As soon as I got a call from my mom, my mood immediately dropped to freezing point. What if I don't want to go home?

Good morning! I extend my warmest regards from afar.

I am grateful for the opportunity to respond to your request for assistance. I hope that my input will prove beneficial and helpful to you.

From your description, it is evident that your mother's persistent nagging since you were young has caused significant trauma to your body and mind. This has led to a strong sense of injustice, anger, and a lack of understanding, acceptance, and affirmation.

In the face of your mother's hurtful words and actions, your former state of weakness and helplessness left you with few options for self-protection. At the time, you were forced to suppress and hide your true emotions, which served as a form of self-defense.

While you may have distanced yourself from your mother's nagging, the emotional and psychological trauma caused by it remains. It has not disappeared, but is still present in your body. When you encounter a similar situation, that part of your trauma will be activated again.

It is therefore necessary for you to attempt to confront the emotions that were previously triggered by your mother's nagging, as well as the emotional trauma, including the desire to be understood, respected, affirmed, accepted, and supported. You can address this aspect of your inner needs by actively learning and developing the skills required to be treated in the way you desire.

When facing time with your mother, it is important to acknowledge and address any emotions of panic or unease that arise. Rather than avoiding, denying, or rejecting these emotions, it is essential to understand and respond to them in a constructive manner. This involves becoming aware of the emotions, experiencing them, and identifying the underlying needs that drive them. Once these needs have been identified, it is possible to respond to them in a manner that is appropriate and in line with your desired outcomes.

For instance, during a meeting with your mother, allow yourself to feel anxious and uneasy. Then, reassure yourself that these feelings are driven by a desire to be accepted, recognized, respected, supported, trusted, and to avoid rejection or disliking. After this, communicate your true feelings to your mother and express your expectations regarding the way you want to be treated.

My name is Lily, and I am the Q&A Pavilion's designated listener. On behalf of myself and the entire organization, I would like to extend our appreciation to you and the entire world.