for help to be able to be oneself again.

We are living in an era of intense internalization. We devote almost all of our time and energy to "how to internalize in order to survive." This prevents us from understanding our own needs. We have been running until today, not knowing what we really need. We should explore "who I am" naturally. We should perceive, discover, and develop. We should stretch towards the next step. But this process has been replaced by "internalization."

If you are busy fulfilling other people's expectations, you are acting to confirm the value of others. You can give up your own needs. Even how you feel may be based on other people's expectations. Not all expectations are wrong. People are social beings, and many of the expectations of others sacrifice uniqueness. To survive and thrive, we must complete the socialization process. These expectations are not love.

We should find a balance between being ourselves and socializing. These are not contradictory. Sometimes, being yourself helps you socialize better. I think one problem with thinking that parents' methods are wrong is that they set socialization goals against our need to grow.

Once you understand this, you know what to do: grow yourself back into a strong person who knows their own needs and how to fulfill them. Human needs are complex and diverse, and they are constantly evolving.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs says that self-actualization is the highest level of human needs. When you explore your needs and try to satisfy them, you are on the path of self-exploration, self-growth, and self-actualization. You are enhancing your own value and experiencing your sense of value.

Try different things and be aware of your feelings and needs. Keep going. I answered a similar question before and will post the link here for your reference: https://m.xinli001.com/qa/100806650?is_share=1&sharetype=app

https://m.xinli001.com/qa/100806650?is_share=1&sharetype=app

You will also be confused, struggle, be frustrated, and sad. But you chose this, so it's all unique to you. This self is more likely to be real and not sway with others.

You will no longer fear not being loved because you will realize that you are worthy of respect and love. You can attract others to love you without having to lose yourself in order to please others.

The original poster's question was "What is the right way of thinking that I can adopt...?" Thinking is just a tool to help us organize experiences. We cannot use it to come up with answers without material.

It's a lifelong journey and an adventurous one. It may mean your state of existence isn't as good as following others' expectations, and you'll suffer more hardships.

But that's the price of being yourself. Life is an adventure.

Are you ready to live your life to the fullest? You have a choice.

Share another answerer's tag from Yixinli: "Devote yourself to life."

The world loves you.

Hello, I see your description. It seems that you are in a challenging situation, trying to move forward, but you're uncertain about the direction and it seems that you're facing obstacles. No matter what the situation is and what kind of experience it is, I can see that you're continuously learning and evolving. You're growing out of ignorance and thinking as you become aware, which are interconnected.

The entrance exam is over, and the next step is entering high school. I would like to extend my heartfelt congratulations to you, young man! You are about to embark on a journey where dreams come true. Before you set off, I would still like to have a brief conversation with you about a few things that might not be entirely relevant.

Although I left school many years ago, I can appreciate that the current college entrance examination is no less challenging than those I faced. I imagine you have worked tirelessly for nine years, studying consistently, doing exercises between classes, reading late into the night, and attending weekend cram schools. I admire your resilience in persevering under such intense pressure. Could you share how you managed to stay motivated and keep moving forward?

It's not easy. It's possible that you may have had to give up a lot behind the scenes, such as leisure and entertainment and your own hobbies.

⏩There is never just one possibility in life, which is why we are encouraged to think for ourselves as we grow up, to try and find out, to experience different feelings. And aren't you looking? You have found it too – you want to experience playing to the full, to feel that feeling of having had a great time. But at the moment, it seems that "playing" is presenting you with a challenge, making you more uncertain about the best way forward.

It's important to remember that where you invest your time is where you will reap the rewards. It's natural to be unsure of what you want and what you want to do. I'm the same; I don't know how to play.

If I might make a suggestion, perhaps the best way forward would be to simply go and find it, try it out, make the most of the holiday, and take your time. It might be helpful to approach it with a high degree of relaxation, and while you're at it, you could also see if there are any other needs that come up. I say this because I can see that you have a lot of thoughts about self-growth and awareness, which is a great advantage.

Your needs are always there, it's just your nature. They're playing hide-and-seek with you, and you're trying to find them. It might seem a bit childish, but it's understandable that you're having so much fun with it because it wants to see you get anxious and angry. How long do you think you'll keep up this standoff?

If your efforts are successful, it would be beneficial to calmly and generously satisfy your needs. It is important to remember that we are discussing legitimate indulgence needs. What kind of discovery might you make when you love to think? You are in charge of exploring this map.

I would like to offer a friendly reminder to take your time and plan carefully before making any decisions. It is important to remember that this process may seem to have a kind of magic that can draw people in a hurry, and it can be challenging to get out again.

Young man, it's getting late, and I'm starting to feel tired. But it suddenly occurs to me that you seem to have a question about "how to view one's own existence through correct thinking." Hmm... What are you talking seriously about philosophical issues for? Your existence is already a proof of itself. Then I will also philosophically discuss with you seriously. You are you, and there is no need to think or prove your existence. It is already valuable. (Where does it come from that there is a correct way? This is an adult secret, I'll tell you first.)

Hello, dear questioner! I saw what you said: the middle school entrance exam is finally over, but I'm not at all happy and relaxed as I had imagined. Instead, I feel extremely empty and sad, and even feel like the world has changed...become strange and unsettling.

The college entrance exam is a big deal at your age. It's a big step, a turning point. If you do well, you can keep studying. If you don't, you might have to start working or learn a trade. From what you've said, I get the feeling you want to do well on the exam. There's still a long way to go, and you can take a little break to prepare for high school.

You said, "I know that a large part of this comes from my parents' wrong way of educating me. I always live my life according to other people's expectations. I'm also afraid that if I don't do well, I'll lose the love of the people around me. Well done for having a clear head! You already know about your parents' wrong way of educating you. Parents' views are related to their culture, environment and era. You can understand them. Sometimes we can't fight against our parents, but we can maintain our own position and opinions and have a discerning mind.

You said, "Now that it's over, I don't even know what I want."

Oh, you still have a long way to go in life, sweetheart. It's not over yet!

I know it can be tough, but try to make a list of plans, get into college, and have a big dream. You've got this!

You have to treat learning as a pleasure and work hard for your dreams. I can tell you're treating learning as a burden, which is why you feel pain.

My dear young friend, after the middle school entrance exam, take a few days to relax, make another plan, and prepare in advance for high school life. I wish you every success in your studies!

Hello, sweetheart. I'm a heart coach. I'll let you go, keep you warm, and listen to your story.

You need to understand the meaning of the word "pain." Pain and pleasure are the two poles of a pendulum, and life is like a pendulum.

We oscillate between pain and boredom.

The theory of the emotional pendulum is clear: suppressing pain also suppresses happiness. This naturally leads to a decrease in emotional perception.

Resisting pain only makes it more intense. That's why we have the term "pain relief."

This plot is common in movies and TV dramas: a person fulfills his wish to avenge his father but loses motivation. He collapses, like a deflated balloon, because he isn't living for himself but for his father.

Your feelings are no different. The college entrance exam is over, and this is the result that your parents wanted, not what you wanted. You are just a tool for them to achieve their "wish," and you have reached a periodic goal. You are a "puppet" in their plan, so you need to find a way to be happy.

People have to live for themselves once. They need to adjust themselves and change the status quo.

1. Look at problems from multiple perspectives to see the truth and gain more choices.

You say your parents' methods of education were wrong. You say you've always lived your life according to other people's expectations. You say you're afraid you're not good enough to be loved. You're already aware of these things. Seeing gives you the right to choose. Seeing is the beginning of change.

During the middle school years, your main focus should be on completing your studies. However, it is also important to develop your self-awareness and interpersonal skills.

You crave affirmation and acceptance from your parents, teachers, classmates, and those around you. You desire trust and respect. Consequently, you experience confusion, resentment, and anger as you embark on a journey of self-discovery.

Your parents' control and their desire for you to do everything according to their demands and plans make you feel mentally distressed.

The ABC rule of emotions is simple: A is the triggering event, B is the belief resulting from the perception and evaluation of the triggering event, and C is the result of the behavior. Your emotions have nothing to do with the event itself, but everything to do with your perception of the event.

Perception: This is called "belief," and it's an individual's view of things. There's a conflict between what the brain thinks should be—that we should live freely and be happy however we want—and what reality is—that we have to live by the rules and follow the plan laid out by our parents.

Put yourself in your parents' shoes. They see you as an inexperienced child and believe they need to help you plan and achieve your goals in life.

The motivation behind their actions is to love you. While their methods may not be the most effective, they are driven by a genuine desire to support and protect you. Take, for instance, the recent reform of the secondary school entrance examination. This has understandably caused concern among parents, who worry that their children will not be able to continue their education at a traditional high school and will instead have to pursue a vocational path.

They unintentionally transfer their anxieties to their children.

It is important to separate the identity of parents from their actions and see the good intentions behind them. You should also accept the imperfections of your parents from the heart.

?2. Speak up, communicate clearly with your parents, and gain independence and autonomy in life.

There are three types of psychological pain that require special attention.

1. Helplessness (powerlessness): This is a false belief. Others can do it, but I can too. Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time. It only causes pain and makes it less likely that you will succeed.

2. Hopeless: limiting oneself to a small circle, clinging to old ways, and refusing to innovate, as if one's whole life were just one day. This is "impossible" and restrictive thinking.

3. Worthlessness: You must not measure your value by things. This can lead to giving up your career or even your life.

Growing up naturally brings out all kinds of emotions. There's no question that suffering has a function. It can elevate the soul and give our lives more depth.

The bitterness of life is part of life. You can turn it into strength by acknowledging it. Accepting it and letting go of the fight against suffering can reduce suffering by 50%.

You can communicate more effectively with your parents. Express your views and feelings directly so they know you're not the little child who knew nothing a few years ago.

You must also listen to their views and feelings. The goal is to reach a consensus, maintain emotional fluency, and satisfy each other's needs within your respective abilities. This is how you will find a solution to the problem.

Happiness is directly related to a person's internal motivation.

A person feels happy when they obtain external, tangible things such as material goods. They also feel happy when they obtain the spiritual needs of recognition, affirmation, praise, acceptance, and love from others. These are the sources of a person's motivation.

But once these external supports are gone, he will fall into a state of emptiness, loneliness, and helplessness once again.

When a person turns their attention from seeking external gains to cultivating themselves internally, the initiative is theirs to take back because they are the ones taking the initiative.

You can and should enjoy the sense of worthiness in the process of studying your best and working hard to achieve your goals. You can also experience the sense of abundance in building relationships and friendships with your classmates. In addition to academic performance as the final result, you can and should have more happiness if you want. Because the initiative is always in your hands.

I am here to tell you that problems are never problems. It is how we interpret them that matters.

I am confident that the above will be helpful to you. And I love you, the world, and myself.

If you want to continue communicating, click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom. I will communicate and grow with you one-on-one.

Hello!

I like your question and your self-statement! You have a keen eye and are aware of yourself. If you weren't sincere or lacked courage, you wouldn't have such a clear description and a heartfelt question.

Good job!

The host's three-part question seems to have found a logical path to finding an answer: first, see what kind of existence you are, then find your needs and work hard to fulfill them.

I'm sorry for your loss. I'll answer in two days.

How do you see yourself?

From a humanistic point of view, existence is valuable. People are different from the pens we use. Pens exist because people need them to function. Their value lies in their use. Because of this value, people make them exist.

If it's no longer useful, it doesn't need to exist.

People are not like this. We were not created for a particular purpose. Each of us exists before being defined by a function, just like every atom in the universe. Everyone is like a speck of dust in the universe. Existence is value.

Believing in your value as a person, not just as a tool, is the best way to see your own existence.

Even if I am dying and no longer useful to society, I am still a complete person who is valuable and worthy of respect. I choose to revere, believe in, and love life, no matter who it is.

Our sadness often comes from people treating us like machines. You are despised if your exam results are unsatisfactory. People are more than machines for learning and exams. Believing people are machines stops us from respecting ourselves and our creativity.

I understand your feelings. How can you not be sad when you are deprived of the opportunity to develop your humanity?

We are forced to study for exams to prove our existence and value. When the exam is over, our entire sense of value collapses.

The fear of losing the love of others is a way of describing our inner disbelief in our own existence and value. We need the love of others to confirm that we are worthy of respect and love.

Our feelings are accurate. We are empty. We have what others have stuffed into us. It doesn't belong to us.

This is why we feel so empty and worthless. So, embrace your sadness. You have the right to feel sad.

I'll finish tomorrow.

I love you, world.

Good morning,

My name is Liu Yong, and I am a psychological listener. You left a message three hours ago, which indicates that you got up at 6 a.m. Given your age, it is advisable to sleep in after a major event. However, you got up so early, which suggests that you are experiencing anxiety and restlessness, as you mentioned. You possess an exceptional ability to perceive your emotional state and have a clear understanding of your own state, which is uncommon. It is important to recognize that many adults lack the ability to perceive their inner state, let alone the fact that you are only a teenager of 15 or 16. Therefore, I would like to extend my congratulations; you have a strong foundation for self-awareness.

It is important to recognize your own strengths and abilities, and then identify a clear path forward in life. This is not an easy task, but it is certainly achievable. As you continue to learn and adapt, your path will become increasingly clear, provided you maintain confidence and persevere. Let's now analyze the challenges you are currently facing.

1. Following the conclusion of the middle school entrance examination, you experience a profound sense of emptiness and sadness, rather than the anticipated joy or relief. Have you ever considered the underlying causes of this emotional state? Is it the uncertainty surrounding your middle school entrance examination results?

Or are you still uncertain about your post-college plans? Or is there another issue at hand?

This is a matter that requires thorough deliberation, as it will determine your ability to resolve your current challenges.

2. Previously, I was solely focused on academic pursuits and lacked personal life objectives. Consequently, I am concerned that if I underperform in the imminent high school entrance examination, my parents may be disheartened and withdraw their affection. This perception may appear to be the immediate reality, but in truth, they still hold you in high regard. It is simply that they perceive academic achievement as a crucial aspect and hope that you will also prioritize it.

3. You are now a teenager of about 15 years old, with a high level of self-awareness, and you want to be able to control your own life. This is a positive indication that you have the necessary awareness and motivation to face your future life independently. In ancient times, at this age, you could join the army to defend your country, or study hard and take the imperial examinations. However, the current social and economic context is different. The quality of life is high, and the wider society has a tendency to undervalue children's abilities, assuming that children are only capable of studying. In fact, there is a powerful force surging within you, right? It is therefore important to first identify your future aspirations, the kind of person you want to become, and the steps you need to take to achieve that goal.

Then, engage in a discussion with your family. It is important to recognize that your exposure to society has been limited to the school environment, and that there are many aspects of life with which you are not yet familiar. It is essential to accept this reality. When sharing your thoughts with your family, it is crucial to listen attentively to their opinions. As a teenager, it is vital to have confidence in your ability to think critically and communicate effectively. This process of sharing ideas and opinions is an essential part of personal growth.

4. With regard to the matter of the middle school entrance examination, it is important to consider the reality of the situation. The current policy of the state is to separate students after the middle school entrance examination: those who perform well are permitted to continue their studies at the high school level, while those who perform poorly are directed to technical school. This policy is, in fact, correct, but it is not the final result. The key is your own positioning. What kind of person do you think you are, and what kind of abilities do you possess? Regardless of the outcome for the time being, as long as you work hard and persistently, regardless of which path you choose, you will continue to improve. However, it is essential to understand that the knowledge you gain now will serve as the foundation for learning anything in the future. Therefore, regardless of how well you perform before the middle school entrance examination, you must make up for it in the future. The future holds great promise, because you are still a teenager, and you have numerous opportunities.

5. Regarding a sense of value, this is closely related to the environment in which you grew up. Therefore, the teacher here cannot help you sort it out all at once. However, you can believe that, regardless of past experiences, from the moment you saw my words, someone has recognized your potential. You are a bright young man, and that someone is me. At the same time, I also hope that there is someone else who can see your potential, and that is yourself.

Should you wish to discuss something in more detail, please do not hesitate to send me a private message.

I am Liu Yong, a psychological counselor, and I extend my greetings to you on behalf of the world and myself.