Are girls at the age of fifteen already grown up enough to bear family responsibilities?

Hello, I'm Teacher Bao Bao.

Maybe you've already made some new decisions, but you still want to talk to me?

I first searched for the relevant legal provisions.

How old is the duty to support?

Parents must support and educate their children until they can live independently. This duty lasts as long as necessary.

Parents must support their children until they turn 18. After that, it's up to the child to support themselves.

Parents only have to support and educate their children who are over 18 and don't have a job or income.

Living independently means having an income from work and an independent source of income.

If citizens aged 16-18 use their own income as their main source of living, they are considered to have full civil capacity. This means that parents' legal obligation to support and educate their children can also be considered fulfilled.

If they are working and earning money, they are financially independent. Their parents have fulfilled their duty to support them. They no longer have a legal obligation to support them unless they lose their ability to work.

What are your feelings after reading your message?

You're a loving and responsible child!

You took care of your younger brother and grandmother for half a month. That shows you have great qualities and resources. You can "run a household." You can cook. You are strong, courageous, self-disciplined, warm, and attentive. These are valuable abilities and assets on your path to adulthood.

When your parents were 15, they probably had to work to support the family. They've gained a lot of experience since then, and I believe you've inherited some of their qualities.

If you can, talk to your parents. Tell them you understand their struggles. Thank them. Tell them your future plans and how you'll work hard for them.

If you can't continue your studies after 16, you can always support yourself. You can learn and apply what you learn in many ways.

Your question reminds me of a song, "Continue – For Your Fifteen-Year-Old Self." Life can only be guided by the dreams in your hands. Don't give up, don't lose heart, and don't let down that pure self within you.

You'll thank yourself one day.

Hello!

Fifteen is the age to take the high school entrance exam in the third year of junior high. This is a very critical period. The entrance exam can't determine your whole life, but it can make your life less winding.

The family conditions of the student may not be good. The parents want the student to support the family, but the student doesn't want to.

Whose idea is right? I think you and your parents are right.

Our ideas come from our perceptions. Our parents worked to support the family when they were 15, so they think that's the right age to support a family.

We think learning is the most important thing, and we are right. We can't force our parents to change, but we want things to go our way.

What should we do? Should we argue with our parents or ask for help?

I don't think any of the above are appropriate. Even if we succeed, it will cause tension.

I suggest that students talk to their parents. Parents think we are poor at studying and that hard work is useless.

Let's make a deal with our parents. If we work hard and pass the high school entrance exam, they'll listen to us and let us keep studying. If not, we'll take care of the family.

If we work hard and try, we'll be more confident and our parents will see the difference.

The key to success is to become better. I told my classmate not to try to please others, but to live for oneself. If you live for yourself, you must fight for yourself.

You'll thank yourself for struggling today.

I hope this helps.

Thank you. I'm Jiusi from Yixinli.

Good day, I appreciate the opportunity to connect with you. I understand that at 15, you may not be ready to take on the challenges that come with adulthood. However, it's essential to recognize that life presents a range of issues that require resolution.

As the eldest child in the family, you will undoubtedly be expected to assume significant responsibilities. However, I am uncertain as to what your parents mean by "shouldering the family."

The decision to cook for the family or to seek employment to earn money is a significant one. This text raises concerns not just about you, but also about your parents.

They want you to mature more quickly and provide assistance with various aspects of life. However, their assertion that you are not adept at studying and that it is futile to try is misguided. Could it be that they lived in a different era or were influenced by external factors that led them to make such a statement?

In terms of academic pursuits, it is possible to gain admission to a reputable university if one begins to apply oneself at the age of 15. For many students from less privileged backgrounds, this represents a viable pathway to success.

You may wish to discuss the matter with your parents or ask a trusted elder or teacher to assist you in persuading them.

It is true that a lack of understanding from the original family can affect our growth. However, this influence can be divided into two distinct categories.

Some individuals are reluctant to embrace adulthood. Despite lacking financial stability, they persist in pursuing fantasies and eschew the responsibilities of adulthood. This ultimately leads to a lack of meaningful achievements. On the other hand, there are those who can cook with the same proficiency as they can navigate the academic rigors of junior high and high school. During my formative years, I gained valuable experience through summer employment and odd jobs. My parents were unable to provide constant guidance during my childhood and adolescence, necessitating my independent navigation of challenges. This period of self-reliance has shaped my understanding of the importance of maturity and growth.

Believe in yourself and maintain an optimistic outlook. You may find inspiration in videos like "Touching China."

Some individuals are indulged at the age of 15 and have never experienced the act of touching water with their fingers, while others are expected to contribute to household tasks at the age of five. Each individual's life trajectory is unique, but the ability to adapt and overcome challenges is crucial for success.

It is always advisable to discuss with your family any issues that you are unable to resolve.

We all encounter various challenges in our professional lives. It is essential to demonstrate resilience, address difficulties directly, and pursue our goals with courage.

I am confident that the future holds great promise.

Hello, sweetheart. I'm a Heart Explorer coach. I'll listen to you.

Your words show confusion and helplessness. You are 15 and still of school age, but your parents want you to "work" and support the family like an adult.

Their rejection made you doubt yourself and feel worthless. You even had anxious thoughts: "Am I not supposed to study anymore?"

Let's hug and talk about your problems.

Each age has different tasks.

Children are their parents' hope. Before they become adults, their parents support them because children can't live independently, especially financially.

So, right now, it's mostly about school. You can't just focus on getting into college. But, if you get a degree, you'll have more job options later.

At 15, she was the eldest daughter. She should have set a good example for her younger siblings.

But parents shouldn't stop you from going to school just because you're not good at studying.

Parents and children are equal. Parents should respect their children. Criticizing and rejecting children can lead to low self-worth, low self-esteem, sensitivity, suspicion, and a lack of security.

If you can study, it's a good idea. If you want to study, that's another matter. In the future, you'll need a certain cultural foundation to compete. You and your parents need to understand this.

The movie What Makes a Family is about a foreign story, but it shows how some parents are ignorant, which affects their children.

2. Parents have limits too.

You should be in junior high school.

If your parents say this, they have their limitations. They started working and earning money at 15.

"Children of the poor grow up to be responsible," and the son preference mentality is still felt in some places.

Parents think girls don't need to study because they'll get married and need to support the family.

Your parents are also affected by this way of thinking and are victims of that era.

Understand them from this perspective. You also need to be able to think for yourself, communicate with your parents, and express your feelings and opinions. If the family needs you to work to support them, you can work together to find a solution, like taking on more household chores to free up time for your parents to work.

If your family can afford it, try your best in school. This will make your parents proud. Use your knowledge to change your fate and change their views on you.

I hope this helps. I love you.

To keep talking, click "Find a coach" in the top right or bottom. I'll chat with you one-on-one.

Hello question asker. I'm happy to answer your question.

First, give the questioner a little strength. In the original family, the parents' responsibility has fallen on you, a 15-year-old, and you feel overwhelmed.

At 15, you're still growing up. Parents must raise their children and support the elderly. I don't know why the author's parents shifted all this onto him. Isn't it wrong to make a child bear obligations that parents should bear?

Parents must support their children until they are 18. Until the questioner turns 18, the parents must supervise and support him.

The questioner says that because he is bad at studying, his parents belittle him and make him take care of the elderly and do his younger brother's chores. The government says that every child can go to school for nine years. Should the questioner be kept from school just because he is bad at studying?

Parents are being irresponsible when they make the topic master take on the whole family's burden. The topic master will feel pain, loneliness, and helplessness. We can't change our parents' words, deeds, and attitudes, but we can change our own response.

How should the questioner respond to their parents' belittling and the household chores? Here are my thoughts:

Understand why your parents treat you this way.

Why did the parents treat the questioner this way? Were they treated this way when they were young? Were their parents treated this way by the older family members?

There were no learning opportunities, only endless chores. This pattern will affect how they treat their children.

They think studying is useless for girls, but I want to say that to change yourself and reach different levels, you have to work hard.

Your parents may treat you this way for a reason, but that doesn't mean you have to forgive them. Some hurts will never be forgotten. You just need to understand, but not forgive.

Don't confront your parents.

If your parents are being inappropriate, don't confront them. You still depend on them for things. If they've asked you to do housework, try to do it without affecting your studies.

If your parents scold or beat you, stay away from them. Find a safe place to hide.

Don't argue with your parents. If you're upset, leave. You don't have to listen to them insult you.

If it gets worse, you can leave and go stay with friends or relatives.

Tell your parents what you think.

What are your thoughts when your parents belittle your studies and assign you household chores? You can try to calmly express your thoughts to them when they are in a good mood.

You can express your rights, what parents should do, whether their belittling is excessive, whether you accept their apportionment of housework, what you hope they will do, and what you cannot stand. You can say, "I know I may not be very smart, and you want to reduce the amount of housework, but please don't belittle me."

"

Don't tell your parents everything.

Every child has secrets. The questioner doesn't have to share them with their parents. When someone bullies you, would you tell them everything?

The questioner doesn't have to tell their parents all their thoughts, dreams, and worries, especially since the parents are belittling them.

The questioner can share these thoughts with teachers, friends, and relatives they trust.

Resources for support

The question asker can find resources to support themselves. Parents who belittle and assign chores can make the question asker feel inferior and depressed.

You don't have to face them alone. Get help from friends, relatives, classmates, teachers, and others. With support, you'll feel better when facing your parents. The more support you have, the less lonely you'll feel and the more confident you'll be.

Call the helpline.

If you don't have anyone you can trust, you can ask for help from your neighborhood committee, street office, or women's federation. You can also call a hotline for help. Your parents making you feel helpless will make you feel very alone. You can ask for help from other people or organizations. They will be able to help you and protect your rights.

Call 12338 for counseling or shelter.

I hope this helps.

Good morning,

It can be challenging to fully comprehend the difficulties at hand, to navigate the confusion and helplessness, to formulate independent thoughts, and to recognize the need for guidance without feeling empowered to take action.

I wonder if, at the age of 15, one might be considered an adult.

From a legal and social perspective, the standard for adulthood is generally considered to be over the age of 18. It would be interesting to understand why this age was chosen.

It could be argued that, having reached the age of 18, a child has matured both mentally and in terms of their outlook on the world. This would suggest that they are capable of taking responsibility for independent living and being able to withstand the combined pressure factors (internal pressure, independent financial pressure) that come with it. It might be suggested that children under the age of 18 can only be considered older children, not adults.

Based on the strict division of age, it could be perceived that fifteen years old is still an age that requires care and support. It may be beneficial for a young person of this age to have access to material and emotional support, which could contribute to their overall well-being and development.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether it is excessive for parents to ask for help with household chores.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider why it is often seen as excessive, rather than choosing one of two options. It might be beneficial to reflect on whether it is more beneficial to listen to your parents and take their advice, or to focus on your own needs and excel in your studies.

As family members, when faced with a situation where the family lacks manpower and needs a helping hand, it is important to recognize that there is no situation where one person is in charge. The most effective approach to solving the problem is through mutual understanding and respect for each other.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider the situation from the perspective of the parents.

It would be beneficial for parents to receive more education and learn about scientific parenting concepts.

Child: may lack maturity and experience in taking responsibility.

In this situation, during the critical period of a child's growth, when the child needs to obtain nutrients to develop themselves, it would be beneficial for parents to meet the child's needs as much as possible. In other words, they should allow the child to make their own decision, whether to continue going to school or find another way out. It would be unwise for parents to use their own needs and the need for someone to help take care of the family situation as an authoritative position to block the child's development and force the child to return to the family and make unwilling sacrifices.

As a child, at the age of fifteen, I am still learning and growing, and I recognize that my ideas may not always be fully considered or considerate. For example, I may not fully appreciate my parents' position and hard work, and I tend to prioritize my own desires and trying to please myself. This kind of situation can create challenges in family dynamics, and it's important to recognize that we can all benefit from working together to find solutions.

For families facing challenges, it is often more beneficial to focus on supporting one another and working together, rather than on pointing out differences or making demands.

How might we learn to regulate our inner emotions and deal with problems in a more constructive manner?

It would be beneficial to communicate honestly with your parents about your true feelings.

As previously discussed, parents may sometimes be unable to take responsibility for their words and actions. This can lead to difficulties in communication and the use of ineffective methods to address parent-child relationships. This may, in turn, contribute to the exacerbation of conflicts. In the future, parents may also become increasingly distant from their children due to an inability to recognize their own issues.

One way to avoid conflicts is to communicate with your parents in depth and express your position and ideas courageously. If your parents are unable to respect you, it is important to remember that it is their issue, not yours. They cannot force you to make sacrifices for them. However, as a family member, you can express your willingness to share the workload as much as possible. It is also essential to prioritize your studies.

It would be beneficial to enhance awareness and learn to grow.

At fifteen years of age, although still a minor, is a stage of learning and understanding life. It would be beneficial to improve your own understanding, have a plan for yourself, and have a clear understanding of the role relationships among family members. This way, no matter how many difficulties you encounter in the future, you may be better equipped to make decisions with a true will, rather than feeling at a loss for words and unable to distinguish between the relationships between responsibilities and obligations.

It may be helpful to accept yourself and reconcile with your original family.

It is often observed that children from economically disadvantaged backgrounds tend to mature at a faster pace than their counterparts from more privileged circumstances. These children often face more challenging circumstances, both within their families and in their external environments. Such pressures can potentially disrupt their inner equilibrium. It is, therefore, crucial to prioritize the well-being of one's emotional health.

It is important to remember that facing difficulties is a natural part of life. Accepting information as it comes, sharing what you can, and not feeling forced to do things are all important steps. At the heart of these steps is the ability to accept yourself and reconcile with your own family of origin.

I hope you can persevere, and I wish you the best!

Hello! I totally get where you're coming from.

"Recently, my parents told me that you have grown up and should shoulder the family responsibilities." What do your parents mean? Do they want you to do more housework to help them take care of your younger brother and grandmother? Or are they asking you to earn money to support the family?

You're now 15 years old, which is the perfect age to start studying! It doesn't matter how well you're doing in school, it's crucial to study hard and build a strong foundation for your future success.

Fifteen is a great age! Many people can help their parents with some household chores, but when it comes to earning money to support the family, they are too young.

It's a great idea to find out what your parents really think and also sort out your own real thoughts. That way, you can solve the problem in a targeted way!

Absolutely! You can absolutely take on more household chores and help your parents take care of your younger brother and grandmother while you handle your studies.

If your parents ask you to stop studying and go out to work, you should definitely tell them your true thoughts, communicate with them, and seek their understanding and support!

Don't let poor academic performance or complaints from parents get in the way of your studies! This is a crucial time for you to focus on your education. With hard work and a good method, you can improve your grades and achieve your goals.

Your parents have a simple and pure outlook on life. You have your own independent thoughts, and you also have realistic family difficulties. But you can convince them! You can fight for your ideal life and learning situation. You can even share some of the family's worries.

Hello, I'm Gu Yi, and I'm excited to connect with you! I'm always humble and consistent, and I'm eager to share my insights with you.

I really hope my answer to the question of growing up is useful to you, based on your description!

Now, let's dive into the exciting topic of growing up!

Everyone has a different understanding of growing up, and age is just the most basic measurement. So, let's dive into the exciting question of whether 15 years old is old enough to take on household chores!

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to this question. While 18 is the age most people consider to be adulthood, 15 is still a pretty mature age. Wouldn't it be great if life could be like this? There's no standard answer in life, and that's what makes it exciting!

Growing up is an amazing journey! Everyone's living environment is different, so the timing and state of inner maturity are also different. This allows us to embrace the unique path that's right for us. If we feel in our hearts that we have grown up, then we can treat ourselves like big kids and have fun! If our hearts still want to rely on our parents, then we can also learn to be independent while accepting our parents' love. After all, this is a path that we must ultimately take, and it's an incredible adventure!

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of growing up because everyone's situation is different. And since you haven't mentioned much about your own state of life, you get to decide what growing up means to you! It's a complicated and simple topic all at once. It's complicated because growing up requires preparation in all aspects of your life. But it's simple because you are willing to take responsibility for your own life and state.

Now, let's talk about housework!

The issue of housework is a complex one, and it can lead to some pretty heated debates. There's no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of whether it should be done and whether it's something you need to do when you grow up. The only thing that can be confirmed is whether you want to do it and whether you're willing to do it.

Parents have the amazing opportunity to do housework in addition to their work! Children nowadays have the incredible chance to have someone else do everything except study, which gives us the chance to develop our practical and life skills. This aspect will also directly affect our learning ability, because the topic of learning is too broad. In addition to what is in the books, there are still many aspects to learn. This is why after entering society, what is examined is our comprehensive strength, not the strength of a single subject. Sharing the workload for parents is a wonderful way to show filial piety, and self-improvement for oneself is a great way to stay motivated!

It's all good!

As we have heard, children of the poor learn to be independent at an early age. When there are no conditions to build on, everyone has to learn to be self-reliant. And people are the same: we will ultimately have to face life alone. But that's okay! Having an additional skill gives us an advantage. In this way, doing housework also has some benefits for us. The most important thing is your own consideration.

Wishing you the very best!

Greetings,

I am in a position to offer you some advice.

From your description, you are a 15-year-old girl. Recently, your parents informed you that you have reached an age where you are expected to assume the responsibilities of a family member. However, you perceive yourself as still being in a developmental stage where your focus should be on academic pursuits. Consequently, you question the rationale behind expecting you to bear the burden of family life at this stage of your life.

This situation is likely to be a source of considerable confusion.

Furthermore, you are not solely responsible for your studies; you also assist with domestic tasks on occasion. However, from the parents' perspective, your academic performance is not optimal. You are aware that you have exerted considerable effort, yet the outcomes have not been as favorable as desired.

They observed this behavior and concluded that you were unfit to study, so they instructed you to assume the family burden.

Furthermore, your daily life is also affected by your parents' undermining behaviour due to your poor academic performance. It is likely that you have always felt aggrieved. At the same time, you have plans for your future and a certain understanding of your true preferences.

At this age, the adolescent may perceive their parents as employing their own cognitive processes to structure and influence their life. This perception may elicit feelings of control and opposition, leading to a psychological state of resistance and a desire to rebel.

One must first consider whether 15 years of age is truly an appropriate age to assume the responsibilities of a family unit.

Indeed, the age of 15 is typically considered the onset of adolescence. This period is characterized by rapid cognitive development, during which individuals are capable of absorbing a substantial amount of knowledge. If an individual does not fully comprehend the knowledge acquired during this period, but instead prematurely assumes the responsibility of supporting their family, it is not that their life will necessarily be adversely affected, but rather that their theoretical knowledge may be less comprehensive than their practical knowledge.

When one chooses to engage with the realities of life during one's period of study, the experiences and insights gained from one's lived experiences serve to provide a counterbalance. When one is confronted with a particularly challenging aspect of life, the other aspects serve to offer a sense of equilibrium and resilience. It is, therefore, essential to engage in a process of reflection to ascertain whether one's inclinations align with a learning-centric approach.

Alternatively, would you prefer the type that supports the family?

Indeed, parents have indicated that they began assuming familial responsibilities at the age of 15, a period that preceded their own entry into adulthood.

The parents' generation experienced significant challenges, including a higher age of marriage and the absence of the internet. In contrast to the current era, which is characterized by the pervasiveness of mobile phones and information, the upbringing and exposure of the previous generation were considerably more limited.

As a result of their lack of connection to the contemporary era, they tend to perceive past experiences as a source of security, and they are inclined to offer their perspectives on various matters.

Nevertheless, it is imperative to consider whether this approach is still applicable in the modern era. While their counsel cannot be dismissed outright, it is crucial to evaluate its suitability in the present context.

If one is inclined to pursue learning, assist with domestic responsibilities on occasion, and provide familial support when needed, then there is no significant issue.

The initial step is to recognize that parents are likely to perceive their child's academic performance as unsatisfactory and may encourage them to abandon their studies and pursue an alternative lifestyle. It is plausible that this is their underlying motivation.

In light of the prevailing circumstances, it is possible to engage in constructive dialogue with one's parents. If they express views such as "learning is futile" or "if you perform poorly, you might as well not study," it is possible to convey one's passion for learning.

Even if one claims to be unproficient in a subject, grades are of no consequence. The knowledge acquired in the classroom will prove invaluable in supporting one's family in the future.

In the contemporary era, knowledge is of particular importance. Furthermore, we are cognizant of the mindset of parents from your generation. It is our hope that they will integrate the present reality with you to identify a developmental trajectory that aligns with your needs and aspirations.

Ultimately, parents desire the best for their children. Therefore, it is reasonable to posit that, once they are given the opportunity to communicate with parents about their actual situation and plans in an objective manner, they will come to understand that it is in their children's best interests to pursue their own plans with confidence.

Furthermore, it will not affect the family's daily responsibilities, allowing them to accommodate certain tasks as needed. This approach could potentially lead to a more mutually beneficial outcome.

It is my hope that you will be able to comprehend the underlying meaning of your parents' statements. Furthermore, I encourage you to delve deeply within yourself to ascertain your genuine aspirations and discover your true passion, which will ultimately illuminate your future path.

I extend my best wishes to you.

Should you wish to continue the dialogue, you are invited to click on the "Find a coach" link, which can be found in the top right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. This will enable you to communicate with me directly.

One Psychology Q&A Community, World, and I Love You: https://m.xinli001.com/qa

Hello, question asker!

When I look at your problem, I think of myself when I was your age, and I also think of my daughter, who is about your age!

I sometimes have disagreements with my daughter about doing the housework, but I always try to compromise because I don't want to delay her studies.

I started doing housework when I was very young, and at the time I didn't think it was a big deal, even though I did complain a bit.

But as you get older, you'll see that the training you got at the time was really useful in your life.

I'm also concerned about whether my daughter will be able to live independently in the future.

For a 15-year-old girl, too much housework can end up delaying her studies.

It's not your job to run the household.

We all have our own roles to play in the family.

It's not right for parents to make their children play their roles.

But it's also about sharing some of the things we can do for our parents.

This is also a great way to grow and develop.

Household chores may be a necessary part of our lives!

We have to be able to.

In the future, we won't go hungry just because we can't cook, and we won't let our living environment become a mess because we can't clean up after ourselves!

We can also create a neat and organized work and living environment for ourselves and those around us by putting in the work, and it will feel great!

At your age, you might have your own ideas and not want to listen to your parents.

But there are times when you also want someone to care for you, someone to love you, and someone to share your sorrows with.

I don't want to grow up!

This is totally normal!

But at some point, we all have to become independent and face the world on our own.

The knowledge and skills we learn today are also going to help us fit in and find our place in society.

If you can switch your mindset from being passive about chores to seeing it as an internship your parents are giving you,

If you try it out and exercise your own conscience, that's a great choice!

Asking your own questions on the platform shows that you're maturing and learning to tackle challenges independently.

I'm really pleased for you!

I hope this helps!

I wish you the best of luck in your studies!

April 11, 2022