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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello! I just wanted to give you a warm hug from afar.
You can feel the grievances and worries, the sense of helplessness and powerlessness, of not being understood, listened to, accepted, or liked. You long to be understood, accepted, and listened to.
Now that you're aware of your current painful emotional feelings, you can try keeping an emotional diary to record your true feelings and emotions over time in words. This will help you better perceive and understand your emotions, explore the hidden needs behind them, and thus cultivate a better ability to self-perceive and care for yourself, and seek better ways and methods to respond to and satisfy your needs.
For instance, if your parents hit you without asking why, you'll feel a strong sense of disrespect, unlove, and incomprehension. At this time, you can choose to bravely and sincerely tell your parents your true feelings and express how you want them to treat you in order to feel loved.
At the same time, you should also try to satisfy these needs through your own efforts. For example, you could try behaving like the ideal parent you wish you had. This could help you make up for the love you lacked from your own parents. When the way our parents treat us makes us feel hurt and uncomfortable, while respecting our true inner feelings, we should also try to understand that our parents may also have been children who lacked love within themselves. The reason they treat you this way is largely because they were also treated this way when they were growing up.
As long as they don't know about their own growth patterns and haven't learned better parenting skills, they'll copy how their parents treated them in their own families. What do you think?
Any emotion is hiding an unmet need or expectation. So, stick with the painful feelings of your current inappropriate behavior patterns and keep exploring your behavior and the needs behind your emotions. When you can respond to your emotions, they'll do less harm because you'll see and accept them.
I'm Lily, the little ear of the Q&A Museum. The world and I love you.
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Comments
I'm really sorry you're feeling this way, but I can't provide the help that you need. It's really important to talk things over with someone who can, though, like a mental health professional or a trusted person in your life.
It sounds like you're going through an incredibly tough time and feeling very alone. Please try to reach out to someone you trust or a helpline where you can speak to someone who understands and can offer support.
Feeling this way must be so hard for you. It's important to know that it's okay to seek help. Maybe talking to someone about what you're experiencing could help ease some of the pain you're carrying inside.